


The White Wolf.

by EXOSANGEL



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: A little bit enemies to lover au, Alpha Kim Jongin | Kai, Angst, Bottom Oh Sehun, Chanyeol is Sehun's brother, Comedy, Drama, Fluff, Jongin has silver fur, Jongin is the hotshot head Alpha, M/M, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Omega Oh Sehun, Omega Verse, Romance, Sehun has the rare white wolf, Sehun is a sad little bean, Sehun is witty as hell too and that gets on Jongin's nerves, Sehun isn't your weak damsel in distress Omega, Sexual Tension, Slow Burn, Top Kim Jongin | Kai, a lot of petty banters between SeKai, they hate each other but their wolves want to fuck
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-15
Updated: 2020-12-19
Packaged: 2021-03-01 03:01:34
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 18
Words: 97,641
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23158225
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EXOSANGEL/pseuds/EXOSANGEL
Summary: The one in which Sehun has a lot of problems in his life and Kim Jongin, the new head Alpha of his pack, was the biggest one of them all.ORThe Wolves with White fur were extremely rare and special.An Omega Wolf with White fur even more so.There hasn’t been a single account of one for centuries which was why Sehun's positive that life was playing a sick joke on him when his Wolf turned out to be THE White Wolf.The White Wolf which made him as strong as an average Alpha and the White Wolf which made him the target of the power-hungry Wolves because mating with him made them stronger than the mightest of the Alphas.Packs after Packs have been destroyed in pursuit of a White Wolf.Sehun knew he wasn't going to be spared either.
Relationships: Byun Baekhyun/Do Kyungsoo | D.O, Kim Jongin | Kai/Oh Sehun, Kim Junmyeon | Suho & Zhang Yi Xing | Lay
Comments: 896
Kudos: 1409





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you guys will enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it ^^  
> I will update this fic every other Sunday (which makes it twice a month) so please don't pressure me for updates.  
> Happy reading!

It was an especially dark night.

An endless pitch-black abyss that plagued the sky and consumed all the light from its surroundings leaving only a murky canvas with swirling, grey clouds. There were no stars in the sight, but Sehun knew they were there somewhere hidden behind the cottony tufts, perhaps feeling too shy to show themselves that day in the presence of such a mighty, beautiful full moon. A part of him wondered, why the beams coming from such a magnificent orb were so waned, but then he saw translucent clouds blotching the seemingly unblemished surface of the moon and got his answer.

The sky was completely filled with the dim, grey clouds and hardly included any break in the pattern except for the few random dark patches which didn’t play any exceptional role in the grand schemes of the things. The clouds, on the other hand, looked rather heavy and enabled him to predict rain without inconveniencing his nose because it was already quite evident from the visual alone.

It was about to rain and pretty heavily at that too.

There might be some hailing thrown in the mix as well later on, but Sehun didn’t have enough time to dwell on the weather as he shifted his beady eyes away from the sky towards the front and continued to swiftly break through the strong wind to make his way through the dense trees of the jungle. His paws heavily thudded against the slightly muddy ground – even when his wolf was relatively lighter in weight as compared to the others – and created soft tremors which honestly he would have liked to avoid, but there was a limit to what he could possibly control while trying to keep his ears alert. He had to be absolutely sure that no one was following him; otherwise, the whole purpose of sneaking out would be lost. Also, not to mention the consequences he would have to face if the head Alpha ever got to know about his escapades into the unmarked terrain.

_No_ Omega was allowed to exit the pack territory without an Alpha, Beta or at the very least a companion, especially not in the middle of the night. Sehun, of course, knew that the restriction was for his own safety, but his uncanny timings of making a run in the forest were also within reason.

Normally, while sneaking out, he avoided taking his wolf form until he was safely out of the pack reign because of his strong scent, but today he was sure that the rain would wash away his lingering trail. Moreover, the head Sentinel was sick and the ones under him have been slacking on their patrolling jobs because there was no one to check them and perhaps also because soon there was going to be a shift in the dynamics of the pack which means that the whole system would be re-established and new leaders were going to be appointed. It was honestly the perfect timing for a rival pack to attack, but not a lot of people noticed these shortcomings and loopholes. Even if they did, a victory against the gallant pack of Selene was very unlikely. They were, after all, known to be the strongest among the members of the wolf council and that too was within reason.

Their pack possessed vast stretches of land in the north which was mostly comprised of the mountainous region. The rugged, rocky land was not only a sight to behold with all its beautiful valleys and falls, but was also very rich in metals and minerals, attributing to which they became one of the most important and chief exporters.

Simply put, they were _filthy_ rich.

Adding to that, there were some very rare trees found on these mountains and the wood that came from them was extremely precious. They also had an abundance of dry fruits and thickly furred animals which not only supplied them with raw materials for clothing but meat as well. Of course, it wasn’t ancient times anymore. They didn’t live like the uncivilized wolves. They had a whole education system. Sehun himself was a fifth-year university student in Wolf Academy which was known to be one of the best. It was the twenty-first century for heaven’s sake, but the abundance of meat will always be a pride for a pack because some things always remained the same.

Nevertheless, no matter how beneficial their mountains were, Sehun still preferred the milder weather of the planes of fertile ground that they owned because it came with a thick everlasting Jungle, clean streams of water and abundance of smaller animals which are not as dangerous as the ones in the mountains. The sheer contrast between the landscapes they owned along with the precious raw materials that came with them made their economic position strong.

Sehun slowed down as soon as he noticed the dense forestry thinning out and eventually came to a halt when he caught sight of a small clearing spanning towards the foliage from the steady, crystal stream flowing in the middle of the woods. He stood there, hidden behind the dark trees, for a long moment with a seeking nose, watchful eyes and erect ears before finally stepping out in the open.

This was as far as he had ever dared to go.

The stream in front of him marked one of the boundaries of the territory owned by his pack which meant that hardly anyone ever came here except for the wolves who are traveling or of course the Sentinels. The patrolling wolves were out of the equation for obvious reasons and Sehun didn’t believe that any traveler would be there at this time of the night. Wolves liked to travel on their legs rather than the vehicles because it was faster and more convenient – some did keep the cars – and they mostly liked to do it in the day time. Besides, no one in their sane mind would be loitering around the borders in the middle of a dark Jungle…except for him, of course.

The stream stretched for _miles_ on each end and the only bridge that connected this side of the land to the opposite side was about an hour away on wolf legs. He had never been on the other side. He had simply never gone out of his pack territory, but he has stared out at it with his exceptional eyesight in wonder. It had always intrigued him, but his curiosity wasn’t enough to drive him to try something that may bring permanent damage. The terrain on the opposite side of the stream wasn’t a claimed area which meant that there were a lot of Rogue wolves. Going there alone, even for an Alpha, was dangerous.

Sehun was stupid, but he wasn’t _that_ stupid.

Letting out a tiny chirp, which mostly remained in his throat, he breathed in the fresh, earthy scent and greedily roved his eyes over the serene beauty of his surroundings. To him, the aura of the jungle was as tangible as the water of the stream. It was another sense entirely– one that came to his heart rather than his eyes. It was soaked in richness; the sort of richness that made the wolf inside him practically purr.

It was at peace finally.

The thing was, no matter how suffocating and troublesome it was, Sehun never really blamed the wolf inside him for being so damn irate and frustrated all the time. It was partially his own fault anyway. He was the one who never allowed his wolf to come out like normal ones usually get to do. He never joined the runs, never joined the fights and never took part in any activity that involved his wolf. He kept the beast inside him locked up in the prison of his human body and hardly ever let him take over. In fact, no one in the damned pack – not the people he lives with, not even his closest friends – know that he can shift and he wished to keep it that way which explains his late-night occasional escapades.

The people who didn’t know him thought that he was defected. They thought that it was some illness. The Kim family – the family of the head Alpha he lived within the pack’s main house – and the other people who knew him thought that his Wolf rejected him because that is what _he_ had led them to think; even though he knew that it was far away from the truth.

He has a wolf.

A beautiful, splendid wolf with a lithe, small stature and pure white fur.

Why did he hide it then?

The reason wasn’t that complicated. The wolves with white fur were extremely rare; an Omega wolf with white fur even more so. There hasn’t been a single account of one for centuries which didn’t surprise Sehun at all. He was sure that even if there was one either the wolf’s identity was kept in wraps by their packs for safety purposes or the power-hungry wolves had gotten to the poor beings first and have abused them to their heart’s content before discarding them.

He had heard way too many stories about it to believe otherwise.

A white Omega wolf was strong; more than an average Omega, even more so than a Beta. There were accounts of some which turned out to be as strong as Alphas despite their primary gender. It wasn’t anything bad as per se and that wasn’t the reason that prompted Sehun to hide his identity. He knew he was strong and could easily use it to his advantage, but being a white wolf doesn’t only make him powerful. Whoever, he decides to mate with – Alpha or Beta – will become unusually stronger than the ones of their genders once their wolves bond. It was a cute concept only if his kind wasn’t so power-hungry.

Wolves loved power. They were addicted to it and they would do absolutely anything to attain it. Sehun didn’t even want to think about what would happen if they ever found out about him. He wasn’t going to be a person in their eyes then. He would just be a tool, a prey and a prize they needed to get their hands on at all costs. He might be stronger than an average Omega, but no amount of strength can protect him from this kind of pursue, especially when he had no Alpha to protect him.

The sudden sound of the leaves getting crushed underweight caused his ears to twitch before Sehun abruptly faced the front. The noise came directly from the opposite side of the stream which put his wolf ill at ease. Maybe he was overreacting. After all, it could only be a small, harmless animal, but there was also a possibility that it was a Rogue. It shouldn’t be a problem at the moment though he would lose this spot from then on because there was no way he was coming back to this side after being spotted alone like this.

For a second, there was nothing out of the ordinary that caught his attention, but soon his beady eyes focused on the shadowy stature of a rather huge wolf. The other beast dexterously stepped out from the darkness of the plantation on the other side, surprisingly very light on his paws despite the huge stature, before moving closer to the edge of the stream.

The first thing that Sehun registered was that if it wasn’t for the sound of the leaves earlier, he wouldn’t even have detected the wolf’s presence which meant that he was extremely well-trained. The second thing that his consciousness mind collected was the fact that whoever it was, was a very strong Alpha – the huge size spoke for itself – judging from the aura that came from him. The third and the last thing that basically knocked the breath out of his lungs was the silver color of the other’s fur which gleamed in quite an ethereal manner under the faded glow of the moonlight.

It was Kim Jongin.

The soon to be head Alpha of his pack, chosen by the moon goddess, Selene, herself. Now he would have thought that it was any other random Rogue, but silver fur, like his white one, was also very special. It wasn’t something that has been missing for decades, but it wasn’t very casual or usual either. It was the coat gifted by the moon goddess to the chosen head Alpha of the Selene pack only.

_Oh boy…_

Sehun felt his heart drop to his stomach before it swiftly swooped back up to lodge inside his throat. The moisture in the air was pretty dense at the moment which meant that the pheromones didn’t travel as far as they usually do. He could only detect dredges of Jongin’s scent which is saying something because an Alpha’s pheromones are really strong. It was a possibility that the other wolf can’t detect his’ but he couldn’t be sure because once again an Alpha’s nose is a lot more sensitive.

He wondered if Jongin did catch his scent would he be able to recognize him.

When was the last time they met in person? Eleven years ago? He was twelve back then and now he was twenty-three. That’s a lot of time for one person – who wasn’t even that close to him, to begin with – to forget his scent or maybe his entire existence.

That was very much possible.

Jongin, for sure, had a lot of other important people to remember other than the orphan Omega to whom his father has given a shelter because Sehun’s parents died protecting the head Alpha’s mate.

From what he remembers and from what he has heard, his parents had an important position in the pack and had a very close relationship with the Kim and Byun family which would explain why Byun Baekhyun and Kim Minseok have been Sehun’s only friends for as long as he remembers. In fact, the only reason he came across Jongin before his parents died was mostly because the other was Minseok’s elder brother. It might be because even as a kid, Sehun wasn’t that interested in the other wolves. He has always been an introvert and for the most part of his life, he had desperately sought the attention of only one wolf – Chanyeol, his older half-brother.

He had, no doubt, shared a nice friendship with others too, but mostly he didn’t really form strong bonds – where he was able to feel whether the other person was in pain or danger even without being with them – with anyone other than Baekhyun and Minseok.

Sehun was snapped out of his thoughts when he once again caught Jongin’s wolf taking a step closer to the stream. A normal person wouldn’t have been able to tell from so far, but he could see his silvery fur getting wet as his paws gradually came in contact with the cold water of the stream.

_What is he doing here?_

He was sure that the Alpha wasn’t supposed to be reaching Selene before noon the next day. At least, that was what he has heard from Mrs. Kim and Minseok. The group of wolves has exited the Northern mountain ranges almost four days ago and their expected time of arrival was early in the dawn tomorrow – a few more hours from now – but the Head Alpha has advised them to camp outside the territory till noon since the people of the pack were excited to welcome back their future leaders and dawn was way too early for it be a very suitable time for them to do that.

_They must have reached earlier than expected._

A heavy raindrop that pelted down on his snot jolted him to awareness again just in time the silver wolf tilted his head – as if he was thoroughly scrutinizing the white beast in front of him – and confidently stepped inside the stream.

Sehun’s heartbeat spiked up again. This time under the influence of the fear that coursed through his body.

As mentioned before, their pack was one of the stronger packs – if not the strongest – in the wolf council and that was not only because of their strong economic position. A stable, rising economy would have been of no use if other important aspects weren’t taken under consideration as well; the most important of them being their ability to protect the pack against any sort of attacks, damage or harm and lending out a helping hand out for the other packs who were in need of it – so basically warrior strength was perhaps even more important than their economic position because wolves loved to fight. It was in their nature. Just because they have decided to live in a civilized manner didn’t mean others needed to conform to it as well.

Hunger for power and domination was in a wolf’s nature, especially an Alpha. It had an affinity to be tamed, but it could never be extinguished.

Selene was on top of the hierarchy, but that wasn’t easily achieved. Yes, their ancestors have been blessed by the moon goddess and they did enjoy some advantages from that, but nothing could have been achieved if the leaders of their pack weren’t trained properly. Hard work was the key and their pack took that notion very seriously, a little too seriously maybe – what was the point of sending a thirteen years old kid away from his parents – but then again the elder wolves did know better than him. That was why the chosen six – the ones _blessed_ with a special mark by Selene – were sent to live and train in the harshest environment of the Northern mountains. It was kind of a tradition for decades now and had maintained the position of their pack so maybe it worked as well.

Another, special unit of Wolf Academy also operated there just for the wolves who were sent there to train so that the future leaders could also keep up with their education. Sehun didn’t really keep up with any of their ages, but Jongin was supposed to be the youngest among them. Considering that he was the same age as Sehun meant that he was twenty-three which made him a final-year student in the university. The other guys with him should be in their fourth or fifth years or maybe they have graduated already, but as he said before he didn’t exactly have any semantic details except for, of course, Chanyeol.

That wasn’t important though.

What he was concerned about the most at the moment was the fact that Jongin was highly trained and huge which meant that it was quite possible for him to cross that rapidly flowing stream on his legs without getting drowned and get to Sehun in a matter of minutes.

_I can’t let him._

His secret would be revealed.

_It would end everything for me._

The anxiety inside him welled up further (without any control) which significantly affected the wolf inside him too because it let loose an unwarranted whimper. The distressed sound must have reached the other wolf’s ears too because the Alpha stilled in his place right away. As if indulging in a game of cat and mouse, they stared at each other with watchful eyes for a silent minute or so – in the back of his mind the Omega realized that the rain has slowly started to turn into a heavy downpour and that was probably his best chance to escape – before Jongin finally leaped forward.

Without a moment of hesitation, Sehun turned around and bolted.

A loud growl sounded from somewhere behind him (undoubtedly it came from Jongin) which oddly and unreasonably settled into the crevices of his body and soul and shook the Omega inside him to the core, but Sehun ignored it to best of his abilities and tore his way through the dense trees of the woods as fast as his legs could carry him; all the while hoping that the other wolf won’t be fast enough to catch up to him and of course, that the rain would wash away his trail.

He was about two minutes into his swift run, with his heart beating inside his head from the sheer adrenaline coursing through his body when he felt the ground underneath his feet reverberating.

_Fuck!_

_He is on the land already._

His panicked mind registered before he abruptly skidded to the left and entered the hidden cavity carved inside the trunk of a huge tree. It has long branches that hung heavily towards the ground and effectively concealed the whole entrance. The scent of the flowers of the tree was pretty potent as well which would hide his pheromones, especially now when he has shifted back to his human form.

Sehun has been to this place a lot. This was his hiding spot or the spot where he usually left his clothes whenever he shifted into his wolf form while sneaking out. He has chosen this place after putting a lot of thought into it which means that he should be safe here. He really should be. There is no way Jongin can track him down. The other hadn’t been to these woods for ten years. He can’t know this forest as well as Sehun. Plus, the rain should be to his advantage greatly.

_Why is he getting closer then?_

While getting here, he has taken so many unnecessary turns that were sufficient to confuse anyone. Jongin really has to be a very special breed if he managed to track him down through all that in this heavy downpour.

_He can’t._

Sehun tried to console himself while regretting his decision to stop and hide instead of just keep on running, but then again that wouldn’t have been to his advantage all that much because then Jongin would have known where he was by feeling the tremors in the ground. That would have been a lot easier and there was no way he would have escaped. Hiding, at least, gave him some hope even when it was swiftly dwindling.

Sehun breath got stuck in his lungs as soon as he heard the nearby leaves crunching. He had to physically stop himself from getting up and bolting out once again to get away from the danger as much as it was possible and focused on making no sound or movement. _Heck!_ He didn’t even breathe, but somehow Jongin still continued to accurately move in his direction.

_Go away. Go away. Go away!_

He slammed his eyes shut in anxious anticipation and let out a silent breath when the other wolf took a step slightly in the wrong direction. There was a possibility that the tree was doing its job very well in concealing his scent because Jongin seemed confused about his whereabouts; he continued to take a few steps in different directions before returning back to his original spot again.

Sehun really hoped that the other would just give up and go.

It seemed like his prayers were answered because a loud howl filled the silence of the night just in time Jongin took a step in the right direction. He deduced that it was a howl of call by one of the guys because the Alpha immediately turned around and gave a howl of his own as an acknowledgment. It was once again followed by an answering howl which Sehun didn’t really know the meaning of (he was in his human form), but it must have been important because Jongin sniffed around the place half-heartedly once more before finally giving up.

The Omega sagged in relief as soon as he felt the other wolf running towards the stream again.

_Damn,_ that was close. He was ready to cry happy tears.

…………

Thanks a lot for reading! 

Kudos and Comments are highly appreciated.

Plus, you can follow me on

Twitter: [@exosangel7](https://twitter.com/exosangel7)

Curious Cat: [exosangel7](https://curiouscat.me/exosangel7) if you have any question regarding the fic ^^


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I made some changes to the previous chapter. They are pretty minor so you don't have to read it again. Here is a list,  
> 1\. Sehun is twenty-three instead of twenty-two  
> 2\. Jongin is the same age as him  
> 3\. Sehun is the final year medical student which is his fifth year - a lot of countries have four, but there are ones with five as well. The medical and legal system that I have built in the fic is not based on reality (it is fictional) so um...please don't take any notes from here hehe. I tried to stay realistic, but have also bent a lot of things to suit my narrative.
> 
> Other than that, please enjoy a lot ^^

“Sehun,” The said male groaned with his eyes closed and faced the opposite side when he heard a soft, gentle feminine voice calling for his attention.

“Sweetheart, you need to get up.”

“I don’t want to.” He whined before petulantly burying his face under the pillow when all he got in response was a breathy chuckle.

“You have to though so get your lazy bum out of the bed.”

“No, let me sleep for an hour more…please,” He belatedly made his bargain a request once he remembered just who he was talking to.

Mrs. Kim, or better known as Kim Minyoung, may have raised him like one of her own, but she was still the mate of the head Alpha of the pack. No matter how gentle she was or how much she loved him, he was sure she won’t tolerate disrespect.

“Sehunnie~ get up!” She urged him before reaching out and pulling on his exposed cheek.

Sehun let out a disgruntled noise of protest.

“Do you want me to call your head Alpha?”

“But I am tired,” Sehun complained under his breath but nonetheless shoved the pillow away from his face.

“Do you want me to be tired the whole day?”

“You are such a drama queen.” Minyoung chastised with good humor before patting his back. Sehun laid there for a moment basking in her maternal touch before sighing and finally sitting up. He let out another noise of complaint when his cheeks were pulled again though he couldn’t really stop himself from smiling when she playfully ruffled his hairs.

“You look so excited today.” He noted while swinging his legs off the bed.

“Of course, I do! Three of my sons are coming back.” She responded right away with such a blinding smile that for a second, he could do nothing, but to stare at her beautiful face. It was almost like she hasn’t aged at all even though she had four sons who were almost the same age as him.

“Are you not excited about today?”

“What is there to be excited about?” Sehun responded with the shrug of his shoulders while staring out of the window.

He wasn’t lying when he said that he was tired. After he was sure that Jongin was all the way on the other side of the stream again he had run home as fast as he could and had taken a shower. Keeping in mind that he would have to get up early in the morning, the Omega had gone to the bed straight, but the thought that somehow his identity would get exposed had kept him up almost throughout the whole nigh–

“Your brother is coming back.”

“What brother are you talking about, Minyoung?” Sehun inquired curtly before turning to face her.

“The one who wants nothing to do with me?”

“Sehun…” Minyoung started with a frown, but she only ended up trailing off because what he said was indeed the truth. She couldn’t refute it no matter how hard she tried. The radiant smile on her face dimmed before fading out completely which made him feel guilty. It was supposed to be her happy day today. He had no right to ruin it with his cynicism.

“Now, don’t frown like that.” He scolded with a small smile and poked a finger in the middle of her forehead.

“You should try and forgive him.” Apparently, she wasn’t in favor of letting the topic go.

“Minyoung, you forgive people who ask for your forgiveness.” Sehun pointed out with a resigned sigh. He didn’t want to talk about it now out of all the times.

“You have changed so much. I can’t say I am exactly happy with it. I promised to be like your mother, but I feel like I have failed you.” Minyoung expressed with a sad smile and reached out to caress his face.

“When you were younger, you always used to look forward to this very day even when Chanyeol didn’t use to talk to you.”

“I was stupid back then.”

“You were kind and forgiving.” She contradicted strongly.

“I miss that.” Sehun averted his gaze away from hers as soon as he heard that. She didn’t understand it. He used to be stupid and way too forgiving when it came to his brother.

Their father, Oh Kangin, was a very brave and loyal Alpha. He was the lead warrior and served the role of the second in command to the head Alpha of the Selene pack. He was also a great and loving father though that was what Sehun thought. Chanyeol totally disagreed with him on that for reasons that _he_ still didn’t fully understand.

His brother wasn’t always like that.

From what Sehun knows, his father was greatly in love with Chanyeol’s mother and he was absolutely devastated when his mate has died from an illness when Chanyeol was a mere boy of two. Upon being pushed by the pack, he has taken up another mate, more for his son’s sake than his own, two months later. It was Sehun’s Omega father.

He didn’t remember a lot, but Chanyeol used to really love him. They were a happy family too. He used to have a loving brother. His parents used to have a kind-hearted son. At least, that was the case until Chanyeol turned seven. Sehun really has no idea what went wrong. He was only four. He didn’t even remember a lot from that time, but what stuck with him was the pain of rejection from his own brother. His once caring and doting brother for some reason started hating him.

Actually, hate was quite an underwhelmed emotion to describe Chanyeol’s behavior. Indifferent was the right word and somehow it stung even more. It hurt so much and just like a poison, it has slowly eroded Sehun’s confidence in every person out there.

If his own flesh and blood could do this to him, what stopped other people from doing the same?

It was just so painful.

Hate would have been tolerable because that was an emotion. That meant his brother felt something for him and knew he existed. Maybe they could have even fought it out, but _this_ was lethal. Suddenly, it was like none of them existed for Chanyeol; not his parents, not even Sehun who used to look up to him so much.

There was a chance if his parents hadn’t died just a year after that, their family could have been fixed again, but there was no use in thinking over it again. He had done that enough, held onto those pleasant memories of his brother enough and have chased the elder male like a fool without any dignity for years until the truth has slapped him across his face harshly and have woken him up from his false hopes and dreams.

He would never wait for Chanyeol to accept him again. There was no use to, especially not when his brother couldn’t even make an exception when Sehun needed him the most. He may not want to acknowledge the relation they had, but they were still blood-related.

Was he so heartless to still not come to him after hearing what happened?

Lord! He needed him so much back then. He had begged him to come for him, especially for that night, but Chanyeol had abandoned him a long time ago. Sehun just couldn’t see it back then. He hadn’t wanted to see the blatant truth because he had been so, so scared, but his brother made him see it. He made him realize just how alone he was in this world.

That night ruined him and it could all have been prevented if Chanyeol would have been there.

“It is too late for forgiveness, Minyoung,” Sehun muttered under his breath gravely before blinking his eyes to will away the tears that have gathered there.

“The person that I used to be, seems so far away now. That n-night…that night if Chanyeol was there-” He broke off when he felt gentle hands steadying his shaky ones and looked up at her with glassy eyes.

“Sehun-” She started, looking extremely concerned, but he cut her off.

“I can’t forgive him. Don’t ask me to. You know, whenever you mention him that night plays in front of my eyes, Minyoung. I-I can’t.”

“I won’t.” Minyoung instantly consoled.

“I won’t ask you to do anything.” She continued while pulling him into her embrace. Sehun closed his eyes and breathed in the pheromones that she has released to comfort him.

“No one will force you to talk to him once he is back. I promise.”

“Thanks-”

“Sehunnie!” Baekhyun barged inside his room even before he could properly convey his gratitude to Minyoung.

“Why are you still in bed?” His friend inquired in an irritatingly loud voice before crossing his arms over his chest.

“We have to get ready. Mom brought all the clothes for us already. Come on, Minseok is in my room too. Today is a _special_ day.”

“You are just happy that Kyungsoo is coming back and you can finally annoy him in peace. Poor guy.” Sehun grumbled under his breath with a scoff before pulling away from Minyoung.

“He is so damn annoying.”

“I am standing right here if you forgot.” Baekhyun protested with a scowl before shaking his head.

“Why are you still not getting up?”

“Why are you still in my room, shorty?” Sehun shot back which only caused his friend to glare at him.

“Minyoung!” Baekhyun protested after he noticed that he wasn’t going to get any apology out of his ungrateful friend and smiled in victory when the elder female whacked Sehun on the back of his head.

“Behave, Sehun. You know he doesn’t like it when you call him that.”

“It is not my fault that he is so damn tiny.”

“Not my fault you are unnaturally tall!” Baekhyun retaliated indignantly before grabbing a pillow.

“Whatever you say, short-mmph” Sehun words got muffled against the pillow when it hit his face.

“How was that?” His friend inquired with a smug smile though that smile soon turned upside down when he saw Sehun taking hold of a pillow too.

“I will show it to you, Byun.” Sehun declared with a smirk and bolted up from the bed as soon as Baekhyun ran out of the room while cackling.

“Please, don’t ruin my pillows,” Minyoung shouted after them though Sehun was sure she was happy that he wasn’t moping anymore.

* * *

“This is ridiculous” Minseok burst out in irritation while leaning over the railing, appearing quite impatient.

They were currently on the balcony inside the packhouse which was a very modern and massive structure. It consisted of two attached brick buildings (vastly covered in vines) of about the same size with a huge ground in the middle separating them. The building in the front was open for everyone. It was a lot like a guesthouse (which was free of cost even when it was loaded with all the facilities) and was most mostly operated under the official system that is set up by the collective correspondence of all the leaders.

The back building, on the other hand, served a two-fold purpose. It served as the personal lodging of the head Alpha and his family but was also a sort of dormitory for the chosen leaders where they were allowed to live for as long as they wanted. At the moment, the packhouse was quite literally empty except for, of course, the Kim family which wasn’t that surprising because the leaders have all formed their own family and moved out into their own houses.

The bottom line was the fact that only a limited amount of people were allowed in there and the corridors that attached the two buildings were mostly sealed shut. It also had a proper back gate which was one again only used by the few selected people that were allowed to enter.

The huge ground in the middle of the two buildings had a gate as well and was mostly only opened for public events. The welcoming ceremony today was being held there and Sehun would have been down with his friends if Minyoung hadn’t advised them to watch the ceremony from the balcony because apparently it was very tedious and uninteresting. She was sure that they would get bored soon and would want to go back inside which won’t really leave a good impression on the others so it was simply better not to go out.

The guys would be coming inside the house anyway.

“How much longer will it take?” His friend continued with a frown when none of them gave him a response.

“I don’t know,” Baekhyun crooned out in boredom after another moment of silence.

“Mom was talking about some stupid protocol earlier.”

“I don’t get the point of this,” Sehun grumbled with a scowl before self-consciously smoothing his hand down the baby pink ( _yes, baby pink!)_ silk shirt he was wearing.

“I mean, I understand that people wanted to welcome them and show their gratitude. It makes sense since these guys have trained their asses off for the sake of the pack, but is it really necessary to show-off like this? The public is gathered here. They can just come, do whatever ceremony they are required to do and be done with this whole thing. Why do the elders have to send a whole troop of Wolves to the borders to _escort_ them properly? If they have traveled alone so far, I am sure a few miles more won’t make any difference.”

“I really don’t understand ancient people.” Baekhyun mocked with a sigh.

“The guys must be exhausted from the journey too. This is just making the whole process unreasonably long.”

“I am just going inside-”

“I think they are coming.” Minseok cut Sehun off and perked up in his place.

“Are you sure?” Baekhyun doubted right away while craning his neck to get a proper look.

_He really is tiny._

“It should be them. I see silver fur.” Sehun confirmed for his struggling friend before patting Baekhyun’s head in sympathy.

“Should I bring a stool for you, Baek?”

“No, you should just fuck off.” The shorter male retaliated with a grimace and swatted his hand away to fix his hair.

“I don’t see you working with Kyungsoo honestly.” Sehun continued.

“Both of you are short. Imagine your kids. They’ll be tinier than you are.”

“I am flattered that you have enough confidence in my seduction skills to even think of my kids with Kyungsoo. That Alpha hates me,” Baekhyun replied blankly.

“Besides, why do you always target me? Minseok is shorter than me!”

“Minseok didn’t force me to wear a freaking pink shirt and he didn’t get on my nerves, first thing in the morning,” Sehun replied with the shrug of his shoulders.

“But the shirt makes you look so pretty!” Baekhyun protested with a frown before smacking his shoulder.

“And what I did in the morning was to cheer you up. You should have known that…” The slight smile on Sehun’s face slipped away slightly.

“I do know that,” He acknowledged in a small voice before looking down at his hands.

“…and I really didn’t intend to ruin the mood, but Minyoung brought up Chanyeol-”

“It is okay, Sehunnie.” Minseok consoled gently before rubbing his back.

“You will get over it one day.” Sehun wanted to laugh at that because he knew that wasn’t true.

“I hope so.”

“You don’t really mean it, do you?” Baekhyun pointed out with a scoff before playfully pulling on his left ear which caused the taller male to wince.

“You know, you need to have a positive mindset to get happy things.”

“Yeah, yeah, mother...” Sehun mocked and pulled his ear free from Baekhyun’s painful grip with a scowl.

“I swear one day-”

“They are here!” Minseok brought their focus back to the situation at hand just in time a pack of seven Wolves came deftly running past the main gates of the pack house’s ground.

Forgetting whatever he was going to say, Sehun stepped closer to the railing and almost unconsciously searched the group for one particular Wolf with black fur. It wasn’t really hard to spot him, considering the fact that there was only one black Wolf among the new-comers and also because he was running right beside the silver Wolf in the very front which wasn’t surprising or unexpected. Chanyeol, after all, was going to be the second in command to the future head Alpha.

Sehun allowed his eyes to aimlessly follow the pack of Wolves as they were, almost immediately, lead towards the rooms located in the outside corridors of the packhouse – most probably clothes were kept for them there – feeling strangely detached and emotionless, as the loud, cheering noise of the crowd slowly blended into the background.

“ _Damn_ , Jongin and Chanyeol have huge Wolves.” Baekhyun whistled in fascination before turning to face Sehun.

“It never ceases to amaze me, no matter how many times I have seen them in person.” Sehun merely shrugged his shoulders in response, feeling bitter over the fact that this was only the second time _he_ was seeing Chanyeol’s Wolf despite being his brother. Baekhyun and Minseok had often shown him pictures throughout the years, but they have done no justice to the real thing.

“Yixing has a pretty big Wolf too and he is an Omega,” Minseok added in with a hum.

“Do you think that has something to do with them being the chosen one?”

“It might be though Jongdae has a smaller Wolf as compared to others,” Baekhyun responded with a scrunched nose.

“It can be because of all that training. The trainers there are especially stingy or I don’t know...maybe we are thinking too much and it is just how they naturally are. What do you think, Sehunnie?”

“How would I know?” Sehun posed blankly before crossing his arms over his chest.

“You are the smartest one among us,” Baekhyun pointed out nonchalantly.

“Does not really mean I have to know everything.” The taller male responded with a sigh which caused Minseok to face him with a frown.

“Are you alright?”

_Am I?_

“Yeah, why won’t I be?” Sehun questioned off-handedly, contradicting his own thoughts.

“Uh…I just thought that you were being unusually quiet.” His friend answered a bit hesitantly; not looking convinced at all.

_Who am I kidding?_

“I was just thinking about something.” He justified and peered down when one of the doors was thrown open.

Kim Jongin stepped out of the room in all his glory, wearing a black cotton shirt and pants that were a little bit loose on his lean stature. The thin, almost translucent, fabric fluttered against the strong gusts of wind, as the other male slowly, but surely made his way towards the main podium that was set up especially for the ceremony.

From where Sehun was standing, it seemed like Jongin was a centimeter or two shorter than him. It wasn’t by much, but the difference still reminded him of just how lanky he was for an Omega, who were mostly known for being petite. He didn’t really mind it. There were stronger Omegas as well – Yixing, for an instance, was all hard muscles, at least from what he has seen in pictures – and his rare strong physique was most probably due to his Wolf kind. He didn’t exactly want to change anything.

Coming back, Jongin was also all about sharp angles and chiseled firm muscles from what Sehun can see. He was built, but not overly so and most importantly he knew how to carry himself properly with confidence that did not look misplaced or forced. He was a leader in a natural sense. There was just an aura about him, something about his over-all appearance, his body language that gave away his status.

Another thing that caught Sehun’s attention was his beautiful, tan skin. It was glowing in an almost ethereal manner under the golden rays of the Sun which only highlighted his angular features, even more, especially his jaw. Perhaps it was natural or maybe it was a result of training under the sun; whatever it was, the exquisite skin color made him stand out among the crowd for sure.

Kim Jongin was over-all an ideal and stereotypically handsome Alpha which any Omega would die to have; at least, as far as his physical appearance and appeal were concerned. Sehun, of course, hadn’t been a stranger to that fact. He has seen his pictures – he lived in the Alpha’s house, with his parents so it was impossible not to – but like he had said before they hadn’t really done justice to the real thing. Moreover, he didn’t really care about his appearance that much. Sometimes most beautiful people have the most horrible personalities and Jongin looked like he could be all sorts of arrogant and conceited.

Sehun could be wrong, but he could be very on point as well.

“What is he focusing so hard on?” Minseok’s sudden inquiry pulled the taller Omega out of his thoughts.

“Are you talking about Jongin?” Baekhyun responded with a wrinkled forehead.

“If yes, then he looks normal to me. He isn’t even looking at anyone.”

“He is my brother, I know him,” Minseok argued before pressing his lips in a thin line.

“I think he is trying to locate a scent…maybe?” Sehun stiffened in his place right away as soon as he heard that.

“W-What makes you think that?” It wasn’t possible, was it? Jongin can’t detect his scent in such a big crowd. That was impossible. He’s all the way up here.

_He followed my trail in heavy rain, yesterday though…_

“No specific reason. It is just a guess,” Minseok responded with the shrug of his shoulders.

“I could be wrong too.”

_Why would you say that then?_

Sehun whined internally and would have most probably voiced it out too if his friend hasn’t suddenly perked up in the excitement and waved his hand like an eager child. Baekhyun, beside him, appeared overly zealous as well which kind of gave him an idea of just who was looking in their direction.

_He didn’t locate my scent, right?_

With his heart literally beating inside his head, Sehun gulped nervously before reluctantly facing the front too and it was _indeed_ because of his sheer bad luck that he ended up making eye contact with Jongin almost instantly.

_Shit, shit, shit…_

He panicked internally when Jongin held his gaze for a solid few seconds – Sehun wanted to look away so bad, but something about the expression in the other’s eyes kept him frozen – before his dark, curious eyes slowly trailed down.

It honestly made him feel so damn anxious.

Now, it wasn’t the first time someone was staring at him. Despite being a bit too tall for an Omega, Sehun was pretty. He has always had his fair share of admirers if he was to say for himself, and people have stared, but he has never felt the burning weight of someone’s gaze like he was feeling Jongin’s. It was almost like the Alpha was staring right through his soul and somehow knew all his secrets, especially with the way he slightly tilted his head to the side in interest right before his gaze jumped back up.

Sehun turned away before their eyes could meet again and absentmindedly stared towards the corridor while anxiously fiddling with his hands.

Thankfully, Baekhyun and Minseok didn’t take notice of that.

The next person to come out after Jongin was Yixing though he didn’t walk towards the podium and instead went to stand outside one of the other closed doors.

Junmyeon, his mate, must be in there.

If he was remembering correctly then the two have started dating almost five years ago and have officially mated three years into their relationship. Sehun was genuinely very happy for them since they made such a cute couple and were so disgustingly adorable together that it might give someone diabetes.

He shifted his gaze back towards the corridor when another door was thrown open.

Chanyeol stepped out of his room dressed in the same attire as the others and like Yixing walked down the passage to stand outside another closed door.

_His mate must be in there._

Sehun noted apathetically before taking in his brother’s familiar form and features. He hadn’t changed all that much in the past ten years. He still had those almond-shaped big, brown eyes, that proud forehead, straight nose, endearingly big ears and a grin full of teeth which just like always was directed at other people instead of Sehun.

_Yixing must have said something very funny._

Somehow thinking about how he would have to keep up with Chanyeol’s indifferent and hostile attitude once again stung him even more than it used to before. It sent a pang to his burnt heart and filled him with a sense of emptiness so painful that it brought tears to his eyes.

_I can’t do it…not again._

Sehun knew that it was going to wound him deeply once again and he wasn’t sure whether he had it inside him to bear it this time.

“I-I am going inside.”

“But why?” Baekhyun objected right away and held onto his arm.

“Wait for the ceremony to start, at least. Chanyeol will-”

“Chanyeol what?” Sehun demanded harshly and turned to face his friend with tears threatening to spill past his eyes. He didn’t get it. Why didn’t people see that he wanted nothing to do with his fucking brother?

“Why should I do anything for him? Look at how happy he is. Look at that grin. I am sure he would be a lot happier if he doesn’t have to see my face.”

“Sehun, that’s not the truth.” Minseok entreated, appearing extremely upset when he saw tears spilling past Sehun’s eyes.

“Stop lying to me!” He accused, feeling poisonous anger filling his veins.

“I am tired, okay and I am scared. I can’t do this again.”

“Sehunnie…” Baekhyun called out in alarm and held onto his shoulders in concern.

“It will kill me this time. His indifference will kill me, Baek. It will kill me.” Sehun sniffled with trembling lips.

“It is okay,” Baekhyun assured in an attempt to calm him down.

“You will be okay,” His friend continued and ran a consoling hand up his back.

“Who cares about him anyway? You are right, there is no need to stay here for him. Let’s go inside, hmm?”

“Don’t you want to stay out?” Sehun questioned when Baekhyun carefully turned him towards the door.

“Nah~ Minseok can stay here for the guys. I will just meet them later in the lounge.” His friend responded kindly which made him feel awful about himself. He has just snapped at him so harshly, but Baekhyun was still being so damn gentle with him.

“I am so sorry for snapping at you earlier.” Sehun apologized weakly.

“No need for that.” Baekhyun demurred immediately.

“Asking you to do something for Chanyeol was obviously wrong, especially when he has been such an asshole. I just wanted you to stay there for the other guys.”

“Why would they even care if I am there or not, Baek?”

“You are being unfair to them now.” His friend scolded him with a disapproving frown.

“Whenever we went to visit them they have always asked about your well-being. They have always asked us to bring you along the next time around and you know they have always tried to talk to you whenever they called home. You were the one who never said anything more than a hello and that’s okay. I know you don’t feel comfortable talking to people that you are not very close with,” His friend broke off there to heave a sigh.

“…but they couldn’t approach you any other way, Sehun. They were neither allowed to keep phones of their own or leave the academy before the training finished and you know that.” God, Sehun felt like such an asshole. Sometimes, he unconsciously – and very unfairly as well – projected his bitter feelings towards Chanyeol on the other guys as well.

“They have been excited to meet you again after such a long time. Besides, these are the future leaders of the pack, Hun. You can’t disrespect them like this, not without a proper reason, and even if you were allowed to we both know you can’t avoid them for the rest of your whole life.” Baekhyun finished off with an imploring smile which finally convinced Sehun to nod his head in agreement.

“I will come down later to meet them.”

“Thanks, I knew you would understand.”

* * *

Thanks a lot for reading :)  
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	3. Chapter 3

The inside of the packhouse was a lot more jovial and earthy as compared to the outside brick edifice. It was open, airy and spacious with balconies and patios (indoor and outdoor) and verandas spread all over the structure which purified the whole place from the stale air that usually made breathing a taxing task.

On slow, peaceful days, Sehun liked to sit outside on the balcony that was right next to his room with a book in his hand and simply admired the nature around him. He adored with his whole heart the magnificent view of the lush green forest that was located at some distance from their house and loved to drink in the huge gulps of fresh, musky aroma that it sent their way as a blessing.

Moreover, the balconies allowed the cute little birds of different kinds to come inside the house. They usually sat on one of the wooden banisters placed inside the launch on the second floor and twittered away to their heart’s content, creating sweet melodies that melted his heart. Sehun often spent hours watching the small, vulnerable creatures, as they came and went, sometimes feeling oddly fascinated by the way their movements, along with the breeze outside made the thin, pale-yellow curtains flutter.

The packhouse truly was his safe sanctuary.

It was his heaven.

The whole place gave off a homely feeling, a sort of an aura that pertained the sense of belongingness and made the people living inside it feel protected. It was rugged and lived in. Every corner of the house told a story. It was filled with laughter, hushed whispers and secretive giggles which sometimes he was a part of and sometimes he wasn’t; but it was precious all the same.

The whole color scheme of the interior was another thing that he appreciated.

The roofs, walls, and floorboards of the house were made of Red Oak wood stained with a natural color which enhanced the sylvan wood grain. The roof also had the cylindrical panels made of timber joined in a symmetrical manner. Attached to them were wooden banisters decorated with earthen plant pots almost everywhere in the house. Wild vines were thrown over them just to increase the rustic effect.

Everything altogether made an aesthetic that gave him a sense of being close to nature.

  
“You are such a menace.” That was the first thing Sehun heard as soon as he stepped inside the indoor-patio on the first floor where everyone was gathered. Feeling mildly confused (and a lot more amused) he lingered on the last step of the stairs and slightly craned his neck to see who was speaking.

A soft snort left his lips when he noticed that it was Kyungsoo who has addressed such kind words towards Baekhyun.

It wasn’t surprising at all.

“As if you are any better.” Shaking his head at Baekhyun’s lame response, Sehun finally walked down the final step, though he really couldn’t find it in himself to go any closer to the sitting area. Perhaps, because he was scared – he hated to admit it, but the fact that coming face to face with Chanyeol after so many years was doing weird things to his nerves still remained a truth – that nothing was going to save him from the lethal attack of the indifference that has slowly killed him from inside (his whole god damn life) until he was nothing, but a bitter mess or maybe it was because every person sitting there (excluding Minyoung, Minseok, Baekhyun, and the head Alpha) was quite literally a stranger to him.

He has never been comfortable around strangers.

“Oh, hey! You finally came down.” The abrupt address from Junmyeon ( _damn_ that was one bright smile) jolted Sehun out of his thoughts. He stood in his place frozen for a second – he was still having second thoughts about this meeting and was considering just going back to his room – before hesitantly taking a step closer to where everyone was sitting.

“Y-Yeah,” His reply sounded a lot more awkward then he intended for it to be, but he couldn’t really help it; not when everyone ( _everyone)_ was looking at him.

“It is nice to have you back.” It was common courtesy, at least Sehun could do that properly without sounding like he wanted to run away. 

“Welcome home.”

“Thanks! We are so happy to be back. Mountains are way too cold.” Junmyeon complained good-naturedly before casually walking up to him, appearing completely ignorant of the awkwardness that was coming off Sehun in steady waves.

“Don’t just stand there. Come and sit with us. I was asking mom about you just now.”

“Sorry…I wasn’t feeling well.” Sehun mumbled while schooling his expression into one of blank indifference. He did feel slightly guilty for lying, but not so much because it was true to at least some extent. He really did feel sick to his stomach at the moment due to nervousness.

“No need to be sorry. You are here now.” Junmyeon waved his apology off – his mellow and gentle attitude threw Sehun off – and beckoned him to follow. Feeling quite mystified (and out of the place) Sehun mindlessly followed the other male and didn’t realize what he was doing until he was a few steps away from the couch Jongin was sitting on; apparently the spot next to the Alpha was the only vacant place for him to sit.

_Fuck!_

Sehun, of course, has sprayed a generous amount of perfume on himself to conceal his natural scent (he wasn’t stupid), but that didn’t mean he was safe. It might work if he maintains his distance from Jongin, but sitting right next to him would practically equate to handing over his secret to the other. There was no way he was going to take that spot, especially not when he knew just how sharp Jongin’s nose actually was and also because Chanyeol was sitting right next to him, but that was a minor detail; not really.

He was freaking out.

Being completely engrossed in whatever he was watching on his phone, Jongin didn’t look like he noticed his looming presence; or maybe he did and didn’t give a damn about it.

Sehun honestly didn’t mind either way.

The Alpha was like the only person in the launch who wasn’t remotely interested in staring him down which he was really thankful for. He hated being the center of attention. Everyone who knew him was well aware of that fact. It annoyed him that his friends and Minyoung were critically observing him like he was going to explode any moment, though he couldn’t really fault them for that. After all, they were just looking out for him.

_It would be too obvious now if I turn around…_

Cursing himself mentally, Sehun pointedly avoided Chanyeol’s heavy gaze that was trained on him ever since he came in and unconsciously let his eyes wander to take in Jongin’s appearance.

The tanned male was still dressed in the attire that he has been wearing for the ceremony and appeared to be completely comfortable in it; judging from his laid back demeanor and from the way he has rolled the sleeves up. Sehun can clearly see his defined pecs trying to chance a glance through the loose airy fabric and did not feel proud of himself when he let his gaze linger around the chest area for a second too long. His Wolf, however, for some very odious reason, was happy because it practically purred inside him.

Sehun immediately tore his gaze away in mortification.

 _What the fuck?_

“Why did you stop?” Yixing inquired with a concerned frown just in time Jongin lifted his head to look up. An unknown force seized Sehun completely when their eyes met, rendering him absolutely incapable of making any sort of the movement.

The Alpha’s eyes were a warm shade of brown – something he wasn’t able to make out from so far earlier – though the expression inside them was contrastingly cold. They were heavily fringed with long lashes and seemed to be regarding him with a slight lilt of curiosity. Sehun stood there, making a fool out of himself, for a moment or two before sharply turning around in his place with a wildly drumming heart and a mind that was ill at ease from the oddity of his own reactions.

Avoiding making eye contact with anyone, he kept his gaze on the floor and made his way towards the couch on the opposite side. It was, of course, occupied and didn’t have an empty spot for him to sit on so he conveniently settled his butt down on one of the plush arms beside the head Alpha; who shifted in his place to face give him a stern look.

“You didn’t tell me you were sick?” Suppressing the urge to just get up and run away – why the fuck was everyone looking at him? – Sehun faced the elder Alpha and smiled weakly.

“It was nothing big.”

“Nothing big? Minseok told me that you couldn’t sleep all night and he had to stay with you.” Sehun turned to face his friend as soon as he heard that.

Minseok and Baekhyun, unsurprisingly, knew of his late-night escapades. He had informed them himself because there was no point in hiding anything. They shared a special bond with him and would have eventually gotten suspicious. They might have even followed him which in his opinion was a lot more dangerous. It would have revealed his real secret to them. At least, now they knew that he went out whenever the absence of his Wolf suffocated him. They knew he _needed_ to be alone that is why they threw in random alibi for him whenever he went out just in case someone would detect his scent...like Jongin did yesterday.

_Minseok’s alibi should work._

Attempting to cast a discreet glance in Jongin’s direction, Sehun shifted in his place a little though he abandoned his plan fairly quickly when their gazes met, yet again, for a split second.

_Why is he still looking this way?_

“I am talking to you,” The head Alpha chastised him after most probably noticing how distracted he was.

“You should have told me or Minyoung. We would have called the pack doctor for you.” Minyoung was beginning to look concerned too. She might have thought that the sickness was an excuse thrown in by his friends to vindicate his absence, but Minseok’s alibi was totally uncalled for – at least to her because she knew nothing about the whole sneaking out in the night fiasco.

“I am alright.” Sehun placated weakly, once again feeling guilt grating at his conscience.

“There is nothing to worry about, seriously.”

“Are you sure? Yixing can still check-”

“I am fine, Alpha.” Sehun asserted respectfully and gave a slightly crooked smile when he noticed that the elder male still didn’t look convinced.

Kim Jaehyun, popularly addressed as the head Alpha of the Selene pack, was a nice man and an even nicer leader. Despite being a very successful ruler, he has never been anything, but humble his whole life and has always been just and kind. He felt for others and was an extremely responsible adult. Sehun would forever be thankful to the head Alpha and his mate for taking him and Chanyeol under their care after their parents had died. He didn’t know what he would have done otherwise, especially when his elder brother decided that he wanted absolutely nothing to do with him.

It was no secret that the elder male cared about his family greatly. He has always been somewhat over-protective whenever it came to the safety and health of the people of his house, _but_ he tended to be over-broad whenever it came to Sehun. The Omega knew it was because of that one particular night that none of them have been able to forget – especially him and the head Alpha – and really wished that he could take that guilt out of Minyoung and Jaehyun.

It wasn’t their fault.

  
“So…you are Sehun?” Jongdae inquired, sounding incredibly awkward, after a short moment of silence which prompted Sehun to face him with a genuinely stupefied expression.

“Is there any other person here who you haven’t seen for the past ten or so years?”

“No?” Jongdae responded with a sheepish smile.

“Well then, yes, I am Sehun,” Sehun responded blankly while seriously wondering how it was even possible for any of the guys to not remember how he looked like. Yeah, they haven’t met a lot, but he also hasn’t changed that much in the face department after puberty hit him. Moreover, there was no way Baekhyun and Minseok hadn’t shown his pictures to them.

“What the hell Jongdae?” Kyungsoo voiced out Sehun’s sentiments for him.

“We all know who Sehun is.”

“I know that too~” Jongdae whined in self-defense when he noticed that everyone was judging his sobriety at the moment.

“He just looked so closed-off and intimidating. I couldn’t find any other way to break the ice.” He continued with a scowl and turned to face Sehun who was trying his level best to suppress the entertained smile that was threatening to light up his face. The taller male really didn’t get where Jongdae was coming from, especially considering the way he has been nothing, but awkward ever since he came down.

“Sehun, you really shouldn’t look at me like that.”

“Like what?”

“Like you think I am stupid.” The corner of Sehun’s lips twitched up in amusement.

“I don’t think you are stupid.”

“You sure don’t look like it.” The whiny Alpha grumbled under his breath.

“I recall that you used to be pretty smart.” That compliment seemed to have breathed life back into Jongdae because he perked up right away. It was almost funny. How his eyes gleamed so brightly all of a sudden.

“You remember me?”

“Fortunately, I haven’t been afflicted with Amnesia, yet,” Sehun commented dryly which earned him a few snickers from the others.

“I detect sarcasm-”

“You are stupid, Dae. Sehun is just too nice to say that to your face.” Minseok cut his elder brother off with a snort.

“I am your elder brother!” Jongdae protested in a heated manner before turning to face his mother.

“Mom, they used to be sweet kids. What have you done to them?” A laugh finally bubbled past Sehun’s lips before he could even think about stopping it.

_He is still the same._

It was true.

Jongdae did seem like he hadn’t changed at all. He was still as whiny, loud, funny and friendly as he used to be. His eyes still crinkled at the corners when he smiled. He still has those insanely sharp cheekbones. His lips still curled at the corners and he still resembled a Cat more than a Wolf.

He retained all those qualities that Sehun used to admire in him when they were kids and the Omega was really thankful for that.

Jongdae was, after all, one of the guys he was the closest to back then.

“Won’t you talk to your brother?” Sehun’s laughter died down the moment he heard that question.

“He has been looking at you,” The head Alpha plowed on when he got no response.

Fidgeting with his hands, Sehun stole his gaze away from the elder male and stared up at Minyoung, in hopes she would be able to divert the crisis, but sadly, she was still busy laughing at whatever Jongdae has said next. He did not want to spoil her happy moment despite the fact she has promised to help him out of _this_ very situation earlier in the morning.

“Why are you asking me that?” Sehun hated the way his voice came out sounding more like a plea than a question, but he didn’t really want to talk to Chanyeol, especially not in front of everyone. If Jaehyun asked him to do that now, he knew he would find it hard to refuse.

“You know why, Sehun.”

“Don’t make me, Alpha.”

“You can’t avoid this forever, kid.” The head Alpha reprimanded though his voice lacked the usual conviction.

“Let me avoid this for as long as I can then.” Sehun really wasn’t going to give in to this one.

“Please.”

“This won’t solve anything. He is going to live here from now on.”

“I will stay out of his way.”

“Sehun-”

“What are you two whispering about?” Startled, Sehun jerked a bit in his place before facing Junmyeon who was looking at them curiously.

“Nothing special. I was just nagging him for not taking care of his health.” Jaehyun lied smoothly which kind of made him feel envious.

_I wish I was able to lie so effortlessly._

Letting out a dejected sigh, Sehun tuned out the conversation going on around him and instead looked down at his hands. He didn’t mean to be the kill-joy. He really didn’t. He wanted everyone to be happy which is why to know that he was the reason why Jaehyun and Minyoung couldn’t even properly enjoy the return of their sons was making him feel awful.

_Why do I have to be such an emotional mess?_

What was there to make a big deal out of? It was just a freaking greeting. He can easily do it and get over with it. Minyoung wanted him to do that. The head Alpha expected him to do the same. Minseok and Baekhyun urged him in the morning to do that too and really what was so difficult about it? Was it his pride? His ego? His stubbornness? Or was it his fear of what will happen next if he did make a move to start a conversation? Will Chanyeol talk to him or will he ignore him like all those times before? Will _he_ talk to his brother if Chanyeol took the initiative?

_No._

He really wouldn’t.

His brother has thrown him out of his life without even giving him a proper reason. He wouldn’t just let him waltz back in as if nothing has happened; as if there wasn’t a distance of more than nineteen years between them.

They were too far apart now.

_But isn’t it selfish of me?_

It was. Nobody showed it, but he knew everyone in the launch was aware of the suffocating tension that presided between him and Chanyeol. Sehun knew that they were worried. He knew that he was spoiling the mood and he also knew what Jaehyun said was fairly accurate. There was no way to avoid this forever. They were going to live in the same house. He might ignore his brother for the sake of his own petty pride, but at the end of the day, people in the house would suffer.

_It is not like he wants to bridge the gap between us anyway…_

That too was a fact. There was no point in getting ahead of himself. Chanyeol most probably still didn’t want to see his face and Sehun was okay with that. He didn’t want to have anything to do with him too. He was done being the naïve child who waited for his brother despite all his harsh words and gestures. He was done giving a fuck about Chanyeol.

_Why does it hurt so much then?_

That was the question he was afraid to find an answer for. Maybe, somewhere deep inside, he was aware of _why_. He knew all the reasons too well and was afraid that by bringing them to the surface he would make them too concrete, too real, and he didn’t want to do that. If they became real then all the walls that he has built around himself would crumble. He would crumble, yet again.

_I don’t care about him._

Sehun tried to convince himself as a profound feeling of despair started to slowly mount up inside him. He restlessly drummed his fingers against his legs and tried to focus on whatever was going on around him, but the tight, painful grip on his heart didn’t let up.

_I really don’t._

There was nothing to care about anyway, not when his brother has broken the promise.

_“Chanyeol,” Sehun’s three years old self had mindlessly called out for his brother who was sitting at the studying table with a book in his hand._

_“What is it now, Sehunnie?” His brother had responded immediately with fond exasperation._

_“I have a question.”_

_“You always have one.” Ignoring the jab, Sehun had climbed off his bed to walk closer to the elder male._

_“Why do adults care so much about the Blue Moon?” His brother was six at that time. Sehun’s younger-self had always treated him like a personal encyclopedia because the elder male always had an answer for his questions and he had answered them so nicely too._

_“It is a very special day.”_

_“What is so special? It comes once every year.”_

_“That is what makes it so special, silly. It comes only once a year.” Chanyeol had clarified with a chuckle before placing down the book in his hand and patting his leg. Sehun had been happy to climb up into his brother’s lap._

_He used to pamper him so much._

_“Dad told me that on 16 th of every November the Moon turns Blue because the Moon Goddess comes down to the Earth to bless us with our Wolves.”_

_“Why didn’t she bless you and me then? I want to play Wolf too.”_

_“You have to be eighteen years old for that.” Sehun had frowned at that._

_“But why? I want it now?” Chanyeol had pinched his left cheek at that._

_“Think of it as a special present. Every eighteen years old on the night of Blue Moon gets their Omega, Alpha or the Beta as a present and a week later they are able to shift.” His brother had broken-off there with a wince._

_“I have heard it hurts.”_

_“I don’t want to get hurt. It makes me cry.” Sehun had objected innocently before turning around in his brother’s hold._

_“I want my Wolf too.”_

_“Don’t worry, Sehunnie. You trust me, right? I will protect you and make the pain go away.” Oh, how badly had Sehun held onto those words?_

_“Yes! I will protect you too.” Chanyeol had once again laughed at that._

_“Sure thing, kid. That’s a promise then. Don’t break it.”_

It was ironic how Chanyeol was the one who had broken that promise and by doing so have consequently ruined Sehun’s life.

For fourteen years (it was a long time), Sehun had hoped to reconcile with his brother. For fourteen years, he hadn’t lost faith in Chanyeol, but the night he had shifted changed everything; the night he had needed his brother’s protection the most, but the elder male hadn’t been there. He hadn’t come because he was too busy punishing Sehun for something that he still wasn’t aware of.

_I won’t forgive him._

With his resolve once again steeled in its place, Sehun pushed down the nostalgia that was making him tender from inside and defiantly turned to face his brother.

_Why is he even staring at me now when all his life he had treated me like an eye-sore?_

Chanyeol looked like he was caught off-guard from their sudden eye contact because his naturally wide eyes, widened further. Sehun curbed the urge to roll his eyes and continued to listlessly stare at his brother whose gaze for once wasn’t indifferent. It wasn’t hostile and after a life-time, it didn’t make Sehun feel like he was the most insignificant thing in the world. There was something about the expression in them which reached out to him. It told him that the elder male had so much to say and was asking for a chance.

Sehun scoffed under his breath.

_Here I go, deluding myself again._

Feeling bitter, he looked away from his brother and swiped his sweaty palms on the front of his jeans, contemplating whether he should leave now or not.

_I have spent enough time here._

Maybe that was a lie he told to convince himself, but at that moment he really wanted to be alone so that he could wallow in self-pity peacefully. Deciding that there really was no point in staying (he wasn’t even paying attention to anyone around him) he slowly got up and turned to face Minyoung who to his luck caught his gaze right away. Something akin to concern crossed her expression which told Sehun that he wasn’t as discreet about his emotions as he thought himself to be.

“I will catch up on that missed sleep now.” He excused himself with a barely-there smile.

“Join you at dinner?”

“Yeah, sure,” Minyoung responded reluctantly after a moment of silence.

“Let me know if you need anything.” Sehun’s smile grew a little at that. He knew it was her way of telling him that she would be there for him if he wanted to vent his emotions out.

“I will.” He assured with a nod before swiftly whirling around in his place.

He just wanted to get as far away as it was possible from the sitting area. He wanted to find an escape in the safety of his room where there was no Chanyeol to make him feel bad about himself or where there was no Jongin whom he needed to be cautious of. He wanted to get rid of that constant anxiety; that persistent need to simply run away.

“Oh, hey!” An excited voice suddenly called out for his attention, making him jerkily halt in his steps.

“You must be Sehun, right?” The male in question stared at the petite Omega in front of him in confusion for a second before he finally realized who it actually was.

“I am Minji. Your brother’s-”

“Mate. I know.” Sehun completed for her politely before hesitantly taking the hand that she has stretched out.

“It is so nice to meet you at long last.” Minji expressed with a smile before giving his shoulder a friendly pat which honestly confused him beyond belief.

_Why is she being so nice to me?_

_Her mate practically hates me._

“It is nice to meet you too.” He responded gawkily while nervously rubbing the back of his neck.

Sehun has always been awkward around strangers so it was no wonder that he currently has no idea how he was supposed to interact with her. This was the first time ever they were meeting. Adding to that she was pregnant as well which put him in a sort of dilemma. Was he supposed to ignore the news or at least congratulate her? There was no way he was going to talk to Chanyeol so that was the best way of acknowledging the existence of his future niece or nephew. No matter how bitter he was towards his brother, the pup was going to be related to him through the blood.

Sehun can’t help, but be at least a little excited about him or her.

“I have been telling Chanyeol to call you to meet us for so long.” Minji continued as if she couldn’t notice just how uncomfortable he was.

“I mean, he makes fun of me so much. I wanted to get some dirt on him too and who better than his younger brother?” She ended her sentence with a playful wiggle of her brows.

_Damn, she talks a lot._

_No wonder Chanyeol likes her._

_Their personality match so well._

“Don’t you agree with me?” Sehun nodded his head in a non-committal manner at her urging.

“Yeah, sure.”

“You should tell me what kind of a brother Chanyeol is? I have always been curious, especially now since we are becoming parents.” Was she really that oblivious to his discomfort or was she deliberately ignoring it?

“He for sure is one of a kind,” Sehun remarked cynically.

_I hope he won’t treat his pup the way he treated me._

“That good?” Minji teased with a smirk which almost – _almost –_ prompted him to snort.

“You have no idea,” His curt response seemed to have finally made her uncomfortable because her happy mood dimmed a little.

Sehun cursed himself mentally and tried his best to make his expression a little more welcoming. Whatever Chanyeol did was not her fault. He has no right to treat her in an inhospitable way, especially when she has been so nice and friendly to him.

“A-Anyways,” She started again, looking a bit uncertain.

“I was so sad that you couldn’t make it to our mating ceremony last year with the others. You were, after all, Chanyeol’s only blood relation and I wanted to meet you so bad.” Sehun gave her a tight-lipped smile as a response. He was surprised that Chanyeol even bothered to inform Minji about his existence. Actually, he was sure that it was one of the other guys who might have spilled the beans.

“I am not complaining though. Chanyeol told me you were really busy with your studies and couldn’t make it, so I understand. Medical can be very tough.” Resentment filled Sehun to the brim the second his mind registered those words.

_I couldn’t make it?_

He was so damn tempted to face his brother now.

He wanted to demand whether Chanyeol hadn’t been the one to tell Minyoung not to bring Sehun over the call because it was supposed to be a happy day and he didn’t want any sort of unpleasantness. As if Sehun was some kind of a bad omen or a nuisance that would have soured his brother’s happy day just by being there. More humiliating was the fact that Sehun had been genuinely happy for his brother (despite the fact that he wasn’t ready to forgive him) and like a fool he had been ready to travel to the mountains to attend the ceremony. He would have attended it if he hadn’t overheard that call.

He still remembered the embarrassment that he had felt at that time.

_Lying bastard._

_He can’t even be honest with his mate._

“He really missed you that day.” Sehun stiffly nodded his head at that and threw a cursory glance towards his brother.

“I am sure he did miss me a lot.” He drawled before shifting in his place a little; feeling impatient to just walk out of the launch once again.

“Before I forget, congratulations. I hope you and the pup will stay healthy.” Minji gave him a brilliant smile upon hearing that.

“Thanks a lot! I am sure you will be a great uncle.”

“I hope so.” Sehun agreed with a small, but a genuine smile of his own and side-stepped her figure.

“I will see you at dinner.”

“You are leaving?”

“Yeah, I have a headache so I was thinking of resting my head for a while” Minji mutely nodded her head at that. Seeing that the conversation was finished, Sehun tipped his head at her slightly before hastily making his way towards the stairs.

_Finally._

“Your brother is so pretty, Chanyeol.” He heard Minji commenting while he was half-way up.

“Isn’t he?” Baekhyun’s excited voice joined in.

“You don’t even want to know how many admirers he has in our University.”

“I can imagine. He looks like one of those super popular flower boys.” Sehun shook his head with a breathy chuckle. Minji really was a lot like his brother.

She even talked like him.

“He is!”

_This is going to be a long discussion._

* * *

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	4. Chapter 4

Chapter #4

Sehun wanted to think that the things at night went smoothly, but that would be a blatant lie.

To start with, he had been fifteen minutes late to the dinner because he had spent way too much time trying to convince himself to join everyone. He really wouldn’t have joined (especially when he felt so angry at his brother) if he hadn’t told Minyoung that he would and if he hadn’t known that his absence at the table would raise unnecessary fuss. Minji knew nothing about whatever was going on between him and Chanyeol. He wanted to keep it that way for as long as he could.

If his late attendance wasn’t enough, he had deliberately ignored the empty chair next to his brother and have opted to sit beside Kyungsoo who, even though, didn’t seem to mind his presence still grew visibly awkward. Minji, unfortunately as he had expected, had been quick to question him about his choice and Sehun’s lack of reasonable answer had just further worsened the things. Baekhyun and Jongdae did try their best to keep the atmosphere lively, but that hadn’t worked out as well as everyone at the table had wished for it to.

_This can’t go on forever._

It was true.

He was already feeling bad enough for totally ruining the mood at the dinner. Whatever the issues were between him and Chanyeol, the rest of the people in the house did not deserve to go through such painfully, awkward meals all the time. He and Chanyeol cannot be in one place – at least for the sanity of the people around them.

“This is such a mess…” Sehun grumbled under his breath before sleepily trudging towards the countertop. He placed the glass of water in his hand on the marble slab before unceremoniously settling his butt down on one of the high chairs.

His Wolf has been so freaking restless ever since the morning. He hasn’t paid much attention to it before, but now it wasn’t even letting him sleep which kind of sucked because he was pretty damn sleepy at the moment. Moreover, this has never happened before, especially not right after the night he has indulged the beast inside him.

_Good, Lord!_

Normally, one night of sneaking outlasted him at least two weeks, but this time around the stupid Omega inside him seemed especially adamant on making his life a living hell. The most frustrating part was the fact that he didn’t even know _why_ his Wolf was acting up. It could be because he, himself, had been tense the whole day today, but that never seemed to have an impact on his Wolf before…so why now?

Letting out a low groan, Sehun buried his head in his hands.

_There is no way I can sneak out today._

It was too dangerous, especially when Jongin had almost caught him yesterday.

_He just won’t forget it._

It wasn’t that simple or easy. He wouldn’t have hidden his identity for almost five years now if it was.

_I wonder what he is planning on doing about it._

There was a chance, Jongin would have left the matter alone (not really) if he hadn’t spotted the White Wolf in Selene’s terrain. He was going to be the head Alpha of their pack soon. Sehun was sure seeing a White Wolf in his own territory had worried him to at least some extent.

After all, packs after packs have been destroyed by hungry Wolves – specifically Rogues – just because they wanted to get their hands on Sehun’s kind. They lusted after power and would do anything to get their hands on the sacred source of it.

The thought of it alone made him shudder in fear–

Sehun straightened up in his place suddenly when he caught whiff of unfamiliar sharp, pungent pheromones and stuck his nose out to take in the scent a little better. It had an earthy musk mixed with the mellow undertones of mint – that much he was sure of – and something peculiar (maybe ground coffee beans?) though he wasn’t really able to decipher it properly; especially not when he was too busy wondering why his Wolf strangely went so still inside him.

_It must be the fear._

He tried to convince himself in vain and reluctantly turned to face the entrance of the kitchen just in time Kim Jongin stepped inside.

_Of course, it is him._

The first thing that Sehun noticed about him was the serious lack of decent clothing. The other male was only wearing grey pants that hung dangerously low on his hips and outlined the stature of his long and lean legs. The upper-half of his – _very_ defined – body was conveniently left bare for the whole world to behold and it seemed like Jongin had no qualms about it because he casually walked towards the refrigerator; completely ignoring Sehun’s presence.

The second thing that he became conscious of was the fresh smell of the woods that clung to the other male which consequently brought him to the third realization.

_He was out in the woods looking for the White Wolf._

Sehun felt his body knocking up in apprehension right away.

Now, there was a possibility that he was being too paranoid, but the fact that Jongin has gone alone into the dense and vast forest in the wee hours of the night without even informing anyone spoke volumes and made him almost certain of his intentions.

“You know,” A pleasantly deep voice, which seeped into his ears like warm, sweet honey, startled him out of his very _unpleasant_ reverie.

“People would have called it harassment if it was the other way around.”

“E-Excuse me?” Sehun stuttered out distractedly and furrowed his brows in confusion when the other male turned to face him properly.

“You shouldn’t be so obvious while checking someone out.” Jongin clarified while nonchalantly leaning against one of the counters.

“I was not checking you out!”

_What the hell is he talking about?_

“Yeah, and I didn’t just spend the last nine or so years of my life in the Mountains.” Sehun found himself scowling at that.

“Listen, I know you think you are some hot-shot Alpha that every Omega wants-”

“I think?” Jongin challenged with a smirk.

_So damn conceited._

“Trust me,” Sehun started again with a grimace.

“Not every Omega is attracted to you.”

“Especially not you?” The tanned male guessed with an airy chuckle.

“Definitely not me,” Sehun affirmed in a heated manner before crossing his arms over his chest.

“…because you think you are too good for that?” Jongin continued which once again confused him.

“What?”

“Am I wrong?” The other male challenged with a ticked brow.

“Don’t you think you are way too good for all of us?”

“I don’t!” Sehun denied defensively.

“If you have kept your ears open, you would have known that I was sick.”

“You weren’t sick at night.” Jongin pointed out apathetically.

“The only reason I avoid-”

“So you do admit that you avoided us?” Sehun growled in irritation at being cut off like that.

“Not that I care.” The tanned male continued with the shrug of his shoulders while being pointedly ( _mockingly_ ) oblivious to his anger.

“I am not trying to avoid any of you. The only person I don’t want to talk to is-”

“Chanyeol.” Sehun snapped his mouth shut when Jongin completed his sentence for him.

“I know,” The Alpha continued before thoughtfully straightening up in his place.

“You don’t want to talk to Chanyeol and Chanyeol doesn’t want to talk to you. What’s the problem then? No one is forcing you to. Why create such a big deal out of it? You can’t stay bitter about it your whole life.” Those words stung Sehun straight in his heart.

“You don’t know anything.” He gritted out before jumping off the high chair. He was no longer willing to deal with Jongin’s bullshit.

“I know enough,” The tanned male contradicted firmly before slightly tipping his head to the side.

“Whatever it is between you and your brother is ruining the atmosphere of the house. My parents weren’t even able to celebrate properly today because they were too busy being worried over you. No one was happy.” Jongin broke off with a frown.

“Things can’t keep on going like this. Get over it or I don’t know just don’t come down until you are sure you can control your emotions.” Overpowering the rage simmering under his skin, Sehun schooled his expression into the one of indifference and carelessly walked up to the other male until he was standing within the Alpha’s personal space, boldly.

“I will keep that in mind,” He assured with a crooked smile before pointing down with his finger.

“Meanwhile, you should zip your pants up.” It was funny how fast Jongin’s nonchalant façade broke away to give way to surprise and perhaps a little embarrassment. Smirking to himself in victory, Sehun scoffed under his breath before stepping past the other’s figure to make his way out.

“You think you are too smart, don’t you?” Jongin called out just before he could step out.

“ _I think?_ ” Sehun mocked with a smirk before turning around and waving a hand over his shoulder in dismissal.

“Good night.”

* * *

“Sehunnie~” Sehun blinked his sleepy eyes open slightly when he heard someone calling his name for the nth time and turned away with a grumpy whine when he saw that it was Minyoung.

“Leave me alone.”

“It is almost lunchtime.” She informed him with a huff before playfully ruffling his hairs.

“Why are you even sleeping out here in the launch?”

_Out in the launch…?_

Cracking his eyes open again, Sehun squinted at the soft fur he was currently lying down on and frowned.

“I was reading a book.” He provided intelligently and looked back at Minyoung when she softly brushed back the loose bangs from his forehead.

“Are you alright?” The concern in her voice confused him a little.

“Yeah, why would you think I am not?” He inquired while sluggishly sitting up in his place.

It has been such a nice, peaceful and slow day.

The sky looked so damn pretty. Its blue color was soft and bright at the same time. The white clouds, almost resembling white smoke, slowly sailed by carried on the gentle waves of the cool breeze that has sweetly kissed his skin as soon as he has stepped outside his room. The effervescent sun high up in the sky has been shining so magnificently on one of the furs placed by the balcony in the launch that Sehun hadn’t been able to deny himself the pleasure of a good read in such an enlivened atmosphere.

“You don’t usually take mid-day naps.” Minyoung pointed out with a small smile.

“I was up till late, yesterday.”

“I know,” She revealed before shifting in her place to be more comfortable.

“You don’t usually stay up till late either.” Sehun turned to face her once again with his lips pressed in a thin line.

Of course, she knew.

Who was he even trying to kid?

_The Blue Moon’s approaching._

Minyoung knew that too.

Realistically, there was a whole month left, but before this, his Wolf has never grown restless until the last two weeks which led up to the Blue Moon. It worried Sehun a lot and he knew it worried Minyoung too because the concern on her face grew.

Blue Moon was a happy day, but not for Sehun.

Selene supposedly visited the Earth each year on Blue Moon and blessed them with their Wolves. The ones who have been already blessed answered to the call of the Moon and made a run in the forest. It’s one of their peak instincts and Sehun knew his Wolf couldn’t help it when he fought against him viciously and deliberately hurt him as if it was in a drunken haze. The powerful urge to just shift and run out to the woods with the others was too strong. He couldn’t really blame the animal prisoned inside himself for going wild.

For the past four years, Sehun had trumped over the beast and have managed to keep himself from shifting – he couldn’t shift in the packhouse, especially when a Wolf nose is extremely sensitive during the Blue Moon – and of course, from running out in the woods to answer that damned call from the Goddess.

The people in the packhouse didn’t know a lot about what he did after locking himself up inside a room though he was sure that they thought it had to do something with the absence of his Wolf. They had no idea that each year, Sehun spent hours after hours fighting with his Wolf.

It has never been easy. It has always hurt him so bad and with each passing year the animal inside him has gotten crueler. Last year, Sehun had spit out blood and the sheer amount of pain that he had felt had convinced him that it was his end. Fortunately, he had woken up a few days later, feeling rotten as hell, but still alive.

He knew that Minyoung was afraid something like that would happen again and truth be told, he was too.

He was freaking terrified.

“I have been feeling a little restless, that’s it,” Sehun replied belatedly.

“Nothing to worry about.”

“I see,” She clearly wasn’t convinced. It was obvious from her face, but for some odd reason she didn’t voice her doubts. He looked at her with a brow ticked in wonder – Minyoung wasn’t the one to shy away from expressing herself, especially when it came to his health – before finally becoming aware of the foreign scents around him.

Snapping his head to the left, he came face-to-face with Jongdae who waved at him with an easy smile. Behind him stood, Jongin with his hand tucked inside his pants pockets and further back lingered Chanyeol.

_What are they doing here?_

Considering that there were unmated Omegas and Alphas in the house, the second floor was given specifically to him, Minseok and Baekhyun. His brother with his mate – maybe Lay and Junmyeon too, he wasn’t sure about that – have gotten one of the rooms on the first floor whereas the rest of the guys were assigned rooms on the third floor.

Even though it wasn’t forbidden, still no one really visited the floor they stayed in because of things like…well, heats. Besides that, Minseok and Baekhyun spent most of their time with the others on the third or the first floor so this was basically the first time.

Then again, it has been only three days since they came.

_They must be waiting for Minyoung._

“Hello, there stranger.” Jongdae spoke up when he failed to greet them.

“It has been two days since we last got to see you.”

“I am sorry,” Sehun responded with an embarrassed lilt to his voice before actually remembering _why_ he was isolating himself like that in the first place. Scowling to himself, he raised his head up to glare at Jongin. The other male met his gaze blankly for a second or two, his eyes essentially looking as cold as ice, before pursing his lips.

“How can you even stay holed-up in your room for two days straight?” Jongdae demanded with a grimace and curiously tilted his head to the left to look at his brother. He turned back towards Sehun a moment later and repeated that movement of his eyes twice more before finally settling down with a frown.

“I just really like keeping to myself,” Sehun responded with the shrug of his shoulders before facing Minyoung – she has been oddly quiet – once again.

“You guys should go down.” She suggested all of a sudden and turned toward her son with a small smile.

“I will join you in five minutes.”

“Sure,” Jongdae responded nonchalantly before getting up to leave. Sehun watched in tense silence as they moved towards the stairs and abruptly faced Minyoung again when she spoke.

“You were reading about the White Wolf?” He practically felt Jongin freezing in his steps before he detected his motionless form in his peripheral vision.

“It is Minseok’s!” It was not, but Minyoung and most importantly Jongin didn’t know that.

“I mean, he was the one reading it before I fell asleep.”

“Oh,” Minyoung responded, appearing a bit weirded out though thankfully she said nothing.

“Sehun, is something wrong?”

“Everything’s fine,” Sehun assured her with a crooked smile and sagged in relief when he saw Jongin walking down the stairs.

_That was close._

“Everything doesn’t seem fine to me.” She countered firmly before hesitantly continuing.

“It’s the Blue Moon, right?”

“Minyoung-”

“I think you should go to Dr. Lee before anything happens. I don’t want the repeat of the last time. Sehun for heaven’s sake!” There was so much anxiety in her words that it startled him into silence for a little while.

“I am fine.”

“Y-You are not. I am not blind. You get restless-”

“You worry too much,” Sehun deflected hastily before letting out a fond chuckle.

“There is still a whole month left. I am feeling restless because I am not used to so many people in the house that’s it. Plus, you know…Chanyeol.” That seemed to have convinced her, even though it was just by a fraction.

“I know, you don’t want to talk to him, Sehun,” Minyoung started wearily again and patted his cheek.

“You don’t have to, but at least talk to the others. Jongdae has been so excited to rekindle the friendship that you guys used to have. Your avoidance have disappointed him greatly.”

“But I-”

“Think about Baekhyun and Minseok, at least. They would be happy to have you roaming around the house with them like you used to do before. Nothing has changed…” She broke off and reached out to hold his hand.

“Please, don’t do this. Don’t isolate yourself.”

“I-I am not.” He wasn’t exactly fond of the idea of telling her that her own son was the one who told him to just stay away if he can’t stop himself from being emotional.

“You are, Sehun and it hurts me. I want you to enjoy. I want you to be happy with others. If you must, then do it for me.”

“You won’t let me off the hook this time, would you?” He knew that the moment she decided to stay behind.

“Hmm…” She acknowledged with a hum before getting up and playfully pulling on his ear.

“I want you down with everyone else in the next ten minutes.”

“I will come down-”

“You will come down, now. No space for arguments.” Sehun scowled at that even though he knew she was doing it to lighten up the mood.

“Bossy.”

“Be at lunch with everyone in ten minutes like I said or else…”

“Or else?”

“I will lock you in a room with Chanyeol.” Knowing Minyoung, that threat wasn’t a false call.

“Ten minutes. I will be down.”

* * *

It wasn’t after ten minutes – it was at night time actually – but Sehun went down all the same. Everyone was already done with the dinner, it seemed, because no one was there when he entered the dining area located at the left of the open patio. Shrugging his shoulders, he made his way towards the Kitchen (it was right next to dining area) and helped himself to a plate full of the Spaghettis. He has heard from Minseok earlier that Kyungsoo was the one who made it which was pretty impressive because he was an Alpha and stereotypically they were too proud to make themselves useful in the Kitchen. Sehun has always hated the typecast Alphas which was why his respect for Kyungsoo grew immensely.

_Why would you even associate a simple activity with a specific gender?_

Scooping up a spoonful into his mouth and marveling at the taste, he wondered whether he should just sit in the dining area and finish his food, but in the end, grudgingly decided against it. Minyoung was really going to kill him if he at least didn’t make a five-minute-long interaction with someone that wasn’t her, Jaehyun, Baekhyun and Minseok. Plus, he was a bit tired of being alone too. His friends did come to spend time with him, but they have been busy – rightfully so – which meant that he was by himself most of the time for the past two days.

“Look who came down,” Kyungsoo commented with a teasing grin as soon as Sehun entered the sitting area.

“You should thank me for that.” Jongdae instantly jumped in.

“I made him feel bad. That’s why he is here.” Deciding that there was no use getting offended over it or feeling bad, Sehun shrugged his shoulders and casually walked inside to sit beside Jongdae – much to the other male’s surprise.

“Don’t be too confident about that.” He remarked before putting another spoonful inside his mouth. There weren’t a lot of people present there. Beside, Jongdae and Kyungsoo, Baekhyun and Minyoung were the only ones in the patio.

_I wonder where the others are…_

It wasn’t like he minded their absence.

_Now I just need to get out of here before either Jongin or Chanyeol show up._

“Yeah, don’t be.” Baekhyun agreed with a snort.

“With how stubborn he is, I am sure Minyoung threatened him with something.”

“Hey!” Minyoung deflected with a mischievous smile before turning to face Sehun.

“I would never threaten him.” He couldn’t help, but scoff at that.

“Whoever said that you’re sleek was lying to you.” The taller male deadpanned after swallowing the bite in his mouth and let out a startled yelp when she pushed at his shoulder in protest.

“Brat!”

“I almost tipped the plate over!” He complained indignantly and looked down at his lap where a few strands of spaghetti (coated in red sauce) has fallen.

_Why did I wear white today?_

Sehun bemoaned mentally before putting aside his plate and picking up the noodles. He was about to place them on the table, so that he can clean up later, when Baekhyun reached out and plucked them away from his fingers.

_Did he just eat them?_

“What?” Baekhyun questioned when he noticed the look of revulsion on his face.

“That was a waste of food.”

“What you did was disgusting and completely unhygienic.” Sehun countered with a grimace and picked his plate back up.

“I second that.” Kyungsoo agreed with a frown.

“Aww, Soo,” Baekhyun started with that sinister glint in his eyes and scooched closer to the Alpha with his slightly dirty, sauce-covered fingers.

“Stay away from me,” Kyungsoo warned while cautiously eyeing those fingers with mild disgust.

“I swear to Selene, Baekhyun. I will kill you!”

“Now, now let’s not involve-”

“Baekhyun, are you being a pest again?” Minseok inquired in a blasé manner as soon as he walked in.

“Why don’t you just let Kyungsoo be?”

“Have you seen his face when he gets annoyed at me?” Baekhyun defended himself with a cackle and eventually settled back in his place much to Kyungsoo’s relief.

“I don’t know whether to call you a sadist or a masochist,” Sehun commented with an amused snort and turned to face the corridor on the left just in time Minji stepped out with Chanyeol and Yixing. Now, he would have gotten up and escaped – especially when he saw Jongin, busy on a call, trailing behind them – only if he hadn’t noticed the pain on her face.

“Are you alright?” Sehun didn’t realize he has voiced that question out loud until he made a proper eye-contact with his brother, who looked pleasantly surprised.

“I am. Don’t worry.” Minji replied with a small smile (which was more of a wince) and sat down beside Minyoung.

“I think I moved the wrong way while taking the nap. It hurts a little now,” It didn’t seem like it hurt just a little though he decided to keep that observation to himself.

“It might be due to exhaustion too.” Yixing further elaborated with a frown.

“The journey here was long. It is normal for it to take a toll on your body.”

“I talked to Dr. Kang,” Jongin broke-in, all of a sudden, before anyone else can speak up.

“He says that they do have the herb, but it’s in the inventory of the crime control unit and there is no one to deliver it at the moment. They would send it to us in the morning.” Yixing’s frown deepened at that.

“We will have to go get it ourselves then, I guess. I am surprised that they even have that herb here. Illorage doesn’t grow here. Most of the time, it has to be imported on-demand.”

“Can’t you give her some medicine, instead?” Minyoung inquired in concern and ran her hand down Minji’s back.

“She is in obvious pain.”

“The painkillers aren’t suiting her body. She had an almost allergic reaction to the one the doctor ascribed her before and the ones with lowered potency doesn’t seem to be working too well. A very small amount of Illorage helps a lot and it isn’t dangerous. Her gynecologist prescribed it to her.” Yixing explained before turning towards Minseok.

“You guys know where the main medical center of the crime control unit is, right?”

_Oh- right._

_They don’t know this place at all._

It wasn’t a surprise. The guys have been away from the town for more than half of their lives and in the years they have been absent, the town of Aria has modernized a lot. Moreover, they have been at the packhouse mostly ever since they came back because the previous leaders were slowly trying to shift their duties to them. It wasn’t an easy process and was most probably tiresome considering the fact that they had so little time; a month to be precise. On the day of the Blue Moon, with the blessing of the Selene, they would be officially initiated as the new leaders of the pack.

_It reminds me that the University starts again on Monday._

They have gotten a full-week off in celebration of the return of the soon-to-be leaders…or maybe it was because of all the paperwork that their institution has to handle; Sehun wasn’t really sure what the reason was.

Jongin, Kyungsoo, and Jongdae were majoring in Business and Finance. In light of the strain that they experienced from the demanding training, Jongin has taken a year off from studies whereas Jongdae and Kyungsoo had taken off two which was why all of them were still in fourth (last) year of their studies. It meant that a transfer was in order, but he doubted that their University needed to close the whole institute for something that was already _planned_ ahead.

“Crime control unit?” Jongdae repeated incredulously.

“Why can’t it be at the normal hospital?”

“Illorage is a very strong painkiller and is mostly used for special cases only, Dae. You can’t find it in stores or shops. It has to be prescribed by the doctors and well, most of the times it is found in crime control units for the obvious reasons.” Yixing replied patiently, as if he was talking to a child, before turning to Minseok again with a small smile.

“Well?”

“You need authorized permission to enter the center.” Minseok responded after a short moment.

“Sehun and Baekhyun most probably can go there since Dr. Lee is their mentor for the clinical rotations.”

“Dr. Lee didn’t allow us in there.” Sehun corrected almost instantly.

“He said it is too dangerous for us.”

“Ah- it is.” Yixing agreed with an understanding nod.

“I wasn’t allowed to step anywhere near the crime unit until I was in the second year of my residency.”

“It makes sense…” Sehun acknowledged though he trailed off in the end when he noticed just how worried his brother looked. He hated it; the pang that he felt in his heart. He didn’t want to feel anything for the other (not even hate), but for some reason, he still wanted to do something to wipe that look off. He wanted to comfort the elder male. No matter how much Sehun resented him, he still wanted to make Chanyeol feel better.

_Dr. Lee can most probably do something._

He wasn’t doing it for his brother. At least, that was what he told himself.

_Minji is in pain._

She didn’t deserve it. The baby was his blood-relation. He has some duty towards it.

_That is the only reason why I am doing this._

“Do you think Dr. Lee would be at the center right now?” Sehun questioned Baekhyun before he can have any second thoughts.

“Most probably,” Baekhyun answered with a slightly contemplative expression on his face before suddenly brightening up.

“You can ask him for help.”

“Med-school mentors are not exactly known for giving favors.” Yixing pointed out, a bit drily, which only made Baekhyun grin.

“Yeah, but Sehunnie is Dr. Lee’s favorite student.” Yixing ticked a brow at that before giving an impressed nod a moment later.

“Sehun must be really good then.”

“He is!”

“I am not.” Sehun contradicted blankly before clearing his throat.

“Do you have the prescription? I would need that.”

“Here,” Chanyeol suddenly stepped forward and extended a flimsy piece of paper in his direction. Sehun wordlessly stared at his hand for a second or two – a part of him wanted to swat that away so bad – before finally taking the prescription.

“You want to come with me, Baek?”

“Yeah, just let me grab coats for us.” They didn’t really need the coats, but Sehun knew Minyoung would fuss over them if they didn’t cover themselves up before going out into the cold night.

“I will be outside.”

* * *

Thanks a lot for reading! Let me know in the comments what you think of the story, please! It encourages me to write more xD

Kudos are appreciated.

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Twitter: [@exosangel7](https://twitter.com/exosangel7)

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	5. Chapter 5

CHAPTER #5

Much to Sehun’s luck, Dr. Lee did agree to help them (quite easily, actually), provided that they show him the prescription which he had been smart enough to ask for before leaving. It had taken them at least ten minutes with the paperwork and then another ten for the herb to be fetched out of the inventory, but ultimately, after almost half-an-hour he and Baekhyun had been ready to head back home. They would have left as soon as they got their hands on what they wanted if Dr. Lee hadn’t asked them to stay behind for a while – apparently he wanted to talk to them about something – before disappearing behind the huge, automatic metal doors which most probably led to the restricted area.

After waiting for about five-minutes, Sehun had encouraged Baekhyun to go ahead with the herb because (1) Minji was in pain and she most probably would appreciate it if they could get it to her fast and (2) because Baekhyun can easily shift into his Wolf and get to the packhouse in no time. Sehun, on the other hand, was a lot better when it came to listening to someone attentively and remembering all the details so it was decided that he would stay back to listen to whatever Dr. Lee had to say.

“Ah-” Sehun bumped straight into a solid chest the moment he stepped past the main entrance door of the packhouse.

“Fuck!” He whimpered under his breath and brought up a hand to cradle his burning nose.

_Feels like a freaking brick wall._

“Of course,” A deep voice scoffed, somewhere from the front, which prompted Sehun to raise his slightly teary eyes to look at Jongin who was standing there with his arms crossed over his chest.

_This Universe hates me._

He lamented mentally just before the familiar earthy scent with mellow undertones of mint finally triumphed over the pain and made itself known to him. In normal circumstances, Sehun would have hated it (he hated having Alphas – especially knot-headed ones likes Jongin – so close to him in general), but for some very odd reason his first instinct after inhaling the pheromones was to close his eyes. Thankfully, he didn’t do that, but still, there was a horrifying moment of mortification before he ultimately remembered that he was trying to hide his scent from the other and standing so close to him (even when he had covered his scent glands and have worn a hefty amount of perfume) was not going to exactly do that job.

“Why do you have to stand in the doorway?” Sehun demanded bitterly while springing away from Jongin quickly.

“I just thought that someone should be at the door to receive you,” Jongin responded drily before turning around to walk back inside. Scowling to himself, Sehun followed the other male.

“That was lam-”

“You are back.” Minseok cut him off in the middle.

“Yeah,” He replied gawkily – what else was he supposed to say, especially when he was in the middle of insulting Jongin – before hesitantly walking towards the sitting area where everyone was gathered.

“You were gone for long.” Minyoung pointed out with a frown.

“Dr. Lee took his time,” Sehun replied with the shrug of his shoulders before turning towards Yixing.

“How is Minji now?” The other Omega smiled up at him.

“The herb worked like a magic. She is sleeping right now.”

“That is good to hear,” Sehun responded with a small smile of his own and awkwardly shifted in his place. He wasn’t sure whether he wanted to find solace in his room or just join everyone.

Baekhyun solved that problem for him.

“What did Dr. Lee even want to say?” The shorter male inquired with a curious tilt of his head before patting the empty seat beside him; almost as if he knew exactly what was going through his mind. Hesitating for a second more, Sehun sighed in resignation and eventually made his way towards Baekhyun.

“Remember the request forms we submitted last year to the center?” Baekhyun’s brows furrowed in confusion.

“The one requesting permit to do our clinical rotations at the center under Dr. Lee?”

“That one,” Sehun confirmed with a hum before plopping down on the couch.

“The center approved them.”

“Are you serious?” It was funny to see the different sorts of emotions that flitted across Baekhyun’s face – first it was confusion, then surprise, then disbelief and finally elation – before he finally broke out into a huge grin.

“Why would I joke about that?” Sehun inquired with a tick of his brow.

“I wanted it as badly as you did.”

“But didn’t Dr. Lee refused to submit your forms to the center?” Minseok questioned, appearing somewhat confused.

“I remember Baekhyun whining about it for two weeks straight.”

“He didn’t give me a lot of details since it was getting late.” Sehun divulged thoughtfully.

“But back then Dr. Lee did refuse our request forms.”

“The center may have asked him to bring in some students,” Yixing added in helpfully.

“They tend to do that from time to time for interest development since not a lot of people like to work at the crime control units; especially the young doctors.”

“I was thinking the same.” Sehun agreed before letting out an amused snort.

“No wonder he looked sour while delivering the news to me.”

“He was so damn adamant about keeping us out of there.” Baekhyun joined in with a guffaw.

“Remember when he said that he would never sign the papers for us?”

“You were really mad at him because the mentor signatures were mandatory,” Minseok recalled with an airy chuckle.

“Of course, I was. Getting signatures from him was the last step. All our hard work went to the waste.” Baekhyun defended himself instantly before grinning once again.

“I am happy now though.”

“Of course, you are.” Jaehyun rolled his eyes fondly before turning towards Sehun.

“When do you guys start?”

“We still have two weeks in our current rotation so most probably after that. Dr. Lee called me and Baekhyun tomorrow to the hospital so that we can help him adjust the required hours around our scheduled classes at the University.” Sehun elaborated before drumming his fingers against the leather of the couch.

“It will be super hectic.”

“It will help you a lot in the future, especially when you want to take up residency in the unit.” Jaehyun contradicted with a smile.

“You can-”

“I can’t believe you are encouraging them!” Minyoung cut her mate off strongly, startling almost everyone.

“Dr. Lee wasn’t allowing them for a reason. It is dangerous. Those are not normal patients with normal cases. They are high-profile criminals. A single moment of carelessness can do so much damage.”

“The whole place is protected, Minyoung.” Jaehyun asserted with pursed lips.

“There are doctors who work there already.”

“I know,” Minyoung admitted.

“But there are not only Wolves at the center, Jaehyun. You guys keep humans there as well and most of them are hunters.”

_So that is what is concerning her…_

“We are stronger than them,” Baekhyun spoke up before Sehun can console her.

“Minyoung, hunters are the last thing you should worry about. Plus, there are not many of them around now anyway. We basically co-exist with humans at this point and they don’t care whether we are Wolves or not.” Their town didn’t have a lot of humans to begin with. Most of the criminals present in the center for treatment were transferred from the other packs because their center was the most secure and facilitated.

“But-”

“This is what they have chosen for themselves. They are adults now and should know how to make choices for their future. You should support them if what they want is within reason.” Jaehyun chastised his mate sternly before giving her a gentle pat on the shoulder.

“You baby them too much.”

“I don’t!” Minyoung immediately denied.

“You kind of do.” Sehun agreed with the head Alpha which earned him a glare.

“You always take his side, Sehun.”

“That is not true.” He reasoned with a sniff.

“Last week you guys were fighting whether that vase looked good over there or not and I supported you.”

“He did.” Jaehyun testified.

“I still think that vase looks ugly.”

“Yeah, it kind of doesn’t suit the whole theme.” Junmyeon supported his father.

“That does not matter.” Minyoung disputed with a frown, looking a bit offended. Junmyeon was later going to get an earful about just how fit that vase was for the patio.

“We were discussing something much more important.”

“There is nothing to discuss, sweetheart.” Jaehyun cajoled before standing up. It was clear from his tone alone that they were done talking on the subject.

“Let the kids do what they want, hmm?”

“What if something happens to them?” Minyoung protested once again though it was a lot weaker.

“It will be all part of their experience then. That is what life is all about. You should let them grow up now.”

“Fine.” She conceded with a sigh at last even when it was done reluctantly so.

“Good.” Jaehyun praised with a smile.

“I will be in the study then.” Minyoung merely nodded her head which meant that she was still pretty upset about it.

_She is going to come and talk to me later._

Sehun predicted with a fond sigh as Jaehyun made his way down the corridor on the left and stood up in his place too.

“I will be in my room-”

“Sit back down,” Minyoung ordered sternly while pointing at the couch he just got off.

“You didn’t finish your dinner. I am going to heat that up for you. Go wherever you want after that.”

“Are you mad at me?” Sehun couldn’t really stop himself from asking that.

“I am mad at both, you and Baekhyun.”

“You have always known we wanted to work with the unit though. You didn’t have a problem before. What changed so suddenly?” Baekhyun questioned with furrowed brows.

“You got in. That’s what changed.” Minyoung replied curtly before walking out.

_That is so not her._

_What is going on?_

“Mom’s not happy,” Jongdae pointed out just as his mother stepped out from the sight.

“One of you have a lecture coming on.”

“I can see that much,” Sehun replied listlessly before sitting down with a sigh.

“I don’t get why though.”

“She is just worried about you.” Kyungsoo supplied before sparing a fleeting glance towards Baekhyun.

“Knowing that Baekhyun is involved I get where exactly she’s coming from.”

“You think you know me so well, Soo.” Baekhyun, like the easy target he is, bit the bait right away.

“Wish it was true.”

“I don’t just think-”

“How have you been?” Sehun sharply turned his head to the left when he heard his brother speaking up and bit the inside of his cheek (hard enough to draw out blood) when he realized that the question was directed at him. Now, it wouldn’t have been as awkward – and tense maybe, but he has his doubts about that one – as it was if it wasn’t for the fact that Kyungsoo completely dropped whatever he was trying to say to Baekhyun just because he was too shocked.

Sehun didn’t blame him for that.

He didn’t see that one coming either.

There was a long moment of stifling tension and hush which he spent contemplating whether he wanted to just run out of there or not before Sehun finally cleared his throat. He didn’t want to talk to Chanyeol, but Jongin was there in the room and he didn’t wish to give that arrogant Alpha another reason to accuse him of things that he didn’t even think of. Or maybe it was the fact that he was still too over-whelmed and his emotions were all jumbled up at the moment.

“G-Good.” He choked out before fiddling with his fingers in an attempt to give the rising anxiety inside him an outlet.

“I am good.” The temperature of the room seemed to have dropped because suddenly everything felt so cold, tense and dreary. Sehun knew he wasn’t the only one feeling that.

“T-That is nice to hear.” It looked like his brother hasn’t been expecting a response from him because he looked equal parts shocked and equal parts hopeful.

_So…he wants to make amends now?_

It looked like Chanyeol had more to say because he–

“Here is your Spaghetti.” Minyoung walked back inside the patio, practically snapping the invisible, strung-up twine of tension into half.

“I reheated it.” She continued, blissfully unaware of the apprehension in the atmosphere, before handing Sehun over the plate and sitting down beside him.

“Thanks, Minyoung.”

“You should be. I did it for you even when I am mad.”

“You can’t stay mad at me for long,” Sehun replied weakly before picking up his fork half-heartedly.

“Don’t try me.” Minyoung snorted before gesturing towards the plate.

“Now, eat.” There was another moment of absolute and uncomfortable silence – it seemed like Minyoung had caught up to it as well because she was looking at everybody confused – which was broken by his brother.

“Medical, huh?” Chanyeol started again.

“You didn’t strike me as the studious type when we were kids.”

“Yeah…well, we are clearly not kids anymore.” Sehun ended up sounding a bit cynical even when he had no intention to. He really couldn’t help it. Their childhood, their _pleasant_ childhood, was too jeering a mention, especially at that moment.

_Nineteen years and he wants to act like nothing’s wrong._

“Of course, we are not.” His brother agreed, seemingly regretting his choice of words.

“I was just saying that it must have been hard.”

“I got by just fine.”

“Oh…I-I am glad,” Chanyeol responded before uneasily shifting in his place.

“Thanks a lot for helping Minji.”

_So I just had to help his mate to force him to talk to me._

_Fantastic._

“You don’t need to thank me for that.” Sehun avowed casually and stood up again to leave when his brother failed to say anything else.

“I am full.” He placed the plate down on the table with a meek smile.

“See you in the morning.”

“Sehun, wait-” Chanyeol called out just before he could turn around.

“I have this…I mean, I-I got something for you.” He stumbled over his words and hastily reached into his pocket to retrieve something. Sehun waited and watched on in slight curiosity – it would be a lie if he said he wasn’t feeling at least a bit giddy – until he finally saw what it was that his brother has brought for him.

All the giddiness vanished into thin air right away.

It was a Nero.

A magical earing in the shape of a Wolf totem which was commonly made out of silver – though the one that Chanyeol pulled out was made out of gold – and what made it special was its ability to dangle from the ear completely unaffected when they shifted from the human form to the Wolf form. The most important thing about it was the fact that it was gifted to young Wolves as a congratulatory gift upon shifting.

_“Why are you calling me, Sehun? I told you not t-”_

_“Please!” Sehun had been quick to cut his brother off even when the indifference in the elder male’s tone had pierced his heart like it always did. It never got better. Every time that indifference gave him a fresh wound which never healed._

_“Listen to me just this once,” He continued desperately._

_“I have never called you. I have never tried to approach you because you told me not to. I have always respected you, but Chanyeol please listen to me.”_

_“I don’t have time to waste.” Of course, he didn’t. Chanyeol never had time when it came to him._

_“I matured as an Omega,” Sehun still plowed on, clinging to the last shreds of the hope and courage that was rapidly dwindling._

_“I am scared, Chanyeol. Please…” He had trailed off with a sniff._

_“I promise I will never ask you for anything ever again but come to the town. I am really scared.” He was really scared at that time and it was within reason._

_When Omegas shifted for the first time they also got their first heat which happened to be exceptionally potent and made them really vulnerable. Every year, exactly after a week of Blue Moon, they were isolated in the cabins built within the heart of the woods to keep them away from the potential danger and to keep them from effecting the people of the pack._

_The Omega’s family or relatives were responsible for their safety which meant that Minyoung was going to take care of Minseok and Jaehyun was of course, going to stand guard outside his son’s cabin to protect them. Mr. and Mrs. Byun were going to be with Baekhyun._

_Sehun only had his brother to protect him._

_“You do know I am in the middle of my training. I can’t just leave.” Chanyeol had argued though for the first time in a long while it had seemed like he was effected._

_Now, of course, Sehun knew he was just deluding himself._

_“Minyoung told me they will give you leave because I have no one else.”_

_“It is a four days journey down and then four days back. Lord knows how much time I would have to spend in the town because of you. That is almost half-a-month waste of my time.”_

_“Chanyeol-”_

_“I have a mate here, Sehun.” His brother had cut him off in irritation._

_“I won’t leave her alone just because you are scared like a kid over something that is natural and happens to everyone. You are not the first Omega in this world and you are not going to be the first Wolf to ever shift. Don’t be ridiculous.”_

_“You promised me.” Static silence stretched from Chanyeol’s end as soon as Sehun sobbed that out. He didn’t want to bring that up, but it was his last resort._

_“I am begging you, Chanyeol…I need you. Just this once. I promise I will never show you my face a-again.”_

_“Sehun, I told you I can’t come.” He really was fighting a lost battle._

_“I have talked to Jaehyun. He told me that they would appoint an Omega nurse to stay inside the cabin with you and a trained, sedated Beta would be stationed out your cabin for safety. There is nothing to worry about.”_

_“You really do hate me, don’t you?” Sehun had finally asked his brother the question that he had always been afraid to hear an answer to._

_“Hate is a big word.” Chanyeol had replied blankly._

_“I simply don’t care about you.” That was what Sehun had been afraid to hear even when he had known. He had known for so many years yet hearing it out loud had crushed him with a force that was too familiar and too novel at the same time._

_“So for Selene’s sake leave me alone. You are just a burden to me. Nothing else. It is troublesome enough that you turned out to be an Omega and everyone expects me to be responsible for you.”_

_“I am sorry for bothering you.” Sehun had choked out in a thick voice._

_“I only called you because once you used to treat me as your brother-”_

_“Look!” Chanyeol had cut him off again with a sigh._

_“I don’t know what fantasies they have fed you with, but I am not going to take any sort of accountability of you. Everyone is capable of taking care of their own person. You should be too. Don’t expect anything from me.” It was stupid how even after that call Sehun had hoped for his brother to show up till the very last moment._

Nero was a nice gift.

 _Heck!_ It was a beautiful gift and Sehun would have been happy to receive it only if it wasn’t for the fact that his brother had no idea about his Wolf. Like everyone else, Chanyeol didn’t know the truth too which meant that-

_He is definitely trying to mock me._

“You know,” Sehun started in a slightly choked up voice.

“Every time I think I can’t be any more disappointed in you, you reach a new low.” His brother’s eyes widened in surprise upon hearing that.

“What are you trying to say?” Chanyeol inquired with furrowed brows before standing up in his place.

“I just wanted to give you something…” The elder male defended himself heatedly though he trailed off at the end of his sentence when he finally realized why his gift might have been offending. Sehun was having a hard time deciding whether it was an act or not.

“I-I didn’t mean it like that.”

“You sure didn’t.” Sehun mocked with a scoff.

“Sehun, I swear. I didn’t-”

“You didn’t know? You forgot?” Chanyeol fell silent when Sehun completed his sentence for him.

“None of them are appeasing if that is what you are going for.”

“It slipped my mind.” His brother admitted before passing a hand through his hair in frustration.

“I was not trying to imply anything.”

“I find it a little hard to believe.” Sehun accused with a dry chuckle before turning around. Maybe he was being unfair. Maybe Chanyeol was indeed telling the truth. Maybe the elder male didn’t intend to mock him. Sehun didn’t even care if he did because he wasn’t Wolf-less in the first place. _What,_ he cared about the most was the day he shifted. It was that painful memory. It was the way he had humiliated and degraded himself over the call and have practically begged his brother to show up.

Chanyeol hadn’t cared about it. He had denounced him completely; had called him a burden. The elder male may not be trying to mock him, but he was definitely trying to imply something.

“Sehun-”

“Save it, Chanyeol.” He cut his brother off curtly before hastily making his way towards the entrance of the patio. He just wanted to walk out of there. Sitting with everyone was definitely a bad idea. He should have just listened to Jongin and stayed away from everyone.

_I stir up drama every freaking time._

He hated it. He hated the way Chanyeol still had so much influence on him.

“You should at least listen to what he has to say.” Sehun stopped in his tracks as soon as he heard that and whirled around to face Jongin; who was looking at him in disapproval.

“He is your elder brother.”

“Evidently, you remember that more than I do.” Sehun taunted while walking back inside.

“He was trying to give you a gift. What you are doing is insulting.” Jongin asserted, appearing a bit ticked off by his taunt, before standing up in his place too.

“Jongin-” Chanyeol tried to make his friend back off but was cut short.

“Insulting,” Sehun reiterated in a musing manner, completely ignoring his brother, and took a step closer to the other with a smirk.

“I assume insulting one of the leaders is a heinous sin. Isn’t it, _Your Highness?_ ”

“What the hell is your problem?” Jongin demanded with a glower.

“Guys!” Minyoung called out in warning, but Sehun was way too angry at the moment to pay it any heed.

“I don’t know.” He replied with obvious irritation.

“You seem to be the know-it-all here. Take a wild guess.”

“This thing between you and Chanyeol-”

“Is _personal_.” The taller male stressed before tilting his head slightly.

“Why are you interfering?”

“Chanyeol is my best friend.” Jongin snapped while pinning him down with a glare.

_Surprise, surprise…_

“And?” Sehun challenged with a scowl.

“You can be his mate for all I care.”

“Stop it, you guys!” Chanyeol pleaded with a frown which only made his temper flare further. Sehun glared at his brother for a long moment – while seething silently – before looking away with a suffering sigh.

“Whatever, assholes.” He grumbled under his breath and stormed out of the sitting area.

_They are not worth it anyway._

* * *

I hope you guys will enjoy the chapter ^^

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	6. Chapter 6

_“Scars remind us of where we have been, what we have gone through and how we have overcame it. They remind us of what we have triumphed over, Sehun. They don’t have to dictate you. They don’t have to edict where you are going or what you do with your life.”_

Minyoung was the one who said that to him. Sehun still clearly remembered each and every word. She was so gentle, so kind and so careful as if he was some fragile doll, as if she was afraid that her words will break him down.

Back then, he had hated that feeling, but thinking about it now, perhaps she was justified in being cautious. He wasn’t ready to talk about it. He wasn’t even ready to _think_ about it, but memories didn’t play by his rules. They came to him again and again, one night after another.

He was helpless.

_My scars define me though._

He let them define him. They made him the person he was today. Even after such a long time, he was still standing where he used to be five years ago. He never moved on; never turned to the next page.

He never moved to the next chapter of his life.

Maybe it was all because he never had the chance to tell his _true_ story to the others. He took out parts that were needed to form a coherent whole.

He took out _important_ pieces of the puzzle.

How can he move on if he doesn’t cover the essentials? How will anything fit if people didn’t even know who he really was? How will they make sense of his life if they didn’t know that a White Wolf existed in the first place?

_They will never know._

“They can never know…” Sehun muttered under his breath and trailed his pale fingers against the jagged, pinkish scar of the claw on his left side. It stretched more towards his back than the front and he had to actually turn to his side to have a clear view of it in the full-length mirror he was standing in front of.

He didn’t look at it often. Truth be told, he avoided looking at it because whenever he did the scar burned and throbbed just like the day he had gotten it. It’s been five years, but he still felt the pain as if the claw had just torn through his flesh a minute ago.

_The pain was exuberating._

_He had no idea how long he would be able to stand it. Heck! He had no idea how long it had been or about what was going on at all. A week ago, he matured as an Omega. Two days ago, he got his first, unforgiving, heat and along with it he was supposed to shift, but he wasn’t! His Wolf wasn’t coming out._

_There was pain – forget that! There was agony. He was suffering. He was miserable, but he wasn’t shifting. His bones were cracking, his muscles were cramping and it felt like his flesh was being torn from the inside, but his fucking Wolf wouldn’t come out. On top of that all, his heat just won’t break. It was as potent and unmerciful as it was on the first day._

_Lord! He had wished to die only if it meant his suffering would end._

_Sehun remembered writhing on the bed in the lone cabin. The nurse that was appointed to him had gone to fetch a doctor on the first day of him not shifting and had been gone since then. Of course, she had also forgotten to get a doctor for him or perhaps she had thought that he wasn’t worth any effort. Perhaps, she was sure that he wouldn’t make it out alive anyway. He still didn’t know. It didn’t matter anymore._

_It had been two whole days since someone tended to him. There was no one to bring him food or keep him hydrated. He hardly had any presence of mind due to his heat and the pain, but he had still scrapped by, even if it was barely so._

_Finally, on the third night of the torture, something changed._

_The pain grew more intense. Every fiber of his body ached as if it was trying to punish him for something. His skeletal-structure started to alter. His bones cracked, grew, shrunk, and dislocated. Sehun had been positive that it was his end, but fortunately (or unfortunately) he continued to breathe. He continued to bear the torment before white hairs started to slowly grow out of his pores._

_He was shifting._

_It was happening. His Wolf was coming out. After three days of maddening pain, he was finally going to shift into his Wolf._

_He had been happy. Trust him, he was, but that lasted only until he registered what pristine white fur growing on his body actually meant. Amidst all that torture, Sehun had frozen. For a moment, he had forgotten where he was or what was happening just so he could properly feel the awe that was coursing through his system. But then it all came down crashing on to him. He hadn’t known a lot about White Wolves at that time, but one thing that he did know (that everybody knew) was the fact that mating with him would make the other Wolf powerful beyond belief. He knew at that very moment that he was dead meat; that he was going to be nothing, but a tool. He had known that his life would never be the same._

_The pain had grown._

_Maybe it had been his panicked state. Maybe it was all in his head. Maybe it was something he felt only mentally – he still believed that it was physically impossible – or maybe it was all real. He couldn’t remember anymore. All he did remember is the howl of agony that tore from his throat. He just wanted to make it stop. He was ready to do anything. He didn’t want –_

_The door to the cabin had slammed open._

“No!”

“Sehun..?” Minseok’s calm, but unsure voice brought the said male back to the present.

“Minseok?” Sehun panted out in bewilderment and stared at the door that his friend has thrown open.

“I-It is just you.” He continued while gazing at the entrance in fear, almost as if he was expecting that Beta to walk inside.

“Were you expecting someone else?” Minseok inquired carefully while taking in his sweaty form and pale complexion. Sehun let his shirt fall down when he caught the other male staring at his scar in concern.

“No…I-I wasn’t expecting…anyone. No.” The taller male rushed out before moving towards his bed and sitting down.

“You surprised me. That’s all.” Minseok lingered by the entrance of his room wordlessly for a second or two before he hesitantly walked inside.

“I am sorry about that. I should have knocked.”

“It is okay. I was a bit lost in my thoughts.” Sehun assured with a tight-lipped smile when his friend came down to sit next to him on the bed.

“You were out the whole day today. It is almost dinner time.” Minseok started after a brief pause.

“Yeah, Dr. Lee held me and Baekhyun for quite a while and then we went over to his place. I did call you to ask if you wanted to come too, but it went straight to the voice mail.” His friend gave him a small smile.

“I turned my phone off to study.” Sehun nodded his head in acknowledgment and stared down at his restless hands. He really wasn’t in the mood to make small chats at the moment.

“Sehun,” Sehun looked up at Minseok when he noticed the lilt of worry to his tone.

“I am okay.” Somehow, he felt the need to assert that.

“You don’t look okay to me.”

“But I am.” His friend simply shook his head.

“This is why I don’t like it when you are alone. You spend too much time recalling things that you shouldn’t be thinking about.”

“I wasn’t!”

“Sehun!” Minseok called out again, this time sounding a bit more desperate, before holding onto his fidgeting hands.

“I don’t know what exactly happened that night, okay and I am not saying it is easy or I know what you are feeling, but trust me on this…” His friend trailed off with a sigh.

“Trust me that man is not going to come back. He is dead.”

“I know,” Sehun responded weakly.

_I was the one who killed him._

He thought ruefully before giving the other male a timid smile.

“What is that in your hand?”

“Ah- this,” Minseok began with a sheepish grin and reluctantly straightened up in his place.

“Chanyeol left it lying on the table so I picked it up…just in case you wanted to have it.” He continued, sounding a little weary, and extended the gold accessory in his direction. Sehun stared at it wordlessly for a long while before finally taking it out of his friend’s hand.

“Thanks. I really did want to have it.”

“I had doubts about that after what happened yesterday.”

“I realized that I over-reacted once all the anger had ebbed away. It wasn’t fair to Chanyeol.” Sehun revealed with a sigh and placed down the earring on the bed.

“That is just who he is when he gets nervous. He doesn’t lose his cool a lot, but when he does he tends to say or do something stupid. Even when we were kids he used to get in trouble because of that a lot. I am sure he wasn’t lying yesterday.”

“You trust him so much even after what he has done.” Minseok reckoned with a snort.

“Chanyeol doesn’t lie, Minseok. He has always been honest – brutally so. He wouldn’t lie about something so small.”

“Well…I am sure he would be happy to know that you accepted his gift.” His friend predicted before getting off the bed.

“Dad asked me to call you down. He wants to talk to you in his study.”

“Sure, I will be down in a minute.”

…………

  
_Minseok forgot to mention why I was being called down…_

Sehun groused mentally when he saw Jongin in the study as soon as he entered it.

_Minyoung must have told Jaehyun what happened._

He might be regretting over-reacting towards his brother, but he did not feel sorry for giving the tanned male a piece of his mind yesterday. The stupid Alpha absolutely deserved it.

“Sehun,” Jaehyun acknowledged his presence right away and beckoned him to walk in further. Hesitating for a second, Sehun cast a glance in Jongin’s direction who was already glaring at him.

_So mature._

Rolling his eyes, he did what he was asked to do and crossed his arms over his chest.

“I heard you two had an argument; a very heated one actually.” The head Alpha started again after an agonizing second of observing them.

“Do I get an explanation for that?”

“Ask him,” Sehun responded with the shrug of his shoulders.

“I was simply minding my own business.” Jongin turned towards him with a scoff.

“Does minding your own business include over-reacting, creating a scene and insulting my best friend who also happens to be my second-in-command?” The other male challenged before his lips tilted up into a shrewd smirk.

“Your _personal_ matter with Chanyeol may or may not have anything to do with me, but you cannot go around insulting my second-in-command right in front of me without expecting a condemnation for it. I have an order to maintain.” Sehun felt himself silently fuming. 

“First of all, I already told you that I couldn’t care any less about him being your best friend and second of all, he is not your second-in-command because you are not the head Alpha _yet._ ” He notified and gave the other male a smirk of his own.

“Unless you have a point which is actually valid this argument of yours is a dead end.” If Jongin was pissed at being out-smarted (which Sehun was hoping he would be just so he could get satisfaction out of it – sweet victories), he didn’t show any indications. In fact, he hummed in an appraising manner and slowly traced Sehun’s face with scrutinizing eyes which for some reason made him feel a bit hot under the collar.

“I would like to hear you say that again a month from now.” The tanned male goaded while feigning nonchalance.

“Excuse me if I am wrong,” Sehun started with a disbelieving laugh.

“…but that sounds a lot like a threat to me.”

“It could be-”

“Cut it out already, you two!” Jaehyun broke in with a frown before turning towards his son.

“What is your issue, Jongin?”

“My issue is _him!_ ” Jongin exploded (the façade of indifference wearing off completely) and jabbed a thumb in Sehun’s direction.

“He was the one who came onto me yesterday and called me _‘your highness’_ as if I think I am too superior. He is the one who made baseless assumptions-”

“I made baseless assumptions?” Sehun cut him off with a scowl.

“You were the one who made assumptions about me first that night! _You_ implied it first that I think I am above everyone else when you had no reason to.” He asserted defensively and turned to face Jaehyun.

“His _real_ issue is the fact that he has this preconceived image of me and seems to think of me as some monster. I am not even surprised, after all, he is Chanyeol’s _best friend._ ”

“He tried to make things okay with you yesterday.” Jongin turned on him with pinched brows.

“But you’re obviously way too selfish.”

“Jongin,” Jaehyun warned sternly.

“You don’t know what you are talking about.”

“I know-”

“ _Just enough?_ ” Sehun completed Jongin’s sentence for him with a sneer.

“Here’s what, Jongin. In reality, you know _nothing_.” He stressed gravely before walking closer to the other male.

“What you think is enough isn’t exactly sufficient. Your father would vouch for me on that one.” Jongin stared at him in distrust for about a whole minute – gauging whether he was bluffing or not – before facing his father.

“Tell me then.” He demanded in a low, controlled voice.

“What is it that I don’t know?”

“You will find out when the time comes.” Jaehyun deflected with a sigh and brought up a hand to massage his temple.

“No, you will tell me now.” Jongin contradicted strongly.

“I am not blind. I _see_ what is going on around here, okay. I have noticed how rigid mom has been towards Chanyeol and I clearly did not miss the accusation in Baekhyun’s and Minseok’s eyes.”

“Jongin-” The head Alpha started with a disapproving frown though his son cut him off.

“The Blue Moon is less than a month away, Alpha.” Jongin pointed out in frustration.

“You have been in my place once. You know how much work-load, pressure, and expectations are there. This whole tension in the house is not helping me or the others with anything. How do you expect me to keep the whole pack in order when I can’t even solve the issues at home?”

“You won’t be solving any issues by being biased,” Sehun remarked snidely; maybe a little unkindly too.

“I am _not_ being biased.” Jongin denied right away.

“Oh, really?” He dared with a cocked brow.

“Tell me then. What monstrous crime can a three-year-old kid commit to warrant such a consequence?”

“Chanyeol has his reasons.” 

“Reasons,” Sehun repeated with a bitter scoff and stared straight into the Alpha’s eyes. He wanted to make another snide comment. He wanted to mock Jongin. He wanted to provoke him, but something about the expression in the other male’s eyes simply made him powerless. It drained all the anger out of him and only left fatigue in its stead…

He was tired.

He was tired of fighting.

“What could I have possibly done to my brother?” Sehun inquired, this time sounding more exhausted than angry.

“Did I rat him out to my parents? Ate his favorite candy? Killed his pet? What is it that makes me so bad, Jongin? You are his best friend. He must have told you.” Jongin’s eyes visibly melted at that. It was as if he knew exactly what Sehun was feeling at the moment – knew how shattered he was. It was almost as if he could sense his distress and wanted to comfort him.

For a wild second, Sehun believed he really did.

“He wants to make amends.” Jongin started again after a beat of intense silence.

“Is it really that easy?” Sehun questioned with an incredulous huff.

“N-Nineteen years is a long time. It is more than half my life. He can’t just waltz back in without any explanation; without any apology. How can he expect things to go back to normal just like that?”

“Look…” Jongin trailed off with a sigh.

“I know Chanyeol. I have spent my whole life with him and one thing that I am sure of is the fact that he is not an irrational person. He never told me his reasons, but something must have happened. I am not saying it was your fault, but yesterday he did tell me that all along he has trusted the wrong person. That is all I can give you.” Sehun’s brows furrowed at that.

_The wrong person?_

“Who?” Jaehyun intervened all of a sudden, startling both of them. Honestly, Sehun had forgotten that the head Alpha was even there with them in the room.

_What even?_

He stole his gaze away from Jongin with a racing heart and faced the front feeling utterly confounded.

_What the hell just happened?_

Jaehyun was eyeing them intently too, as if asking the same question, which did not make Sehun feel any better.

“He…” Jongin broke off to clear his throat before continuing.

“He did not give me the name.”

“I see.” Jaehyun nodded thoughtfully before successively staring each one of them down.

“You guys can leave now. I don’t want to hear about another fight. Am I clear?”

“Yes, Alpha,” Sehun responded diligently and spared a glance towards Jongin when he merely nodded his head in affirmation.

“Good. Go have your dinner now.”

……………

“So...” Jongdae began curiously and crossed his arms over the dining table all of them were seated at; waiting for the dinner to be served.

“What did Dad say?” Sehun assumed the question was for him, given the fact that the person speaking was looking at him directly.

“Nothing much.” He responded as casually as he could and chanced a glance at Jongin who was, for some improbable reason, staring straight back at him.

Sehun felt his heart skip a beat.

He still wasn’t over what had happened in the study. His mind was still reeling with all sorts of possibilities in a feeble attempt to make sense of things. There was something, a connection perhaps, that he had felt back there. He didn’t know what it was or why it was there, but the fact that it was with Jongin was driving Sehun up the wall. Heck! It was driving him crazy.

“Seriously, Sehun.” Jongdae deadpanned, snapping him out of his reverie.

“Nothing? You guys were in there for almost half-an-hour. That’s not nothing.”

“Let’s just say Jaehyun was making sure we won’t have an unpleasant argument again.” The other male still didn’t appear satisfied with his answer. Sehun was sure he had another retort coming his way only if it wasn’t for Kyungsoo who walked in with the food along with Yixing.

_Did he cook again?_

“Jongdae, why don’t you just let it be?” Kyungsoo admonished with a shake off his head before carefully placing the pot of whatever he has made in the middle of the table.

“They clearly don’t want to tell you.” He continued once he was done and wiped his hands clean on the apron.

“When has that ever stopped Jongdae before?” Junmyeon commented drily and helped his mate set the other pot down.

“Exactly!” Jongdae agreed right away and once again turned to face Sehun.

_Oh boy-_

Before he could even finish that thought a loud phone ring pierced through the otherwise relatively silent atmosphere.

_Good heavens!_

It took Sehun a moment to realize that it was his own phone, which was placed on the table, ringing and then another to realize just who the caller was.

_Hawk._

All the relief that he has felt when the ring has disrupted Jongdae vanished into the thin air. Now he wished that the call had never come even if it meant telling everyone about what had happened inside with Jaehyun.

_Why would he call me now?_

Sehun whined mentally before discreetly eyeing the people around him. There was no way in hell he was taking that call with so many _sharp_ ears around him. He wouldn’t have taken that call even if he was with Baekhyun and Minseok alone.

“Are you not going to pick that up?” Sehun turned his face to the right when he heard that question and cracked a smile at Yixing who has taken the empty seat next to him.

“Um…no.” He replied awkwardly and quickly reached out for his phone to reject the call.

“Why not?” Of course, Jongdae would be nosy about that.

“It was an unknown number. I don’t pick those.” He tried to act as indifferent as he could.

“It could be important.” Jongdae pointed out with a ticked brow which only made Sehun sigh.

“I doubt. Most of them are wrong numbers.” Minseok snorted in his cup of water upon hearing that.

“ _Wrong numbers.”_ He mocked before placing down the cup.

“More like obsessed admirers from our University. Do they really think calling you again and again would get them anywhere? Where do they even get the number from?”

“You have stalkers?” Jongdae conveniently concluded before taking the bowl of stew that Kyungsoo has extended in his direction.

“That is a stretch.” Sehun was quick to deny.

“That is ridiculous!” Chanyeol burst out before anyone else could pitch in.

“Why haven’t you reported them to the authorities?” Sehun gaped at his brother, surprised for a moment, before nervously rubbing the back of his neck.

“It is n-not that serious.”

“How is this not serious?” Chanyeol demanded heatedly.

_What the hell is up with him?_

“They just call me once and give up when I don’t pick up.” Sehun didn’t know why he was even explaining himself to his brother.

“What if they call you twice?” Why was Jongdae feeding fuel to the fire?

“I block them, _Jongdae_ ,” Sehun replied, looking fairly annoyed.

“Now, that we have established there are no stalkers, can I eat dinner in peace? I would like to go to bed on time since the University starts again tomorrow.”

“Speaking of University,” Minyoung cut in before Jongdae can give him any sort of a response.

“What are the plans for tomorrow morning? Who goes with who? Have you guys matched your schedules?”

“I have a class at 10 AM.” Minseok was the first one to collaborate.

“Our orientation program starts at 11 AM, but we can leave with Minseok. He can give us a bit of a tour around the place.” Kyungsoo joined in.

“Sehun?” Sehun shrugged his shoulder when Minyoung turned to face him.

“You know, my classes start at 8 AM. I will leave alone and then pick Baekhyun up.”

“You have classes at 8 AM all week?” Kyungsoo questioned with a grimace and extended a bowl in his direction.

“I like it actually,” Sehun responded before taking the bowl with a thankful smile.

“I wake up an hour earlier to take a jog in the nearby woods. It helps me stay fresh for the rest of the day.”

“You will do it tomorrow too?” Minji suddenly chimed in.

“Yeah…” Sehun wasn’t sure why she looked so excited.

“Can I join you?” She practically pleaded.

“Ever since I got pregnant, Chanyeol won’t let me go alone and he is too lazy to wake up in the morning to go with me for a run.”

“It is not a run, Minji. I can’t shift.” Sehun reminded her, in hopes of deterring her without having to bluntly refuse, though she didn’t seem bothered.

“I like to take a jog too! Please, take me with you. Chanyeol doesn’t have a problem with it.” His brother looked like he had something to say about that, but his mate’s glare shut him up. Sehun couldn’t help the amused smirk that graced his lips.

“Well…as long as nobody has a problem with it you can come with me.”

“Great! It is set then.”

* * *

Hey! 

Thanks a lot for reading!

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	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PLEASE READ THIS NOTE!!
> 
> So my exams are going to start from 15th July onwards and due to the pandemic let's just say I am not as well prepared as I would like to be. On top of that, I have six courses to prepare for and the syllabus is really extensive.  
> I am writing this note to let you know that this is going to be the last update that I am going to make before my exams end which would be in the middle of August.  
> I will make the next update on 15th August and from then on will continue my usual schedule of uploading twice a month.  
> I hope you guys will understand and will be willing to wait for these two or so months.  
> Please, stay safe and healthy.

“Yesterday…” Sehun jerked his head to the side in surprise – startled at being spoken to all of a sudden – and stared at Jongin, his side-profile to be precise, with confusion etched over his face.

_Why the hell is he talking to me?_

Last time he checked, they were still on pretty bad terms.

“Yesterday?” He urged with a skeptical raise of his brow when the other male refused to utter another word and hugged the books in his hands closer to his chest self-consciously.

Jongin didn’t turn to face him.

For some reason, Sehun was thankful for that.

They were currently walking through one of the open compounds of the University which lead to the department of Business and Management Sciences. Baekhyun was a couple of steps ahead of them along with a very curious Jongdae and a very irritated Kyungsoo; considering that Baekhyun was literally hanging off his arm, Sehun didn’t blame him for that.

“Last night, in dad’s study,” Jongin alluded thoughtfully before pocketing both of his hands. It seemed like he was conflicted; like he had too much to focus on and too little time for that which in turn hindered him from focusing on anything properly altogether.

“We had a fight,” Sehun added wryly in an attempt of being helpful.

“Yeah.” The other male acknowledged drily before casting a fleeting glance in his direction.

“But that is not what I am trying to talk about.”

“What else…” Sehun started with a frown though he trailed off in the middle of his sentence. His heartbeat picked up as soon as he connected the dots and worked out just where their conversation was headed.

_So I wasn’t the only one who felt that._

He wasn’t sure whether that was a good thing or not.

He had kind of hoped for Jongin to have felt the connection (?) too so that they can make sense out of whatever it was together. _But_ that required proper communication. Now, Sehun would rather flush himself down the toilet than go up to Jongin willingly for tête-à-tête which meant that he was more inclined towards the probability of the other male not having felt anything at all.

It made things easier for him.

“W-What else are you trying to talk about then?” Sehun knew he wasn’t being very convincing at the moment, but desperate times called for desperate measures.

Jongin halted in his steps.

“Doesn’t it bother you?” He demanded and whirled around on him. Sehun instinctively took a step back before cursing himself mentally for cowering like a typical Omega. There was just something about the aura around Jongin that intimidated him.

“Doesn’t _what_ bother me?” There was a second’s pause – a second too long – which the other male spent gauging his face intently.

Sehun shifted in his place nervously.

“You are-”

“Are you two fighting again?” Baekhyun unceremoniously butted in their conversation right when Jongin began to speak again. Sehun silently thanked his friend for saving him.

“Yeah, the usual.” He responded as casually as he could before shrugging his shoulders and hastily walking past Jongin.

“It was literally just five-minutes. How did you two manage to get in a fight?” Jongdae interrogated once Sehun was close enough for him to be heard.

“It takes Baekhyun less than that to annoy Kyungsoo.” Sehun countered with a wave of his hand which earned him a scoff from the said made.

“He annoys me every time he breathes.”

“Exactly my point.” Sehun drawled blankly though he couldn’t stop his lips from twitching when he caught Kyungsoo scowling at him.

“Baekhyun is a liability.”

“Ouch!” Baekhyun cut in dramatically before swinging an arm over Kyungsoo’s shoulder.

“You know, I read about this really fine thing in the magazine yesterday. They call it being nice. You should try it sometime, Soo.” Sehun bit down on his bottom lip to keep himself from laughing when Kyungsoo conveniently elbowed Baekhyun in the stomach.

“Try and act like a normal person first.” Grinning like an idiot, Baekhyun took a step away from Kyungsoo and latched himself onto Sehun’s arm.

“Anyway, we are in your department. The auditorium should be somewhere at the back.”

“Somewhere at the back,” Jongin repeated with a ticked brow.

“You don’t know where it exactly is?”

“We are medical students,” Baekhyun responded with a sigh.

“Your department is literally on the opposite side. Sehun and I often spend our time in the library. We don’t come here a lot.” Sehun purposefully averted his gaze when Jongin turned to look at him.

“Minseok said that most of the auditoriums are at the back on the first floor.” Jongdae supported Baekhyun once they were inside the building.

“Which means that it should be at the end of this hallway and I _think_ I can see it from here too.”

“Yup, there it is. The very last door on the left.” Baekhyun confirmed before throwing his bag on the floor and rolling his shoulder.

“Let’s just wait here. The entrance of the auditorium is too crowded.”

“Baekhyun’s right.” Kyungsoo agreed before gently putting his own bag down against the wall too.

“All these scents are already irritating me.” Sehun’s interest piqued at that.

“Your previous institute must have been really different from this one.” He remarked while leaning his back against the left wall.

“Not really,” Kyungsoo replied with a snort.

“I mean structure-wise it was a lot more spacious and there were um…fewer students? Other than that there aren’t any glaring differences.”

“Makes sense,” Sehun replied with a nod.

“We used to have gyms to ourselves there for training.” Jongdae joined the conversation.

“I haven’t seen one here yet.”

“Those are inside the Physical Education department though I am not sure if they would be as advanced as the ones you had before.” Sehun provided helpfully before cocking his head to the side in mild curiosity.

“I have heard the training was very harsh.” He started again after a short moment of silence.

“It must have been hard especially with how cold the weather is up there.”

“We got by.” Jongin responded tersely before anyone else could and looked him straight in the eyes – the expression on his face clearly told Sehun that their earlier conversation hadn’t ended yet – while coolly shucking off his bag as well.

“Trust me, with all the physical training the cold climate was the least of our concerns.” Sehun stiffened a little in his place when the other male slowly walked up to him (it felt almost as if he was being cornered) and leaned against the wall next to him.

Realistically speaking there was more than enough distance between them – which meant that there was no reason for him to make a fool out of himself – but Jongin made him feel anxious.

It was stupid.

It was irrational.

Sehun knew that much, but the Wolf caged inside him didn’t play by logic. It created a tumult inside him. It made him feel restless and after that weird moment in the study last night, Sehun wasn’t sure what he was to think of it anymore. Jongin clearly had an effect on him – at least his Wolf – though _why_ and _how_ remained a mystery to him.

Honestly, he wanted it to remain a mystery for the rest of his whole life. He wanted to stay as far away from Jongin as it was possible. He did not want to talk about whatever happened the night prior. It was all some bizarre accident and nothing more. There was no use fussing over it.

“I second that.” Kyungsoo agreed with Jongin, completely oblivious to Sehun’s internal struggle.

“Our schedules were insanely packed.”

“You learned how to be a great cook despite that.” Baekhyun pointed out with a snort.

“That is because I cook to blow-off steam.” Kyungsoo divulged with the shrug of his shoulders.

“Still, I and Minseok can’t boil an egg to save our lives.” Baekhyun went on.

“Sehun enjoys cooking a lot though.” Kyungsoo turned towards Sehun at that.

“I didn’t know you cook.”

“I like to do it from time to time,” Sehun replied with a small smile (feeling quite excited that there was someone who he can share his love for cooking with) before continuing.

“We should cook together sometime.” The bright, heart-shaped grin that Kyungsoo rewarded him with was blinding.

“We totally should.” He agreed enthusiastically.

“I learned to make this special cuisine of the traditional people of Selene from a guy when I was still a freshman and wanted to make it for you guys here, but it needs more than two hands. We can try that now over the weekend since you will be there to help.”

“That sounds like a great plan-” Sehun was cut short by Baekhyun.

“Awesome! I can help you two around.”

“No.” Kyungsoo deadpanned instantly.

“But-”

“ _No._ You are not entering the Kitchen, Baekhyun.” Sehun groaned in misery mentally when Baekhyun turned to face him with a lethal pout.

_He knows I would never say no to that cute, stupid face._

“Sehunnie~ tell Kyungsoo that I will be a huge help.”

“You won’t be.” Sehun contradicted with the roll of his eyes before turning towards Kyungsoo with a sigh.

“Just let him be there. I promise you, he won’t be a pest.” Kyungsoo, for a second, looked like he was going to call-off the whole plan altogether, but in the end, decided against it.

“Fine, but I will cut him into pieces if he opened his mouth.”

“Deal.”

“Hey!” Baekhyun protested though Jongdae didn’t give him a chance to continue.

“Sehun, is it me or that girl over there is staring at you?” Sehun faced the direction Jongdae was looking in, almost instinctively, before turning back around a moment later with a raised brow.

“What makes you think she is staring at me? It could be Baekhyun or you guys.”

“From her general angle, I am sure she can’t see Baekhyun properly and because she is an Alpha.” Jongdae notified in a duh-tone as if it was the most obvious thing.

“Why would she be staring at us?”

“I don’t know,” Sehun slurred with a frown.

“If you think with your brain instead of your knot there is a very possible chance that she is curious about the soon-to-be leaders of the pack she is a part of.”

“Nope. I bet my Kidney she is coming here for you.”

“I don’t want your Kidney,” Sehun grumbled under his breath sourly. He knew Jongdae was right because the girl was currently walking in their direction and from the stink of it he knew that she wasn’t curious.

_Good heavens._

He gibed mentally as soon as he felt the tap on his shoulder.

“Hey, you are Sehun, right?” Sehun gave her a tight-lipped smile as a response.

“Yeah.”

“I am Jiyeon. MBA, final year.” The girl introduced herself with an amiable grin.

“Oh…” Sehun replied intelligently before awkwardly clearing his throat.

“Can I help you, Jiyeon?”

“A lot actually,” She replied with a coy smile.

Sehun’s left eye twitched in irritation.

“I haven’t seen you and Baekhyun around here before.” The girl continued when he didn’t deem her with an answer.

“What brings you two to our department?”

“They were showing us around.” Jongdae chimed in with a grin.

“It is our first day here, you know.”

“Ah – I won’t waste more of your time then,” Jiyeon assured courteously before facing Sehun again.

_Here goes nothing…_

“I was just wondering if you would like to go out for some drinks with me tonight.” She inquired with a flirty smirk before sagely stepping into his personal space – purely unwanted and uninvited.

Sehun discreetly shifted away from her little.

“I am…busy tonight.” He tried to reject her as politely as he could.

“What about tomorrow then?” She really wasn’t getting the hint, was she? He was sure that nothing about his face at the moment implied that he was interested.

“Come on,” Jiyeon continued coquettishly and suddenly leaned down to whisper in his ear.

“I will make it worth your while.”

_Is she freaking releasing her pheromones at the moment?_

Sehun lurched back in his place to put some much-needed distance between himself and the cocky girl – he can’t believe her audacity – and yelped in alarm when he bumped straight into Jongin; who thankfully managed to steady him before he lost his balance and humiliated himself in front of so many people.

“You okay?” Feeling his heart practically thundering inside his throat, Sehun turned his head to look back at Jongin – his minty scent was maddeningly arresting up close – before slowly trailing his gaze down to stare at the hand that the other male has placed securely on his waist.

Jongin removed his hand almost immediately.

“I am so sorry,” Jiyeon apologized before Sehun could form any sort of response.

“I didn’t mean to scare you like that.” She continued, appearing a bit embarrassed though he knew that it wasn’t necessarily sincere. He knew that she wasn’t ashamed of what she did. She was just embarrassed because he has rejected her very obvious advances.

Sehun felt himself silently fuming.

He loathed her kind. He can’t believe she was acting all innocent and apologetic while trying to fucking intimidate and influence him with her _pheromones_.

_Fucking Alphas!_

“It is okay.” He gritted out and shifted to the side to be as far away from her as possible.

He would have given her a piece of his mind only if he wasn’t standing in the middle of a freaking crowded hallway. As much as he wanted to, he didn’t really fancy creating a scene at that very moment.

“Does that mean you will think about it?” Maybe it wasn’t the time and maybe he was looking too much into it, but it was oddly touching when Jongin casually stepped forward to stand between him and Jiyeon. Sehun knew that the other male meant to imply nothing with it (there was no reason for him to), but still he was thankful; even if it was just a little.

“I am really busy these upcoming weeks.”

_Just leave me alone!_

“Oh- well, you can call me if you find the time.” Jiyeon tried with a smile and extended a slip of paper in his direction.

_Damn, she is really persistent, isn’t she?_

Sehun stared at her hand for a painfully awkward second, silently contemplating whether being straightforward with her would be considered as offensive or not, before shaking his head with a sigh.

_Whatever._

“Look, I am really not interested-”

“Let me take that.” Baekhyun interrupted with a grin and took the number from her.

“Don’t worry. He will call you.”

“What?” Sehun disputed and faced his friend with an incredulous expression.

Baekhyun sadly ignored him.

“Great! I will wait for it then, Sehun.” Jiyeon shot him a wink – she was attractive, he would give her that – before eventually turning around and walking away. He watched her back until she eventually disappeared among the crowd and whirled around on his friend with a menacing glare.

“ _What_ the hell were you thinking?”

“Don’t sweat it Sehunnie~” Baekhyun consoled before thumping his back.

“I will help you with your little date.”

“Baekhyun.” He would have indulged his friend any other time, but this was not a joke.

“What?” The smile on Baekhyun’s face faltered.

“I don’t want to go on any sort of a date with her or _anyone_ else as a matter of fact.”

“But Sehun-” Sehun shook his head strongly to hammer his point in.

“No! Especially not her. How can you humor her after what she just did?” Baekhyun’s brows furrowed in confusion at that.

“What…did she do?”

“Dude,” Jongdae called out, sounding a bit unsure, and nervously glanced between a very confused Baekhyun and an unconvinced Sehun.

“Can’t you smell it?” Kyungsoo was the one who continued.

“She was practically reeking.”

“Reeking of what…?” Baekhyun questioned uncertainly before it finally hit him.

“Oh! You mean- oh, I get it.” Sehun cocked his head to the side with a raised brow when his friend turned to look at him with a slightly gaping mouth.

“Sehunnie…” Baekhyun began cautiously and threw him a sheepish (a little bit guilty) smile.

“You know I didn’t mean it, right? I have a stuffed nose. I swear upon Selene I had no idea.”

_Of course, he had no idea and of course, it would be something as ridiculous as a stuffed nose._

Sehun felt the corners of his mouth twitching up.

“Say something!” His friend beseeched (it was funny how desperate he looked) before taking hold of his arm.

_He is so dramatic._

“I am sorry, Sehun! Don’t be mad at me. I still have this one assignment due and you promised to help me out with it. We both know you don’t break promises- Ow! Ow! Ow!” Sehun reached out to pinch Baekhyun’s nose so that he would stop rambling.

“It hurts! Stop.”

“Will you interfere in my business from now on?” Sehun inquired still not letting go.

“Don’t be silly. I am your best friend. That is my job- ah!” Kyungsoo’s delightful laughter egged Sehun on to twist the cute button nose between his fingers.

“Will you?”

“No!”

“Good.” Baekhyun jumped away from him with a whimper as soon as he let go.

“You are getting crueler by day, Sehun.”

“Why did you feel the need to be so nosy in the first place?” Jongdae prodded with a snort.

“ _Because_ ,” Baekhyun stressed while cradling his burning nose.

“I am worried he will grow old without a mate. He turns every single one of them away and some of them are to die for.”

“Does it ever occur to you that I don’t want a mate?” Sehun pointed out with the roll of his eyes.

“Why don’t you?” Unexpectedly, it was Jongin who asked that question as if it was the most normal thing to do. Perhaps, it was between friends, but…

“Excuse me?” Sehun really couldn’t mask the incredulity in his tone.

_This is weird._

It wouldn’t have been if they were at least on better terms with each other, but after all the fighting that they have done _‘mates’_ was the last topic that Sehun had ever expected to discuss with Kim Jongin.

“You said you don’t want a mate,” Jongin repeated before crossing his arms over his chest.

“I am just asking why.”

“I simply don’t.” Sehun deflected before gawkily reaching up to rub the back of his neck.

“You must have a reason.” Why was Jongin even pushing him like this?

_What is his deal?_

“There is no reason. My life is pretty peaceful without one and I would like to keep it that way.” Jongin merely ticked a brow at his response; essentially communicating that he wasn’t convinced by the answer.

Sehun scowled to himself.

_It is none of his business anyway._

“Ah- don’t tell me you are one of those Alpha haters.” Jongdae needled with a groan.

“As far as having a mate is concerned, it could be a Beta too, so no, I am not an Alpha hater, Jongdae.” Sehun defended himself right away.

“Besides, I admire Kyungsoo quite well.”

“Thank you.” Kyungsoo acknowledged with a grin which only caused Jongdae to groan louder.

“I am positive now. You hate Alphas.” Sehun sighed at the ridiculous accusation.

“I don’t, okay.” He asserted exasperatedly before continuing.

“I like Alphas well enough, it is just that there might be objectively some categories of Alphas that I happen to be not so fond of – like Jiyeon just now or maybe some other knot-headed Alphas who think every Omega wants them.” He purposely directed the last bit of his sentence towards Jongin who merely shook his head with an airy chuckle.

“I am a very straightforward person, Oh.” The other male notified and casually pushed himself off the wall.

“So let’s talk facts here.”

“What facts are you talking about?” Sehun challenged with a frown.

“You were totally checking me out that night.”

“Night…what night?” Jongdae instantly grappled onto the new gossip.

“I checked you out that night, alright,” Sehun admitted confidently much to everyone’s shock.

“But it was not when you called me out for it _and-”_ He broke off to hold his hand up when he saw Jongin was about to interrupt him.

“If we are talking about checking people out, _you_ were totally checking _me_ out that day in the ground.”

“Wait- who checked who out?”

“You are really _bold._ ” Jongin ignored his brother completely in favor of stepping closer to Sehun with an amused smirk.

“Someone ever told you that, Sehun?”

“Plenty of times.”

“Interesting.”

“Oh- try me.” Sehun gambled with a smirk of his own and took a step forward too.

“I am full of surprises, _Alpha._ ” Something dark and sinister twinkled behind Jongin’s usually warm brown irises as soon as he provoked the Wolf inside him.

Sehun realized that he has been, perhaps, a little too bold, a moment too late.

“Really, now?” The other male prodded sagaciously before he can say something else and seized him with gleaming eyes which practically dared Sehun to provoke him again.

The taller male gulped discreetly (not very much) and instinctively took a step back.

“I-I…”

“Jeez! Guys, it is getting hot in here.” Baekhyun piped up while exaggeratedly fanning himself.

“Plus, I don’t mean to interrupt your _very_ interesting conversation, but Sehun we have to go or we will be late for our class.” Casting a final, fleeting glance towards Jongin – _damn it_ , he was still looking at him with those daunting eyes – Sehun mutely nodded his head.

“Yeah, let’s go.”

_What the fuck is actually wrong with me?_

* * *

  
  


“Hey! Sorry, I am late.” Sehun apologized as soon as he reached the table by the window and threw his bag down on the spare chair before ultimately settling down himself.

“No worries. I am used to waiting around, especially when it comes to you.”

“Oh- come on, Hawk! This is just the second time.” Sehun defended himself with a huff before picking up the water bottle from the table and breaking the seal.

“I am getting old here, literally,” Hawk responded with a disapproving frown.

“You should know better than to keep me waiting, kid. This is dangerous territory for me.”

“Relax,” Sehun coaxed with a smile and leaned forward in his place to whisper.

“No one here knows that you are a hunter.”

“You don’t know that. I don’t want to get in unnecessary trouble so let’s just get to the business, okay?”

“Sure, but let me at least order something first.” Sehun grinned sheepishly when the elder male gave him a scowl.

“Please, I am famished.”

“I have already ordered for us.” Hawk conceded with a sigh before leaning back in his seat.

“Now, can we talk about the important stuff?”

“Fine.” Sehun agreed with a smile and slumped back in his seat as well.

“One of these days you would have to admit that you care about me.”

“Never happening.” Hawk denied instantly.

“Whatever sails your boat.” Sehun gibed with a snort before straightening up in his place again.

“So…why did you call me?”

“The Blue Moon is fast approaching.” Hawk stated gravely.

“I have been researching. Talking to people, listening in to their conversations, and reading an absurd amount of books, Sehun.”

“Okay…?” Honestly, he didn’t get what the other male was trying to get at.

“That means I am absolutely sure about what I am going to tell you. There are no questions and no doubts.”

“Hawk…what is this about?” Now, Sehun was starting to feel anxious.

“You need to shift this Blue Moon.”

“You know that it is not possible-”

“There is no space for buts or ifs.” Hawk asserted with a scowl and brought up one of his hands to massage his temple.

“At this point, I don’t care about what is possible or not. All I know is that you absolutely need to shift this year.” Sehun stared at the elder male in silent deliberation for a moment before releasing a frustrated sigh.

“What brought this on, anyway?”

Hawk didn’t reply immediately, instead, he released a sigh of his own and reached for something inside his pocket.

“I know you are afraid, Sehun.”

“I am not-”

“Don’t kid around with me.” The elder male called him out with a glare.

“We both know you are afraid of what will happen this Blue Moon and trust me, you should be.” He continued before slamming a piece of paper on the tabletop.

“What is this?” Sehun interrogated with a frown and hesitantly reached out for it.

“One of the cruelest ways to torture a Wolf.” Hawk replied blankly.

“Apparently, it is some kind of a top-secret among the most dangerous cults of hunters. I didn’t know something inhumane like this existed even when I am considered _the_ best…but then again I work alone and have never been the one for torture.” The elder male continued before shaking his head.

“But that is not the point.” Sehun gauged with a ticked brow.

“The point is,” Hawk emphasized strongly.

“You have been torturing yourself – in the severest way that is known to the hunters, for the past four years and you don’t afford to continue doing so anymore! You will kill your Wolf. _Heck!_ You will kill yourself and I am not speaking hypothetically or metaphorically. I am talking about facts.” The other male insisted before straightening up in his seat.

“Hunters have a very long history, Sehun and in that long history, this method of torture has never failed them. The animal inside you can’t stand being prisoned inside your human form when the call from that stupid Goddess is so strong. Some Wolves don’t even make it past a year before dying, some take two, and others three. You have been awfully lucky already, but the limit is five. You can’t take the risk any longer.” Sehun felt himself deflating at that. The thought of dying scared him. Despite all the pain, despite all the suffering, he wanted to live.

“What should I do…?” He wondered out loud miserably.

“I-I can’t shift, Hawk. It is too dangerous.”

“Tell someone.” Sehun looked up in indignation at that.

“What?”

“Tell someone, Sehun,” Hawk repeated before continuing solemnly.

“…or I will.”

“Are you threatening me?” Sehun can’t believe his own ears. The elder male has always been so supportive of him; from the very start, from the very first moment, he shifted to up till now. In fact, he was the only person beside Sehun, himself, who knew about the existence of the White Wolf. He was the only one who knew about what Sehun actually was.

“If that is what I have to do,” Hawk confirmed.

“Tell Baekhyun and Minseok about it. I am sure you can trust them. I am sure they will _help_ you. Meanwhile, I will continue my search too but…” The elder male trailed off with a long exhale.

“Sehun, I am not joking. If you don’t tell anyone within the next two days, I will go straight to your head Alpha. He might not be fond of me, but he knows I have helped you that night and I am positive that he will listen to me on this one.” Sehun felt tears forming in the corners of his eyes.

“I can’t.” He refused, appearing as pale as a ghost.

“ _You_ can’t! It will put their lives in danger. This is not a joke.”

“Do you think I take it as a joke?” Hawk demanded with a suppressed snarl.

“I, for a fact, know that this is not a joke, kid. Even if you were the one to kill him, I fucking saved you that night from that bastard who was trying to forcefully mate with you. I came running there to help you when I heard your distressed screams even if it was none of my business. _Fuck it!_ I was the one who told you to keep it a secret in the first place. I freaking continued with this bloody profession just because I wanted to keep you safe; just because I wanted to be your eyes and ears in the enemy’s territory so that I can always warn you. Do not fucking tell me it is not a joke! I know that better than anyone else – maybe even better than you.” Sehun looked down in shame.

“I know that.” He admitted with a guilty smile before tapping the tabletop with the tip of his fingers, restlessly.

“Sorry, I…panicked.”

“Sehun,” Hawk started again, this time a lot more gently.

“Please, think about it with a cool mind. After all, I have done to protect you I can’t have you commit suicide.”

“I will…I will do it, but I wasn’t kidding too when I told you it is risky; more than ever.” Sehun finally gave in, at least, for the time being.

“Because of the return of the leaders, I suppose?” Hawk guessed.

“Yes,” Sehun whined glumly.

“They are highly trained, Hawk. Ridiculously so. I feel like I am walking on the glass when I am around them. You don’t know how it is.” The elder male snorted at that.

“You are kidding, right?”

“Okay, Mr. Hunter, you might know it,” Sehun admitted with the roll of his eyes.

“I sure do,” Hawk affirmed and pulled his arms off the table when the waiter finally arrived with their order.

Sadly, Sehun has already lost his appetite.

“There is a rumor in our community that the head Alpha of this generation of Selene pack is one of the – if not the most – strongest. They say his training results thus far have been flawless. Not to say, he is the youngest head Alpha ever and the rest of his team of leaders…they are highly qualified.” The other male continued when the waiter has walked away.

“My people feel threatened.”

“Your people always feel threatened.” Sehun scoffed before picking up his fork.

“Besides, right now, Kim Jongin is a bigger threat to me than anyone else.” Hawk ticked a brow at him.

“Now, is he?” Sehun nodded his head with a groan and slumped a little.

“He…he knows that a White Wolf exists. He might know that it is somewhere in the pack as well. The worst thing is…he knows my scent so I have to hide it all the time now.”

“How did that happen?” The elder male didn’t seem as alarmed as he should have been in his opinion.

Sehun felt oddly affronted.

“I was out having a run in the woods because I haven’t for the past two weeks and I was so, so restless. He wasn’t supposed to be there. Jaehyun told me they would arrive in the morning, but when I was by the stream near the border, he was standing there on the other side. That stupid Silver Wolf!” He broke-off with an annoyed huff.

“I don’t know why he was there or from where he even came from, but…”

“But?” The elder male prompted.

“Do you know how big his Wolf is? It was…it was- how do you even explain it?” Sehun stuttered out, finding himself at a loss of words.

“It was...something else. The fur was shining under the moonlight. It was almost ethereal. I mean, I have seen Jaehyun’s Wolf before. I have seen many Wolves before, but Jongin’s was just so different – in a good way, you know. It was so imposing. And then his eyes…I swear to Selene it felt like he was seeing right through my soul. It was so scary…but mysteriously fascinating too. I haven’t been able to get that night out of my mind. I-I feel so damn conscious around him, Hawk. It is irritating. I have never reacted to anyone like this before. His gaze…his gaze! I-I feel it…” Sehun trailed off at the end of his sentence when he caught Hawk staring at him with an amused smirk.

“What is it, Sehun? Am I finally witnessing you rambling about an Alpha?” The elder male teased.

“I wasn’t rambling!” Sehun denied right away.

“I was telling you about how much of a nuisance he is.”

“Nothing of what you told me made him seem like a nuisance, kid.” Hawk pointed out smugly.

Sehun gave him a scowl.

“That is because I haven’t gotten to that part.”

“Well, get to it then.”

“You know how fast the stream in the woods flows, right? He was all the way on the other side. I couldn’t do anything about him seeing me because…well, it was already done, but I thought I was safe. I mean, I won’t dare step into that stream, but he walked in as if he was taking a leisure stroll in a park.” He was still not over it.

“And if that wasn’t infuriating enough he has an outrageously sharp sense of smell. It was raining so damn hard, but he still managed to follow the trail of my scent. I barely escaped from him. He was so close. A step or two more and he would have found me.” Thinking back on that night gave him chills sometimes.

“I told you he is very strong.” Hawk replied apathetically.

“Besides that, he has lived in the mountains his whole life. That stream should be a piece of cake for him. As for the scent…I am impressed though it is a problem for you.”

“I know~” Sehun sulked before finally taking a small bite of the smoked chicken breast placed in front of him.

“I would have been caught that night. It was really my true luck that he got a call from one of the guys.”

“Don’t worry. He has no reason to think that it was you.” Hawk consoled with a chuckle and dug into his food as well.

“I won’t be so confident about that,” Sehun grumbled under his breath and petulantly chewed on the meat in his mouth.

“Why not?”

“The day of the ceremony, he located my scent again. There were so many people, but he singled me out. Moreover, he caught me reading about White Wolves as well. I am the only one with supposedly no Wolf. It is actually surprising that he hasn’t put the dots together yet. From what I have heard, he is some sort of a genius; emotionally challenged, but still.” Baekhyun was the one who had given him the last bit of information.

“Then maybe it wasn’t your scent he trailed.” Hawk offered with a contemplative look on his face.

“It was raining, right? The ground must have been pretty muddy. I don’t think he followed your scent that day. It must have been your paw-prints.”

_Well…_

_That makes so much more sense._

It has never even crossed his mind.

“But that day in the ground…” Now, he was confused.

“Something about your scent must have caught his attention.” The elder male contributed again.

“Why would my scent catch his attention out of so many people?”

“I wonder why.” Hawk mused before eyeing him thoughtfully.

“Why was he following you that day in the first place?”

“I am the White Wolf.” That much was obvious.

“You have known him for a few days. Do you think he would chase down the White Wolf just because he wants more power?” Sehun shook his head at that. If there was one thing he was sure of, it was the fact that Minyoung and Jaehyun have raised their sons well. He was positive that Jongin didn’t have any malicious intentions that night. He would have smelled it on him.

“I will go more along the line of him being worried about a White Wolf being in his pack.”

“It could be, but why did he let you go?”

“He didn’t. I got lucky.” Sehun clarified before taking another bite.

“You told me he followed you all the way from the other side of the stream and was only a step or two away from catching you.” Hawk reiterated his words from earlier.

“Pretty much.”

“Let’s say he missed your trail somehow – though that is very unlikely – but he must have felt it when you stopped moving. It was common sense that you were nearby. If he was really that worried about the White Wolf why didn’t he stay longer to search? He could have ignored the call from his friend I am sure.” Sehun froze mid-bite.

“What are you trying to imply?”

“He knew where you were hiding that night, Sehun.” The elder male concluded, looking quite sure of himself.

“You didn’t escape from him. He let you get away.” Sehun felt chills crawling up his back.

“W-Why would he do that?” Hawk shrugged his shoulders in response.

“I am not sure, but maybe he didn’t want to scare you away or it could be that he didn’t want anyone else to find out about you just yet.” Sehun bit his bottom lip.

_This gives a whole new meaning to that night._

He wasn’t sure if it was a good thing or not.

* * *

  
Thanks a lot for reading! I hope you enjoyed it. Please let me know in the comments what you think because it is always fun ^^

Kudos are appreciated as well. 

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Twitter: [@exosangel7](https://twitter.com/exosangel7)

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	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so I know I said I will update on 15th Aug, but I managed to write a few chapters in advance for the fic and my exams are about to end in a few days. I am prepared enough for them so I thought why not post the chapter on this Sat than the next LOL!  
> I hope you guys will enjoy it!  
> Leave me with a lot of comments! I really miss them <3

“How troublesome…” Sehun grumbled under his breath with a tired sigh and absent-mindedly adjusted the knot of his bathrobe. Stepping inside his room, he gently closed the bathroom door behind himself and brought up one side of the towel, draped around to his neck, to rub his ringing locks dry.

It was quite late when he had returned home after meeting Hawk. The launch had been dead silent, devoid of any signs of life, which was pretty odd because it has been fairly active ever since the guys returned. Sehun had allowed himself to enjoy a few minutes of calm and silence – he had helped himself to a cup of tea – before he had paid a small visit to Minyoung’s and Jaehyun’s room to let them know that he was back.

He was hoping that the warm tea and a calming shower would help him relax his tense muscles and would stop his mind from racing, but it had all been in vain. He couldn’t stop thinking about what Hawk had said.

Sehun let loose another sigh.

_How am I supposed to tell Baekhyun and Minseok?_

His wet slippers squeaked against the wooden surface of the floor as he made his way towards the bed where he had earlier laid his pajamas.

_I don’t even know if I should…_

He had to though. By now, he had known Hawk well enough to tell that the elder male wasn’t joking around with him. If Sehun failed to tell his friends, he was sure that the hunter was going to make well on his threat.

_Ugh-_

“You have a way of making people worry about you.” Sehun jumped in his place, startled, and turned to face the direction the voice came from.

_The fuck?_

He suppressed a mortified scream, which _almost_ escaped his throat, when he saw Jongin – fucking _Jongin –_ casually sitting on the windowsill with one of his legs hanging out towards the hallway and the other inside his room.

“What…” He began in disbelief when the other male lifted his head off the ledge to face him and self-consciously pulled the robe closer to his body.

“What are you _doing_ here?” Jongin’s gaze quite literally dragged up his figure – he was sure that the stupid Alpha had no sense of shame – until their eyes finally met.

Sehun felt his skin involuntarily heating up when he saw the way Jongin’s lips tilted up in an appreciative smirk.

“I came to talk to you, of course.” The other male replied with the shrug of his shoulders before making a vague gesture in the direction of his bare thighs.

“Anyway, that bathrobe is a little too short on you, don’t you think so?”

“That is none of your business!” Sehun snapped with a flaming complexion and discreetly pulled on the seam of his robe so that it would cover more of his skin.

“Can you come back later…like when I am properly dressed?”

“I can,” Jongin acquiesced, suspiciously easily, before standing up.

“…but I won’t.”

“Why not?” Sehun seethed with a glare.

“I don’t see why I should.” The other male replied listlessly and walked closer to him.

“You came home pretty late.”

“So? How is that any of your concern?” Sehun objected with a frown.

“Mom was up waiting for you to come home,” Jongin informed with a frown of his own.

“You can stay out all you want, but tell her about it beforehand. She was worried about you.” Sehun felt his frown melting away.

“Oh…I will.” Usually, he did inform Minyoung whenever he was going to stay out late – which happened a lot because he was a medical student and he did spend a generous amount of time in some quiet corner of the town with Baekhyun mostly to study – but this time it has totally escaped his mind.

Moreover, he has been alone.

Baekhyun had left the hospital around seven to go home.

“Where were you anyway?” Jongin questioned with a curious tilt to his head.

“It is almost midnight.”

“I was in the library.” Sehun cursed himself the moment that lame excuse left his mouth.

Jongin raised a brow at him.

“I didn’t know that the campus library remained open till midnight.”

“I was at the hospital library.” Sehun clarified hastily and bit down on his bottom lip when he noticed that Jongin wasn’t convinced.

“Why didn’t you come home with Yixing then? He arrived just fifteen minutes ago.”

“Really?” He was starting to feel nervous now.

“I didn’t know he was staying late.”

“Funny,” Jongin considered with pursed lips.

“Yixing said that he met you around five and told you exactly that.” Sehun cursed mentally.

_He can’t just let it be, can he?_

“Must have slipped my mind.” He deflected in an off-handed manner, trying to act as indifferent as he could, before crossing his arms over the chest.

“This sounds peculiarly like an interrogation.”

“It might as well be,” Jongin admitted and took another step towards him with a cunning glint in his eyes.

“Excuse me?”

_What the hell is he trying to get at?_

“I was wondering,” The other guy started broodingly.

“How are you going to fit in this whole equation…a meeting with a renowned hunter at the café downtown?” Sehun felt himself going rigid almost immediately.

“Shocked, right?” Jongin goaded with a smirk.

“One of the Sentinels came to report a breach by the enemy. Imagine my surprise when it turned out he was meeting with you.” Sehun forced himself to stay put in his place when the other male once again took a step in his direction. He can’t believe Hawk has been careless enough to be spotted and trailed like that.

“Do you have an explanation for that as well or should I make an assumption? I have noticed you don’t like it when I do that.”

“You can do whatever you want.” The words were out of his mouth before he could think them over.

He necessarily didn’t regret them.

“I don’t owe you an explanation.” Jongin narrowed his eyes at him – it was pretty nerve-wracking since it really did feel like he was staring right through his soul – and suddenly reached out to take hold of his arm. Sehun let out a choked gasp when he was yanked forward without any warning and looked up at the other male with wide eyes.

_Fuck!_

_This is too close._

It was only then that he realized he was wearing no perfume at the moment and there was nothing covering his scent glands.

Plus, Jongin was in his room.

He must have recognized his scent by now.

_It doesn’t seem like it._

_Was Hawk right then?_

_Did he really follow my footprints rather than my scent that night?_

“What are you up to…?” It sounded more of a thought than a question.

Sehun blinked his eyes, befuddled when he caught a shadow of smile lining Jongin’s lips.

“You don’t want to tell me, right?” The other male continued contemplatively without waiting for a response.

“Fine. Have it your way. I won’t force you to.”

“Huh?” Sehun let out in confusion.

_Is he really giving up that easily?_

“I said, I won’t force you,” Jongin repeated with the roll of his eyes before letting go of his arm.

“But for Selene’s sake don’t get in any sort of trouble. I want to get initiated in peace.”

“Yeah…I will be careful.” Sehun concurred, feeling strangely mystified, and took a step away from the other.

“Is that all?”

“For now? Yeah.” Jongin avowed with a smug tilt to his lips.

“You might want to be more cautious from now on though. I am going to find out what you are hiding sooner or later. I am pretty good at it too.”

“Didn’t you say you were not going to force me?”

“It is not forcing you if I find it all on my own.” Sehun scoffed at the absurd reasoning – it wasn’t that absurd, but still.

“Thanks for the warning, I guess.” Jongin grinned at him arrogantly.

“Always.”

“You are annoying-”

“Jongin? What are you doing here?” Chanyeol’s incredulous question interrupted their little banter.

“Oh, Chanyeol.” Jongin languidly turned to face his best friend without an ounce of modesty.

Sehun on the other hand flushed red in shame.

“You are not asleep yet?”

“I came to talk to Sehun,” Chanyeol replied with furrowed brows and hesitantly shifted his gaze between a very nonchalant Jongin and a barely clothed Sehun.

“I was kind of expecting him to be alone and well…clothed.” His brother continued with a frown. The question in his eyes was very obvious.

Sehun closed his eyes in mortification.

_This is so embarrassing._

“Ah- you should wait outside for some time. He needs to get dressed.” Jongin’s _thoughtful_ advice only made the matters worse.

“I can see that,” Chanyeol responded exasperatedly and glared at his best friend.

“Why the hell are you in his room at this time of the night? He is not even properly dressed?”

“What are you getting so mad over?”

“Yah! Kim Jongin, are you being serious with me right now? Of course, I will get mad. He is an unmated Omega and you’re-”

“Both of you, get out!” Sehun demanded with a burning face.

“We will talk once I am dressed.”

…………

Jongin had already left for his room when Sehun pulled open the door again to let Chanyeol in.

Now that the moment of embarrassment has passed, he became fully aware of the strain in their relationship once again. For a second there, he wished that Jongin was still there, but then he realized that it would have only made it more awkward. Plus, the fact that a wish like that even crossed his mind didn’t sit well with his affronted consciousness at all.

“Hey.” Chanyeol greeted awkwardly once he was inside.

“You came home late today.”

“Yeah, I got caught up in the hospital library,” Sehun replied, sounding equally awkward, and shuffled towards his bed.

“You shouldn’t stay out this late,” His brother disapproved.

“Especially not alone. It is dangerous and you can’t even-”

“I know how to take care of myself. You don’t need to fret over it.” Sehun interjected curtly and sat down with a sigh.

“What is it that you want to talk about?”

“About…us?” Chanyeol answered with an uncertain smile.

“Us?” He repeated skeptically and looked up at his brother.

“What is there to talk about?”

“We both know there is a lot.” Chanyeol countered with a dry laugh and reluctantly sat down on the opposite edge of the bed.

“I am sure you have a lot of things to say to me. I know you have a lot of questions.”

“Even so,” Sehun maintained and stared down at his hands.

“Why does it matter? Why now?”

“I have hurt you, haven’t I?” His brother questioned instead of replying.

Sehun swallowed the lump rising in his throat.

“You have.” He confirmed truthfully in a small, croaky voice.

“Do you hate me?” Sehun didn’t give an answer to that.

_Do I?_

Chanyeol released a weary sigh.

“I never meant for it to be this way. I never wanted to hurt you.” His brother confided gravely.

“I know.” Sehun notified blankly.

“We hurt people when we hate them and you have made it pretty clear that I wasn’t even worth hating.”

“It was at no time about whether you were worth it or not. It wasn’t even about you. It was so much more.” Chanyeol contradicted solemnly.

“I wanted you to give up on me. I wanted you to stop caring. I wanted _myself_ to stop, but I never really could. No matter, how much I pretended it was still there somewhere at the back of my head, torturing me.”

“You had quite a long time to achieve that though.” Sehun scoffed bitterly.

“Nineteen years.”

“It was a long time, wasn’t it?” Chanyeol agreed before looking down at the floor. A small moment of silence passed between them before Sehun spoke up once more.

“Why?” It was barely audible, but it was still there out in the open for his brother to hear. He wanted to know it. He wanted to know the reason so badly. It ruined his life forever. He has a right to know what it was.

“What changed? We used to be happy. We were a happy family. Why did you change so suddenly?” Chanyeol didn’t give him a response.

“Chanyeol, I am asking you _why_?” Sehun insisted, this time a lot louder than he intended, and got up from his place to walk closer to his brother.

“You say…you say I wasn’t supposed to get hurt. That it has nothing to do with…me, but I-” The first tear flowed down his cheek.

“But it hurt me. It did…it hurt me so bad. It m-made me feel hopeless. It made me feel abandoned and unwanted. It made me lose faith in everyone! I felt like there was no one for me. I knew I had to take care of myself because when it really comes to it I will be left alone just like…just like-” He broke off with a sniff.

“People have priorities, right? I wasn’t anyone’s priority. I was lonely…so, so lonely. It changed me. It made me who I am –resentful, bitter, ungrateful, and broken.”

“Sehun-” Chanyeol called his name out in astonishment.

“I don’t even know who I am anymore.” Sehun shuddered and held onto his brother’s arm desperately.

“I used to be so happy once. I was so hopeful. All I ever wanted was to get my brother back. I wanted to make you proud. I studied so hard for it. I was ready to do anything, but why do I feel so resentful now? Why don’t I feel like it anymore? Why? What changed? Why did it have to be like this? I feel so angry at myself for complaining. Minyoung and Jaehyun have loved me so much, but at the end of the day…when it comes to it…they will always save their own son over me and the worst thing is- I can’t even hate them for it because it is their duty as a parent.” He jerked his brother’s arm angrily.

“Why did you do it? Why did you break your promise? I held onto it so hard. I was ready to forgive you for everything. I wouldn’t have even complained. I wouldn’t have even asked. I just needed you to be there. That’s all. Why couldn’t you put aside our differences for once? Why did you have to ruin it all?” Chanyeol looked down at his feet.

“I am sorry, Sehun. I am sorry for everything.”

Sehun let go of him with a sneer; feeling enraged that the reason still evaded him. Who was it that his brother wanted to protect so badly? Why can’t he just tell him?

“Your apology means nothing to me as long as you don’t tell me the reason.” Chanyeol didn’t give him a response.

“Why can’t I know?”

Still no response.

“Please…” Sehun knew he had lost the battle when his brother heaved a sigh – looking as remorseful as one person could – and got off the bed. However, he was immensely surprised when the elder male, instead of walking out the door, held onto his shoulders.

“I promise I will answer all your questions,” Chanyeol swore and gave him a crooked smile.

“Just give me some time. I need some answers myself before I explain anything to you.” Sehun didn’t have the heart to swat his brother’s hand away when he brought it up to lightly ruffle his hair.

“Sleep well tonight.”

He did not sleep well _at all_.

* * *

“Oh, hey! You are awake.” Sehun looked up from the folder in his hand towards Minyoung who was setting down a plate of pancakes in front of Jongin.

“Yeah,” He replied with a creased forehead and walked closer to her urgently.

“Why didn’t you wake me up? I have missed the first lecture already?”

“Baekhyun did try to wake you up.” She replied with pursed lips and mentioned for him to take a seat.

“Where is he?” Sehun did as he was told and took a seat next to Kyungsoo.

“He went to the University already.” Junmyeon was the one to reply since Minyoung has already moved back to the Kitchen.

“You had a pretty high fever in the morning. Baekhyun almost gave me a heart attack when he barged into our room seeking Yixing. We helped you to some medicine and then you went back to sleep.”

_When did this all happen?_

Should he be worried that he couldn’t recall a thing?

“You must be pretty out of it if you don’t remember anything,” Jongdae observed with a raised brow.

_It seems so…_

Sehun did know about the fever because he still had it and because he felt exhausted to his bones at the moment, but he had no recollection of the events in the morning. Moreover, he has no idea where the fever was even coming from.

“I do remember it.” He lied when he saw Minyoung walking in again with a concerned frown.

“The memory was a bit blurry, that’s it.”

“You seem to have a lot of issues with your memory since last night.” Jongin taunted drily while folding the newspaper in his hand.

“Weird, isn’t it?” Sehun made a face at him.

“Mind your own business.”

_He can’t give me a break even when I am sick._

“Sehunnie,” Minyoung sweetly broke into their conversation – he already knew what she was going to ask him for – and pressed one of her hands against his forehead with a smile.

“You still have a fever. Why don’t you take a day off today and rest?”

“You know, I can’t.” He declined with a sigh and poured himself some orange juice which took more effort than he would have liked to admit.

“Today is our first day of rotation in the CCU hospital. Dr. Lee instructed us to be there in time or there will be consequences. Plus, completing my required credit hours later would be a hassle. It is best that I go.” Minyoung’s smile melted away almost immediately though before she could say anything else, Yixing interrupted her.

“How are you feeling now?” The other male questioned the moment he stepped inside the dining area.

“Fine…more or less,” Sehun informed with the shrug of his shoulders.

“Nothing that I can’t handle.”

“Are you sure?” Yixing doubted with his head slightly cocked to the side.

“You gave me quite a scare in the morning. You were barely lucid and I couldn’t really tell what the cause was.” He broke off with a wince.

“Do you always get temperatures this high?”

_Oh, you have no idea._

“Sometimes,” Sehun provided hesitantly while carefully eyeing Minyoung.

“There is nothing to worry about. I will have Dr. Lee do a check-up to be sure when I meet him later. Besides, the temperature has gone down already.” Yixing looked at him silently for a moment longer before giving in with a nod.

“Make sure to see a doctor for a proper check-up, okay? Till then, take this medicine.” Sehun reached out to take the empty tablet strip that the other male was extending in his direction.

“I gave you the last tablet in the morning. So get some more from the University’s infirmary. It will keep your temperature down.”

“I will. Thank you.” Yixing gave him a smile as a response and finally took a seat next to his mate.

“You stayed out till late yesterday.” Junmyeon began after a short while of silence which made Sehun groan mentally.

“It was pretty chill. You might be coming down with a cold.” Jongdae released a snort.

“What are you talking about? We are Wolves.”

“Jongdae is right.” Kyungsoo agreed.

“Maybe it was something you ate.” Junmyeon scoffed at that.

“We are Wolves.” He mimicked his younger brother.

Sehun bit down on his lower lip to stop himself from laughing.

“Maybe it is his heat.” Jongin contributed before calmly flipping over to the next page of the newspaper.

“Isn’t being feverish normal in that condition?” The awkward silence that followed those words caused Sehun to color up a bit in embarrassment.

_So…shameless!_

“What are you saying?” Minyoung, at last, scolded her son with a scowl and snubbed him on the back of his head.

“Why are you hitting me?” The stupid Alpha complained, annoyance visible on his face, and put down the paper on the table.

“You shouldn’t talk about an Omega’s heat so lightly.” Minyoung retorted and pulled on his ear.

“When did you become so vulgar?”

“It is just a simple heat,” Jongin grumbled under his breath and jerked his head to the side.

“What is so vulgar about it?” Sehun wanted to whack the living daylights out of him.

_It is embarrassing you fucking idiot!_

“How would you feel if we suddenly start talking about your rut?” Minyoung reasoned with a glare.

“Why should I feel anything? It happens to all the Alphas.” Jongin argued with a scowl.

“Aren’t you guys too sensitive?”

“Yah! Kim Jongin.” The said male only rolled his eyes.

“Whatever. Finish your breakfast fast or else we will be late for our class.”

……………

_What the hell?_

It was the first thought that crossed his mind, the moment Sehun stepped out of the house and saw Kyungsoo and Jongdae occupying the back seat.

_There is no way in hell I am taking the front seat, especially when Jongin is the one driving._

“Sehun! Hurry. We are going to be late.” Jongdae called out with a cunning grin.

_He so did this one purpose._

_I can’t believe he is pulling my leg when I feel like shit._

“Why are you in the back?” Sehun interrogated with a glare and reluctantly made his way towards the car.

“Change the seats. Let me sit in your place.”

“Not a chance. Kyungsoo and I have to study. The back seat is more convenient for that. You should sit in the front.” Jongdae argued and threw open the book in his hand in order to make his point clear. Kyungsoo, on the other hand, just shook his head.

Sehun glowered at them.

“How is it more convenient-?”

“Just get in, will you?” Jongin demanded impatiently and turned on the engine of the car.

“I won’t feel sorry for leaving you behind.”

“I didn’t expect any better from you in the first place,” Sehun mumbled under his breath before petulantly pulling open the door and getting in.

“So bothersome.” Jongin nagged with an irritated frown and pulled down the hand-break.

“Are you going to put on that seatbelt or do I need to show you how to do it?”

“I am doing it. You don’t need to be so prissy.” Okay, maybe he had actually forgotten about it, but whose fault was that?

“What did you call me?”

“I called you what you deserved to be called.” Jongin let out an agitated huff.

“You are any-”

“Lord!” Kyungsoo exploded in annoyance.

“You two bicker like a mated couple.”

“As if I will ever want to mate with him.” Sehun quipped before crossing his arms over his chest.

“Who wants to mate with you?” Jongin shot back instantly.

“Just drive!” Kyungsoo burst out once again.

Jongdae broke down into a fit of laughter.

“I swear to Selene this is the best morning of my life.” Sehun turned around to glare at him.

“This is all your fault,” Jongdae smirked at that.

“Guilty as charged.”

“Shut it, Jongdae.” Jongin seethed before finally pulling out from the curb.

A somewhat (Sehun still threw occasional death glares at the arrogant Alpha from time to time) comfortable silence stretched after that.

Jongin had his focus completely on the road ahead. Kyungsoo and Jongdae seemed to be actually studying – he had thought that it was all a scam to make him miserable – which made Sehun wonder whether Jongin had to study too or not, but then he remembered that the other male was supposed to be some sort of a prodigy.

_He probably doesn’t need to revise._

Sehun too faced the window on his side and distractedly stared out of the glass. He still wasn’t feeling well. Actually, it seemed like the temperature was rising again because he felt a dull throbbing inside his head. At this rate, he might have to make a trip to the infirmary before attending his remaining lectures.

There was another matter of just where the fever was coming from. He wouldn’t have given it much of thought if he hadn’t had a whole memory lapse from it in the morning. Plus, Yixing said that it was abnormally high. Sehun did get high temperatures, but they weren’t at very convenient times which was why it sort of scared him. A fever out of nowhere when the Blue Moon was approaching didn’t seem favorable at all; especially after what Hawk had told him. Besides that, it was his first day at CCU which meant it would be hectic.

Being sick wasn’t going to help him.

Honestly, he hadn’t expected to shift rotations so soon – the previous rotation had about two weeks left – but then again there was no definite time set and Dr. Lee wanted them to start at CCU as soon as possible. He thought that they were already good enough and Sehun kind of agreed with him. Clinical rotations were pretty easy (at least for him) so he didn’t have much of a problem with that. Moreover, Dr. Lee did say that they needed some time of proper training before being assigned to the procedural wards.

_I need to tell Baekhyun and Minseok._

That again was something he had to worry about to a great extent. He had no idea how he was supposed to reveal such a big secret to them without instigating a negative reaction. He was sure that his friends were going to be hurt. He would have been too if he was in their place, but he had no choice – he was scared that they won’t understand that. Moreover, he was worried that they won’t agree to keep his identity a secret. He did not afford that at all costs.

There was also the matter of their safety that he couldn’t even begin to think about.

_There is too much to think about._

Sehun heaved a sigh.

He knew doubting Minseok and Baekhyun wasn’t fair to them. They have always supported him. Have even gotten in trouble for him. They have never given him a reason to be so scared of telling them the truth, but the fear remained. It plagued his mind and just won’t leave him alone.

“You are thinking so hard.” Sehun snapped out of his thoughts when he heard that remark and abruptly turned to face Jongin.

“I can practically hear it.” The tanned male continued when he gave him no response and effortlessly shifted the gear with one of his hands.

Sehun quickly averted his gaze when he found himself staring a second too long at the silver ring adorning the middle finger of the callous, veiny hand.

“That is not possible.” He countered weakly and pointedly looked out the window again.

“I can hear you sigh every other second though.” Jongin countered before sparing him a glance.

“It is kind of distracting.”

“Do you want me to apologize for that?” Sehun sassed grumpily – he can’t believe his treacherous mind thought that Jongin’s hands were _manly_.

“No,” Jongin, for once, didn’t retaliate and slowly brought the car to a stop.

“Give it to me.”

“What?” Sehun looked at him with furrowed brows.

“We are parked in front of a pharmacy.” Jongin emphatically gestured towards the building on their left and raised a brow.

“What do you think I am asking for?”

_Jerk._

Sehun cursed silently and wordlessly pulled out the empty strip of medicine that he has stuffed inside his bag previously.

“Aww~ are you seeing this, Kyungsoo?” Jongdae piped up from the back.

“Our Jongin is being caring right now.”

“I will be honest. That wasn’t something I was expecting.” Kyungsoo played along with an amused smirk.

“Don’t get too carried away.” Jongin deadpanned.

“He will most probably forget to take the medicine and get worse. Don’t know about you guys, but I don’t wish to have mom nagging me around the rest of the day because he is sick.” He went on before promptly getting out of the car.

“If that is what you want to believe.” Jongdae teased his younger brother and yet again broke down into a fit of laughter when Jongin, instead of replying, slammed the door shut.

“Don’t take him seriously, Sehun.” The devil turned towards him after he was done laughing.

“Okay…?”

“He tries so hard to act like an asshole, but he really isn’t,” Sehun ticked a brow at him.

“I am not too sure about that.”

“What he means to say _is,_ ” Kyungsoo intervened helpfully.

“Jongin definitely made this stop because he was genuinely worried. Don’t let him tell you otherwise.”

“I guess,” Sehun agreed awkwardly.

“I mean, he didn’t really have to…” Come to think of it, it really was a sweet gesture; especially coming from someone like Jongin.

He honestly didn’t know what to make of it.

“Take it.” Sehun snapped his head to the side just in time Jongin got inside the car and threw the bag of medicine towards him. He clumsily scrambled to catch it and muttered a curse under his breath when the bag ended up falling to his feet despite his efforts.

“Kyungsoo,” Jongin, surprisingly, didn’t make an insulting remark about his inability to catch things like Sehun has been expecting.

“What?” Kyungsoo’s answer was immediate.

“There is a sealed water bottle in the back pocket of my seat. Pass it to him.”

_What is he being so nice for?_

Sehun felt himself flushing a little, self-consciously, when he felt the heat of Jongin’s stare on himself.

_Why is he staring at me?_

“Here you go.” He took the bottle offered to him with a thankful smile and distractedly broke the seal.

Jongin was still staring at him.

It unnerved him.

“Are you not going to drive?” He couldn’t really help himself, could he?

“Take your medicine.” Was Jongin’s curt response.

_Then stop looking at me like that._

Sehun wanted to snap back, but instead, he popped the pill inside his mouth and ingested it with the huge gulp of water.

“As much as I am enjoying this,” Jongdae’s voice rang inside the car, finally delivering Sehun from the intense scrutiny.

“We are getting late for our lecture. In case you forgot, we have a test.”

“Shut up.” Jongin groused before starting the car again.

“It is not like you are going to do well on that test anyway.”

“Hey!”

* * *

The next chapter would be updated according to my usual schedule! 

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	9. Chapter 9

Two days.

It has been two days since he got the fever and it was still showing no signs of going away. Thankfully, the medicine that Dr. Lee has ascribed to him after the check-up has been doing a great job at keeping the temperature down, but it was never fully gone. Moreover, missing one dose of the medicine led to an insanely high fever which made his bones ache.

Sehun had no idea what was _exactly_ wrong with him – neither did Dr. Lee – though he has a very convincing idea that it was because of the Blue Moon. His doctor has the same suspicion as him (sadly he had no idea how to treat it) which only proved that Hawk wasn’t kidding around when he said that Sehun was practically committing suicide.

_Maybe he is right…_

_I need to be selfish._

He needed to tell Baekhyun and Minseok about who he really was. They will help him. Maybe they will be hurt and maybe they will be angry with him, but he knew that despite it all they won’t refuse to help.

_Would they keep my secret?_

With every day passing, the night of Blue Moon loomed like a deadly sword over his head. It felt almost as if someone has given him a death sentence and the fateful day was drawing nearer and nearer.

Sehun was scared.

_I need to tell them._

He will deal with the consequences later.

Right now, he needed to tell his friends. It was the only thing he could do because he has been ignoring Hawk’s texts and calls for the past two days. It could be any moment that the elder male would come barging inside the packhouse to spill his dearest secret.

“You have a test?” Sehun lifted his head up from the heavy book in his lap to look at Kyungsoo who was standing over him; conveniently blocking the Sun. Behind him stood, Jongin and Jongdae though they made no verbal greeting.

Not that he minded it.

“Yeah, in a couple of days. I was free right now so I thought I would do some revision now.”

“I see.” Kyungsoo acknowledged with a smile before placing down his bag and settling on the ground beside Sehun. Jongin wordlessly followed Kyungsoo’s suite.

_Their class must have just ended._

He noted mentally when Jongdae unattractively plopped down on the grass with a groan.

“Seeing that Baekhyun is finally studying, it must be a pretty important test.” Jongin jested and leaned his back against the trunk of the tree that was providing all of them with the shade.

“Not funny,” Baekhyun grumbled from where he was slumped before dejectedly straightening up in his place.

“The rotation at the CCU has been so demanding and exhausting. We barely get any breaks. Even the time at home, we have to spend it studying the cases we are shadowing. This test totally slipped my mind.” That was true. Like Sehun has predicted, the life at CCU was a lot more demanding than the normal hospital and it was only the beginning. According to Dr. Lee, once they have completed the mandatory one week of training, they would get tougher hours at the hospital.

It was after all their Surgical rotation.

Their shifts will start from 5 AM and end up most probably at 7-8 PM or up till 10 PM if they are on call. As much as Sehun was looking forward to being in OR with the surgeons, he wasn’t sure if his ailed body can handle it.

_Good grief._

Besides that, they would be working with the residents at the hospital too in the wards which was new and difficult because the residents at the CCU were particularly grouchy. He wasn’t sure how he was supposed to get through everything without collapsing, especially if the fever just won’t leave him alone.

“You should be happy this is your last test for a very long while.” Minseok remarked and patted Baekhyun on his shoulder in order to console him. It was another thing that it didn’t seem to work.

“Last test, my ass. Do you know how hard it is to be under Dr. Lee? He expects us to know everything and throws unexpected questions at us during the rounds. I failed to answer two of his questions already. Our team probably thinks I am a loser. The OR feels like it’s a battlefield. Everyone is so damn judgmental.” Sehun smiled at that. Dr. Lee indeed was a very strict professor.

“Last test?” Jongdae finally perked up.

“You guys won’t be coming to the University then? Yixing barely had classes once he started the last wave of the rotation.”

“Most probably.” Sehun confirmed with a wrinkled nose and capped the pen he was using.

“The hours assigned to us are unpredictable. They can be short one day and insanely long the other. I would like to come and study at the university library when we have some free time though. The end-of-rotation and final board exams are not going to get prepared by themselves.”

“Forget about that.” Baekhyun scoffed and put down his book.

“Our resident attendee is such an asshole. He arrives at the hospital at freaking 7 AM and expects us to be done with pre-rounding by then. Who does he think he is? Just because he is an Alpha doesn’t mean he can boss us around.” Sehun kind of agreed with that. Kang Jungo, third year in his residency, was prejudiced against Omegas in practice. It was so damn obvious from his behavior and sometimes made Sehun want to smack him across the face.

_I have known the guy only for two days._

“He is making it hard for us on purpose.” Sehun agreed with his friend and brought up a hand to massage his temples. His temperature was rising once again.

“Yah! Jongin. Won’t you do something about it?” Baekhyun demanded petulantly and jostled the said male with his arm.

“What can I do?” Jongin inquired with a frown and pulled away his arm.

“CCU is challenging. You knew that before going in there. It is all supposed to be a part of the experience. Why are you complaining so much now?” There was a _no-nonsense_ lilt to his voice as he ticked a brow at Baekhyun.

“Either do it properly or withdraw.”

“You are so cold.” Baekhyun retaliated with a frown and turned towards Sehun.

“Sehunnie! What am I going to do? I will fail this test and that stupid resident Kang would humiliate me to moon and back for it.”

“You should have studied before instead of playing video games.” Minseok piped in drily.

Baekhyun shot him a dirty glare.

“You won’t fail the test, Baek.” Sehun tried to pacify his friend.

“I will and then Kang will throw me out of the team.”

“That is not going to happen.”

“It will Sehunnie~” What was Baekhyun even going on about?

“We will never get to work together then.”

_He has been stressed._

Apprehension was coming off his friend’s body in waves.

_I can’t blame him._

Sehun let out a fond sigh and opened his folder to pull out the neatly made notes that he has prepared a night prior specifically because he knew this moment would come.

“Here you go.” Baekhyun halted his train of self-pity in order to stare at the notes.

“What are these?” His friend questioned while reluctantly reaching out to take it.

“Notes.” Sehun pointed out the obvious before going back to his book.

“I made them for you last night while revising. Go through them thoroughly and you should be fine in the test.” Minseok let loose a grunt; no doubt unhappy by the new development.

“Sehun, you are the reason why he is so damn spoiled in the first place. You always give into his whims.”

“He is cute.” Sehun justified with the shrug of his shoulders.

“Sweet Selene!” Baekhyun exclaimed in excitement – ignoring what was just said about him – while skimming through the notes.

Sehun suppressed his smile.

“They are so simple, detailed, and neat. Sehun! You are a lifesaver.” The shorter male continued and leaped forward to tackle him into a hug.

“What are you doing?” Sehun protested while scrambling away from his friend at the very last moment.

He could not in any way let anyone know that he was still having the fever. Minyoung would go crazy with worry if she ever even got to hear about it.

“Showing you my love, of course,” Baekhyun replied cheekily and once again attempted to hug him.

Sehun shoved him away with a scowl.

“Show it from afar.”

“No. Can’t do that.”

_Why is he being such a pest?_

“Baekhyun!” It was too late to move away now. Baekhyun was already all over him and judging from the way his grin completely wiped off to make way for concern, Sehun could easily tell that the other male most definitely hadn’t missed the fact that he was feverish.

“Y-You…You are burning.” All eyes were on him, almost immediately.

Sehun muttered a curse under his breath.

“It must be the Sun.”

“You do know I am training to be a doctor, right?” Baekhyun threw back sternly and reached out to feel his forehead.

Sehun sat in front of him helplessly.

“You definitely have a fever. It is pretty high too. What were you planning on doing about this?” He honestly liked it better when his friend was being childish.

“I am fine.”

_Let it be!_

“It has been two days since you got that fever and it still hasn’t gone away.” Disapproval was very obvious in Minseok’s voice.

“Sehun, what the hell are you thinking?” Sehun sensed frustration slowly welling up inside him. It wasn’t like he was suicidal and deliberately wanted to die. He knew it better than anyone else that the fever needed to go away at all costs. He knew what it meant, what it entailed, and what it was doing to him.

_But then again…_

It wasn’t fair to be annoyed at his friends. They were just looking after him. Sehun knew that they were only worried for him and after what happened last year he was sure he would have felt the same way if he was in their shoes.

“I am taking the medicine so it will go away eventually.” He mumbled under his breath, wishing that they could at least have this conversation when they are alone, and picked up his book – it has fallen off his lap when Baekhyun has pounced on him earlier – so that he would have something to look at.

“Don’t tell Minyoung. She would get all worked up for no reason.” An awkward silence followed his words.

Sehun could quite literally feel the heat of accusation in Baekhyun’s and Minseok’s eyes as they continued to wordlessly stare at him and nervously tightened his grip on the pen. He didn’t even dare to lift his head up.

“Ah~” Baekhyun was the first one to speak up.

“What to do? You are asking for such a big favor.” Sehun reluctantly turned to face his friend in confusion.

_What the hell is he talking about?_

Baekhyun looked at him with a mischievous grin.

“I don’t know about Minseok, but you would have to give me something to buy my silence, Sehunnie.” Sehun’s left eye twitched in irritation.

“I just saved your ass from failing.”

“That happened before you needed the favor from me.” Baekhyun sagely waved him off and held onto his left arm.

“Now you would have to do something for me.” How was that even fair?

Sehun gave his friend a glare and shucked his hands off.

“So…?” Baekhyun prompted, seemingly undeterred.

“What do you want?” He gave in grudgingly.

It wasn’t like he had any choice. Plus, Minseok was beginning to look amused by their little banter which was better than having him pissed. He was safe. At least for now.

“You know that Minseok is going to go to this camp with his classmates during the first week of December, right?” Baekhyun started with a frown and pointedly narrowed his eyes at Minseok.

“I do.” Sehun shook his head with a sigh.

“What are you going on about now?”

“You would also know that he won’t be there to help me through my heat this time.”

“How can I not?” Sehun questioned with a scoff.

“You whined about it for weeks when he told you that.”

“Well…I want _you_ to help me this time,” Baekhyun revealed with a toothy smile.

_Is that it?_

“You do know, you could have asked me to do that without making such a big deal out of it.” Sehun pointed out while rolling his eyes. The mischief in Baekhyun’s eyes grew.

It was practically twinkling by that point.

“I am not only talking about you keeping me hydrated and nourished.” Sehun kept silent, knowing very well what his friend actually meant. He refused to utter another word that might encourage the other, but in the end, it was all in vain. No one can deter the shorter male once he has started.

_I swear to Selene if he said something stupid in front of the guys._

“You are twenty-three! Since there is no one else, you might as well lose your virginity to mphh-” Baekhyun squawked at the end of his sentence when Sehun smothered his face with the book.

Loud laughter erupted around them.

“I am not helping you with any such thing.” He pressed bitterly and brought up his fist to snub Baekhyun on the back of his head when he succeeded in pushing the book away.

“But I have no one who will help me with my heat.” His friend whined stubbornly and latched onto his arm again.

“Minseok usually keeps me satiated, but he is going away. Come on, think about it. My mom said that the three of us would be spending our heats in the spare house that my dad owns from now on since there are ‘unmated Alphas’ in the packhouse _which means_ that you don’t need to be conscious about that as well. I know you are really shy and modest when it comes to this stuff. I also know that you like to spend your heats alone and you have this special sort of allergy towards nudity, but can’t you just-”

“Byun Baekhyun,” Sehun called out sternly with glaring eyes.

“I am simply saying that you-”

“Wait- you are _actually_ a virgin?” Jongdae interrogated, surprise fairly clear in his voice, while effective cutting Baekhyun off.

Sehun’s face flamed up in embarrassment.

“There is no need to look so surprised.” He retorted defensively and tried to calm his burning countenance.

“He is a virgin in _true_ sense.” Baekhyun expanded further on the topic; mischief glinting in his droopy eyes.

“I don’t think there is a single living person on this planet who has ever seen him without clothes which is ridiculous considering how more than half of the university wants to get inside his pants. Even I and Minseok haven’t seen him naked – not even _half_ – so forget about others.”

_Byun Baekhyun._

_So shameless!_

_I am going to beat him to death._

He vowed to himself mentally and looked up just in time to catch Jongin’s eyes. The other male had said nothing thus far to make fun of him – which was surprising in itself – and like others, he didn’t appear amused or surprised. In fact, there was no sort of emotion on his face. Sehun would have thought he was mad at him for something only if it wasn’t for his eyes that were, for a very inconceivable reason, glinting in…delight?

His heart conveniently decided to skip a beat or two.

_I must be seeing things now._

“Don’t get me wrong,” Kyungsoo’s voice forced him to tear his gaze away from Jongin.

“But you are pretty attractive. It is hard to imagine that you never liked anyone and at least one of them didn’t like you back.”

“I never really liked anyone,” Sehun responded truthfully.

“Why not?”

_Indeed, why not…_

_Maybe because I don’t want the whole world to know that I have a permanent scar on my side._

He frankly had no way to put that into words without revealing too much so he just shrugged his shoulders and scowled at Baekhyun when the other finally moved away from him.

“You know…” His friend huffed out with a crooked smile.

“He never confirms it, but I think he still didn’t have his first kiss- ah! Ah! Ah! My nose! I am sorry. Sehun, let go!”

“Byun Baekhyun!” Sehun was ready to commit a murder.

“How many times have I told you not to talk about stupid stuff in front of others? For once, can you act like a decent person? Don’t you have any shame?” He demanded fiercely and twisted the nose between his fingers. It was so damn satisfying to hear Baekhyun whimpering in pain.

“That is it. I am going to take those notes back. You can fail for all I…” Sehun broke off at the end of his sentence when he felt a sudden jot of pain at the left side of his head. Letting go of Baekhyun – who comically snuck away from him and dearly held onto the notes – he brought his hand up to massage his temple.

_What the fuck?_

Thankfully, the people around him were too busy laughing at Baekhyun to notice.

Or so he thought because when he raised his head (after the pain has ebbed away), Jongin apparently was still looking in his direction, and from the furrow between his brows, Sehun would assume that he hadn’t missed the way his face has scrunched up in pain.

_Oh, for Selene’s sake!_

_Give me a break._

“You never know when to stop, do you?” Minseok implored with a chortle and reached out to smooth down Baekhyun’s hair.

“He called me cute! How could I have known that he would do something so cruel to me?”

“Quit complaining.” Sehun snapped at his friend.

“You are lucky I left it only at that.”

“Sehunnie, you are no fun,” Baekhyun complained with a wrinkled nose and turned to face Jongdae.

“Anyway, how are things going for you guys? It has been a few days since you came here.” Sehun sagged in relief a little when the topic of conversation finally shifted away from him.

“Fine,” Jongdae replied off-handedly before grinning.

“I am enjoying all the attention from the Betas and Omegas alike.”

“Of course, you are.” Minseok taunted with a shake of his head.

“Hey! It is not my fault that people find me handsome.” Jongdae defended himself.

“Besides, I am not the only one getting attention. You should have seen that girl flirting with Kyungsoo yesterday.” The happy smile on Baekhyun’s face got wiped away instantly.

Sehun exchanged a careful glance with Minseok.

“She was pretty cute, wasn’t she Soo? You even flirted back.”

_Oh boy…_

_Jongdae shut up!_

_Wait-_

_He flirted back?_

“I did no such thing.” Kyungsoo, Selene bless him, denied right away before continuing.

“I politely told her to leave me alone because her stupid perfume was irritating my senses.” Strangely enough, he was staring straight at Baekhyun; as if the explanation was solely for him.

Sehun raised one of his perfectly shaped brows in interest.

“Why are you getting so defensive?” Jongdae inquired with a cunning smirk and slowly trailed his eyes towards Baekhyun who was looking down at the notes in his hands, almost as if they were the most interesting thing in the world.

“You can flirt. There is nothing wrong with it.”

_He is pushing it on purpose._

That much was clear.

“No one is going to judge, right Baekhyun-”

“Jongdae, stop being a pest for once.” Jongin cut his brother off with a frown; most probably he didn’t fail to notice how uncomfortable Baekhyun and Kyungsoo looked at that moment.

“What?” Jongdae retaliated with an offended expression.

“I was just asking-”

“I said stop it,” Jongin repeated himself – this time more firmly – and glared at Jongdae so fiercely that the latter immediately fell silent.

“Fine! I will be a pest to you then.”

“You can try.” Jongin goaded with the shrug of his shoulders. His jaw looked especially sharp from where Sehun was sitting and the occasional rays of Sun that sneaked past the rustling leaves to shine on the other male’s face made him seem more ethereal. It took Sehun a moment too long to realize that he was staring at Jongin – he can’t believe he was staring at _Jongin_ out of all the people – but thankfully he caught himself in time and averted his gaze away before anyone else could notice.

“Are _you_ going to call that guy with the blonde hair? What was his name again?”

“Taeho,” Kyungsoo added in helpfully when Jongdae turned to face him for assistance.

“Yeah, Taeho,” Jongdae confirmed before smirking at Jongin.

“He appeared pretty adamant on taking you out on at least one date and let us be frank, he was rather hot.” A pang of irritation hit Sehun straight in the middle of his chest as soon as he heard that.

_What the hell is wrong with me?_

Why were they even talking about who asked who out? Why didn’t Jongdae have any other topic to discuss? Why was the other male being such a menace and why was he feeling annoyed? Jongin can date whoever the hell he wants. When did he start caring about it?

“Really?” Minseok questioned with a frown and looked at his brothers with knitted brows.

“Doesn’t he know that Jongin has a destined mate?”

_Oh, yeah…_

Sehun, honestly, had completely forgotten about it which wasn’t that surprising since the topic of the future Head Alpha’s mate was something that was rarely discussed in their household for very obvious reasons.

All Wolves were allowed to choose their own mates. They were allowed to like, court and mate with whoever they wanted. Fate, nature or Selene played no role in it, but the Silver Wolf – the Head Alpha of the Selene pack on whom the future of their pack depended – being very special and one of a kind has a destined mate that was specifically decided (no _made_ ) for him or her by the Moon Goddess herself.

Jongin, of course, as per tradition has a destined mate too though he was different from all the previous Head Alphas in some aspects. There was the fact that he was the youngest Head Alpha to be in the history of their pack. At the mere age of twenty-three he was to take over all the control from his father; at least as far as the responsibilities of the pack were concerned. He wasn’t sure about the Kim family business because Jongin still hadn’t graduated from the Academy with the degree, but considering that he was a prodigy, Sehun won’t be surprised if the other male took accountability of the family business as well even before completing his studies.

Suddenly, Jongin’s words from their fight back in Jaehyun’s office came back to him.

_“The Blue Moon is less than a month away, Alpha.”_

He vividly remembered the frustration on the other male’s face.

_“You have been in my place once. You know how much work-load, pressure, and expectations are there._

Jongin knew he wasn’t fully matured. He wasn’t fully _prepared_ to take complete control over from his father because there were somethings that one could learn only from time and experience. Normally, the usual age for a Silver Wolf to take charge was well over twenty-seven or twenty-six – when he/she has considerably matured and mated with his/her destined other-half already and has at least produced one heir – but Jongin’s birth was late.

According to how things have worked for over centuries, the shift of power from one Head Alpha to the other must take place every thirty years which didn’t play well in Jongin’s favor at all. He was the third born and has almost a six-year age gap from the eldest child of the house. From what Sehun has heard from Minyoung, the Silver Wolf was mostly the firstborn child of the Head Alpha which was why all of them had been greatly surprised when back then Junmyeon shifted as a brown Wolf rather than a Silver one.

“Everyone knows Jongin has a destined mate, but when has that ever stopped anyone,” Kyungsoo remarked with a snort.

“Besides, we still haven’t found his mate so technically he can go out with anyone he wants. At least to have some much-needed fun.” Jongdae wiggled his brows suggestively which only caused Jongin to roll his eyes.

“I had my fair share of fun before the elders prophesied my mate’s mark. You don’t need to worry about that.” Sehun pointedly stared down at his book and tried his best to curb the urge which was strongly inciting him to simply get up and walk away. He didn’t even know why he was reacting the way he was.

He didn’t even care about Jongin for the sake of Selene!

“It has been almost three years since they began the search for your mate, but there are still no signs. The authorities have checked every single Wolf in our pack for the mark. People have started to speculate that your mate isn’t from the Selene which has never happened before.” Baekhyun pointed out with pursed lips.

It was true.

When the Silver Wolf turned twenty, the Seer of the pack (a very well respected elder Wolf) always got some kind of a vision - a blessing from the Moon Goddess – of the future Head Alpha’s mate which in turn supplied them with a hint or a mark that they could later on use to find the said mate. Jongin, however, has been unlucky in that department as well because even though there was a prophecy and a vision, his destined other-half was still missing. It was a matter of great concern for everyone in the pack, especially the elder Wolves since they held the belief that one generation of late birth was already a threat to the safety of the pack and they absolutely couldn’t afford another one which in other words meant that Jongin’s mate needed to be found fast and they needed to produce an heir as soon as possible.

_That must be pressurizing._

“That still doesn’t give me an excuse to cheat on my mate. I know that they are out there somewhere. I can’t be with someone else with that knowledge on my conscience.” Sehun snapped his head up in surprise. Those were strangely warm and sincere words; the two emotions that he has never thought about associating with Jongin.

“I would like to stay loyal to my mate.”

_Right…_

Loyalty. That was the word best used to describe what the other male has just expounded.

It was a strange concept to Sehun though.

Could someone be loyal to a person that they have never seen or met? Was knowing that they were out there somewhere reason enough? Furthermore, to be loyal there must be a solid motivation. What was Jongin’s? Did the other male love his mate? Was that even possible? To love a stranger who could be anyone out of the thousands of people around you…it didn’t make any sense to him. Maybe Jongin’s loyalty was out of duty, an obligation to be with his destined mate only because pursuing a relationship with someone else would just be a waste of time. In the end, at any cost, he was supposed to be with the person that Selene has decided for him.

_Then again…_

_I don’t know anything regarding this whole ‘destined mate’ matter._

No matter what Jongin’s reason was, he still admired him for it.

“Your mate is a lucky person.” That was not supposed to be voiced out loud. Oh, no, it was not meant to reach any ears; not that day, not ever. Sehun resisted the urge to close his eyes in mortification when all attention turned towards him; some looking amused and others shocked.

Jongin, out of all, looked especially stunned.

He couldn’t really blame the other male for that.

“I-I mean,” Sehun continued, trying to appear as indifferent as he could, given the situation, and casually looked down at his book; as if he wasn’t mentally murdering himself over the embarrassing slip up.

“The loyalty is admirable. Not a lot of people have that in themselves, especially for someone they haven’t even met.”

“Who said I haven’t?” That questioned seemed to have shocked everyone more than his compliment earlier.

“You have met your mate?” Jongdae all but screeched, looking like someone has socked him in the face.

Jongin just shrugged his shoulder.

“Who knows? Maybe we have met and I just don’t know it yet.” For some reason, Sehun had a feeling that there was more to it, but that was simply absurd because there was no way for him to know that.

He didn’t even know Jongin properly.

“Geez! You gave me an almost heart-attack.” Jongdae claimed sourly and sagged against the trunk.

“I really thought our years’ long search was over.”

“It would…when the right time comes.”

No one really asked Jongin what he meant by that.

* * *

  
Jongdae’s and Kyungsoo’s question earlier about why he never found anyone attractive bothered him greatly; to the extent that he wasn’t even able to sleep.

Okay, that was utter bullshit.

He wasn’t able to sleep because there was a dull ache in his head that wasn’t going away. Moreover, it seemed like the medicine that Dr. Lee has given him for his condition was staring to get ineffective because his temperature hadn’t gone down the whole day despite taking the dozes on time.

Sehun knew that his clock was ticking and it was ticking very fast.

He needed to do something about the day of the Blue Moon. Hawk was right that he absolutely needed to shift this year. It was easier said than done though. The other male wanted him to share his secret with Baekhyun and Minseok fast, but Sehun couldn’t just bring himself to do it. It wasn’t fair to them. He couldn’t compromise their safety for his own sake. It was selfish and he wasn’t; that was the whole damned problem.

He has given it a lot of thought and reached the conclusion that something else needed to be done. Telling Baekhyun and Minseok about anything was out of the equation and he had informed Hawk of it already earlier in the noon when he had finally mustered up the courage to speak up to the elder. Surprisingly, the other has been pretty understanding. He had even admitted that pressurizing Sehun was wrong on his part, but he had also remained firm where he needed to be.

Sehun had two more days to come up with a working plan or else Hawk was going to pull through with his threat.

That was fair enough.

He didn’t really mind it because he already had a plan. It was a bit risky, but a lot better than revealing his secret to anyone–

“You will burn your hand.” Sehun was pulled out of his thoughts when a sudden warmth enveloped his right hand and hindered it from proceeding further. Looking down in surprise, he sucked in a breath when he realized that his fingers were about to touch the steel pot that currently had boiling water in it for his herbal tea.

“Oh, thanks.” He expressed, admittedly a bit dumbly, before pulling his hand out of Jongin’s grasp who was, strangely, looking at him with a blank expression on his face.

“You have a fever.”

“Yeah, it just came back-”

“It never really went away, right?” Sehun snapped his mouth shut instead of answering. He knew by that point lying was totally futile.

“I thought so too.” Jongin quipped before making a vague gesture in the general direction of the stove.

“Turn off the flame. Your water has boiled enough.”

“Uh…yeah, just a moment.” Sehun croaked out awkwardly, feeling a bit disoriented by the fact that the other male had let the whole matter slip away so easily (it was pleasantly surprising), and reached out for the pincers to pull off the hot kettle from the stove. Once done with the task, he next reached out for one of the top cabinets, pulled out a black mug for himself, and after a very brief, but serious moment of contemplation decided to pull out its twin mug as well. There was a slight moment of hesitation from his side before Sehun cast a wary glance in Jongin’s direction.

Much to his chagrin, the other male was staring right back at him seemingly indifferent to the fact that his intense scrutinizing was very much obvious.

“Do you w-want some?” Sehun offered weakly and absent-mindedly fiddled with the glass jar that held the tea-packs.

“I guess, it would be relaxing.” Jongin accepted – much to his surprise – and casually moved over to sit on one of the bar-stools. Sehun stared at him dumbfounded for a second or two and only turned towards the task at hand when the other cocked his head to the side as if asking him why he was standing like a statue in the middle of the Kitchen.

_What has gotten into him?_

_Forget it!_

_What has gotten into me?_

The silence stretched between them for the next few minutes as he tried, in vain, to go about his business while pointedly ignoring the looming presence of the certain Alpha in the Kitchen. He couldn’t exactly make out why, but for some reason, he was growing rapidly nervous in the other’s presence. It was honestly maddening and Sehun wanted to do nothing more than to bang his head against the wall. Sadly, he couldn’t really do that without coming off as mad, so he just finished brewing the tea and placed the piping hot mug in front of Jongin who accepted it with a thankful smile.

“Why are you awake this late?” The other male inquired, most probably for the sake of breaking the somewhat stifling hush around them.

Sehun shrugged his shoulders as a response before taking a seat as well.

“I was feeling restless.” He brought the steaming mug up to his lips to take the first gratifying sip of his tea, in hopes that it would help him settle down for the night, and looked at the other curiously.

“What about you? Did you sneak out tonight as well?” Jongin snorted before taking a sip out of his own mug too.

“Where did you get that idea from?”

“I may not be a genius prodigy,” Sehun started with a faintly conspiring smile and drummed the fingers of his free hand on the countertop.

“But I am still pretty smart, you know? Going out _alone_ late past the middle of the night without telling anyone and coming back quietly like thieves smelling of the woods…if you ask me it is a total give away.” Jongin stared at him wordlessly for the next few seconds before he shook his head with a breathy chuckle.

“You got me there.”

“So you really do sneak out?”

“I thought you were pretty confident about it.” The other male challenged making Sehun roll his eyes. He once again brought his mug up to take another calming gulp of his beverage before responding.

“Who is it that you sneak out for?” Jongin raised an imploring brow at him; his eyes betraying peaked interest.

“Now, what gave that away?” Sehun mulled over the question for a while before smirking at the other.

“Nothing. I was just messing with you though it is interesting to know that you sneak out to meet someone.”

“I never said that.” Jongin contradicted, not appearing fully convinced with his answer.

“In fact, I go out to search for someone.”

_I know._

“In the middle of the night?”

_Why did you let me go that day?_

“Is there a problem with it?”

_If you wanted to get hold of the White Wolf this badly then why did you let me escape?_

“It is a very peculiar timing, don’t you think so?” Sehun knew that he was trudging along the edge of very dangerous territory, but he needed to know _why._

“The person I am searching for is very peculiar.” Jongin paused to take another sip before shooting him a crooked smile.

“You make them sound very interesting.” He didn’t really know what else he was supposed to say. Whatever came to his mind threatened to reveal his secret.

“Maybe they are. I can’t really say.” The other male intoned and distractedly traced a finger along the rim of his mug.

There was a pleasant lull in their conversation for some time –which they peacefully spent enjoying their respective drinks – before Jongin eventually spoke up again.

“Chanyeol came to talk to you that day. How are things going on between you two?”

“He didn’t tell you?” Sehun questioned with a furrow between his brows.

“I thought you were his best friend.”

“Everyone has their secrets. I have mine too. It’s just that he has been oddly evasive lately which is why I am asking you in the very first place. I usually don’t like to interfere, but it is concerning how he has been so spaced out.” Jongin elaborated with a frown before looking at him.

“Did something happen between you two?”

“Not something that would cause him to react like that. We ended things on quite a positive note that night.” Sehun replied with pursed lips, feeling a little concerned.

“Maybe it is the pressure of the initiation ceremony?” The other male looked visibly doubtful, but he still reluctantly nodded his head.

“He did seem quite stressed for the past few days.” He acquiesced with a grunt.

“It isn’t over the initiation though. He has been losing hair on his head ever since you and Baekhyun started working at the CCU.” Sehun laughed at that breathily.

“I will take that he doesn’t like it for the same reasons as Minyoung.” Jongin nodded his head in confirmation before thoughtfully narrowing his eyes at him.

“Honestly, the other guys have their own concerns as well. You’d be surprised to know how many of them want you two to pull out of CCU.”

“Really?” That for sure was surprising since no one has ever talked to him or Baekhyun about it except for Minyoung.

“I had no idea.”

“Yixing is the most concerned; maybe even more than Chanyeol and that is saying something. I am sure he has talked to Baekhyun about it already.”

“Why didn’t he say anything to me?” Sehun asked with a wrinkled forehead.

“You aren’t exactly approachable.” Jongin reasoned bluntly.

“I am not sure if you know this, but there is this shell around you that stops others from _seeing_ you. The guys, they don’t know what to make of your personality. They simply don’t understand it. Even Jongdae tends to be careful when it comes to you. In fact, they tread so cautiously around you that despite how much we fight, they all still asked _me_ to talk to you about this whole CCU matter when Baekhyun refused to relent to their reasoning.” Sehun fell silent almost instantly. He knew that it was the truth because he has deliberately built that shell around him. However, he didn’t know that it was so obvious and warding others off him.

“I see.” The other male observed him intently; appearing unsatisfied with his curt response.

“Why are you so closed off?” It took Sehun a moment to form an answer to that question because he was truly caught off-guard.

“That is…just who I am.”

“You used to be different.” Jongin pointed out persistently.

“Everyone changes. I did too.” Sehun replied elusively before clearing his throat.

“What is so wrong with CCU anyway?” He interrogated in order to divert the topic away from himself. If the other male noticed his very noticeable attempt, he didn’t point it out.

“You know it already,” Jongin answered with a knowing look in his eyes.

“Dad may support you and really I agree with him too. You guys are not kids anymore and should be able to make your own decisions. It is all part of the experience, but no matter what anyone says, CCU is a dangerous place to work in. It is not only filled with criminals but…”

“But?” Sehun encouraged the other to continue.

“Why did you chose CCU out of all places?” The other male mused instead of continuing with his earlier words.

“You and Baekhyun are brilliant students. You could have gotten great success in any normal hospital. Why chose the most dangerous and demanding unit of the medical field then?”

“Truth be told, it was Baekhyun who came up with the idea.” Sehun divulged with a small smile earning a snort from his late-night companion.

“Of course, it was Baekhyun. Trouble is his second name.”

“He is ambitious.” He defended his friend before continuing.

“Something that I am not, but I want to be.” Jongin simply raised a brow at him.

“You may not understand me,” Sehun continued contemplatively. “After all, we are at the opposite ends of the spectrum. Our roles, the things that are expected from us are very different. You are supposed to lead this pack, be a decision-maker, a risk-taker; always alert and ready to think out of the box.”

“You can do all of that too.”

“I might as well be a complete contradiction to it.” Sehun denied with a snicker.

“All my life, I have always limited myself. I have always set boundaries and rules; have always stayed in my comfort zone. I like to feel secure. I like things to be predictable. I like to have control, especially over the things that are happening in my life and I guess somewhere in the effort of doing that I had killed my ambition entirely. Working in CCU brought some of it back in my life. It allows me to step out of my comfort zone, but in a systematic and controlled manner; in a way that doesn’t make me want to just quit everything and hide in my room. I _need_ this.” Jongin watched him silently for a moment, looking deep in thoughts (almost as if he was trying to come to a conclusion), before he took one last gulp of his tea and gently placed the empty mug on the counter.

“If this is what you _need_ then you should pursue it by all means. I will talk to my mom and others, but in turn you and Baekhyun would have to promise us to take care of yourselves. You go to CCU daily and should already know that it is greatly dominated by Alphas. Work place harassment is a very common thing there, Sehun. Others are not wrong in their concerns as well. They are just scared that something would go awfully wrong. Dr. Lee can’t always keep you guys safe.”

“I think we can manage that much.” Sehun surrendered, feeling extremely relieved that at least there was someone, other than Jaehyun, in the pack-house who understood him and Baekhyun to some extent.

“I will count on it then.”

* * *

Hey! 

I hope you enjoy the little heart-to-heart (LOL, kidding) that Sekai had in this chapter. 

Please comment and let me know what you think about this chapter. It really helps me write ^^

Kudos are appreciated.

Thanks a lot!

You can follow me on: 

Twitter: [@exosangel7](https://twitter.com/exosangel7)

Curious Cat: [exosangel7](https://curiouscat.me/exosangel7) if you have any question regarding the fic ^^


	10. Chapter 10

“No.” All hopes of his alternative plan regarding the night of the Blue Moon working abandoned Sehun the moment that single word of denial left Jaehyun’s lips.

“But Alpha-”

“I said no.”

_He didn’t even think about it for more than a second._

Sehun sulked mentally and narrowed his eyes at the Head Alpha as if that would somehow change his mind; unfortunately, it didn’t.

“Why not?” He just wasn’t about to give up so readily. He had a lot riding on it. If the plan that he came up with failed even before he executed it then he would have no other choice than to tell Baekhyun and Minseok about his true identity; which was, of course, something that he wanted to avoid at any cost.

“Your Head Alpha is right. You shouldn’t be away from home on the day of the Blue Moon.” Minyoung, sadly, wasn’t on his side as well. He didn’t expect her to agree anyway. After what happened last year he was sure that his family would never allow him to go out of their sights, especially at the dreadful day of the Blue Moon itself.

He still has to give it his best though.

“I will talk to your uncle myself. I am sure he will understand why you can’t come to visit him.” There was no doubt his uncle would understand. After all, Sehun was the one who asked him to extend an invitation in the first place.

“Besides, this Blue Moon is special. You should stay here.”

_It isn’t like I am going to be able to attend the initiation anyway…_

“I haven’t met Donghae for almost a year, Minyoung.” He protested with a frown and avoided Baekhyun’s gaze when his friend attempted to catch his eye. He knew that Minseok and Baekhyun were at that moment immensely confused over his insistence – he hadn’t even talked to them about it before raising up the issue directly with Jaehyun – and they only refused to say anything because the rest of the guys were present in the launch as well.

“You can go to his pack some other time, Sehun.” Minyoung asserted tersely and shot him a warning glare.

“There is no need for you to be so stubborn about it.”

“I am not being stubborn! We are getting a few days off the CCU before the Blue Moon. I don’t know when I will get the chance after that. I don’t see why I can’t _go_.” He knew exactly why he can’t go.

“Enough!” Jaehyun growled while staring at him piercingly. Sehun rarely ever got to be at the receiving end of that scathing gaze which was why he wasn’t surprised when a part of him urged him to simply give up while he still had time.

“I said you can’t go and that’s it. I am not going to change my mind under any circumstances so stop pushing it.”

“I really want to go…” Sehun weakly persisted despite the way his Wolf was trying to make him back out and obey the command of such a powerful Alpha.

“Donghae said he has some of dad’s stuff that he wants to give to me before he leaves the town for a few months. I won’t be able to catch him later on.” That was his last resort. He really hoped that it would work.

“I will send someone else to get that stuff for you.” It really was a lost cause. Normally, Baekhyun and Minseok would have helped him in persuading the Head Alpha, but they didn’t dare speak a word this time which meant that they were against him leaving as well.

“Fine.” Sehun snapped with a scowl, feeling irritated beyond belief, and got up from his place.

“Sehun-” Minseok started, but he was way too angry to listen to anyone.

“Do as you please.” He continued, ignoring his friend pointedly, and petulantly stormed out of the launch.

“What has gotten into him?” Baekhyun’s confused inquiry was the last thing he heard before he closed the door of his room.

* * *

Sehun knew that he was being irrational. He had no right to snap at Jaehyun like that – he was feeling so bad about it – and he really didn’t have any right to create such a scene over such a small thing. 

_I am such a drama queen._

What he did down in the launch was childish and embarrassing. Honestly, he has no idea why he reacted so strongly, but it might have to do something with the fact that his deteriorating health over the course of the past whole week has made him extra touchy and sensitive.

He was sick, exhausted, and miserable.

_Stupid fever._

Dr. Lee has increased the potency of his medicines, but really by that point, nothing was working in his favor. No matter what he did the temperature simply didn’t leave him alone and with every passing day it kept on getting worse. His mentor has actually been worried that with how rapidly his condition was worsening, in a matter of a few days, he might end up being hospitalized.

Sehun didn’t even want to think about it.

Hawk, on the other hand, has been pretty convinced that his sickness before Blue Moon is his last warning from his Wolf which brought them back to the same old topic of how Sehun needed to absolutely shift. 

“Sehun.” The sudden knock on his door snapped Sehun out of his reverie and impelled him to face the entrance of the room.

“A-Alpha.” He stuttered out when he saw Jaehyun standing at the threshold.

“Can I come in?”

“When have you ever asked before?” Sehun inquired timidly and brought his legs up to hug them to his chest.

“I figured that you might be mad at me.” The Head Alpha responded before slowly walking inside. There was an awkward pause before he finally spoke up again.

“About what just happened-”

“Sorry,” He interrupted the elder male with an apology and buried his chin between his knees in shame.

“I shouldn’t have spoken to you like that.”

“Do you want to talk about it?” Of course, Jaehyun knew that something else was the cause of his unusual outburst.

He always knew.

“I am scared…” Sehun admitted truthfully and felt hot tears slowly welling up in his eyes.

“I am tired of being sick, Alpha. The temperature won’t go away. It’s been a week. I can’t take it anymore. Every fiber of my body hurts. I haven’t slept well in days and it still keeps on getting worse. I am tired of acting like everything is fine in front of others when I just feel like collapsing.” A gentle hand came down to settle on his head.

Sehun allowed the first few tears to flow down his cheeks.

“I-It terrifies me. After what happened the last year…this is way more intense. I won’t survive it this time, Alpha. I will die.”

“You won’t.” Jaehyun contradicted without missing a beat and brought his other hand up to wipe away his tears.

“Nothing of the sort is going to happen. I won’t let it.” Sehun wished he could have that confidence.

“Dr. Lee said that he might have to hospitalize me in a few days.” The elder male’s brows furrowed right away. There was a flash of immense concern in his eyes before he masked it away.

“How will you explain things to Chanyeol then?”

“What do you mean?” Jaehyun questioned with a frown.

Sehun shrugged his shoulders.

“The guys don’t know anything about my condition and I would like to keep it that way for as long as possible. If I get hospitalized, Chanyeol just won’t stay silent. He would demand to know the reason.”

“We will tell him the true cause. There is no point in lying or hiding. They will get to know about it later if not sooner. You can’t hide your condition on the Blue Moon from them.” That was reasonable enough, but Sehun still felt apprehensive.

“That is why I wanted to go visit Donghae. I still think you should let me, at least for this time around. The guys are going to get initiated this Blue Moon. It is a special occasion for them. I don’t want to ruin it by making them worried about something that couldn’t be helped.”

“Sehun I will never let you out of my sight in such a vulnerable and dangerous condition. Stop trying to convince me because I am not going to listen.”

_At least, I tried._

* * *

  
He was going to tell Baekhyun and Minseok. There was no other choice left and what time was better than the present. Okay, that wasn’t exactly true, but he was indeed going down to the launch where everyone was gathered – it was almost time for the dinner – to ask either Baekhyun or Minseok to meet him early in the forest the next morning; preferably before they left for the hospital and University respectively–

“You know, only you can shout at my father like that and then get away with it.” A familiar deep, honey voice remarked as soon as he stepped inside the patio.

“I am starting to suspect that you two have been hiding something big from everyone.”

Sehun turned towards his addresser with a brow ticked in a challenge.

“Jongin,” He acknowledged blankly and crossed his arms.

“Were you standing here waiting for me to come down just to say that?” The other male shot him a smirk and elegantly pushed his back off the railing that he was previously leaning against.

“It was a long wait.”

“You could have come to my room if it was that important.” Sehun has no idea what direction their conversation was headed in. Actually, he has no idea why they were even talking. Last night had been weird. He couldn’t believe that he had opened up to Jongin the way he did. He couldn’t believe just how easy it had been to talk to him once they had overcome the initial awkwardness. Ever since the day Jongin came back to the town they have been nothing, but hostile towards each other. Their little tea party in the middle of the night yesterday was enigmatic in true essence. It was strange, to say the least and left him puzzled; a lot like that odd connection he had felt with the Alpha back that day in Jaehyun’s study.

“I was doubtful whether I was welcomed there or not,” Jongin admitted with a nonchalant shrug of his shoulders.

“You weren’t welcomed in my room the other day as well, but that didn’t stop you from being a thorn in my side.” Sehun expressed with an unattractive snort and turned his back towards the other, ready to walk away. However, before he could move the name that the other male uttered froze him in his steps.

“Bang Junhyuk.” Trepidation swelled inside him like boiling lava.

“Famously known as Hawk. Fifty-five years old. Moved from the Northern state of Nivia towards the South of Laurv; a hub for Wolf hunters. He had a daughter and a wife, but they were killed by the Wolves of the Nivian Pack when he was thirty. It made him hate our race and thus he took up the profession of a hunter.” Swallowing the lump that has risen up his throat, Sehun slowly faced Jongin again.

“A fair, but nonetheless a very vicious hunter. He’s known for working alone and for being merciless when it comes to his job. However, he only ever goes after those Wolves that cross some sort of a line and pose threat to his kind. A nice man if you ask me.” His companion continued smugly and pocketed his hands.

“Interestingly enough over the course of the years, despite being the best, he started to lay low. There were even speculations that he had given up on being a hunter completely around…five years ago, but then suddenly he was announced as the new member of the most well-known team of hunters. It was surprising. Not only was he alone anymore, but he affiliated himself with people that adored blood-shed of the Wolves even if they were innocent.” Sehun averted his gaze away from Jongin, feeling nervous beyond belief when he took a step closer in his direction.

“I wonder what suddenly changed his mind. What brought him in _your_ way?” The other male muttered lowly and seized him from head to toe; as if somehow that would reveal all the secrets of the world to him.

Sehun fisted his hands by his side.

“You have answers to all my questions, right Sehun?”

“Jongin, you don’t know what you are talking about.” He tried to warn, but that only made the Alpha laugh; a bit drily, but still.

“Enlighten me then.” Sehun looked at him with growing dread.

“You said that you won’t force me.” He reminded in a desperate attempt to divert the other.

“I am not forcing you. I found this much, I can find the rest as well.” Jongin boasted, looking as confident as one person could.

_He already knows a lot more than Jaehyun._

_It won’t take him long to figure out my secret._

Drops of sweat started to slowly form on the back of his neck.

“You…you have no idea what you are doing? If your people continued to snoop around it can cost him his life! There is so much that would go wrong.”

“No one else knows about him other than me though.” The other male waved his concern off.

Sehun stared at him, dumbfounded.

“I gathered this information on my own. There was no one else involved so you don’t need to worry about that.”

“How did you even-”

“Hey, Sehun.” Junmyeon greeted the moment he spotted him.

“I hope you are in a better mood now.”

Sehun shot him an embarrassed smile while warily following Jongin’s figure as he walked away.

“Yeah, I am sorry about earlier.”

“It is okay, Sehunnie!” Baekhyun all but barged in and latched onto his arm. The smile on his face dimmed slightly when he, without any doubt, felt just how high his temperature was... _again._

“Your fever is quite high.” Thankfully, the other male kept his voice lowered.

“I am fine,” Sehun consoled before glancing around gingerly.

“Actually, I came down to talk to you.”

“Sure, what is it?” Baekhyun perked up with an encouraging smile.

“Look, don’t tell this to anyone. I want you to keep this a secret.” He began nervously and swiped a tongue over his bottom lip.

_This is it._

_I can’t back off anymore._

“Sehun, is everything alright?” His friend questioned with furrowed brows.

“Yeah, there is nothing to worry about.”

_I am just going to burst a bomb on your head tomorrow._

“It doesn’t sound like it.” Baekhyun pointed out with a ticked brow.

“What is this secret that I am supposed to keep?”

“Meet me in the woods with Minseok before seven in the morning tomorrow. I will show it to you.”

“You are scaring me.”

_Oh, Baek, you have no idea how scary it actually is, especially with Jongin on my tail._

“No need to be scared,” Sehun assured with a crooked smile.

“Don’t forget to tell Minseok, okay-”

“Sehun!” The said male faced his left in surprise upon being addressed in such an urgent manner all of a sudden.

“Minyoung…” He trailed off in uncertainty.

_Jaehyun must have told her._

It was the only plausible reason that could explain why she looked so close to tears.

“Is it true?”

“What is?” He inquired hesitantly; well aware of all the stares directed in their direction.

_For the sake of Selene!_

_Not now, please._

“Did…” She took in a shuddering breath.

“Did Dr. Lee really said that you need to be hospitalized?” The wave of shock that went through the whole launch made him feel anxious.

“Where did you hear that from?” He inquired tensely, knowing very well where she could have heard it, but he needed time – he needed to stall.

“Your Head Alpha, who else?” Minyoung responded strongly and firmly held onto his arm.

“I heard him talking to Dr. Lee.” Sehun cursed mentally. He knew that Jaehyun wouldn’t just go around spreading the news, especially when they were well aware of how Minyoung would actually react.

“Why didn’t you tell me before?” She demanded, the evident hurt in her eyes made him feel immensely guilty and shook him by the arm.

“I…there is nothing to make a big deal out of.” That didn’t seem to have appeased her at all, in fact, it only fed fuel to the already blazing fire of rage.

“Are you out of your mind?” Baekhyun spoke up before Minyoung could give him a piece of her mind.

“Did or did not Dr. Lee recommended you to get hospitalized?”

Sehun closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

_I was hoping for some more time._

“Sehun?” Minseok urged, sounding pretty anxious. He couldn’t really blame him.

“Not right away.” He conceded with a sigh and brought a hand up to brush back the stray locks from his forehead. He did not expect the whole matter to come out in this way and this soon.

_Today is not a good day._

“He said that I may have to stay at the hospital if my condition doesn’t get any better.”

“Your fever still isn’t gone?” It was Yixing this time. The fact that he looked so alarmed didn’t help him feel any better.

“Not quite.”

“But…didn’t Dr. Lee do something about it?” The other male looked justly confused.

“He ran some tests. We still haven’t gotten the results. Meanwhile, he did try to change my medicines and increased potency.” Sehun supplied with a wince.

“It didn’t work.” Yixing looked like he had something to say, something important even, but he wasn’t sure if it was the right time or not. Knowing that he was a doctor and that he must have realized how serious the situation truly was – which made him wonder just how much has Baekhyun figured out by that point since unlike Yixing he was aware of Sehun’s condition on Blue Moon – Sehun really hoped that the other male would spare everyone from the details.

“I-If you…” Chanyeol stammered with an utterly horrified countenance and walked closer to him.

“If you have been this sick all this time why didn’t you stay at home and rest? Do you know how worried I have been? You have gotten so weak and pale.” The elder male chided heatedly before glowering at him.

 _“What are you trying to do?”_ Honestly, Sehun has never heard his brother shout like that. He has never seen him so angry and speaking truthfully, it kind of annoyed him. They might have talked that night and it might have ended on a bit of a positive note, still, that didn’t give Chanyeol any right to scream at him. His brother had no right to demand answers from him as long as he didn’t give him the answers he wanted.

“ _Whatever_ ,” He began with a sneer and dauntingly took a step in Chanyeol’s direction. If the elder male thought that he could intimidate him by going all Alpha on him than he, for sure, has another thought coming.

“I am trying to do is none of _your_ god damn business. You have no right to demand anything from me. Remember that next time you try to act like my brother.” A sharp, surprised gasp that came from Minji – _fuck_ he has forgotten that she was there too – snapped Sehun out of his momentary fit of rage.

He knew that his words have hurt his brother – it was so freaking easy to read those wide, honest eyes – but all these years Chanyeol has hurt him too. Besides that, he was done being the center of attention. He was done giving answers. He was done justifying what he did and what he didn’t. He was sick of it. He was fucking tired. Everything in his life at that moment was taking a toll on him physically and psychologically.

“I am _fine._ ” Sehun asserted firmly, staring straight at Minyoung. He was at his wit’s end for the love of Selene.

“Why are you making such a big deal out of it? It’s not like this is happening to me for the first time. Other people might not know, but Minyoung you know it better than anyone else that I have always been _sick._ This is nothing new or extraordinary and just like last time, I will-” _End up on the hospital bed, fighting for my life…_

He caught his tongue in the nick of the time.

“I will be okay. Just like every time, it will pass.” At least, he hoped so because at the rate he was going, he might not even make it till Blue Moon. That was one of his worst nightmares, but Minyoung or as a matter of fact nobody else needed to know that. He was already regretting expressing his fears in front of Jaehyun. The cat wouldn’t have gotten out of the bag like this if he had kept his thoughts to himself earlier.

“You will tell me if it hurts, right?” Minyoung relented at last; she wasn’t convinced, that much he could tell and he was sure that she would pay him a visit later on so that they could talk properly without being disturbed.

“I will.” He agreed with a smile, which didn’t quite reach his eyes, and reached out to drape an arm over her shoulder.

“Now can we all get something to eat? I’m practically starving.” He didn’t really have an appetite, but the smile that she gave him as a response was totally worth it.

“Okay, everyone.” She chimed, breaking the tense atmosphere.

“Be at the dining table in fifteen minutes.”

* * *

The atmosphere at the dinner was stifled with dread. The little moment of lightheartedness that Minyoung’s smile had brought was long lost, leaving behind a rigid sort of silence behind itself. Literally, the occasional clank of the cutlery with the plates was the only sound that filled the sphere around them. Other than that, no one dared to speak a word; everyone seemingly lost in their own thoughts. _Heck!_ Baekhyun and Jongdae were silent as well which was something that has never happened before.

To make matters worse, Minji has been openly staring at him ever since they sat down to eat and he has been painfully aware of it. It wasn’t like she was trying to be discreet, to begin with. He could practically hear the gears of her mind turning as she most probably analyzed his’s and Chanyeol relationship anew after his outburst earlier.

Sehun really wanted to smack himself. She was the only person in the pack-house who wasn’t aware of the strained relationship he has with his brother and he had really hoped to keep it that way. She was pregnant for crying out loud. He didn’t want to be the cause of any sort of stress for her.

Moreover, Minji wasn’t the only one staring at him. Almost everyone kept an eye on him – it was as if they expected him to drop dead from some kind of illness any moment – though admittedly they were a lot more discreet about it than her. It was touching…in a very odd sense. He appreciated it, their concern for his well-being. He really did, but being under constant scrutiny was putting him on the edge as well which was why it didn’t come to him as a surprise when he accidentally choked on his next bite.

Five glasses of water were immediately thrust towards him from different directions; surprisingly one of them belonged to Jongin. Sehun stared at them owlishly for a second before hesitantly taking the one from Chanyeol’s hand. He hoped that it would make his brother feel a bit better after how he had hurt him just a few minutes ago.

“I didn’t chew properly before swallowing. That’s all.” He explained to no one in particular and watched on in amusement as everyone slowly pulled their hands back with slightly coloring faces. At their obvious embarrassment, a soft laugh bubbled past his lips which was soon joined by Baekhyun’s more boisterous one.

“Can you guys be any more obvious?” Jongdae questioned with a groan before cackling at their predicament as well.

“Shut it, Jongdae.” Kyungsoo hissed with mortification visible on his face.

“Sorry, Sehun.” Junmyeon apologized with a sheepish grin.

“We should have a bit more faith in you.”

“It is okay,” Sehun assured with a subtle grin of his own.

“However, it would be nice not to be watched all the time while I am eating.”

“Noted.”

It was okay.

Everything was okay and if it wasn’t then it would be. He would make sure of it. He won’t let anything happened to himself. He would tell his friends. He would shift this time around. He would make it. He won’t fight with death this time around. He refused to spit out blood again. He refused to go through that agony once more.

_Everything will be fine._

* * *

Hey!

I hope you enjoyed the chapter. Tell me what you think about it in the comments. Really, it motivates me greatly and I seriously need some motivation right now LOL

Kudos are greatly appreciated ^^

Thanks a lot for reading.

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Twitter: [@exosangel7](https://twitter.com/exosangel7)

Curious Cat: [exosangel7](https://curiouscat.me/exosangel7) if you have any question regarding the fic ^^


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> //Trigger Warning//
> 
> A part of Sehun's past is going to be revealed in this chapter and it has heavy themes such as almost rape and inappropriate language.  
> Please, don't read if you think that it will make you uncomfortable.  
> You can just ask me and I will briefly sum it up for you.  
> Also, Sehun sort of have a mini anxiety attack as well so read carefully.

“Sehun,” He could hear Baekhyun’s distinct voice laced with confusion and uncertainty.

He didn’t really blame his friends for being apprehensive.

His wish to meet them in the secluded corner of the woods was weird enough – the timing as well wasn’t that normal too – but on top of that he had also asked them to release huge bouts of their pheromones. It was a strange request to make, he knew that, but he also had to make sure that no one would be able to single out his scent if anyone happened to chance upon that area in the duration of the next hour.

“What are you doing behind the tree?” Baekhyun spoke up again though he didn’t move from his place next to Minseok because they have been specifically instructed by their friend to stay right where they were.

Closing his eyes, Sehun tried to calm down his frazzled nerves and slowly pulled the shirt he was wearing over his head.

“Sehun,” Minseok called out in a slightly startled tone. The other male must be wondering why he was taking his clothes off in the middle of nowhere.

“Just...a moment more and you will understand.” Sehun was almost begging by that point. He didn’t know what to expect and what not to. He didn’t know if that would be the end of their friendship or maybe, just maybe the burden of the secret that he had carried for so long would be slightly taken off his shoulders. Heaving a shaky breath, he shucked off his pants and underwear as well – his fingers were literally trembling – before he finally let go of his hold on the beast prisoned inside him.

His Wolf practically preened in satisfaction.

“Please, don’t be scared.” He mumbled in a small, strained voice; not sure if what he said was directed at his friends or himself.

“Why are you saying that-?” Minseok broke off with a gasp as he heard the sudden cracking of the joints that resounded awfully loudly in the otherwise serene and quiet atmosphere.

“What is going on?” Baekhyun sounded downright hysterical which only made the whole thing worse. They can’t see him yet. He was hidden by the huge trunk of the tree, but he was sure that at least Minseok was perceptive enough to know what was happening.

“I-It can’t be.” He heard a hushed whisper before stifling silence prevailed upon them. It was broken, a moment later, only by the loud snap of his bones which made him cringe. Sehun squeezed his eyes shut at the familiar ache in his body as white hair started to slowly grow out of his pores and his bone structure began to modify itself. It took him longer than it usually did to shift – maybe because he wanted to delay it as much as possible sub-consciously; consciously even, really – but by the end of the minute he was done with the task all the same and was ready to face the consequences.

Letting out a snort, Sehun stretched his neck and gave himself a full body shake, almost as if he was trying to adjust into his animal form before he finally stepped out to reveal himself.

The stunned silence that greeted him wasn’t really that unexpected.

“Sehun…” Baekhyun choked out weakly.

“Is that you?” Sehun only walked closer to him as a response and nuzzled his nose against his leg.

“Oh, my- Selene! What is…you are…you can’t- Minseok! He is- he is…”

“The White Wolf.” Minseok breathed out in horror and fascination what Baekhyun couldn’t even bring himself to articulate.

* * *

_“Why are you making so much noise, kid?” The Beta who had stormed inside the cabin after hearing his howl demanded while looking around the room in annoyance._

_“Where is the freaking nurse?”_

_Shouldn’t you know that!_

_Sehun had wanted to scream, but he was frozen. He had been fucking petrified at that moment because not only was he completely naked, out of his senses, and experiencing his very first, potent heat, but white hair was also growing all over his body._

_He was in the middle of the painful process of shifting._

_“Well?” The other Wolf had prompted and turned to face him just in time Sehun had pulled the blankets over his head to hide himself completely. He hadn’t known for how long he could keep that up or for how long he could hide, but the only thought going through his head at that time was the fact that he couldn’t, at any cost, let that Beta see him._

_“Get out!” He had screamed, fear deeply rooted in his voice, as he had tried to shrink, to make himself look as small as he could so that somehow the other Wolf wouldn’t be able to make out that he was the White Wolf._

_“Listen, kid, you can…” The Beta had started in an agitated tone before he ominously trailed off._

_“Wait- is that white fur growing on your body?” Sehun had gone completely rigid in his place._

_“N-No! Go away, please! You are not supposed to be in here.”_

_“Holy, Selene! That is fucking white fur.” The other Wolf had stepped further inside the room completely ignoring what he had told him to do._

_Sehun tightened his hold on the blanket._

_The pain was making him go delirious. His heat wasn’t helping him at all as well and he had no idea how he was to deal with the situation at hand._

_“Please, leave me alone.” He had sobbed when the Beta had tried to yank the blanket away from him._

_“I beg you. Leave me alone! Go away.”_

_“You are kidding me, right?” The depraved villain had sounded utterly drunk as if he was in a haze before he forcefully ripped the blanket._

_At that very despicable moment, in those vile, lusty eyes, Sehun had seen his dreadful future for the first time. He had seen himself being reduced to nothing, but an object. He had seen pain for himself and nothing else. He had seen force, violence, rape of his body and soul, and blood-shed. He had seen what he was going to be in the eyes of the world. He had seen what was going to happen to his loved ones._

_“Now, be a good little boy and stay still.”_

_“No!” Sehun had cried out before lunging out of the bed – despite the way his whole being protested against moving even a single limb – with the shredded blanket clutched in his hand so that he could wrap it around himself._

_“Stay away from me. I am warning you.” The Beta had laughed at him sardonically._

_Sehun couldn’t ever get that terrifying sound out of his head._

_“What are you going to do? Call for help?” The monster had challenged before taking a step in his direction._

_“We are alone. There is no one. Even if someone heard your scream by the time they come here, it would be too late.”_

_“I-I won’t let you…I won’t l-let you touch me.” The ache in his bones had been unbearable by that point. Sehun hadn’t been able to stop it when his legs had buckled under him._

_“Oh, come on, Omega~” The disgusting man had cooed while greedily eyeing his body that he was trying so hard to cover._

_“You know you want it. That’s what you are made for anyway. You want me to tear you open, don’t you? You are leaking for it. Why are you playing so hard to get?” Those words had physically spurned him. Sehun had never felt his ears ringing the way they did upon hearing those words that censured his being and self-esteem._

_“You-” He had broken off with cough-turned-sob._

_“You are wrong. I don’t want you- disgusting! You are disgusting.” It hadn’t been hard to realize that his legs weren’t going to help him so Sehun had scrambled on the floor – in bone-chilling horror – to get as far away from that Beta as he could, but still, there was so much that he could have done. It didn’t take his molester more than three steps to bridge the gap between them._

_“Don’t do this.” He had begged. There was nothing else that he could have done. His Wolf still hadn’t come out. He had been alone, in pain and helpless. His vision had already been blurring and the agony from his bones cracking was making dizzy._

_“Please…” Fresh tears had leaked out of the corner of his eyes._

_“Have mercy. Don’t-.” Sehun had screamed for help as loudly as he could when the merciless beast had seized him from the wrist and pulled him up before throwing him on the bed._

_“No! Let me go! Stop.” He had cried himself hoarse as the Beta had mounted over him forcefully._

_“I won’t let you! I don’t want to. Get away from me.” The sharp sting on his left cheek had been nothing compared to the burning agony coursing through his system._

_“Stay still or I will choke you to death this instant.” He hadn’t stopped because he’d rather be choked to death than raped and mated against his will._

_“Stop moving – fucking, Bitch!” Sehun hadn’t known how or why it had happened, but suddenly he had grown claws; sharp and long. He had spent only a second wondering over them before he had brought them down on the monster who was trying to molest him._

_“You feisty little whore.” The Beta had cursed before pinning his wrists against the bed._

_Sehun had struggled against him with all the strength left in him._

_“You like to play with claws?” There was an unpleasant glint in his eyes. He looked almost deranged, as he eyed his bare body._

_“I haven’t noticed how pretty you were.” The other Wolf whispered right against his lips and brought a hand up to caress the side of Sehun’s face; who recoiled almost instantly as if the touch was acid against his skin – it was._

_“It is a sin not to use you. That pristine white neck was made to be marked.” Sehun hadn’t been able to stop himself when he spat in the Beta’s face. He had been so disgusted and the feeling of helplessness had caused him to act out._

_“I will fucking ruin you.” The reaction had been immediate._

_“I will fucking mate with you in my Wolf form. I will fucking ruin that hole of yours. I will ruin your tight, perfect little body for everyone out there.” He had shifted into his Wolf – an imposing and petrifying brown beast – right above him._

_Sehun had gone stiff as a cold hand of terror wrapped around his throat and choked him._

_“N-No…no- no! Don’t touch me! No- fuck!” Searing pain shot up his side as the Wolf’s claw tore through the skin on his side._

_A loud growl bounced off the walls of the cabin, the claw sank deeper into his skin – it was impossible to hold the scream that left his lips – before the Beta above him lowered his mouth towards his neck. Helpless, Sehun had closed his eyes and fought against the heavyweight as much as he could, but there had been no use._

_“Stop it…” He had weakly mumbled, having completely resigned to his fate, before suddenly the weight of the Wolf on top of him had been thrown off._

_“You fucking Wolves can’t ever keep it in your pants, can you?” The words had seemed oddly disjointed as if there was a distance of hundreds of miles between him and whoever it was who was speaking._

_Sehun hadn’t even been able to make out the face of his savior because the next few minutes had been a blur. The pain had intensified to maximum. His head was throbbing. His body was aching. His side was burning, but there was something else…something else inside him that was burning as well; something that was seething in rage. Sehun hadn’t been aware of what was happening around him. He had known that there was a fight happening. He had known that someone had saved him and from what he could make out in his state, the one helping him was a human, and from his expertise, he had deduced that it was a hunter._

_A fucking hunter._

_He had wanted to laugh, but all that came out was another howl of agony. His bone structure had modified entirely and it had taken him a moment too long to realize that he had finally shifted. His Wolf had finally come out and it was freaking thirsty for blood and revenge._

_Sehun had snapped the Beta’s neck in a matter of seconds._

_He had killed someone. He had lost his innocence and had become a murderer._

_Omegas were supposed to be nurturing, kind, and gentle. They were supposed to give life, not take it away, but Sehun…he had gone against his nature the very second he shifted._

_His hands were covered in blood._

“It was Hawk. He helped me that night. Jaehyun knows about him, but I managed to shift back in my human form just a minute before he came so he doesn’t know about my Wolf.” That’s it. He has done it. He has explained everything to them from the very start to the very end. He has told them about the torture he went through for more than two days before he shifted. He had told them about what happened on the night his Wolf finally came out, but before all that he had told them about the reason why he was revealing his secret – that he has kept so dearly – in the first place. He had divulged to them what Hawk had informed him of in the café a few days back.

He had told them that he needed to shift this year or he might die.

Now, he had nothing to hide. He has completely bared himself, told them all his secrets. He was completely vulnerable and to some extent at their mercy.

“Sehunnie~” Baekhyun whimpered and tightly held onto his hands while a single fat tear rolled down his cheeks.

“That monster deserved to get killed. Don’t blame yourself for it. You are not a murderer. You were just saving yourself.” Jaehyun had told that to him so many times and Sehun knew it was the truth, but still somehow hearing it from Baekhyun – an Omega, his brain provided – somehow made it more believable.

His friends didn’t see him as a monster.

They didn’t see him as a murderer.

It felt as if someone has lifted a heavy weight off his soul.

“Y-You…” Baekhyun continued with a frown. There was evident pain in his eyes. There was a flash of hurt and betrayal as well which Sehun had been expecting.

“Why didn’t you tell that to us before? Why have you been suffering alone? Are we not your friends? Don’t we share a bond? Is it for nothing? Why can’t you trust us?” They were currently seated on the protruding root of one of the ancient trees, shrouded in the shadows of the dense forestry, but still, the bitterness in Baekhyun’s expression didn’t go unnoticed.

“I couldn’t tell you. I really couldn’t. It was too dangerous. The fewer people knew about it, the better it was.” Sehun defended himself in a desperate manner before looking at Minseok who has stayed silent all this time.

“Minseok.” He beseeched with trembling lips.

“Please, don’t stay silent like that. You can get angry. You can scold me. You can call me names, but don’t-”

“What do you want me to say, Sehun?” Minseok demanded softly.

“I understand you. I sincerely do, but…” He trailed off with a sigh.

“It has been almost five years! For five years you have deceived everyone into thinking that you didn’t have a Wolf when all this time… _heck!_ I don’t even care you lied, but all this time you were committing a fucking suicide and we were right there by your side letting you do it! You should have told us; at least me and Baekhyun.”

“I-I couldn’t tell anyone.” Sehun reiterated his earlier statement.

“It was not fair to you guys. I couldn’t compromise your safety. Don’t you know what happened to all those White Wolves before me? What happened to their families? Their friends? Their mates? I would never forgo your safety, but now I don’t have any choice. Hawk threatened to tell everything to Jaehyun and I am scared.” The end of his sentence was barely audible.

“I know that you guys are hurt, but I really need your help. I won’t be able to do this alone, please.”

“Are you still not going to tell the Head Alpha?” Baekhyun inquired with a disapproving frown. Sehun strongly shook his head, panic clearly written all over his face.

“You guys can’t tell anyone else. Promise me. You won’t tell anyone about my Wolf.”

“But Sehun-”

“No! Trust me on this, Baekhyun. Please!” Sehun pleaded frantically.

“It’s not like I don’t have any confidence in Jaehyun, but it is for the safety of the people we love. It is for the safety of our pack. If by any chance someone found out about me even by mistake,” He shuddered at the very thought of it.

“They would rage war on us and it would be a never-ending process. Everyone will die! I will be nothing more than a hole to fuck and a tool used to gain power. People will forcefully mate with me. They will rape me and then others would come and they will kill whoever my mate is. They will kill my family. The whole process will repeat itself and I will be…again and again-” It was only when Minseok pulled him in a hug, looking fairly alarmed, did he realize the tears that were streaming down his face.

“Breathe, Sehun. You need to breathe. Stop talking for now and just breathe for me, okay?” Trembling, Sehun timidly nodded his head and tried to calm down the panic that was steadily rising inside him.

“You can’t tell anyone.” He sobbed into his friend’s chest; feeling utterly exhausted and broken.

“We all would be done for.”

“We won’t. I promise, okay?” Minseok consoled and patted his head gently.

“Just calm down and breathe.”

“Sehun,” Baekhyun began cautiously once he has gotten his breathing under control.

“I won’t tell anyone, but you need to consider it too. Won’t it be better if the guys know? They need to be prepared for something like this.” Jongin’s face immediately flashed in front of Sehun’s eyes.

“You don’t need to worry about that. Jongin knows there is a White Wolf in the pack. He accidentally saw me the last time I sneaked out though he doesn’t know that it is me.” There was a tense pause once again, each of them lost in their own thoughts, which was broken by Minseok.

“Jongin’s mate.” There was a lilt of realization to his tone; as if he has been suddenly hit with an epiphany.

“You are Jongin’s mate, aren’t you?” Sehun tensed up in his place the second he heard that.

“Are you out of your mind? That is not possible!” He denied strongly and broke away from the embrace. The sheer notion of it was making his head spin.

_No…_

_It can’t be._

It would complicate everything so much more.

_But the connection…_

_No!_

_What the hell am I thinking?_

_It can’t be the truth._

He won’t accept it. He won’t accept it at any cost.

_It is so easy to talk to him._

_He calms me down._

_My Wolf…_

_Shut up!_

Sehun stood up with an incredulous laugh, appearing almost frenzied, and swallowed the lump lodged in his throat when his uncoordinated senses caused him to stumble forward. Baekhyun steadied him instantly and wrapped an arm around his waist.

“Sehun-” There was obvious distress in his eyes.

“It can’t be.” He was trying to convince himself more than anyone else.

_I am lying to myself._

_The Silver Wolf’s mate has always been from the pack._

_I am the only one whose Wolf wasn’t checked for the mark._

“I can’t be. I am not Jongin’s mate. We hate each other’s guts for Selene’s sake!”

_I feel attracted to him._

_I have never felt attracted to anyone, but he flusters me._

_He makes my heart flutter._

_I feel jealous-_

“I am not!” Sehun was having trouble breathing which made him miserable enough, but along with that discomfort was the unexplainable pain too.

_I have a mate, but I can’t be with him._

_They will kill him._

_No…_

_I don’t have a mate._

_This is bullshit._

“Minseok, it is not true.”

“Okay,” Minseok conceded, looking positively shaken.

“Sehun, we get it. It is not possible.” He didn’t mean it. Sehun could clearly see it on their faces. His friends knew that he was pathetically trying to deny reality.

“They will kill him.” He sniffled before looking at Baekhyun. The shorter male has been trying to calm him down all this time.

“I can’t. _Baekhyun_ ,” Sehun wheezed out his friend’s name with difficulty; his body completely shutting down on him.

“They will kill him. This is what always happens. They will end his life to break our bond and then they will take me away from you guys. They will force-”

“Shh!” Baekhyun cut in with a grieved countenance. In a corner of his mind, Sehun noticed that he has never seen his friends so panicked and blue before.

It made him feel guilty.

“You said so yourself, right? It is not possible. There is nothing to worry about. Please, breathe properly, Sehunnie! You are scaring us. Stop thinking about it.” Minseok came forward to slowly guide him towards the protruding root again and coaxed him into sitting down.

“It is not true, right?” His friend looked torn between agreeing with the lie that he was trying to delude himself with or telling him the cold, harsh truth.

“No offense to you, but for your own sake Sehun, let’s hope it isn’t, hmm?”

* * *

It was.

It was true.

It was him all along and nobody knew; not even him.

Sehun, truthfully, had no idea what he was supposed to feel anymore. He had felt overwhelmed in the morning. The sheer possibility alone had caused him to have a mini nervous breakdown. Still, after Minseok had cautiously requested him to shift again so that he could check the back of his Wolf’s neck for the mark, he had felt abnormally calm. It was almost as if everything was alright. He had shifted without another thought and he hadn’t panicked when Baekhyun had confirmed that he indeed had the mark.

 _Jongin’s_ mark.

It was no surprise that Sehun had missed it. The mark was only visible on the neck of his Wolf which meant that he needed to shift for it to be visible. It was no secret that Sehun didn’t indulge the animal inside him a lot and when he did, it was mostly in the dark shadows of the night so, really, there was no seeing the mark himself. Moreover, there was no possible way for him to see the back of his own neck.

_This complicates things so much._

Just a few hours ago, his biggest worry was to devise a way so that he could shift on the night of the Blue Moon. He didn’t want to simply drop dead without any proper cause or reason. He wanted his death to have some meaning, at least. He did not wish for it to be suicide. Plus, he was too young and pretty to die and the idea of the death alone kind of sucked.

Sehun was not ready to die, but he was also not ready to have a destined mate. He wasn’t ready to have a mate period. Heck! He has never even thought about it – after getting the scar on his side he had honestly never even thought about having sex either – because with who he was it seemed impossible. Apparently, though, fucking with him was Selene’s favorite time pass because now he had a freaking mate; a pretty hot one with a handsome face, a stupidly addicting scent, strong and drool-worthy body and not to forget callous, veiny hands that could do a lot of things that he didn’t even want to think about.

_Okay, now my Wolf is just being depraved._

Anyway, moving on, because his life wasn’t miserable enough, after knowing that Sehun was the future Head Alpha’s destined mate his friends have drastically changed their perceptive and opinions even when they have been careful about it. Suddenly, it was impossible for them to keep his identity a secret, and truth be told, Sehun wasn’t so sure about it anymore himself. Him being Jongin’s mate changed a lot of things. Hiding the identity of the White Wolf was a concern, but now it was pushed to the back of his head in favor of the new worries that forced their way inside his brain.

Jongin was the Head Alpha. He was the Silver Wolf. The Silver Wolf can only ever mate with its destined one. Sehun was his destined one, but he needed to hide his identity. Jongin cannot know about him at any cost. It was all good till then, but that meant the Silver Wolf of their generation wouldn’t find its mate which consequently meant that the bloodline of Selene would eventually come to an end. There would be no more Silver Wolves.

Sehun was going half-mad. His mind was whirring. He felt like there was no ground under his feet anymore, no sky above his head, but his stupid Wolf was fucking horny as if Sehun realizing that Jongin was his mate automatically gave it a pass at being a slut.

_You aren’t getting any._

Despite everything else, there was a certain sense of belongingness that he hasn’t felt in a long, long time. A sense that he has craved for, but has never gotten because Chanyeol was too busy punishing him.

It made him happy.

In spite of everything else, he was happy too. He has a mate. That was something to be happy about, right?

He didn’t know.

He couldn’t tell anymore because he couldn’t decipher the true gravity of the situation at that moment. He felt numb. Oddly detached from everything around him. It was to the point that Dr. Lee cut his shift short and sent him home because seemingly he didn’t think Sehun was in any shape to be near patients that day. Maybe he truly wasn’t, but that wasn’t because he was unwell. Oh, no. It was quite the opposite actually. It was for the first time in a long time he wasn’t feeling sick. His fever was gone and his stubborn Wolf for once seemed like it was at peace. He felt sleepy and exhausted, but in a good way. He needed his bed. He needed to sleep because he hadn’t in Selene knows how many days and now, at last, he could do it. He could sleep. He could rest.

“Whoa~ careful.” Sehun forced his tired eyes to blink open when someone held onto his arm and steadied him.

Where was he again?

Oh- yeah, he was inside the packhouse. Baekhyun just dropped him off. He needed to go to his room now and sleep.

_Sweet, sweet sleep._

“Sehun.” Right, he has to deal with someone before that.

_Focus!_

“Jongin?” His words were slurred, but after a moment of dumbly staring at the other he did manage to pull himself away – he would not let his Wolf indulge in any sort of a physical contact lest it persistently started showing its true colors which would be tragically embarrassing especially in front of Jongin – and stand straight on his feet.

“Are you alright?”

“I am fine. Just sleepy.” The other male was eyeing him closely in distrust as if he expected Sehun to face plant any moment now which he vehemently thought was rude because he was sleepy, but _not that sleepy_ and he could totally manage to walk on his own–

“I told you to be careful.” Jongin chided the second Sehun stumbled on his feet again and proceeded to wrap an arm around his waist to pull him into his chest.

Okay, he took it back.

He was in no shape to walk on his own.

“I…am…fine.”

“It took you forever to complete that sentence. Don’t tell me you are fine.” Jongin contradicted strongly before tightening the arm that he has wrapped around his waist.

“We should take you to the hospital.”

“I c-came from the hospital.” Sehun drawled out before completely slumping against the warm, sturdy body he was pressed to as if he no longer had any control of his own.

_This feels so nice._

He felt so at peace with Jongin there. It was only making him sleepier.

“Sehun…?” The guy in question couldn’t really help it when he nuzzled his face in the crook of Jongin’s neck and slowly rubbed his nose up and down.

The arm around waist tightened further, almost to an extent that it became slightly painful, but he didn’t exactly mind.

_So he isn’t going to push me away._

Somehow that thought made his sleep-addled brain bolder.

“You know,” By that point, his speech was total gibberish.

“I _like_ …your scent. It is- it is very nice. I like it. I like it a lot.”

“Are you drunk?”

“Yes! I don’t drink. I hate drinking. I can’t drink, but I made Baekhyun buy me alcohol on our way here so now I am drunk which is why you should forget what I just said. I am just really sleepy and in normal circumstances...I would have flushed myself down the toilet before complimenting you. You get it, right?”

“Right.” Jongin looked like he was conflicted whether he wanted to whack him on the back of his head or not. It was actually funny how uncomfortable he truly looked.

“I am getting late for a meeting so let me just help you to your room, okay?” It was only then did Sehun notice the sleek black suit Jongin was wearing.

_He looks extremely delectable in it._

_Bad thoughts._

_That cologne smells nice though._

_I want to mess up those styled locks-_

_Okay! Horny Omega._

_Stop it._

“You don’t need to do it. I will be okay.”

“I am not asking you. Come on-”

“Sehun!” Minyoung’s excited voice which came from the Kitchen managed to have sobered up his drunk, useless brain because Sehun immediately wrenched his body away from Jongin’s. He did falter on his feet a bit, but thankfully in the end managed to keep his balance.

“What are you two doing standing there?” The elder female inquired the moment she stepped inside the launch.

“Nothing. I bumped into Jongin accidentally.”

“Ah,” She nodded her head before smiling brightly.

“You came home early today.” Sehun’s head was spinning. His vision was spinning, but he would be damned if Minyoung found out about him drinking; especially when he has been so sick. Plus, she knows that he never drinks which would automatically lead her to think that something was wrong with him and he was just not in the mood to deal with that while he can’t even think straight.

“My shift was short today.”

“That is great! I made fish cakes for snacks. Do you want to eat some?”

“Maybe later. I want to sleep now.” For a second, it looked like Minyoung would argue, but thankfully she decided not to and quietly walked back inside the Kitchen after a nod.

“I will go to my room then.” He told Jongin absent-mindedly and took a step forward, but with how hard his head was whirling he only ended up losing his balance. Thankfully, the other male was quick enough to catch him.

“Stay still,” Jongin demanded curtly before sighing. Sehun was about to open his mouth again – most probably to say something dumb – when he felt an arm wrapping around his shoulder and another going under his knees.

“What are you doing?” He inquired with wide eyes just in time Jongin swept him off his feet.

“Jongin! Put me down. I can walk on my own.” Sehun hissed and closed his eyes in mortification when the heat started to climb up to his face. He was drunk, but he wasn’t that drunk. Nope! He was not drunk enough to be okay with what was happening.

“You have gone insane.”

“No, I haven’t. Now can you shut up and stop moving? I don’t want to drop you.” No, he did not want to think about the fact that the Alpha carried him like he weighed nothing.

“I can walk on my own.” He complained instead though he didn’t stop himself when his head slightly dropped against Jongin’s shoulder.

_Oh, I can sleep right now._

_I don’t even have to walk._

That thought pulled out a yawn from him before his body completely relaxed in Jongin’s hold. Sehun told himself that he would close his eyes just for a second – his mate was carrying him and he wanted to cherish that – but he felt way too comfortable. He was at peace. He had no fever. He had no pain. As embarrassing as it was, it was hard not to fall asleep.

* * *

Hey!

I hope you guys enjoyed the chapter ^^

Let me know what you think about it in the comments, please. I know I am behind and I haven’t replied to a lot of comments, but it’s been a bit busy. I will get to them as soon as I can. Just know that I read them and I love them <333

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	12. Chapter 12

“Come here for a minute.” Sehun, who was making his way towards the stairs (looking extremely grumpy and miserable) to go down for dinner, whirled around in his place jerkily – surprise rather evident on his face – when he heard the sudden request; _order_ was a more appropriate word, but his head ached too much at that moment for him to pour his mind over the matter.

_What is he doing here?_

“Excuse me?” He was confused which in his opinion was entirely reasonable. Like it has been discussed before, the second floor was mostly reserved for Omegas and the guys never really stepped foot inside it; at least not alone. If they ever did visit the second floor, it was mostly with Minyoung. Well, there was this one time where Jongin entered his room, while he was clad just in a bathrobe, without any permission, but Sehun didn’t like to think about it a lot.

_I shouldn’t be this surprised._

_After all, he always does as he please._

“Let’s have a word.” Jongin amended his words listlessly and made a vague gesture in the direction of the couch that was placed adjacent to the one he was already occupying; most probably the other male wanted him to take a seat.

“A word about what?” Sehun implored cautiously and walked closer to the sitting area in a reluctant manner. It kind of irked him that Jongin didn’t even bother to raise his eyes from the black folder in his hands, almost as if there was no possibility of his orders being disobeyed.

“Sit down, first.” His addresser asserted blankly and finally tilted his head up to look at him. Sehun’s brows shot up in surprise when he noticed the specs that Jongin was wearing. The glasses looked nice on him, more than nice actually – he looked attractive, but you didn’t hear that from him – but they were also utterly useless. They were Wolves for Selene’s sake and their vision was better than any eyeglass could ever help them with.

“They help me with the concentration.”

“Huh?”

“The glasses,” Jongin clarified, looking bored out of his mind.

“You looked like you wanted to know why I was wearing them.”

“Concentration,” Sehun repeated with an amused snort.

“I have never heard of such a thing before.”

“You have now.” Jongin waved off with a shrug.

“Anyway, I brought you some fresh lime and meds. They will help you with the headache.” Sehun opened his mouth to ask ‘how did you know I was having a headache?’ but, in the end, decided against it. He was pretty drunk when they have met earlier so it wasn’t rocket science to figure out that there would be some repercussions.

“Thanks.” He expressed his gratitude instead and sat down. Thinking about earlier, he couldn’t quite help the flush that covered his skin upon remembering what went down between them before he passed out like a freaking moron in Jongin’s arms.

_I can’t believe I embarrassed myself like that in front of him._

The humiliating memory of what he had said and what he had done and just how uncomfortable the Alpha had looked made him want to bury himself in the darkest pits of the Earth so that no one would be able to find him there. Literally, Jongin was the last person he wanted to see at that moment, but as his wretched luck would have it he was sitting right in front of him.

“Well…” His companion prompted when he made no move to take the meds.

“I promise they are not poisoned.”

“It is not that!” Sehun protested strongly, feeling flustered beyond belief for some reason, and to prove his point he instantly popped the pill in his mouth before taking a huge gulp of the fresh lime and swallowing it. It was only after he had slammed the glass on the table between them – with a lot more force than necessary – did he realize that his reaction was way over the top and he was currently just making a fool out of himself.

If Jongin noticed his flaming complexion, he didn’t make any sort of a comment on it which Sehun was extremely thankful for. What he wasn’t thankful for, was the amused smirk that was directed his way.

_Get a grip, Oh Sehun!_

“I-I was just…” It was so damn annoying. So what if they were mates. It didn’t matter. It changed nothing. He wasn’t even going to accept their bond. Why the hell was he so nervous then? Why was he acting like such an idiot?

“I didn’t tell anyone.” Jongin spoke up when Sehun failed to convey whatever he was trying to say.

“What?”

“No one, but me…or Baekhyun, knows that you were drunk.”

“Oh.” That wasn’t even on his mind, but it was still nice to know.

“I know, I don’t need to say this. You are an adult. You know what’s best for you and I am sure you know how to take care of yourself,” Jongin continued before closing the folder he was previously going through and staring at him straight in the eyes. For some reason, the glasses were making him look even more intimidating than usual and _that_ was saying something.

“I bet you know better than anyone else what is good for your health and what is not. So, next time, be careful with the alcohol. Even if your temperature is finally gone, it is better if you be a little mindful.”

“I don’t usually drink.” Sehun defended himself with a wince, feeling as if he was a child being scolded which normally would have irritated him to no end, but right then it only made him feel embarrassed.

“I have nothing against you drinking,” Jongin cleared up before standing up in his place and dusting his clothes.

From what he could remember, the other male was still dressed in the attire that he has seen him adorning earlier that evening; though he appeared a lot more laid back and relaxed now. Maybe it was the way his gelled hair was messy now or maybe it was the fact that he has discarded off his coat somewhere before coming to talk to him. It could also be the rolled-up sleeves or the first two buttons of his shirt that were left undone.

Sehun wasn’t sure what it is was, but his whole demeanor seemed changed.

“There is no problem as long as it doesn’t affect your health.” For a moment there, he wanted to question Jongin regarding the reason behind the concern he was showing, but something made him hold his tongue before he could actually do so.

“I will be careful.”

“That will be better for all of us.” The Alpha noted apathetically before slightly tipping his head.

“See you at dinner then.”

“Yeah.” Sehun’s reply was almost inaudible as he aimlessly stared at the glass that he has earlier slammed on the table.

“Actually,” He whipped his head up when Jongin faced him again.

“There is something I wanted to tell you.” Sehun forehead wrinkled in confusion.

“Sure, what is it?”

“I found him.”

_Hawk?_

“Found who…?” He did not like that sharp glint in Jongin’s eyes. He couldn’t decipher it clearly, but something about it raised his hackles and screamed danger.

“The person I have been searching for.”

_The White Wolf?_

“R-Really?” Sehun tried his best to keep his reaction neutral, but it was hard with the way his body was slowly knotting up in apprehension.

The manner in which Jongin scrutinized him with shrewd, knowing eyes made the matters worse.

“Why are you telling me that?” It couldn’t be. There was no way he could know that Sehun was the White Wolf.

_He is mistaken._

_That is right._

_He got the wrong person._

Something at the back of his mind opposed that line of thought, but he ignored it as best as he could.

_His reaction towards me wouldn’t have been this normal if he knew that it was me._

Exactly. If Jongin ever found out that Sehun was the White Wolf, he was sure that the reaction would be much stronger. He wouldn’t treat him like he treated any other person. Besides that, Jongin was the type of guy who would confront him openly…at least he hoped.

“I just thought that you should know about it.” The other male responded elusively before pointing towards the medicine that he had brought for him.

“Hide that somewhere in your room if you don’t want my mother on your case.” He advised with a crooked smile before casually walking away.

_He doesn’t know it’s me, right?_

There was no way for him to get an answer unless he asked Jongin himself and that was not going to happen in that lifetime of his’.

* * *

Life was a funny, unpredictable thing.

It was nice, but it was also miserable. It was happy one second and sad the other. On good days it was a festive and on bad ones it was a freaking nightmare. It was a day, but it was also night. It was fast – everything passed by in a blur – but sometimes it also dragged on. Of course, there were some in-betweens too, but when it came to Sehun it mostly consisted of extreme shades of white and black rather than grey.

He wished that there were some grey areas in his life as well because the rapid alternation between good and bad, sad and happy was giving him whiplash.

“It might sting a little,” Yixing warned with a sympathetic smile, effectively breaking Sehun out of his sudden philosophical thoughts about the sick joke that was his life.

It really was a cruel gag.

He was convinced of that fact, especially after Yixing informed him last night, at the dinner _in front of everyone_ , that Dr. Lee has handed over his case (with _all_ the details) to him because apparently, it was better that way and really it was _better_. Sehun’s condition – the one other people knew of i.e. the rejection from his Wolf – wasn’t something that has never happened before, but it was still a very rare case that made medical nerds very curious and subsequently inhumane. His first experience at the hospital had been a freak show – Sehun was still a bit traumatized – and after that Jaehyun has refused to get him treated in any sort of public space. Since then, no matter how bad his condition got, he has always been treated at home with all the top facilities that would have been given to him in the hospital.

Sehun wasn’t complaining about it.

He was thankful, even.

So, yeah, he got where Dr. Lee was coming from, but still, for the longest of the minute, he had refused to believe what he had heard. However, when he had seen the grim smile on Yixing’s face he had known it immediately that the other male had already gone through his medical files. He knew that Sehun had a scar on his waist – which meant that he consequently knew when Sehun got it because medical files have _big, clear_ dates mentioned on them – and he knew about his near-death experience at the last Blue Moon.

He was bloody thankful that Yixing hadn’t mentioned that to anyone else till then and he was more than grateful towards the other male when, unlike any other person, he didn’t come to Sehun seeking answers that he wasn’t ready to give.

_When did my life become so messed up?_

He has too many secrets; too much to hide.

It was tiring and exhausting.

“It is okay. I am used to it.” His response didn’t seem to have pleased the people around him if he was to judge by the frowns that graced their features suddenly.

Sehun shrugged his shoulders slightly when he caught Minseok’s disapproving gaze.

It wasn’t like he was lying. He was just stating mere facts. Besides that, Yixing was simply doing a check-up on his condition so there was no need to worry. There wasn’t anything wrong with him for the first time in forever. He had a suspicion that his Wolf was being strangely compliant because of the great epiphany that he made yesterday, but didn’t spend too much time thinking about it since doing so gave him a headache.

Thinking of yesterday, Sehun’s eyes shifted towards Baekhyun.

He knew that his friends weren’t happy with him. He understood them too, but he really hoped that they would stop looking at him like he was the biggest disappointment in the world.

Okay.

Maybe he was exaggerating because they mostly looked at him in concern, but his point still remained. He desperately needed them to see things from his perspective and he knew that _they_ desperately wanted _him_ to see the things from their perspective and really, none of them was wrong. They were right in their own places which is why last night he has suggested a compromise.

He would tell the truth to Jaehyun and the others, but only after the Blue Moon has passed.

Now, what details that truth encompassed was a whole other issue. Baekhyun and Minseok wanted him to reveal his identity as a White Wolf along with the fact that he was the Silver Wolf’s mate. Sehun, on the other hand, barely agreed to let others know that he was supposed to be the destined mate that everyone has been searching for all this time.

That alone was a huge step for him.

They didn’t get him. They didn’t get the fact that Sehun has gone through hell and more for the past five years just so he could hide the fact that he was the White Wolf. It was not easy for him to let go. It was not that simple.

_“You have to tell them, Sehun. What are you going to tell the elders? How exactly do you know Jongin is your mate if not for the mark on your neck?”_

The connection.

He had wanted to reply, but he had kept that thought to himself because he knew what Minseok said was more than accurate. The elder Wolves won’t just take his word for it and he doubted that they would believe in something as subjective as a connection that he couldn’t even begin to talk about. He had no proper words to do so.

Despite having no idea how he had assured his friends that he would come up with something. He wasn’t very confident about it, but it was not like he particularly cared about whether the elders believed him or not. He kind of hoped that they wouldn’t since he has only agreed to admit to his bond with Jongin out of pure desperation. It was the only way to keep his friends silent. Just because he has consented to reveal that he was the Silver Wolf’s mate didn’t mean that he consented to accept the bond as well. There was no way in hell was he going to mate with Jongin or with anyone else as a matter of fact. Even the thought of it made him feel funny. Never in his life had he thought about mating with someone. The idea of it alone seemed absurd.

He didn’t need a mate.

He was perfectly happy without one.

Or so he tried to tell himself, but it did genuinely fluster him beyond the realm of rationality whenever he entertained the possibility of him and Jongin mating; possibility of him baring himself in front of someone, body, and soul. He absolutely loathed the way his heart rate picked up in nervous anticipation and he didn’t even want to think about the tingles that made him want to curl his toes because the feeling was just so overwhelming and unbearable.

Nope.

It was not going to happen.

He wouldn’t allow it to.

“Can you please hold the thermometer between your-” Yixing was cut short in the middle of his request when Kyungsoo came bounding down the stairs with a ringing phone in his hand.

“Sehun, your phone was ringing in the launch upstairs. It is a call from someone named Hawk.” Sehun stiffened in his place instantly while exchanging a panicked glance with Baekhyun.

“Hawk? That is a weird name,” Jongdae commented with a wrinkled nose though he wasn’t someone Sehun was concerned about at the moment. No. He was more interested in eyeing Jongin who in turn was eyeing the phone that Kyungsoo was holding in utter interest.

_Can things go any worse?_

“He is our friend from University. Don’t mind his name. He is weird like that.” Baekhyun excused with a nervous smile and snatched the phone from Kyungsoo’s hand.

“I will attend the call. Might be something important.”

_Apparently, they just did._

Sehun had nothing against his friend attending the call. After all, he had earlier tried to contact Hawk (sadly, he hadn’t picked up then) because he had wanted him to talk to Baekhyun and Minseok. He had already informed the elder male about his friend’s wish to be in contact with him which meant that it wasn’t a problem either.

Normally, Sehun wouldn’t have given in to their whims so easily, but he knew that Baekhyun and Minseok were wary of the hunter and didn’t trust him completely. Moreover, they had to come up with an efficient way to ensure that he could shift on Blue Moon so there was no use denying their wishes.

It was practical to establish direct contact between them.

Originally, they had wanted to meet Hawk face-to-face, but the hunter was out of the town. Nonetheless, he has promised to meet them as soon as he was back; which would be somewhere between the next two to three days.

So, as it has been clarified before, he didn’t have anything against his friend talking to Hawk, but he was very much against the way Jongin’s calculating gaze followed Baekhyun’s figure as he walked away to get some privacy.

_Good Lord!_

Sehun had no idea what he was supposed to do.

He was positive that his friends – Jongin was smart enough to deduce that if Baekhyun had information then so did Minseok – were going to be Jongin’s new target. He knew that the Alpha would try to get information from either Baekhyun or Minseok later on and he was afraid that one of them might spill the beans under the pressure.

Jongin was already intimidating as hell, but if he put his mind to it, he could make people shake in their knees with his stare alone; even Sehun had trouble keeping up with it when he was seemingly not scared of the Alpha. There was also this fact that his friends weren’t that keen on keeping his secret in the first place.

He seriously wanted to just bang his head against the wall.

“I think you are doing great, Sehun,” Yixing announced all of a sudden and leaned back in his place with a satisfied smile.

“Your temperature is normal and so is your blood pressure. Your sugar level seems fine to me as well. I don’t think there is any risk of you getting hospitalized anymore.”

_You can never be sure of that._

Sehun gave his doctor a smile, regardless of the thoughts going through his head.

“That is such a relief.” Minji gushed from her place and patted the empty spot beside her – since all of them were at home, for once, they have decided to have a movie night to relax – excitedly while looking at her brother-in-law.

“I saved you a spot, Sehunnie! We can watch the movie together and talk all we want. I have been wanting to do that for so long, but you are always so busy.” Sehun couldn’t really help the smile that took over his lips upon hearing the slightly whiny tone in her voice.

Minji was cute, kind, and genuine; a bit like Chanyeol. He liked spending time with her because she made him feel welcomed and warm. There was just this aura around her – something maternal (she was his family too, after all) – that made him feel at peace whenever he spent time with her which regretfully wasn’t a lot. He especially liked it when she would let him feel her stomach whenever the pup kicked around in his presence. According to her, the little one seemed to really like him because he got active whenever Sehun was around. He wasn’t sure whether that was the truth or she was just being nice to him.

“Thanks a lot for your time, Yixing.” He got up from his place with a smile, fully conscious of Jongin’s eyes on himself, and started to slowly walk towards the launch where the rest of the guys were sitting.

_Don’t look at him._

_Don’t look at him or it will be a whole mess._

“Here you go,” Jongdae handed him an open can of cola and a bowl of popcorn. Sehun took the items from his hand with a grateful smile before finally entering the sitting area. It was a bit nerve-wracking because Jongin was occupying the seat on the very left corner which meant that Sehun has to walk directly past him to reach his own spot. He was so damn nervous with the way he could feel the heat of the Alpha’s eyes on himself and seriously he wanted to melt right there and right then – there was just something about Jongin’s gaze – so that he could somehow hide, but-

“Hey, be careful! There is a puddle.” Junmyeon’s sudden caution brought him out of his thoughts. Sehun avoided the puddle of coke (what the hell was it doing there?) in the nick of the time and twisted his body, but sadly while doing so the can in his hand tipped, and the liquid inside it poured out straight onto Jongin’s lap.

“Shit!” Jongin cursed under his breath and immediately stood up in his place.

“Baekhyun spilled some of his drink earlier…” Minseok informed with a sheepish smile while nervously looking at his brother who was trying to salvage his shirt and trousers as much as he could.

“I am so sorry!” Sehun apologized fervently, once he had gotten over his shock, and without a second’s thought plucked out some tissues from the box placed on the glass table. He walked closer to the Alpha and started dabbing his shirt clean much to everyone’s surprise.

“I didn’t mean to do this.” He continued fretfully while gradually moving downwards.

“Junmyeon just spoke up suddenly and then the can tipped and I couldn’t stop it. I am so sorry that it ruined your clothes-” Sehun broke off in the middle of his rant when Jongin suddenly grabbed his wrist to stop him from going any lower.

“What?” He inquired while looking up with wide, anxious eyes.

“It is okay.” If Sehun wasn’t so busy being panicked, he would have noticed that the other male looked fairly awkward.

“I will do it myself.”

“No, I will clean it up for you. It was my fault.” He insisted and shucked off Jongin’s fingers who for some reason cast a wary glance behind him.

“Leave it, Sehunnie.” The male in question jumped a little in his place when he suddenly heard his brother’s voice from right behind himself. For some reason, he sounded pissed.

“He said he will do it himself.” What was Chanyeol glaring at Jongin for?

“I was just trying to help.” Sehun protested with a frown, not entirely getting his brother’s behavior.

“No need.” Jongin refused before clearing his throat and grabbing the tissues from his hands.

“I can take it from here.”

“But…” Sehun started to object though he trailed off when he finally realized _what_ was exactly wrong, or precisely just what part of Jongin he was about to touch.

“Oh!” He exclaimed intelligently before a furious blush bloomed across his cheeks.

_Was I really going to touch his crotch in front of so many people?_

Mortification ran its course through his body in strong waves when the situation finally dawned on him and it was only made worse when Jongdae started cackling out of nowhere. The evil twinkle in his eye told Sehun that he did not want to know whatever was going through his mind.

Jongdae’s outburst was followed by a round of suppressed chuckles and snorts from everyone present in the launch; well everyone except for Sehun (he was too busy being embarrassed), Jongin – he was, for some reason, trying to avoid Chanyeol’s eye – and Chanyeol, who was not looking amused at all.

_Selene!_

_Can this ground open up and swallow me?_

“Sehun can you- hey! Jongin what happened to you?” Baekhyun’s innocent question served as the final straw because the impending laughter that the others were trying so hard to hold back spilled over at last making Sehun groan.

“Why are you all laughing? Did I miss something?”

“Shut up, Baekhyun.” Jongin snapped at the clueless male before making his way towards the stairs; most probably he was going to change his clothes.

“What did I do?”

* * *

Unfortunately for Sehun, Baekhyun didn’t remain clueless for long which was an utter nightmare for him because unlike almost everyone else (except for Minseok) he knew that Jongin was Sehun’s mate. Add to that fact the little detail that Baekhyun was a total menace and an insufferable prick and you will get the disaster that Sehun was currently suffering through at that moment.

Throughout the movie, the size of Baekhyun’s smirk hadn’t reduced even a bit. There had been some sleazy gestures, coupled with the ridiculous wiggling of brows – Sehun had wanted to smack him right in the face – when Jongin had walked back in the launch to join them though thankfully it had been way too dark for anyone to notice. Of course, his friend had also taken the opportunity to make unnecessary comments which Sehun thought were best to be ignored because they made his face burn. To his absolute horror, instead of scolding Baekhyun – like he would have normally done – Minseok appeared quite amused by the little devil’s antics. Occasionally, Sehun heard snickering from his side as well, but he tried his best to keep his focus on the screen rather than his two betraying friends.

_“So…” Baekhyun had started with a wicked grin once the movie had ended and everyone had gotten busy tidying up the spots they have occupied._

_“I thought you didn’t want to accept the bond. I didn’t think it meant that you could still touch his d-”_

_“I swear to Selene, Baek! Don’t say something stupid or else I will kill you without any remorse.”_

_“We both know you love me too much to do that.”_

_“Minseok!”_

_“He is not wrong, you know.” Minseok had teased him instead of showing support._

_“How can you say that? It was an accident. Why are you guys looking so much into it?”_

_“Come on, Jongin is like the first Alpha whose crotch- ack!” Sehun had hurled the cushion in his hand at Baekhyun’s face._

_“Don’t spout nonsense! And for heaven’s sake keep your voice down.”_

_“Why are you so physically violent towards me?” Baekhyun had protested while hurling the cushion back at him._

_“Because you are a menace and don’t know when to shut your loud mouth up.”_

As much as Sehun had hoped for the teasing to end there, it didn’t. Though, to his credit Baekhyun did behave himself during the dinner; mainly because Sehun refused to pay any attention to him and had kept himself busy with Junmyeon who was telling him about one of the many camping trips he had gone on during his training period. It was afterward when all of them were gathered in the patio to chat among themselves leisurely when he started his ministrations again and much to Sehun’s horror it was Chanyeol who Baekhyun started instigating.

“Say, Chanyeol. Are you always going to be this possessive towards Sehun? What if he finds himself a mate?” Sehun had no idea what direction that conversation was going in and he dreaded the end result. He knew Baekhyun enough to know that he won’t be crossing any limits, not deliberately, but he also knew that his friend liked to tread on the edge.

“What are you trying to say?” Chanyeol implored with a scowl as if the very idea was unpleasant to his ears.

“Come on! You have a mate and she is pregnant. Sehun is like twenty-three.”

“Exactly!” Sehun turned towards his brother with a ticked brow when he seemingly agreed with Baekhyun.

“Sehun is _only_ twenty-three. He is too young and innocent.” Unsurprisingly, Chanyeol’s glare was pointedly directed in Jongin’s direction; who simply rolled his eyes.

_What the hell is going on between these two?_

“I am _not_ young and innocent.” Sehun denied while glaring at the elder male.

“You are a virgin!”

“What the hell Chanyeol?” He _did not_ just announce that out loud for the whole world.

_Who even told him that?_

Sehun immediately turned towards Jongin and narrowed his eyes when the latter only shrugged his shoulders as if what he did was the most normal thing in the world.

_Why were they discussing my virginity, in the first place?_

“Do not ‘what the hell’ me! I promised dad that I will keep all those Alphas away from you.” A scoff left Sehun’s lips before he faced his brother again. In the heat of the moment, he even forgot that Chanyeol should be the last person talking about their father.

“Dad never made you promise any such thing. Don’t be ridiculous.” What the hell was he even going on about?

“You were too small to even remember. How do you know?” Chanyeol challenged before crossing his arms.

Sehun’s left eye twitched in annoyance.

“Chanyeol, it is literally impossible. Dad didn’t even know I will mature as an Omega back then. How can he make you promise such a thing?” That apparently did the deed because the confident expression on his brother’s face slipped.

“Seriously, pull your head out of your ass the next time you decide to lie to me.” The snickers that resonated in the patio told Sehun that the other guys were immensely enjoying their pointless banter. He, on the other hand, was only procuring a headache.

“I am not lying. He…he had a feeling that you will. Paternal instincts or something like that.”

“Bullshit.”

“Yah! I am older than you, brat! Show some respect.”

“Stop lying to me then.” At that moment, he wanted to do nothing more than to just smack Chanyeol on the back of his head for being annoying.

“I am not.”

“You have always been like this.” Sehun gibed with a displeased huff.

“Over-protective to the point of extreme. Even when we were kids you used to scare away anyone who tried to approach me and then you always used to go back to your studies without playing with me.”

“I remember that.” Minseok supported Sehun with an airy chuckle.

“He tried to scare me and Baekhyun away too.”

“Not like it worked,” Chanyeol grumbled under his breath, looking extremely sour.

“You two were like pests. I can’t believe you guys managed to form a bond with him.”

“See!” Sehun asserted in an exasperated manner and faced his brother with something akin to disbelief on his face.

“Do you even hear yourself?”

“Damn, Chanyeol.” Kyungsoo chortled with a teasing grin. Like everyone else, he looked thoroughly entertained.

“You used to have a pretty bad case of a little brother complex.”

“I think he still does,” Minji added in helpfully.

“I do not have any complex.” Chanyeol refuted with a wrinkled forehead.

“They had ill intentions towards him. I swear!”

“They were kids of my age. Three to four-year-old kids can’t have ill intentions.” Sehun argued which only made his brother scoff.

“Do you know how adorable you were as a kid?” The word _adorable_ made him cringe and the confidence with which the elder male used it didn’t make him feel any better.

“The other kids used to compare you with the _Snow White_ because you were so white and your hair were so black. It irked me to no end when they tried to befriend you just because you were pretty. There was this one moron who told your father that he would mate with you when you grow up. Like hell, I would let that happen!” Laughter erupted from their audience at Chanyeol’s heated outburst while Sehun tried his best not to gape like a fool at his brother who appeared as if he still wanted to strangle the poor kid who made that innocent promise of mating with him.

“You used to be so small, delicate, and _pure_. I always had to keep an eye out.” Who the hell was this person that Chanyeol was describing?

“Plus, you didn’t use to complain!” The elder male continued sassily.

“As far as I remember, you used to love sitting in my lap while I studied, and don’t forget the plethora of questions that you used to throw at me. Lord, I used to wonder where the hell you got your curiosity from.”

“Well, I am sorry for being an intelligent kid with an active imagination. Sue me for that.” Sehun grumbled with an offended glower.

“Okay.” Baekhyun butted in before Chanyeol could counter back.

“Chanyeol, all I meant to say was that he will get a mate sooner or later – maybe a lot sooner then you expect.” Minseok nudged his friend on his side to make him shut up, but the damage was already done.

Chanyeol looked just about ready to strangle Baekhyun without any guilt.

“Wait- Sehun, do you like someone?” Jongdae turned to face him with eyes wide in excitement.

It was almost funny how fast his brother’s head snapped in his direction.

“What? No!” Sehun rebutted right away.

“I don’t like anyone and I am _not_ getting myself a mate sooner or later. I don’t even want a mate. Baekhyun is just being his usual _irritating_ self.” Just because Jongin turned out to be his destined mate didn’t mean he has to have any feelings for him and like he has decided before there was no way in hell that he was going to accept the bond. There would be too many things at risk if that happened.

“You shouldn’t be so confident about that,” Sehun whipped his head in Jongin’s direction when he heard that. The pace of his heart increased slightly in anxiousness as he tried to decipher the meaning of his words.

_Does he know something?_

“What if you end up liking someone eventually?” There it was again. The glint that he has seen in the Alpha’s eyes the previous day when he had told him that he had found the person he has been searching for.

“I don’t intend to like anyone.” Sehun chose his words carefully.

“I have a lot of other things to be worried about. Like I said before, my life is peaceful enough without a mate or any other sort of a relationship.”

“Oh, yeah,” Jongin challenged before sitting up straight in his place. There was a cunning smirk on his lips.

Sehun didn’t like it one bit.

“Would you say the same if it turns out that you have a destined mate?” Silence. Absolute, utter silence blanketed the atmosphere of the patio. Suddenly everyone has gone speechless. No one dared say a single word. _Heck!_ Sehun was sure no one was even breathing, but that could be just him because he _definitely_ wasn’t.

“Jongin, what the hell are you implying?” Jongdae demanded with an awkward laugh.

“I am not implying anything.” Jongin waved his brother off casually before slumping back in his place in an extremely indifferent fashion.

“I was simply wondering what he would do if he was in such a situation.”

“I-I would never be in such a situation. What nonsense?” Sehun hoped that his voice didn’t come out sounding as choked up as he felt.

“Why are you getting so defensive? It was a genuinely curious question.” Jongin goaded with his head slightly cocked to the side.

_He is doing this on purpose._

“You are acting as if I have revealed some big secret of yours.”

_He knows._

_He at least knows something._

“I am not being defensive. Gosh! You are giving me a headache. I am going to my room to sleep it off.” Sehun stood up from his seat and marched towards the stairs as quickly as he could.

“Have sweet dreams!” Growling under his breath, he turned around to shoot Jongin – he loathed that smug smile on his face – a final glare before finally getting the hell out of there.

There was no doubt.

Jongin, at the very least, has some kind of suspicion.

* * *

Hey!   
I hope you will enjoy this chapter a lot because I enjoyed writing it.

Well, the moment you all have been waiting for is slowly and gradually approaching.

What do you guys think is going on in Jongin's mind? Hint: he is definitely in on something ;)

Anyway! Comments and Kudos are greatly appreciated.

Thanks a lot for reading <333

Plus, you can follow me on

Twitter: [@exosangel7](https://twitter.com/exosangel7)

Curious Cat: [exosangel7](https://curiouscat.me/exosangel7) if you have any question regarding the fic ^^


	13. Chapter 13

Sehun didn’t mean to sound cynical or dramatic, but as far as he was concerned, Selene has never been the one to be generous with him. Ever since he was young, he has known that the goddess has some kind of a secret agenda against him. There wasn’t a single phase of his life where he wasn’t miserable – well, there wasn’t one except for his brief happy childhood, but even that was cut short – and he was smart enough to know that it wasn’t just some sad coincidence. It was something that was done deliberately or at least, his bitter consciousness lead him to think that way. After all, half his problems wouldn’t have existed if he had a normal Wolf instead of the White one.

So really, Selene has never been the one to take mercy on him. He wasn’t sure what it was that made him a target, but he has learned not to expect anything good from the goddess. Keeping that in mind, it wasn’t exactly wrong of him to be skeptical when things seemed to be taking a turn for good for once in his life.

It was strange.

Actually, it was more alarming than strange and gave him a sense of foreboding as if something huge was bound to go wrong sooner or later; as if it was the calm before a deadly storm. Now, it was possible that he was being paranoid, but a hunch deep inside him begged to differ.

He wasn’t simply being unreasonably afraid.

_What is it then?_

_What can go wrong?_

That was the problem.

He has no idea exactly what was it that could possibly turn his current happy, somewhat serene days into a nightmare again.

His health?

Yixing said that he has been doing pretty well for the past three days (ever since the fever had finally spared him) and normally, Sehun wouldn’t have dared to think that he was all in the pink – especially when the Blue Moon was so near – but he could _truly_ feel it in his bones. He wasn’t merely taking Yixing’s word for it, even though the other male has been doing a daily medical check-up on him.

It was his body.

It was his body that told him that he was actually enjoying good health for the first time ever since he shifted. There was no head or body ache that he was suffering from. There was no fever and no heady feeling of suffocation that made him want to claw his skin off. He wasn’t restless. In fact, he has been enjoying the most peaceful periods of sleep for the past three days. For the first time in forever, he was feeling good about himself.

What else could it be then?

His secrets?

Jongin appeared to be rather close to unraveling them all, but oddly enough that didn’t bring him as much anxiety as it should. At that point, honestly, Sehun didn’t know whether it would be a good thing or bad if all his secrets somehow came out in front of the others. He was too tired of hiding himself from the world; to the extent that there were now moments where he found himself entertaining the thoughts of consequences that would follow if he decided to divulge his secret to his family.

Would it be the right decision?

It couldn’t possibly be.

Was there ever going to be a stage in his life where he would regret doing so?

Knowing himself, he was certain that he would start regretting his actions the very next second. There was a reason why he went to such lengths to preserve his secret in the first place. There was a reason why Hawk told him to never share his secret unless it was absolutely necessary. Telling everyone about his identity would be, most probably, the dumbest thing he would ever do in his life, but then again it was _Hawk_ again who was asking him to tell his family about the whole White Wolf fiasco.

Truth be told, he was confused, but despite that confusion, he knew that it was not the thing that was making him apprehensive.

Was it then the matter of being Jongin’s mate?

He didn’t think so. If anything, the knowledge of being Jongin’s mate made his Wolf calm. As much as he didn’t want to admit it, as much as he wanted to deny it, things started to look up only after he has realized that he has a destined mate who was supposedly meant to be the perfect match for him and was supposed to stand by his side no matter what. He couldn’t really discern how it was precisely supposed to work, but somehow the notion of it never failed in making him feel giddy.

It was dangerous, Sehun knew he shouldn’t do it, but he couldn’t really help himself from wondering what kind of a mate Jongin would make.

_He’ll make a pretty great mate._

_He is attentive and loyal._

_Moreover, despite the fact that he acts like an asshole more often than not, he actually cares._

It was the conclusion that he reached every time before he dismissed the entire idea altogether. It was wrong. Well, not _wrong_ as per se, but it definitely wasn’t healthy for his _‘not-accepting-the-bond’_ memo. He shouldn’t be looking at Jongin in that light because if he did then he would want things that he knew he couldn’t have; at least, not while keeping his conscience intact.

He would never be able to stand it if the Selene pack lost it's Head Alpha – and consequently all its glory – because of him. He would never be able to stand the thought that he was the one who took away Minyoung’s and Jaehyun’s son from them. He would never be able to face Minseok after being the reason of his brother’s death. He would actually be Chanyeol’s sinner if he became the cause of his best friend’s death – the list went on. The bottom line was the fact that he couldn’t, in good conscience, accept the bond.

_Why do I always think that he is going to die?_

_He is more than strong to defend himself and the pack._

_The other guys as well._

_Hawk said that they are the strongest bunch in the history…_

Maybe the likelihood of his mate being killed – even though a major problem – wasn’t the only concern he had. Accepting the bond came with other implications as well. It wasn’t just procuring the status of the Head Alpha’s mate. It wasn’t just about keeping his Wolf calm and peaceful. It wasn’t just about the contentment he felt with his mate. It wasn’t just about the warm, tingly feeling that enveloped his soul whenever he was around Jongin and it definitely wasn’t only about the inscrutable connection or just how comfortable he felt talking to his mate.

It was much more than that.

Giving in to the bond also meant him and Jongin accepting each other in every way possible and Sehun wasn’t entirely sure if he was ready to do that. He wasn’t sure if he was ready to open up to anyone other than Baekhyun and Minseok. He didn’t feel comfortable with the thought of baring himself like that in front of anyone. All his life, he has kept secrets, and from what he has seen people _didn’t_ keep secrets from their mates.

Was he ready to let go of that trait of his?

He didn’t know.

Besides that, it didn’t only include the baring of his soul. Mating with Jongin literally required him to _bare_ himself in front of the other male, the indication of which alone made him burn in mortification. He has never given it much of a thought – not during his heat even – his whole life. He wasn’t kidding. There was a time, a good two or so years ago, where he wondered whether there was something wrong with him because he truthfully never felt sexually attracted to anyone. It was _another_ thing that now his Wolf has suddenly started to act up, but his point still stands!

It just wasn’t an appealing idea and thus, abstinence wasn’t a problem for him. Yeah, the scar on his side was a pretty big factor in why he was still a virgin, but if he thought about it enough…he might still have been a virgin, regardless of whether there was a scar or not.

Speaking of the scar, would he be willing to let Jongin – yeah, he might be his mate, but still, they were practically strangers to some extent – see it? Was there a chance that his mate would be put off from it and would refuse to accept him?

He doubted that.

Sehun may not know Jongin all too well, but he knew him enough to know that the Alpha wasn’t a shallow person.

_It would have been better if he was._

He didn’t mean it, but that didn’t change the fact that it was indeed a more favorable circumstance in his situation. Once everyone found out that he was the Silver Wolf’s mate they would want to conduct a mating ceremony as soon as possible and not to forget the elders of the pack who were already pretty antsy about Jongin not having an heir.

_Fuck._

Sehun didn’t even want to think about it. He has worked hard all these years to become a good doctor. If he ever agreed to accept the bond, there was no way in hell he was going to take up such a responsibility before he started his residency in the hospital at the very least. Otherwise, it was a big red flag for him.

Plus, in order to produce an heir it was kind of mandatory for them to have _sex_ which if he hadn’t already made it clear wasn’t something he was ready for. Call him a prude or whatever (maybe it was the aftereffect of what happened at his day of shifting), he simply wasn’t up for it. People might think he was pretty, but the truth that he was way too conscious about the scar on his side to ever be comfortable with the idea, stood proudly. He was _damaged_ , in more than one way, for life and nothing could feasibly change that.

On the side note, he was also _way_ too shy – though he might not physically look the part – when it came to things like these (things like being physical) so, yeah! It was pretty embarrassing how he lit up merely at the thought of holding hands so anything more than that was out of the question.

_Jongin must have sinned big time in the past life to get a messed up mate like me._

Self-deprecating, but again, it was the truth.

“Sehun.” Yixing’s gentle voice snapped the boy in question out of his troublesome thoughts.

“What brought you here?”

“Umm…” Sehun started intelligently before clearing his throat to buy himself some time.

Right.

He was standing at the entrance of Junmyeon’s and Yixing’s room because Kyungsoo asked him to run an errand.

“Kyungsoo asked me to see if you can help us prepare the dinner today.” There was also this part about seeking Jongin’s help if Yixing was busy because surprisingly enough the Alpha was decent enough in the Kitchen – better than the other guys – but Sehun decided that he would keep that chunk to himself.

“Oh, I am in the middle of something right now. Why don’t you come in and wait for a bit?” Yixing urged with a smile.

Nodding his head with a crooked smile – which, admittedly, appeared a lot distracted than he intended for it to be – Sehun pushed at the slightly ajar door to create more space for himself and moved it back to its original place once he was inside. It was only then when he had turned around in his place, with his lips parted in an attempt to speak, did he realize Jongin’s presence (which he has miraculously missed) in the room as well.

Sehun stopped dead in his tracks, his heart rate picking up in nervous anticipation, once he made an eye-contact with the very person he has been hoping to avoid for as long as he could. It wasn’t a very tedious task considering the fact that he went straight to bed after the weird – dangerously _provoking_ , actually – conversation they had. In the morning, he had an early shift which meant that he hadn’t seen the Alpha at the breakfast table like he usually would have. He wasn’t even expecting to see him now since Jongin usually returned home late from office, but Kyungsoo – who had earlier approached him while he was playing video games with Jongdae in his room – has unassumingly informed him of the other male’s return when he asked him to seek Jongin’s help if Yixing was busy.

The pace of Sehun’s heart only accelerated further when he slowly trailed his eyes down and finally realized the state of undress – well, he was wearing pants, but a very major article of his clothing, _his shirt_ , was glaringly missing – that Jongin was currently supporting. His greedy, _traitorous_ eyes drank in the spectacular visual of the hard, defined chest, tanned skin, broad shoulders, sharp collarbones, and a sculpted torso complemented by a narrow waist. It was ridiculous how attractive the other male looked with his skin pulled taut over the ripe muscles.

Sehun’s Wolf practically purred – yes, the stupid shit actually purred like a fucking cat – which caused him to tear his eyes away from Jongin in utter mortification.

_Oh! Go to hell._

He mentally cursed at his Omega.

_I am not accepting the freaking bond just because you are horny over a half-naked guy._

As if to mock him, the animal inside him purred again.

_Shut up!_

He almost projected his thoughts out loud in annoyance but bit his tongue at the last moment to keep himself from making a fool out of himself.

_What is Jongin doing here half-naked anyway?_

“Why don’t you sit down, Jongin?” Yixing’s sudden request broke Sehun out of his chain of thoughts.

“Let me have a closer look at the gash before I treat it.”

_Wait- what?_

_Gash?_

_What gash?_

Sehun felt his heart sinking the instant Jongin moved to sit down – it kind of made him uneasy that the other male didn’t even spare him a single glance – and subsequently revealed the long, angry, and red wound on his side.

_H-How did he get it?_

He knew it. He was right all along. The feeling of impending doom that he has been getting was not something to be overlooked. Things have already started to go southwards. Something was terribly wrong. It has started to show and from what he knew from his experience the situation wasn’t going to get any better from here. They were in for something; something very horrible. He just didn’t know what it was yet. The fact that scared him to his roots.

_Who did this to him?_

There was this strong urge inside him – an urge from deep within – that incited him to walk closer to his supposed mate and take care of his wound instead of Yixing or at least ask him what the hell went wrong, but Sehun stopped himself by biting down on his tongue hard. He could not possibly do those things without raising questions. Jongin already knew too much. He was not about to hand him an open opportunity to question him. What was he going to tell him anyway? Why the hell was he so damn concerned about his well-being? Why the hell was he feeling so damn distressed?

Sehun had answers for those queries, but sadly he couldn’t – in any possible way – let a certain Alpha ever know about them.

“It doesn’t look like the knife was made of silver.”

_Knife?_

_So it wasn’t a Wolf._

_It was a human._

“That guy didn’t look like a hunter to me so not that surprising,” Jongin replied blankly.

“It looks deep though.” Yixing further observed with a frown.

“Did you shift before coming here?”

“Yeah, I figured that it will heal the wound faster.” Jongin was right. Shifting into their Wolf form did fix their wounds better. Actually, Sehun’s kind hardly ever got any scars because their Wolves have a special gene – of course, their genetic make-up was different from humans – which allowed them to heal very fast. The scar on his waist wouldn’t have been there if Sehun had allowed himself at least an hour in his Wolf form. Even now, the scar wasn’t as bad as it could have been. Actually, it was pretty faint, but sadly, still stood pretty vibrantly against his pale skin.

“It was worse than this?” For some reason, Yixing looked a trifle dumbfounded.

“What the hell happened? You are usually very careful. To think that someone got close enough to you that they were able to cut so deep is kind of unsettling.” It was indeed very unsettling. Truth be told, it was the main reason for Sehun’s concern.

“I was not paying attention-”

“Sehun! Yixing didn’t…” Kyungsoo, who has just entered the room, trailed off in shock – his eyes rounder than they usually were – when he saw that his leader was injured.

“What on Earth happened to you?”

“Someone sneaked into our office archives,” Jongin revealed at last, his face a bit too straight to be normal, as Yixing carefully dabbed alcohol on his wound with cotton. It must be freaking burning like a bitch. Sehun knew it because he was in medical school. The fact that Jongin acted like there was nothing going on made him feel disconcerted.

“I went there to retrieve a file when I caught someone snooping through the folders. I got injured because, of course, I wasn’t expecting a company in the dusty storeroom, and from the look on the guy’s face he wasn’t exactly hoping to see me there as well.” Kyungsoo furrowed his brows with an adorably confused expression.

“Why will someone sneak into our archives at the office? There isn’t even anything of importance in those dusty folders.” They kept all the important stuff at some other place that even Sehun didn’t know of.

“Well, apparently there is something important. That intruder wouldn’t have risked getting caught if there wasn’t.” Jongin pointed out with the shrug of his shoulders.

“You guys caught him?” Yixing implored while reaching out for the gauze.

“Did you expect him to escape?” Jongin looked almost offended.

“He may have gotten a chance to catch me off-guard, but I am not an amateur to let him get out of our hands like that. He got injured while fighting us too. They took him to the CCU.”

“Okay, okay. Calm down. I was just asking.” Yixing tried to pacify his patient with a sheepish smile.

“Do you have any idea what he was looking for?” Kyungsoo apparently was more interested in what their intruder wanted than nursing Jongin’s somewhat affronted pride. Sehun couldn’t really fault him for that because he too badly wanted to know that.

It was concerning.

Why would a mere commoner – who wasn’t even a hunter – feel the need to infiltrate their restricted premises? Moreover, it was beyond Sehun’s understanding how he managed to get past all the security without getting detected and successfully got to the storeroom that was located at the very back of the office.

“Not a clue,” Jongin replied with a frown; not appearing very pleased with that detail.

“What was he going through when you caught him?” Kyungsoo interrogated without missing a beat.

“That is what makes the whole deal weird,” Jongin divulged with his lips pressed in a thin line as if he was still trying to make sense out of whatever it was.

“Actually, he as a person was weirder. He started _screaming_ the moment he saw me and didn’t stop even when they dragged him away. He was saying something too, but it was all gibberish and his clothes were so dirty. As if all that wasn’t strange enough, upon checking I found out that he was going through the folder that held the record of the Omegas that shifted during the year 2015. It makes no sense.” Sehun went rigid in his place almost instantly.

_2015…_

_Five years ago._

A cold feeling of dread seized his whole body.

It couldn’t be. So what he shifted in that year. Baekhyun and Minseok did too. It could be a simple coincidence. Why would anyone look for his file? They couldn’t possibly know about the White Wolf, right? Besides, why would a commoner be interested in Wolves? He sounded crazy to Sehun anyway.

“Why would he do that?” Yixing looked fairly puzzled.

“I don’t know.” Jongin sighed before reaching out for his shirt.

“We may have to go through those files to see if there is something out of the ordinary.”

“I _think_ the riskier part is the fact that someone as crazy as him managed to get so far inside a place that was supposed to be guarded and restricted. What the hell was our security doing?” Kyungsoo fumed with a scowl.

“That is what I would like to know too.” Jongin agreed with a thoughtful expression.

“People have been slacking off since the shift of power is near.” Sehun finally spoke up, trying to shake off the goosebumps that he got, and swallowed rather audibly when three pairs of intimidating eyes turned in his direction; wordlessly urging him to go on.

“Since the leaders are going to change, most of the Wolves have been ignorant towards their responsibilities. In addition to that, the head Sentinel has been sick lately so there is no one to keep a check. He is the one who mostly keeps tabs on the security so it is not that surprising there was no one to stop that guy.”

“How do you know that?” Kyungsoo seemed genuinely curious when he asked that question. Knowing that didn’t stop Sehun from panicking. It was another thing that he didn’t let it show on his face.

“The news here travels fast. The head Sentinel got sick almost two months ago and everyone knows about it. Other than that, it is quite easy to pick the changes in the surroundings if you have lived in one place for so many years. The shift in the air has been obvious.” Sehun responded with a shrug in an attempt to appear as indifferent as he could.

“Plus, I work in CCU. Trust me, I will know when the authorities are slacking off on security. I hear my attendees complain about it all the time.”

“Obviously.” Yixing snorted before scooting back a little in his place.

“Anyway, what are you two making for dinner?”

“Kyungsoo said that it was about time we made that traditional dish he learned from his friend while you guys were still in the mountains. Don’t ask me the name. I don’t even know how to pronounce it.” Sehun answered with a wrinkled nose, secretly feeling relieved that they were not asking him any more questions.

“It will take you guys a lot of time to make that. I would have helped if it was something simple, but I have a shift in half-an-hour and was hoping to study a case before going.” Ah- the life of the doctors.

“It is okay. Jongin can help us.” Kyungsoo consoled, completely oblivious to the incredulous look that Sehun directed his way.

_What the hell is he saying?_

“Unless he is busy.”

“I can help.” Jongin agreed without a second of hesitance and stood up while smoothing down the wrinkles in his shirt.

“They gave me an off for the rest of the day.”

Was Sehun the only one who had a problem with that? Shouldn’t Yixing be stopping his patient from working and strictly advise him to rest? Why the hell were they acting as if Jongin doesn’t feel pain or everything was completely normal? He got stabbed for Selene’s sake!

“They gave you an off because you are injured and should rest.” He really couldn’t help himself from protesting. The frown on his face, clearly conveying the displeasure he felt.

Jongin looked at him with a ticked brow.

“I am fine.”

“You got stabbed.” Sehun pointed out with a scoff.

“Last time I checked, it hurts like hell and you are supposed to make minimum movements so that it can heal properly. The repaired tissues can get damaged again if you move around.” He knew that he should stop before the others started asking him the ever dreaded question, ‘ _why did he care so much?_ ’ but he also couldn’t possibly let the whole thing be.

“I am not in pain.” The amused glint in Jongin’s eyes was alarming, but he decided to ignore it altogether in favor of narrowing his eyes. The way that the other male was acting so casual _hurt_.

“That is physically impossible unless you have some kind of a disease where your pain receptors aren’t functioning.” Sehun deadpanned before crossing his arms.

“Seriously, admitting that you are in pain wouldn’t make you any less of an Alpha. I honestly don’t get what goes on in that head of yours. Stop thinking with your knot and bring your nose down a notch. Proud, annoying pricks!” He finished his lecture off with a grumble.

“Well…” Yixing started after a moment of awkward pause which Kyungsoo and Jongin spent gawking at Sehun.

“Sehun is right. When it comes to you, I sometimes forget that you are my patient instead of my leader, and no matter how much you claim not to be in pain it is literally impossible.”

“But-” Jongin started to object but was cut off by his doctor.

“Nope! Bed rest for you. I better not see you working.” Sehun appreciated the fact that Yixing agreed with him. What he didn’t appreciate was the wink that the other male sent his way.

* * *

_Stubborn ass!_

Sehun cursed mentally as he eyed Jongin – the stupid Alpha has refused to go back to his room as if he wanted to spite him – who was casually leaning against the black counter, right beside the stove, without doing or saying anything.

_He could just go back to his room and sleep._

He genuinely didn’t get what the other male was being so difficult for. Besides that, it wasn’t like he was making himself useful. What was he getting out of simply standing there and watching him and Kyungsoo – it was funny how that Alpha looked at Sehun with some kind of newfound respect – bustling about the Kitchen.

“You are deep in thoughts,” Kyungsoo commented dryly while putting a pan over the stove.

“What has gotten into you?”

“I was thinking about the guy we caught. There is something extremely wrong with how things carried out.” Jongin spilled looking somewhat troubled.

“Jongin, that guy single-handedly sneaked into our office without an ounce of fear. It is not just _something_ that is wrong. The whole damn situation is adversity.” Kyungsoo corrected with a huff before oiling the pan.

“That is the thing,” Jongin sighed before straightening up a bit.

“I don’t think that it was an accident. That guy…it wasn’t just a simple stroke of bad luck that he got caught. I have a feeling that he intended for that to happen.”

“Why would he do that? If he came into archives to get something – he was desperate enough that he risked it all – then why would he want to get caught before he even gets to do what he came for? What will he achieve other than nights in a musty prison?” Sehun agreed with Kyungsoo. If the guy really risked it all then why would he want to get caught; at least, before he finished his task. In addition to that, what could be his motivation behind it?

“He isn’t in the prison now, is he?” Jongin reminded with his head slightly cocked to the side.

“Are you implying that he got hurt on purpose so we will send him to the hospital?” Kyungsoo appeared rather distracted as he carefully transferred the vegetables that he had cut earlier into the simmering pan.

“Not any hospital. He did it so that we will send him to the CCU.” The knife in Sehun’s hand almost cluttered against the slab as soon as he heard that.

“Are you sure, Jongin?” Even Kyungsoo seemed a bit disturbed by the new revelation.

“He was skilled. The way he moved and carried himself…he could have put up a better fight. He gave up on purpose. He provoked the guards enough that they would attack him and then stopped. He let them hurt him. He made sure that it was a wound that would take _days_ to heal.” Jongin’s words were virtually ominous. They shrouded the entire Kitchen in a cover of pressing, tense silence.

“What can he possibly want in CCU?” The pan on the stove was almost forgotten. Really, Sehun had to nudge Kyungsoo in his side to remind him that the frying vegetables were beginning to get a little brown.

“I don’t know,” There was a faint hint of fatigue in Jongin’s eyes as he absent-mindedly stared at the wall adjacent to him. He might not be overtly showing it – he was so freaking straight-faced – but Sehun could make out the subtle signs of worry that he was trying so hard to hide. He was fairly successful in doing so too because Kyungsoo didn’t seem to notice it at all, or maybe he did and decided not to comment on it.

“His scent,” Jongin started again after a moment of quiet deliberation.

“It was peculiar.”

“How so?” Kyungsoo needled while skillfully flipping the contents in the pan and simultaneously adding inside it the broth that they have prepared earlier.

“He was human. I am positive that he was because I couldn’t detect the presence of any Wolf inside him, but at the same time, humans aren’t supposed to have such a strong scent. They are especially not supposed to smell like…” Sehun shifted in his place to look at Jongin directly when he suddenly trailed off at the end of his sentence.

“Smell like what?” Kyungsoo urged with a frown.

“Like _death._ ” The air around them became unnaturally muted. An icy, unpleasant sort of hush, charged with dread, fell upon them as soon as those words were out in the open. It was characterized by utter silence as the three of them stopped whatever they were doing in favor of intently staring at each other; almost like doing so would give them the answers they wanted or mayhap, it would make the environment any less uncomfortable.

“Death?” Sehun reiterated with his eye-brows pinched in the middle.

“You won’t understand me unless you smell it yourself,” Jongin claimed with a sigh.

“I can’t put it in words, but there was something so rotten about him. He stank of dead and decaying flesh. His body reeked of blood – of _murder._ ”

“Wolves don’t smell like that,” Kyungsoo mumbled intelligently as if they didn’t know that already.

“Humans don’t smell like death too,” Sehun added in weakly, feeling dizzy with the way his mind was whirring. He was anxiously trying to make sense of the things and at the same time, he was also trying to assure himself that the strange, dangerous intruder wanted to have nothing to do with him. Except, it didn’t work. Something at the back of his mind stayed persistent.

“He could be using one of those scent maskers.” Jongin speculated in a contemplative manner.

“Maybe he wanted to throw us off the track or something. Using scent masking perfumes is not uncommon for the hunters though I don’t get why he would want to smell like decaying flesh.”

“To be honest, from what I have deduced from your explanations so far, that guy is a freaking psychopath.” Kyungsoo declared with a grimace before going back to his work.

“I don’t think we are dealing with a sane criminal. That dude is mentally ill. I can’t think of a single rational motive behind his actions. His actions are driven by pure madness. I don’t think you need to be so worried about him. We have other things to focus on.”

“I guess.” Jongin didn’t look convinced, even Sehun wasn’t, but not having anything better to say he caved in and leaned back against the counter while carelessly spreading his arms to support himself.

“I just can’t help- ugh!” The other male broke off with a grunt, looking more shocked than anything else, and instinctively cradled his left hand which was now spotted with a red, blotchy mark of burn. Apparently while spreading his arms, his hand accidentally came in contact with the pan that Kyungsoo has disposed of on the counter just a few seconds ago.

“Are you alright?” A strong wave of panic rushed through Sehun’s body which impelled him to hastily walk closer to Jongin without a second of hesitation or thought. All he could think of at that moment was the fact that his mate was in pain. Well, he was supposed to be in pain even when he didn’t _look_ like he was.

“What is wrong with you today?” He chided with a huff before taking the Alpha’s hand in his own. Sehun quickly guided him towards the sink before turning on the cold water tap.

“Why do you keep on getting hurt? Be more careful for Selene’s sake! You should have just gone to your room and rested.” He continued in displeasure and gently sprinkled water on the burned area to soothe it.

“Why are you so worried about me?” That question successfully snapped Sehun out of his fretful frenzy. He blinked his eyes blankly for a second or two – in an attempt to grasp his bearings – before looking down at the callous, veiny hand that was in his hold.

A blush took over his cheeks almost instantly though he tried his best to hide it from Jongin’s prying eyes.

_What the fuck, Oh Sehun?_

He mentally scolded himself and let go of the hand as if _he_ was the one getting burned by that contact.

“I-I…” He stuttered out nervously – while trying his best to avoid having eye contact with his two companions – before clearing his throat.

“I am a doctor. Of course, I would be worried if I see someone burning their hand in front of me.”

“Oh, yeah?” There was a lilt of challenge in Jongin’s tone which flustered him more than he already was and as if things weren’t already miserable enough for him Sehun caught sight of Kyungsoo shifting his curious gaze between him and Jongin. It took him a moment, but something seemed to have crossed his mind because he suddenly narrowed his eyes in suspicion while still looking at them.

_Oh boy._

“You two have been acting weird recently.” Kyungsoo posed it as a casual remark, but Sehun easily saw through his façade. He could practically hear the gears of his mind turning.

It was not good.

“Jongin, you especially, have been making some pretty odd comments for the past few days.”

“Ah, really?” Jongin feigned ignorance before giving Sehun a cunning smile.

“It must be the stress. You know, I have been quite busy.” Kyungsoo looked like he had a lot to say about that – something along the lines of him not being stupid – but for some reason, he opted not to and instead settled on staring at Sehun with his stern, wide eyes as if his glare alone could make the younger male speak up.

Sadly for him, Sehun wasn’t that weak-willed.

“I will go and bring the first-aid to treat the burn.” He informed no one in particular – he was simply looking for a way to escape the intense scrutiny that Jongin and Kyungsoo were subjugating him to – and swiftly made his way out of the Kitchen without waiting for a reply.

_Phew!_

* * *

Hey! 

I hope you guys will enjoy reading the chapter ^^

Let me know what you think in the comments

I have been pretty busy lately so they will motivate me.

Thanks! 


	14. Chapter 14

Sehun couldn’t sleep again.

No matter how hard he tried, the peaceful night with its cloudless skies, cool breeze, and a bright, shining Moon – the environment that usually made him feel content – just wouldn’t take him into its embrace. He was missing the warmth which usually led him into a dreamless slumber and surprisingly (well, not that surprising, but still) it wasn’t his Wolf who was at fault. It wasn’t the animal inside him that was keeping him awake that time around. Nope. It was his racing mind that kept him roused despite the sleep and fatigue in his eyes which, once again, wasn’t all that shocking.

He couldn’t shake off Jongin’s words from earlier that evening while they were in the Kitchen. He couldn’t shake off the whole situation. Period. There was something extremely unsettling about every single event that took place. From the intruder, to how he got in, what was his purpose, what was his motivation, what the hell was wrong with his scent, and why did he do what he did…it was all making him feel awfully anxious. There was this nagging at the back of his mind. It insisted that they were in danger and the enemy was closer than they thought him to be – but _who_ was the enemy and _why_ was he against them in the first place?

Sehun had his doubts about that too, but he was too afraid to admit them. He was scared that acknowledging would make the whole thing too real and concrete. He didn’t want to think that someone out there might know about his Wolf because that made no sense. He has been careful. He has always been extremely alert whenever he has shifted. A few days ago, when he has shown his Wolf to his friends, he had made sure that there was no one around, at least, in the hundred meters radius of them.

There was no way he was seen. 

They would have felt the presence if there was someone.

Then what?

Why did his sixth sense persist that it was _him_ who the intruder wanted? They were missing something–

Sehun looked up with a startled gasp when he felt a warm hand wrapping around his’.

“Seriously,” Jongin’s gruff voice dripped inside his ears like sweet honey.

“You should stay away from the fire if you are going to get distracted half-way in whatever you are doing. Your hand would have gotten burned just now.” Blinking his eyes dumbly, Sehun glanced down at their connected hands and let out a small _‘Oh!’_ when he realized what Jongin was talking about.

It gave him an odd sense of déjà vu.

They have been in this exact position a few nights back.

“I-I kind of got lost in my thoughts.” He explained to no one in particular – even when Jongin was the _only_ person there – and pulled his hand out of the other male’s grip despite the way his Wolf whined in protest.

“Another sleepless night, huh?” Jongin guessed before walking towards the stools lined along the marble counter. Sehun couldn’t help, but notice that the Alpha has once again, wordlessly (and very smoothly), invited himself to his usual one-man tea party.

“Yeah, I just have a lot on my mind.” He responded truthfully, after a moment’s hesitation, while adding more water to the kettle so that he could make two cups of herbal tea instead of one.

“I get you,” The amount of weariness in that response made Sehun pause for a second.

“I can’t sleep too. Probably, both of us have the same reason.” They did have the same reason, but Sehun kept mum and continued to work in silence. He placed the cup of scalding hot tea in front of Jongin once he was done and like the night, all those days ago, settled himself on the stool adjacent to the other male. The silence that surrounded them was comfortable enough for Sehun to relax completely as he sipped away at the beverage in his hand. Jongin, too, seemed like he was more than happy being surrounded by the comforting state of hush that wrapped around their bodies like a soft, fuzzy blanket.

“Do you think Kyungsoo is right?” Jongin spoke up all of a sudden, shattering the serenity around them.

“Am I thinking too much?” Biting his lip, Sehun looked down at his pale fingers wrapped around the handle of the mug. He wasn’t sure what he was supposed to say, honestly. He, for a fact, knew that Jongin wasn’t thinking too much. There was something big going on and it would be dangerous as hell if they didn’t catch it in time. The problem was, how could Sehun convey that to Jongin without having to reveal the things that were supposed to be a secret.

“I don’t know,” He responded weakly before looking up.

“Kyungsoo is right. You should focus more on the things that you know rather than those that you don’t because that will take you nowhere.” It was ridiculous how open and inviting Jongin appeared at that moment. It urged Sehun to simply spill his guts out in front of the other and maybe he _should_.

Maybe he should reveal some things.

Maybe he could warn his mate without confirming things.

He was no fool. Jongin already knew a lot of stuff. It was only a matter of confrontation. He knew that the Alpha was waiting for some kind of confirmation from his side. He was waiting for Sehun to make a mistake. Jongin was smart enough to know that without proof, he has nothing on him. He knows that Sehun would deny everything without a moment’s hesitation. That was why he was dancing around him in circles; almost like a predator did around his prey. 

Whatever way he looked at it, Sehun couldn’t deny that Jongin truly was his best bet. He wanted to make sure that everything was dealt with properly, especially considering the fact that he was afraid that it wasn’t only him who was in danger, but Baekhyun and Minseok too.

“Are you saying that I should let it go?” Jongin implored while staring at him intently.

“No, I am saying that you should look at the right places.” Sehun contradicted before training his gaze at the counter thoughtfully.

“Kyungsoo is right. That man seems like a psychopath, but isn’t that an issue in itself?”

“What do you mean?” His companion demanded with furrowed brows making him sigh.

“You know, ever since I got interested in joining CCU I have tried to familiarize myself with criminal psychology. I have read a lot of books, articles, and cases on it to understand the people I will be treating better.” Sehun spared a glance towards the other male to make sure that he was listening because what he was about to relate was important.

“There was this one case of serial killing a few years back. Three people who had absolutely no connection to each other were murdered in cold blood. All the murderer left behind was a bloody voodoo doll with pins stuck in it. People thought the person responsible was someone involved in black magic or the other stuff like that so they searched for clues and proofs in such places. Usually, at first murder, police try to look for the motivation. At the second murder, they look for the connection between the two victims along with the motive. At third senseless killing, they look for someone who is just like our intruder – a psychopath.” He broke off to take another sip of his rapidly cooling tea before continuing.

“They don’t have any pattern or a motive – not one that a sane person would understand – behind their actions. You can’t understand or make sense of what they do. Sounds familiar, yet?”

“So you are implying our intruder really is a psychopath,” Jongin concluded with a ticked brow.

“Is he?” Sehun shot back in a cryptic manner.

“The murderer of the case I am telling you about was neither involved in black magic nor was he a psychopath. He was a cunning, cold-blooded killer whose actual target was the second victim. The first and the third victims along with everything else about the case was merely a distraction. It was a staged drama that sent the police looking for the criminal at the wrong places. How was it possible to find the killer when they didn’t even know who the actual victim was? It is smart, right?” Jongin nodded his head quietly, appearing a bit impressed – Sehun hoped he was impressed by his knowledge and not the murderer of his story because that would be just tragic – and narrowed his eyes in interest.

“It makes sense.” The glazed look in the other male’s eyes was a clear indication that his brain was practically buzzing with theories at that moment.

“All the strange things that seem to contradict one another. That guy is trying to distract us with those to hide something that actually matters.”

“Jongin, your guy fits the definition of a psychopath perfectly – a little bit _too_ perfectly that it makes you think. _This_ is what you should be looking at.” Sehun asserted and nervously tapped his fingers against the counter; debating whether he should say what he was planning on saying next.

In the end, he decided to just go with it.

“Considering the fact that you are still thinking about it…I will assume that there is something that is bothering you. Talk about it to me. You are the person who got to face him first hand. Tell me what is troubling you and maybe we can talk our way out of it. Discussing it will help you get a new perceptive. There is a chance you will be able to see things that you can’t at the moment.”

“That is not a bad idea.” Jongin conceded after a moment of contemplation and put his mug down on the counter in favor of paying full attention to him. If Sehun wasn’t deluding himself, then there was an excited glint in his eyes as if he has been waiting all day for someone to say those words to him; as if he was dying to speak his mind, but wasn’t sure whether he was looking too much into things or not.

“Go on then.” Sehun prompted while biting his bottom lip to suppress the smile that was threatening to take over his features.

“Give me the first thing that isn’t sitting well with you.”

“How did he get in?” Jongin shot without missing a beat.

“I know you said that the security has been slacking off. Maybe we even have a traitor inside. I’m not rejecting those possibilities, but still, things just don’t seem to add up.”

“What is not adding up?” Sehun crossed his arms over the counter and rested his head atop them.

“Think about it,” Jongin insisted with a wrinkled forehead.

“Let’s go by the theory that he is pretending to be a crazy psychopath. Put yourself in his shoes. You are some commoner, a _human_ , who is trying to sneak into the office to get to the storeroom that is at the very back. You are clever enough to know that if you want to get there – the _only_ way to get there, actually – you would have to somehow evade more than thirty Wolves that are working in the main area and you are well aware of their sharp sense of smell. As a human, your biggest advantage is the mildness of your scent. No one will notice it unless they are particularly seeking it out. Why will you feel the need to sabotage yourself then? Why will you douse yourself in such a strong scent knowing that it will immediately, without any difficulty, bring all the attention to you?”

“He didn’t get any attention, did he? He didn’t get caught while sneaking in.” Sehun immediately pointed out before straightening up in interest; his mind buzzing with several thoughts.

“ _Why_ didn’t he?” He prodded with intent.

“If his scent was as strong as you say then why did no one in the office notice it? We can have one traitor among us. The whole staff working on that floor couldn’t have been in on that scheme. How did he go unseen then? How come no one detected his scent before you? From what I can tell, your intruder knew that his scent – or the scent masker – was the least of his concern. The question is how?”

“I have no answer for that,” Jongin replied with a despondent sigh before lazily tracing the rim of his mug.

“Move on to the next thing then. We will come back to this later.” Sehun urged in a lame attempt to raise their spirits. He knew he wasn’t being very helpful, but he was still thankful when the other male shot him a small smile before his tensed shoulders relaxed a bit again.

“Why did he feel the need to sneak in?” Jongin projected the question that was repeatedly niggling against his conscious.

“He was going through the folder that held the list of the Omegas who shifted in a particular year, but that kind of knowledge is something that is public. He didn’t have to risk it all. He could have gotten that information out of any loud-mouthed resident of our town. I feel like if he went this far to reach those files-”

“Then whatever he is searching for isn’t the knowledge that a loud-mouthed resident can help him with.” Sehun completed Jongin’s sentence for him with a pensive look on his face.

“He is not searching for the names because he already has that information. He went into our archives to look for more. Something tells me it wasn’t for the sake of confirming what he already knew. He was searching for something else entirely in there.”

“That is what I have been thinking.” Jongin approved with a hum.

“What can it be? If he already has the names what else is he looking for? Did something unusual happened that year?” Sehun pressed his lips in a thin line as soon as he heard the last question.

“Want to know something interesting?” He inquired weakly after staying quiet for half-a-minute.

_This is it!_

_You can do it._

It was, at last, the time for him to hand out information to Jongin. The sort of information that could put all his secrets at risk, but Sehun was sure that they were already well past that stage by then. Jongin knew. He has no way to confirm it, but something inside him was convinced that the Alpha knew about who and what he was. If he remained discreet enough, he could lead Jongin in the right direction without confirming anything that he would regret in the future. He just has to play smart.

“Sure, what is it?” Jongin looked over at him in curiosity.

“That year, five years ago,” Sehun started hesitantly while furiously tapping his left foot against the bottom railing of the stool he was occupying.

“It is the one in which I, Baekhyun and Minseok shifted-” He bit his tongue at the little slip up he made.

“Well, of course, I didn’t! Still, you will find our names in that list too.” Sehun hastily amended before averting his gaze away from Jongin’s piercing eyes. For a second, he was sure that the other male would call him out on his bullshit, but he didn’t. Perhaps, it was because of the implication that his words made. If Jongin knew about his Wolf – _the_ White Wolf – then it shouldn’t be hard for him to get what Sehun was trying to insinuate.

“If I look through that file will there be something out of the ordinary in there?” Jongin questioned carefully after a moment of tense silence.

“Let’s say if I was late and that guy had gotten his hands on your record. Would it have helped him?”

“No.” Sehun declared confidently because he knew that Jaehyun has wiped away every single thing that connected Sehun to the Beta who has tried to forcefully mate with him. There was an official record of that monster’s death – they had to inform his family that their son/brother was no longer in the world – but even in that the Head Alpha had made sure that his name won’t be mentioned. No one knew that he was there to guard Sehun. Heck! They didn’t even know that the Head Alpha has hired someone to guard the cabin of one of the Omegas of the packhouse since in their eyes there was no reason for him to.

Minseok and Baekhyun had their families and Sehun supposedly had his brother.

No one in the town was aware of what happened that day. In fact, except for his family and Dr. Lee, there weren’t many people who knew about Sehun’s _condition_. People thought that he was normal. It was the main reason why he has managed to keep his secret hidden for so long. Yeah, his absence at the Blue Moon raised a few questions in earlier years, but Jaehyun had been quick to shoot them down by claiming that Sehun liked to spend the occasion with his uncle who was from another pack.

“Are you sure, Sehun?” Jongin cocked his head to the side.

“Why are you talking about me only?” Sehun feigned innocence. He wanted to get his point across. He wanted to make sure that the other male knew he wasn’t going to get any confirmation out of him. He wasn’t going to claim that he was special in any way.

“There is nothing out of the ordinary in those files. I, Baekhyun and Minseok, _all three of us_ , we went through the pretty standard process of shifting.” He emphasized on the part ‘all three of us’ to let the Alpha know that he wasn’t singling himself out. The look of annoyance that crossed Jongin’s features told Sehun that the other male was indeed hoping to trap him with his own words.

_Hah!_

_Dream on._

_I am too smart to fall for that._

“You apparently didn’t shift.” His companion reminded him in an extremely sarcastic tone.

“I hope you are not forgetting that.”

“Of course not!” Sehun assured with a subtle smirk that seemed to have annoyed Jongin because he narrowed his eyes at him.

“My condition. It is something extraordinary, but that is for the medical files, not official documents and before you ask, my medical file is safe with Yixing.”

“I will still ask Chanyeol or Jongdae to go through those folders,” Jongin mumbled – more to himself than anyone else – before looking up again.

“My third concern.” He claimed and held up three fingers, reminding Sehun of what they were initially discussing.

“It may sound a little weird since I was the one to claim that our intruder got hurt on purpose and he planned on getting caught all along, but…”

“But?” Sehun pressed when he noticed that Jongin was being reluctant.

“The surprise on his face when he saw me was genuine. He wasn’t faking it. I have trained for years. I know how to read people well. Everything else he did was staged, but he was truly shocked to see me. It was the only moment he failed to keep his mask on.” Jongin shared with a speculative look on his face.

“If he wanted to get caught as we are assuming why would he get shocked to see me?”

“What if he did want to get caught, but just not by _you_?” Sehun’s response was random. He didn’t have any particular line of thought when he said that. It was simply the first thing that came to his consciousness. He was aware of the fact that he was shooting blindly in the air, but at the same time, something was beginning to click at the back of his mind.

“Tell me, Jongin. How often do you go to the storeroom yourself? How often does one of the guys go there? Isn’t it mostly one of the junior employees who fetch these kinds of things for you? If that guy is smart enough to hatch this whole plan then he is smart enough to know that the people who hold bigger offices don’t visit dusty storerooms because they have other people who do that stuff for them.”

“What difference does it make if it is anyone else or me?” Jongin countered without missing a beat.

“Yeah, I don’t frequently go to that place. Today was a pure coincidence, but does it even matter? In the end, he got what he wanted.”

“On what cost though?” Sehun argued with a frown.

“Don’t forget that you actually saw through his act. Was it a part of his plan as well?”

“Depends,” Jongin faltered, not looking convinced by his idea, but not entirely discarding it either.

“If there was some junior employ instead of me, would they have bothered to notice all those things that I did before calling the security? Would they have stopped to observe?”

“I doubt it.” Sehun expressed before stretching his stiff back a little with a grunt.

“Me too.” Their chance agreement lapsed them into yet another comfortable silence which they spent mostly mulling over what they have discussed so far.

“His plan was perfect.” Jongin praised all of a sudden.

“It really was until I showed up. I am the flaw in his well-knit scheme.”

“You saw through him.” Sehun acquiesced right away, having settled on that same conclusion.

“That was not supposed to happen. He was just supposed to be another criminal who the doctors at the CCU would have declared as mentally unstable which was his ultimate goal. That would have led to his long term stay at the hospital.”

“Everything comes down to the CCU, Sehun.” It really did all come down to CCU and Sehun knew exactly why. From the look on Jongin’s face, he was well aware of it as well.

“He wants to stay there to be close to either you or Baekhyun. It is no coincidence that this guy was going through the folders that particularly included your names and now he showed up only after you guys joined the hospital there.” The other male continued grimly.

“From what I can tell, he is trying to confirm something.” That statement had Sehun thinking. What was it that he was trying to confirm? Why did he specifically choose CCU? Why did he only show up after they started their rotation? Why not follow them in the University?

“That guy knows that Minseok is not the person he is looking for. I don’t know how, but he does. He is confused between you and Baekhyun.”

_He is confused about who the White Wolf is between us._

That realization zapped through his brain like an electric current. How did that guy know that a White Wolf existed in the first place if he hasn’t seen Sehun? It wasn’t like White Wolves were common. It wasn’t like there was some kind of a pattern that would lead someone to think that one was born in their generation.

Or was there?

Were there any signs that gave away the evidence of his birth? Were there hunters or Wolves out there with that kind of knowledge? White Wolves were special and before him, his kind was discovered by power-hungry monsters. What made him think that he was special? What made him think that the White Wolves before him hadn’t tried to keep their existence a secret?

_Why has it never crossed my mind before?_

_Why did Hawk never say anything about it?_

Thinking about it now, why did Hawk decide to join the group of hunters to ensure his safety? What was it exactly that he wanted to keep an eye on? The elder male never really specified it to him.

Sehun felt his hands shaking in terror.

_Hawk knows._

_There are signs and he knows about them._

His shifting process was different. He took three days. No other Wolf went through three days of torture like him. It must be it. That intruder somehow found out about it.

Was it the nurse who spilled the beans?

Sehun didn’t really know what became of her. He never bothered to ask what punishment she was given for abandoning him like that on his first day of shifting. However, she was the only one who knew that a Beta guard was assigned to him. She was the only one who knew that the guard was killed. She was the only one who knew that something went wrong with him.

It was thought-provoking.

Why a trained, sedated Beta would be killed while he was doing his job – a job that he has kept for years – unless he did something to warrant it? What else could he do other than trying to take advantage of the Omega he was protecting? Why would he do that though? Something made Sehun special and it was enough for the people who were looking for the right things to reach an accurate deduction.

_That was what he was looking for._

_He was going through those files to see whether it was Baekhyun or me who was assigned the guard._

But if he got all that information from that nurse wouldn’t he already know that it was Sehun, not Baekhyun. If it was not the nurse then who was it?

“Sehun.” Jongin’s gentle voice snapped the said male out of his horrifying reverie.

“You are shaking.” The expression in his eyes was so intense that for a second Sehun found it hard to breathe. Those warm brown orbs were virtually begging him to reveal the truth. They were begging him to have some faith in his mate, but he couldn’t do that. If he did, it will confirm things, and if he confirmed things then…

“I-It must be the cold.” Sehun felt like an absolute ass, especially when he caught the flash of disappointment on Jongin’s face before the Alpha skillfully masked it.

_I’m sorry._

He truly was, but he couldn’t do anything about it. Too much was at risk.

“Your scent,” Jongin pronounced after a brief pause and looked at him straight in the eye again. Sehun's heartbeat stuttered for a second or two before it started racing.

“It smells like burnt sugar when you are distressed.”

“What?” What the hell was he talking about?

“You heard me.” Jongin shrugged his shoulders before casually getting up from his seat.

“Your scent usually has a citrusy tint to it mixed with something sweet, but I have noticed that it changes when you are anxious.”

“That is not possible.” Sehun refused to believe that. As Wolves, they were able to smell each other’s pheromones, but no one has the ability to smell _emotions._

“No one has ever smelled my emotions before.”

“I think we both know why I am the only one who did, Sehun,” Jongin remarked in a matter-of-fact manner before vaguely gesturing in the direction of the mug that was now empty.

“Thanks for the tea and don’t be so scared. I promise that guy won’t be able to reach you as long as I am here.”

Sehun so badly wanted to say something, but the sincerity in the other male’s voice kept him tongue-tied. His heart was literally throbbing inside his chest as a subtle wave of pain traveled through his body; totally unwarranted and unwanted. He could do or say nothing – he didn’t know whether he wanted to stop the other from leaving or to simply tell him that he didn’t need his protection to keep up the façade that he has built – when Jongin muttered a distracted ‘good night’ in his direction before exiting the Kitchen.

_Selene, you are awful for doing this to me._

He didn’t want to feel so bad about what he did. It wasn’t like it was something wrong. It was his secret and he has the right to decide who he would tell and who he would keep it from. Jongin has no right to hold it against him.

Why then was he feeling like the biggest jerk in the world?

Letting out a sigh, he looked down at his now cold tea and tried his best to ignore the tug of longing at his heart. It was ridiculous. He didn’t have any feelings for Jongin. As a matter of fact, he has never harbored romantic feelings towards anyone in his whole life. He couldn’t afford to have them and that was the fact that Sehun, along with his Wolf, was well aware of. Why was he beginning to yearn for things then that could ruin everything he has worked so hard to protect? Why was his Wolf acting so rashly then? Why couldn’t he just ignore the stupid connection that existed between him and Jongin? Why was the idea of giving in so tempting when he knew the consequences would be disastrous?

It scared him.

Immensely.

They weren’t even mated yet. How worse would it be if, in the future, he has to give in to the elders’ wishes and accept the bond? Sehun knew that he couldn’t put it off forever, especially if at some point Minyoung and Jaehyun personally asked him to accept it. He would never be given the liberty to reject the bond, but that didn’t mean he wouldn’t put up a fight.

_No one understands…_

Truth be told, it was wretched how he already knew what the elders would want once the existence of his White Wolf came to their knowledge. They wouldn’t see the possible dangers and consequences. All they would care about was the fact that their head Alpha would become the strongest of the Wolves which would subsequently make the Selene pack stronger than it already was. They would never care about what Sehun wanted. They would never try to understand _why_ and what he felt.

_Will Jongin care?_

It would be nice if he did.

Sehun was sure that he would understand him (at least, to some extent), but that didn’t automatically fix things. At the end of the day, Jongin has just as much responsibility towards the pack – he was the _Silver Wolf_ – as he has towards his mate; if not more. Sehun didn’t and _couldn’t_ judge him for that. He has no right to. It would be unfair of him to expect the Alpha to simply give in to his wishes when he has other obligations.

_Are my wishes even logical?_

That was the most frustrating thing.

Sehun wasn’t sure anymore whether what he wanted was within reason or not; whether he was being smart or dumb. He didn’t know what was right and wrong anymore. Everyone around him, who knew his secret, wanted him to just give in. Were all of them wrong? It wasn’t possible. Then, was he the one who wasn’t dealing with things in the right way? He has no idea. It was terrifying, how the future of Selene was in his’ and Jongin’s hand at the moment and everyone around them was blissfully ignorant of the impending danger.

_What can we do?_

He and Jongin have only two options.

They could accept the bond which would ultimately reveal Sehun’s identity as the White Wolf and that, without any doubt, would lead to pack wars. The other option was to reject the bond. What good would that bring them though? The Silver Wolf could only ever mate with his destined one. If Sehun rejected the bond, the blood-line of the Silver Wolves would come to an end. The blessing of Selene on their pack would come to an end.

“This is torture.” Sehun groaned out loud before standing up. He needed to sleep if he didn’t want to be late for his shift tomorrow.

* * *

Hey!

I hope you guys enjoyed reading the chapter ^^

Things will be getting interesting from now on so...gear up maybe xDDD

Please comment and let me know what you think of the chapter.

Kudos are always appreciated and since this fic is about to hit 1000 kudos soon I have a gift for you all in store when it happens so let's see <333


	15. Bonus Chapter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay!   
> So first of all THANK YOU SO MUCH for your support <3333  
> I can't believe this fic surpassed 1000 kudos so soon. I wasn't expecting it at all, but hey! Now I am extremely happy.   
> Here is the promised reward which is JONGIN'S POV (at least somewhat xD) that you all have been asking me for. I told you that you will have your questions answered in due time, right?   
> This is honestly the perfect timing ^^ because despite being a bonus chapter it is very important. I am sure it will clear up a lot of things, create more confusion, and may even change the way some people see sekai's relationship.   
> I hope you will enjoy it.  
> Plus, I have something else too for you guys.   
> Look out for it at the end of the chapter <33

_Jongin_

“Where are you going?” Jongin, who has just stepped out of his tent, turned his head to the side to face Junmyeon who was sitting by the fire that they have earlier started to generate some warmth and light – two things that were greatly unnecessary given that they were Wolves and were supposed to have an extraordinary vision. Moreover, cold was a concept that was foreign to them after spending more than half their lives in the harsh, sordid frost of the Mountains.

“I feel a bit restless so I was thinking about making a short run in the woods.” The frown of disapproval graced his brother’s features almost immediately.

“Do you think that is a good idea? We are not in our pack grounds at the moment. This is unclaimed land and is filled with stray Wolves.” Nodding his head, Jongin trailed his gaze around the shadowy trees. It wasn’t exactly a _safe_ idea, but it also wasn’t something that he couldn’t handle.

“It will be alright. Don’t worry. I am going to linger around and not go too far. You should head inside your tent though.”

“I am on watch.” Junmyeon revealed with a sigh.

“Why do you think I am here instead of being with my mate?”

“I am out here,” Jongin assured with a chuckle.

“You can head inside. I can keep watch.”

“Are you sure?” Despite his question, Junmyeon was already getting up from his place; seemingly looking ready to head inside.

Jongin rolled his eyes.

“Yeah, yeah. Go already.”

“Okay then, see you in the morning.”

…………

If he was, to be honest, Jongin was pretty damned confused by his Wolf. He didn’t understand what on Earth did the animal inside him want. It was being stubborn and restless – almost as if it was delirious with the need of something – which in turn made him feel rotten and grumpy because they have been on their legs for the past few days. He didn’t know about others, but he was looking forward to a night full of peaceful sleep. Alas! His obstinate Wolf has other plans.

It was rather annoying considering the fact that he usually mastered great control over his animalistic side. There must be something extremely off if his Wolf was ignoring his wishes and was practically forcing him to leave his comfortable sleeping bag to go outside to do absolutely nothing other than perhaps wasting time. Normally, Jongin would have ignored it, but there was a hunch inside him that whatever it was that his Wolf wanted, it was important. There was an unfathomable feeling…a feeling that he couldn’t describe. It was like all these years he has been deprived of some blessing and now it was finally close by. His Wolf recognized it and the stubborn thing was not going to stop until or unless he has landed his paws on it.

His legs were moving as if they had a mind of their own. A fervent sort of desperation filled his being. He felt as if he was in a trance solely guided by a pull that grabbed him from the very core of his soul and forced him to move closer and closer – like a sweet, seductive trap that he was a willing victim of – until he couldn’t anymore. He was clearly headed in some direction; the destination which evaded Jongin’s consciousness was something that his Wolf seemed fairly clear about.

Despite realizing how dangerous and utterly foolish of him it was to wander away from his friends and blindly follow his Wolf’s instincts, Jongin simply couldn’t stop himself. It was obviously a risk to go so far from his companions in an unclaimed land – never mind the fact that he was one of the strongest if not the most – especially when the air was so thick and humid with moisture (it was about to rain any second) which might give a rouge Wolf an idea that he was completely helpless and clueless.

Usually, Wolves are not able to detect scents in rain, but after years of training, Jongin has acquired some extraordinary skills. Of course, his sense of smell didn’t function as well as it would normally, but if the enemy (or anyone really) was close enough or their pheromones were strong enough, he was able to detect them in the rain as well. So really, an attack was going to be more of a hassle rather than anything else.

Jongin was pulled out of his thoughts the second his legs came to a stop. It was quite sudden and abrupt, leaving him a bit dumbfounded, but he soon forgot all about his confusion when he caught the sight of the Wolf on the other side of the stream.

What the hell?

He wasn’t hallucinating, was he?

It was either a very warped dream or he was really seeing a White Wolf inside the claimed grounds of Selene. The pack that he was supposed to take charge of within less than a month.

That was definitely not going to make his experience pleasant and easy.

Shaking his body slightly, Jongin moved closer towards the bank of the stream trying his best to stay silent. Thus far, his presence has gone completely unnoticed by the other Wolf – wasn’t that surprising since he was known to be pretty light on his feet despite having a large Wolf – and he wanted to keep it that way for as long as possible.

It was only then when he had successfully hidden his body behind the bush did he notice how peaceful the animal inside him suddenly was. It was almost as if he has found what he was looking for; as if all along he was trying to lead Jongin to the White Wolf.

_Mate._

The word flashed through his brain like a thunderclap.

Was it possible?

It was, wasn’t it?

The seer of their pack had seen his mate’s mark on a patch of white fur. Everyone has assumed that Jongin’s mate was someone with bi-colored fur. He, himself, has believed the same till then. _No one_ has ever considered the possibility that it could be the White Wolf too even though they should have.

White Wolves were rare, but they still existed.

They were still part of reality.

The sudden epiphany disoriented him a bit which consequently made him stumble. It made the leaves under his paws crunch which almost immediately alerted the utter spectacle of beauty on the other side of the stream. He wasn’t even kidding. Whoever it was, the pure white fur made them look ethereal. Jongin couldn’t even bring himself to move his eyes away from the captivating scene in front of him. It was way too fascinating, the manner in which the silver moonlight created a halo around the White Wolf making him appear as if it was something out-worldly – almost like an Angel.

The thought made him cringe.

When did _he_ get so sentimental?

Grimacing mentally – it was so freaking out of his character –Jongin shifted his gaze up and simultaneously felt himself going (ridiculously) breathless when their eyes met.

Those eyes…

They were beautiful.

The oceanic blue hue that omitted off of them was wrenching air out of his lungs and in its stead, all that was left behind was a burning need; a burning need to be closer. A burning, _animalistic_ need to claim what was made to be his’. That urge alone was toxic beyond belief – his mate wasn’t an object – but Wolves (animals in general) weren’t exactly known to be concerned with basic codes of human decency. It was his job to keep those desires and impulses under the wraps.

Noticing that his mate was observing him – instead of running away for obvious reasons – Jongin allowed his legs to slowly carry him towards the stream until half his legs were submerged in the water. He tilted his head to the side and critically observed the other as different sorts of emotions slowly flashed across his shining blue orbs. A part of him wondered, why didn’t his mate just run away? There was palpable panic in his eyes and Jongin knew for a fact that his presence there wasn’t welcomed.

What was it that stopped the other?

It was possible that his mate was underestimating his skills at the moment. To be fair, he wouldn’t be offended if that was the case because normal Wolves weren’t strong enough to stand against the force of the rapidly flowing water, but as mentioned before Jongin was highly trained.

Crossing that stream was a piece of cake for him.

As if to convey just that, he confidently took a step further inside the stream and suppressed the urge to grin wolfishly when the realization (the message he was trying to convey) appeared to have dawned on his mate.

The reaction was instant.

The other Wolf froze in his place before a distressed whimper filled with avid anxiety permeated the otherwise peaceful atmosphere.

Jongin stopped dead in the middle of his tracks when he felt that sound seizing his whole being. How was it possible for such an insignificant and minute sound to have such a profound effect on him? How could some stranger – never mind that they were mates – make him feel the way he was feeling? It didn’t make any sense. It was beyond the comprehension of logic. It was outrageous. A very bitter pill for him to swallow. If he was to be truthful, it was kind of annoying too.

Kim Jongin was someone who used his brain a lot more than he used his heart. Destiny, bonds, and mates were more of a black hole for him – he was utterly lost when it came to them. It was bizarre, but he wanted to comfort his mate. He wanted to do it so badly.

That was easier in theory, but not in practice though.

He knew that the other Wolf wanted him gone. He did not beseech any sort of comfort from him. Instead, he wanted to be left alone. Something, that neither Jongin, himself nor his Wolf was ready to do. It would explain why, after a long, passive minute of not doing anything other than, of course, staring at each other Jongin finally leaped; totally ignoring the rain that has started pelting down on them.

A strong growl that rumbled from somewhere deep inside – without any conscious permission from him – tore through his throat the moment his mate turned towards the opposite side and started running. It was a futile effort, honestly. The chase was thrilling and all, but it was also useless. Jongin was more than capable of tracing the other Wolf down.

There was a brief moment of insecurity that settled in the obscure crevices of his mind when he remembered that just like him his mate should have been able to tell that they shared a bond.

Why was he running away then?

Did he not feel it?

If he was being honest, then it didn’t _look_ like the other has realized who he was. It was, in a way, not impossible. When it came to destined mates and stuff, Jongin wasn’t quite as educated as he would like to be, and seriously deeming something as possible or impossible was somewhat out of his area of expertise. His parents could most probably tell him more about it...but that was the concern for later.

The strong smell of _burnt sugar_ – a very peculiar scent for an Omega if you asked him – assaulted his sense of smell the instant he was on the land again. He felt a trifle drunk on it and would have stayed there to enjoy it for, at least, a moment longer, if it wasn’t for the more pressing impulse to pursue his mate who has already stopped running.

He couldn’t have gone too far.

Jongin followed the trail of the scent, feeling positively delirious, easily navigating through the twisted turns that the other Wolf has taken to confuse him and only came to a sudden halt when his mate’s pheromones started to imminently overlap with the strong fragrance of the flowers in the area. 

It was smart, but sadly, not enough to deter him.

Turning his body around with a seeking nose – he has noticed the prints in the mud as well, but the area that they were currently in was covered with dead leaves which meant that he could hardly make out anything else – Jongin tried to locate the familiar, intoxicating scent that he has been following and stilled when he caught the whiff of it again coming from the largest tree in the vicinity. From how the intensity of the scent has changed, he could very well tell that the other Wolf has shifted into his human form.

Jongin took a step forward (feeling excitement pooling low in his stomach), then two, then three, and then-

A loud howl from Junmyeon snapped him out of the daze that was clouding his better judgment all along. Feeling his heart literally beating inside his throat, he shook his head and reluctantly scooched back to his previous place.

_What the hell was he doing?_

No! The better question was what the hell was happening to him? How come he lost control over his Wolf…so much so that he allowed him to dominate his thoughts, instincts, and body like that? For the past fifteen minutes, it has almost felt like his conscious mind has taken a back seat and has allowed the savage beast inside him to take the steering.

Has he really risked getting in some unwarranted trouble just to follow a random Wolf? Admittedly, it was his mate, not to mention the _White Wolf_ as well, but that didn’t change the fact that he knew better than that.

Even now, it was so damn tempting.

What was wrong with it anyway? There was nothing heinous about him wanting to see who his mate was and how he looked like in person. It wasn’t an unreasonable wish to meet him, talk to him, and get to know him, but Jongin also was smart enough to get the message.

His mate didn’t want the same as him.

He respected his wishes too.

Or so he told himself.

A part of him knew that it was all some bull-shit excuse to somehow blot out the fact that _he_ wasn’t mentally prepared to meet his mate, at long last. Like his father, or any other Silver Wolves before him, he has expected to know who his mate was by the age of twenty at maximum, but as fate has played things out he was still as clueless about his destined half as he was three years ago; well, at least, he was up until just twenty minutes ago.

Frankly speaking, no one ever really bothered to ask him – they all assumed that just because his partner was decided by Selene, he was automatically excited about it – what he thought about the entire mate business. It was unfair, really, because he wasn’t all that thrilled when he first came to know about it. Maybe, it had something to do with the fact that he hadn’t expected to present as a Silver Wolf which meant that he was not at all ready. It was supposed to be Junmyeon from the very beginning anyway, but according to the elders nothing was set in the stone. There have been a few cases like Jongin’s before. It wasn’t all that new. The possibility was always there. After all, it was the work of fate and its course has never exactly been predictable.

Jongin agreed with the last bit whole-heartedly.

Selene definitely had something big cooking up in that scheming head of hers. She was definitely bored out of her mind taking into consideration the way she was changing up the pace of things. What were the odds that two anomalies would occur in the same generation? Not only their generation of leaders has the youngest Silver Wolf as the Head Alpha, but that Silver Wolf has the rare White Wolf – he wasn’t very certain about the ratio, but he has read somewhere that on average there is one White Wolf every forty to fifty years – as his mate.

It was all messed up and that is what Jongin hated about the whole situation, precisely.

He hated the idea of being a puppet at the Goddess’s hands. He hated the idea that he was chosen as the Silver Wolf when it should have been his brother. He hated the idea of having a mate. He hated the stronghold of determinism in his life. For fuck’s sake, he wasn’t even given a chance to choose who he wanted to mate with. Perhaps, if he has known all along he would have made peace with that fact, but as someone who has spent at least the starting fifteen years of his life not having a single clue that he was supposed to be the future Head Alpha of the pack he has never entertained the possibility of having his mate already picked for him.

He wasn’t a romantic person as per se – he was more of a cold reason type – and honestly, there was nothing wrong with his mate being already chosen, but Jongin was the kind of person who liked to have freedom and authority. He was simply against the idea because he loathed the fact that Selene felt the need to govern almost every aspect of his being, leaving him with no choice, but to _accept_.

If he was going to be the Silver Wolf, he would have ardently liked to know about it beforehand so that he could have prepared for it accordingly. It would have been far better than the hurried muddle that his life became once he presented as a Silver Wolf. The expectations, the pressures, the doubts (whether he would be cut for it or not), and the constant need to prove himself worthy…it has been the kind of hell that he had wanted to avoid which was why he wasn’t exactly sad when they weren’t able to find his mate on time. He needed time to adjust to his new life and throwing a mate in the mix would have complicated things further for him.

Jongin was certain that at some point he would have ultimately taken some of his resentment out on his unsuspecting mate. He wasn’t an unreasonable guy, but everyone had their limits. He did too. Plus, he never claimed to be a perfect person. Yeah, he might be extraordinarily genius when it came to some things, but having a high IQ didn’t mean that he automatically acquired the wisdom of the whole world. Wisdom and maturity was something that came with experience and age. Jongin knew he was far away from it – far away from being a perfect leader – even then. As much as he didn’t want to admit it, he was liable to make errors still.

Moreover, finding his mate would have meant instant claiming ceremony (at the mere age of twenty!), and instant claiming ceremony would have meant the added expectations and responsibility of providing a healthy heir to the pack. It was a never-ending cycle of things that would have potentially destroyed him and his mate simultaneously. They would have made one unhappy couple if you asked him.

For that very reason, Jongin was being skeptical even now. He could easily leap forward and be done with the whole deal. At the end of the day, mate or not, it was just going to be some person he was expected to love and cherish without any particular reasons or motives. He could do that…maybe?

It was all cool.

Not like he was some kind of an emotional sap. Their bond should be enough for them. In fact, their bond was the very reason why Jongin decided to stay loyal to his unknown mate and denounced any sort of relationship (physical or non-physical) with others once they confirmed that _yes,_ his mate did exist somewhere in the world.

Of course, spending his ruts alone was not easy, but it wasn’t something that he couldn’t handle, bearing in mind the fact that in their training they were required to master control over their Wolves and instincts during the most vulnerable of times. As they have been taught, _‘enemy won’t wait to attack our land just because you are in a rut’ –_ it made sense, but that didn’t make anything easier. 

What was really stopping him then?

Was he doing it out of spite?

He did hate the fact that it was his Wolf who has forced him to chase his mate almost against his free will. Things would have been different if he had done it on his own after thinking everything through, but now it was simply embarrassing. He was known to have the most stable connection with his Wolf and his control over the animal inside him was impeccable among his friends. It was ridiculous how easily his consciousness has been taken over.

Chasing the White Wolf was purely instinctual. He was filled with a burning desire to be close to his mate, something that has been instilled in him by Selene…it wouldn’t be a lie to say that his hesitance was to some extent a form of rebellion against the Goddess’ relentless control over him. If he caved, it meant that he gave in to her wishes, _yet again._

Or maybe it was his fear – if it could be called that.

He feared change.

Actually, not change specifically, but the abrupt and sudden shift in things. Yeah, that was what irritated the hell out of him. He was good at handling them – if he was to say for himself – but that didn’t mean that he enjoyed them too.

After suffering through years of unrest in his life, things were finally beginning to settle down. He has finally managed to fully adjust to his role and conformed to his title. He was ready to take up the responsibilities that he was expected to carry on his shoulders. Will suddenly acquiring a mate throw everything off the loop once again?

There was only one way to know.

_Now’s not the time._

Whatever the reason was, the situation they were in was not how he wanted to meet his other half. The other Wolf was clearly scared and agitated. Jongin was positive that imposing himself on his mate and trying to get to talk to him now was going to be futile. There was also the possibility that the other would shift back into his Wolf and would refuse to show him his human form. No matter how persistent he could be there was so much that he could do while keeping in mind the fact that he did not want to start their relationship on a bad note. He already has too much on his plate to deal with. Having a mate who hated him was the last thing he wanted.

Besides, he was sure that if he didn’t hurry back now Junmyeon and most probably Chanyeol would come looking for him. He did not want anyone to know about the White Wolf. At least, not until he has slept on it for a night and has thought everything through.

_Yeah, definitely not the right time._

Deciding that it was for the best, he turned around in his place and howled back as an acknowledgment so that his friends won’t feel the need to follow him. He indulged himself in the odd scent of his mate for a moment longer (he just can’t help it, can he?) before finally running towards the stream again.

* * *

Hey! 

I hope that you guys enjoyed the chapter ^^

Now coming towards the second part of the bonus I am going to throw Jongin towards you guys xDD LOL! Not literally of course, but I have decided to do a Q/A session with the characters.

You guys can ask any questions you have - except for ones that will force me to reveal the future of the story - to clear out any misunderstandings or maybe there was an instant where you wanted to know a certain's character perceptive, but I didn't give, you can ask for that too. You guys can directly ask questions from the characters and they will answer you as truthfully as I let them xDDD 

There are just a few rules,

1\. Do not be rude 

2\. Do not probe _too_ much into the future plot of the story. You can ask about things that have happened already, but not what will happen.

3\. You can ask questions directly from the author too. I promise she is nice ^^

4\. I will take q's only from the comment section

5\. Per user, you are allowed to ask only two questions, for my sanity you know xD

6\. If I find it necessary to hold some information that I think will ruin my future plans, I will keep that to myself.

7\. Remember that all my charas are assigned a certain role and while giving answers they will conform to it which means that their attitudes will shine through and things that they are not aware of won't magically become apparent to them ^^

PLEASE DON'T LET THIS FLOP LMAO!

I will be waiting for your questions.

Also, I will be posting answers to ten q's at the end of every update.

Thanks!


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter #15

_Fuck!_

_I am late._

Sehun knew that it would happen, especially when yesterday he had spent more than half of the night talking with Jongin. He didn’t exactly regret it, but he also wasn’t happy with the slight ache in his head that came with the lack of proper rest and sleep. Admittedly, he should be used to the feeling, but the past few days have successfully spoilt him. He no longer wished to feel like his head would explode any second.

“Sehun!” Jongdae’s loud and bright voice called out for him before he could even start the engine of the car.

_What now?_

“Hey, don’t drive away just yet.” The other male continued shouting at the top of his lungs – which _did not_ help him with the headache – while running in his direction.

Sehun begrudgingly rolled down the window of the driver’s seat.

“Make it quick, Jongdae.”

“Can you wait a minute?” Jongdae requested instantly with a sheepish smile.

“Jongin wants to pay a visit to the guy we caught yesterday. Dad suggested that he should go with you since…well, you guys do want to go to the same place.” Sehun’s heart skipped a beat upon hearing Jongin’s name. After how their conversation ended last night, he was pretty sure that the things between them would be more than awkward.

“Please ask him to hurry up. I am already late.” No matter how convinced he was that their ride was going to be the most uncomfortable experience of his life, he still couldn’t ignore a direct order from his head Alpha.

“No need.” Jongin’s voice joined in all of a sudden, startling them. Sehun turned his head to the side, almost out of instinct, and watched on with bated breath as the other male quickly made his way towards his car before opening the door to the passenger seat and swiftly settling in.

_His scent is so strong._

That was the first thought that crossed his mind as soon as Jongin slammed the door shut.

_Oh, Selene!_

_Why are you testing me like this?_

Sehun mourned mentally when he practically felt the Wolf inside him getting excited. It was getting progressively harder to control the stupid animal whenever a certain Alpha was around.

“Sehun.”

“What?” He acknowledged grumpily before turning towards Jongin who was looking at him with a ticked brow.

“I thought you were getting late.”

“I _am_ getting late.” Sehun corrected him with a frown.

“Why aren’t you driving then?” Jongin questioned with furrowed brows.

“I am waiting for you to put on the seatbelt, Jongin.” He really wanted to make a snide remark about how the other male had created such a big fuss over him not wearing the seatbelt the last time they went to the University together, but he wasn’t petty enough to do that.

“Oh.”

“Yeah, _oh._ ” Sehun mocked with the roll of his eyes before starting the engine and pulling down the lever.

“Why are you using the car, anyway? You can just shift and reach there faster.” He inquired conversationally once they were out on the main road.

“I don’t know how you think things work for me, but I am not really fond of the idea of getting naked again and again when I am trying to go from one place to another. Plus, my suit gets all wrinkled too.” An image of a naked Jongin was not something that Sehun wanted to imagine so early in the morning.

_Stupid._

_Why did you even ask him that?_

_Don’t you have any common sense?_

“I see…” He weakly mumbled under his breath and spared a look at Jongin who was already looking at him with an amused smirk. Biting his bottom lip, Sehun quickly averted his gaze back towards the road.

_Great._

_Now, he thinks that I am the biggest idiot in this world._

“Why are you so grumpy today?” His companion implored with after a moment’s pause.

“Excuse me?”

_Did he just call me grumpy?_

“You heard me.” Sehun turned to look at the male next to him in disbelief.

“I am not grumpy.” He denied it strongly before facing the front again because an accident was the last thing they wanted.

“If you say so.” Jongin shrugged, the look on his face making it obvious that he didn’t believe his words at all.

“I am _not~_ ” Sehun asserted once again, trying to sound as intimidating as could, but only ended up sounding whiny which mortified him so much so that he wanted to hurl his body out of the moving car.

_What on Earth is wrong with you today, Oh Sehun?_

His sudden display of childish tendencies seemed to have surprised Jongin too because he turned to openly stare at him. There was nothing on his face that could give away what was going through his mind, but Sehun still has a fairly decent idea.

“What are you looking at?” He demanded, a bit petulantly when he felt his face heating up under the heavy stare.

“Nothing,” Jongin responded almost immediately before clearing his thoughts and finally looking away.

“How much longer will it take us to get there?”

_Nice change of the subject._

Sehun wanted to roll his eyes again, but in the end, decided that it was in the best of his interest if he simply let the whole matter go. He has no wish to tread along the edges.

“Ten more minutes.”

“Is Baekhyun there already?” That was a weird question considering that Jongin was never so interested in Baekhyun before, but Sehun decided to answer anyway.

“He might be. I am not sure. Why are you asking?”

“I think we should ask him to stay away from the ward that guy is kept in,” Jongin explained while pulling out his phone.

“Don’t worry. I texted him last night. He said he will be careful.” Sehun assured with a small smile before pursing his lips. He wanted to ask the other male _why_ he wanted to visit CCU, but wasn’t sure if he should, in case, he came off as too nosy.

“Not to sound nosy,” He couldn’t help himself, can he?

“But why are you going to visit that guy?”

“I want to check something.” Jongin’s answer was brief which did not satisfy him at all.

“What?”

“I want to see if he still smells the same as yesterday. If he used a scent masker, it should have worn off by now.” Sehun gave his companion a cursory glance.

“What will happen if he still smells the same?” He dreaded the answer to that question because there was a possibility niggling at the back of his mind which he didn’t want to acknowledge at any cost.

“Then our intruder isn’t as human as we think him to be and it isn’t a mere coincidence that no one was able to detect his scent other than me – the _Silver Wolf._ ”

* * *

“The locker room is empty since I am late. You can wait for me on one of the benches while I change into the scrubs.” Sehun offered while pulling open the locker with his name on it.

“Everyone here shares one locker room?” Jongin inquired, not looking pleased at all.

“Yeah,” Sehun confirmed in a distracted manner before taking out his scrubs.

“Medical school students only get one locker room since there aren’t many, to begin with. There is me, Baekhyun and another guy. It was a bit awkward at the start because Hanbin is a Beta, but now we have gotten over that stage.”

“You share this locker room with a Beta?” Somehow, that was the only information that stuck with Jongin.

“Where do you change your clothes?”

“In the washroom, of course.” Sehun turned to look at the other male with a ticked brow.

“Where else will I even-”

“Sehunnie~” An annoyingly familiar voice interrupted them.

“Why are you late today? I missed you so much.” Rolling his eyes, Sehun turned to face the newcomer.

“Hanbin.”

“You always look so pleased to see me,” Hanbin noted sarcastically before walking over to where he was standing.

“Since I am a very generous person, I will let you know that Kang is royally pissed at you. He said something along the lines of you being unfit to work here.”

“He always says that.” Sehun pointed out with a scoff.

“Is Baekhyun with him already?”

“Yup. They left a good ten minutes ago.” Hanbin supplied and lifted his arm to drape it around Sehun; who elbowed him in the stomach before stepping away. He knew that the other male meant nothing with his actions – he has a girlfriend already – and he was just friendly like that, but for some reason, being hugged by someone else in front of Jongin made him feel a bit queasy.

“Shouldn’t you be there with them?” Sehun needled with his head cocked to the side.

“I should be, but I was waiting here for you and your pretty face.” The Beta responded with the shrug of his shoulder, making Sehun’s left eye twitch in irritation.

“You know I can’t start my day without seeing it, right?”

“Don’t make me hurt you, Hanbin.”

“Okay, fine. You are so uptight all the time.” Hanbin complained with a huff.

“I don’t really understand it, but Kang asked me to hang back here until you show up. We are supposed to join him and Baekhyun together.”

_That is odd._

“He voluntarily took _Baekhyun_ with him and left you behind to do nothing even when he absolutely loathes the idea of Omegas in practice.” Sehun put forward skeptically. Something about the whole situation wasn’t sitting well with him.

“Now that you are putting it out in that _judgmental_ tone of yours, it does sound weird.” Hanbin verified with a frown, but soon his features morphed into a teasing grin.

_He can never remain serious for more than a minute._

“Perhaps, Kang secretly ships you and me.” Sehun couldn’t help himself when he whacked the dorky male on the back of his head with as much force as he could.

“I am calling your girlfriend.” He threatened with a scowl.

“You don’t even have her number.” Hanbin countered with a smug smile.

“Plus, she knows I love her too much to ever cheat on her.”

“Stop being annoying then,” Sehun grumbled with a sigh and walked past his friend’s figure.

“That is no fun- Oh, hi! I didn’t notice you here.” Hanbin broke off in the middle of his sentence when he caught sight of Jongin sitting on one of the benches. Sehun too turned around to look at the Alpha and bit the inside of his cheek when he noticed the glare that was directed at Hanbin. He didn’t want to think that Jongin was jealous – it wasn’t like the other male had any sort of feelings for him – but something about the look on his face told him that maybe it won’t be too wrong a conclusion.

_Oh boy._

Sehun panicked mentally when his mate faced him all of a sudden with those same intense eyes. The expression in his smoldering brown orbs was _so_ damn possessive that it sent a shiver down Sehun’s spine. Gulping hard, he unconsciously tightened his fingers on the clothes he was holding and like an idiot froze in his place completely.

“Don’t take him seriously.” Those words tumbled past his lips even before he could think them over.

“He jokes around like this a lot.”

_Why am I giving him an explanation?_

“Is he your _boyfriend_ , Sehunnie?” Hanbin teased with a shit-eating grin when Jongin continued to stare at Sehun instead of making a response.

“Sorry, man. I didn’t know. I was just joking and have a very lovely girlfriend. You can keep your boyfriend all to yourself.”

“Do you ever shut up, Hanbin?” Sehun demanded snappishly, his skin burning scarlet in embarrassment.

“He is not my boyfriend.”

“That is sad.” Hanbin expressed with a tsk seemingly not deterred by the glare his friend was giving him.

“You guys will look nice together.”

“Selene, why do you test my patience like this?” Sehun griped with a suffering sigh.

“Love you too, cupcake.”

“ _Do not_ call me with that disgusting name.”

“Okay, okay. Geez! Calm down.” Hanbin placated while exaggeratingly shaking his head.

“I am going ahead. Can you come on your own?”

“Yeah, but why?”

“I have a feeling that Kang is up to no good. Let me go and check-up on Baek. You can join us once you are-”

“Hanbin!” Baekhyun burst inside the room looking frazzled.

“Can you please go and keep Kang busy. I think he has finally lost it.”

“I was on my way already,” Hanbin revealed with a snort before waving a hand over his shoulder and walking out. Sehun made sure that there were no extra ears listening in to their conversation before looking at Baekhyun.

“What did Kang do?” He questioned with furrowed brows.

“He is acting weird, okay.” Baekhyun confided with a grimace.

“He is way too interested in that guy they brought in yesterday. He won’t even let me look at his file. I thought that it was for confidentiality purposes, but…you know Kang, right? That guy is not some high-profile case and Kang is never interested in cases that are not high-profile. What makes this one so special?” That was indeed true. Besides, they were part of the hospital crew which meant that they were given access to all the files – they were students so most of their work included file study – so why the hell would Kang not let Baekhyun see it?

“Is he the assigned doctor?” Jongin butted in before Sehun could say anything.

“That is the strangest part. Kang took this case almost by force if what Nurse Jung said was true.” Baekhyun provided immediately, not looking shocked to see the Alpha there at all.

“They were going to hand him over to some junior resident, but Kang swiped in before it could happen. Moreover, I don’t know why, but he was adamant on starting our rounds today with the infamous intruder. We always start our rounds with the Emergency Room. That is the protocol. It was creepy enough that he decided to take _me_ in the morning instead of Hanbin, so I was instantly alarmed. He was up to something.”

“Please tell me you didn’t go there.” Dread has already started to pool inside Sehun’s stomach.

“No. I-I kind of booked out while we were going there without him noticing,” Baekhyun assured much to his relief. He was glad that he has told his friend everything via text last night or else it could have ended up in a disaster.

“That doctor is involved.” Jongin came to the grim conclusion.

“He was definitely trying to get one of you alone with that guy.”

“I figured that much.” Baekhyun agreed.

“What was the point of taking me there anyway when he won’t even let me look at his file?”

“This is ridiculous.” Sehun suddenly burst out startling those around him.

“Do you even realize how well planned this whole thing was? Only if Jongin hadn’t accidentally walked in on that guy and noticed something was amiss with him he would have been just another criminal. We wouldn’t have batted an eye in his direction and Baekhyun, for sure, wouldn’t have run away like he did now. Instead, he would have gone along and they would have succeeded in whatever they were trying to do.”

“Sehunnie,” Baekhyun ran his hand up and down his arm in a consoling manner.

“Calm down. I am okay. We all are. There is nothing to worry about.” Sehun was about to heatedly negate it – because what the fuck was his friend talking about – but then he caught sight of Jongin and decided that he could panic later on when they were alone.

“Right.” He knew that it was no use trying to pretend to be calm and collected when his mate could simply smell his distress, but still, he tried to compose himself as much as he could.

“I think,” Jongin started before standing up in his place.

“You guys should show me to the ward that guy is kept in. We will decide what to do with Kang after that.”

* * *

“Ouch! Sehun.” Baekhyun winced when his friend suddenly latched onto his arm with a grip that was too tight.

“It hurts.”

“We won’t go any further than this.” Sehun decided while pulling his friend back without any warning. It caused the shorter male to stumble unattractively, but Sehun was too busy with his thoughts to pay him any heed.

“Why not?” Jongin inquired with squinted eyes.

_I can feel his Wolf._

Sehun didn’t know how he was supposed to say that without telling the Alpha _why_ and _how_ he could do so. He, himself, didn’t understand why. All he knew was that his Wolf was acting up. It was _anxious_ and _afraid_ ; two emotions that he has never associated with the stubborn Omega. Sehun knew that his Wolf was bold and obstinate. There wasn’t a single moment in the past five years where he had felt even an ounce of hesitation or fear stemming from the animal inside him. Something ought to be terribly wrong if the _White Wolf_ was scared.

_My Wolf is warning me._

_He doesn’t want me to go any closer._

Sehun wasn’t sure why he could feel the awful and morbid presence of that guy when they were at least two hallways away from the room he was kept in, but he has a hunch that it was connected with the oddity that Jongin (Silver Wolf) was the only one who was able to notice the vile scent on their intruder.

“I don’t want to take any risks.” It wasn’t like Sehun was lying. He, indeed, didn’t want to take any chances.

“It is safer that I and Baekhyun stay away from that room as much as possible. The way from here is pretty simple. Go straight. Take the first left and then the third right. The second door in the hallway is the one he is kept in.”

“Okay, then. I will see you guys later.” Jongin looked like he had quite a bit on his mind that he wanted to voice out, but for some reason whatsoever, he decided not to.

“Will you tell me the real reason now?” Baekhyun turned towards him with his arms crossed the second the Alpha was out of their sight.

“What is it that suddenly made you stop?”

“I can feel the presence of his Wolf, Baek. It is bloody and repulsive.” Sehun confided in a hushed, horrified tone.

“My Wolf is warning me. It is scared. I-I…I have never felt any kind of fear from my Wolf ever before in my life. Do you get how-”

“Jongin won’t let anything happen to you.” Baekhyun cut in softly before taking hold of his hand and dragging him away.

“You just need to place your trust in him.”

“Baekhyun, they will _kill-_ ”

“For Selene’s sake, Sehun!” The shorter male swore with a flaring nose. Sehun would have found him cute if he wasn’t looking so crossed at the moment.

“Stop saying that. Why are you so convinced that Jongin will die? He is _strong._ His team is strong. Our pack is strong and it will be only stronger once you guys mate. Do you really think it will be that easy to kill him? Do you think he is not tough enough to protect you? Do you think that all those years he spent in the mountains with the guys, away from his home and family, were for nothing?” Baekhyun demanded sternly before taking hold of his shoulders. It was almost as if his friend was desperately trying to knock some sense into his stubborn head.

“Do you have any idea that you are wounding his pride as your Alpha and don’t give me any petty excuses. You know it just as well as I do that Jongin knows you are his mate?” Sehun lowered his gaze to the ground in guilt.

“How can we expect him to be confident in his own skills when his own mate doesn’t trust him? _You_ are supposed to be the person he should be able to rely on. You are supposed to be his strength. There is a reason why Silver Wolf can only mate with his destined one. How will he lead this pack properly if the person who is supposed to have the utmost trust in him makes him doubt his own-self?”

“I don’t mean to do it.” Sehun defended himself weakly and looked up at his friend with eyes that besought pity.

“I am terrified, okay? I can’t even begin to imagine how things will be once my identity as the White Wolf comes out. I can’t imagine what sort of changes there will be once they all know that I am Jongin’s mate. Baekhyun, this is not easy for me. I am not ready. I am not, at all, prepared for the kind of expectations and responsibilities the elders will throw at me. I can’t _do_ it. Why don’t you all get it?”

“I do get you,” Baekhyun contradicted with a sigh before giving him a sympathetic smile.

“You are the one who needs to understand that things can’t always be about you. Hate me for saying this, but you can’t deny the fact that the future of Selene is in your hands. Your life is not only yours anymore. The decisions you make will affect thousands of lives. Besides that, the bond that you so openly speak of rejecting doesn’t only involve you. It involves Jongin too. You can’t be the only one to make such a big decision regarding it. It is _unfair._ ”

“Are you saying that I am being selfish?” Sehun couldn’t help the pain that seeped into his speech.

“I am not calling you selfish, Sehunnie~” Baekhyun clarified instantly and placed a soothing hand on his left cheek.

“I know what you are doing is for Jongin. It is for Minseok, Minyoung, and Jaehyun. I know you don’t want our pack to lose its head Alpha. I know…trust me, I do. I also know that it is a very hard time for you. I know that it is hurting you. I know you are in pain. I am not judging you for any of this, okay? I love you. We share a bond for the love of Selene, but _lord_ – I hate myself for this – I need you to see the other side too.”

“I do see the other side!” Sehun disputed with a scowl.

“Do you think I don’t?”

“Why don’t you see the consequences that will follow once you reject the bond then?” Baekhyun raised his voice slightly in frustration.

“It is not a kid’s play. Why don’t _you_ understand that the rejection of the bond is the most painful experience that a Wolf can ever go through? You have no right to do this to Jongin and I will never let you do it to yourself.”

“You don’t know how it feels to be in my place.” Sehun accused his friend bitterly.

“You don’t know how it feels to know that one day this pack and the thousands of people inside it can possibly die because of who I am. Let’s say, I accept the bond. Then what? I will have to shift into my Wolf for the claiming ceremony. Everyone will know that there is a White Wolf in the Selene pack. There will be pack wars. Those lives that you talk of would be taken away by the enemies in the most painful way possible. Where is the good in that?”

“Where is the good in you rejecting the bond?” Baekhyun shot back with a challenging raise of his brow.

“Let’s say you reject the bond and Jongin actually accepts your decision. Then what, Sehun?” His friend repeated his words before taking a step in his direction.

“I will tell you what.” He continued when Sehun failed to give him an answer.

“You and Jongin are going to suffer from an acute sense of pain, misery, and longing for the rest of your lives. You will feel empty as if a part of you is always missing. The whole pack is going to question Jongin’s worth as the head Alpha. They will doubt him, criticize him, and may even demand him to step down from his position. The Selene pack will dissolve in political tensions and mass panic. The Silver Wolf won’t have an heir. The blessing of Selene given to us will end. Our position will be weakened which will then give an opening for the enemies to attack – the enemies that have been circling our grounds like Vultures. It will lead to pack wars and people will lose their lives anyway. Now, tell me, where is the good in that.” Sehun felt himself shaking. He knew it already. Whatever Baekhyun has said was true and he has known it all along. He has also tried his best to avoid thinking about it just to create an illusion for himself. He wanted to think that there was still a choice, a better option that he could take, but there really wasn’t.

They were surrounded from all sides. It didn’t matter what he chose. They will get burned all the same.

Sensing that his words were beginning to work, Baekhyun earnestly continued.

“Jongin is stressed enough already. He is going to be the youngest head Alpha in the long history of three-hundred years that our pack has survived with honor and dignity. We have never backed down from a fight. Believe me, it is not going to happen now either regardless of whether you accept the bond or not. You are not doing any of us favors by keeping things from Jongin.”

“I don’t know what to do. I wish…I wish that I was never born.”

“Don’t say that.” His friend scolded, though there wasn’t any heat in his words, and pulled him into a hug.

“Everything will be alright. Just give it some time and try to place your trust in Jongin. If not as your mate then as the head Alpha of our pack.”

“I can’t confirm anything for him, Baekhyun. Even if I do accept the bond, it can’t be now. Once it is out, the elders would want us to mate right away and they would expect us to produce an heir as soon as possible. I-I…you know, I have never even thought about it. How will I _explain it_? T-That scar on my side…” What his friend said made sense, but Sehun still couldn’t bring himself to agree with him. No matter what others thought, his worries were within reason too.

“I can’t force you, Sehun,” Baekhyun stated before pulling away from the hug.

“The main reason being that I know you are not wrong too. Still, try to think about it, hmm? The sooner you tell everything to your mate, the better it is going to be. The enemy is close already. He knows about the White Wolf. He can’t possibly be working alone too which means that there are more out there with the information. Even if you don’t accept the bond, your identity is bound to be revealed. It is just a matter of time. The smartest option here is to be prepared for it. You don’t realize how vulnerable you are at the moment. The enemy can simply waltz in and forcefully bond with you. It won’t be as easy if you are claimed by Jongin already. You don’t even need to _mate._ That can wait until you are ready.”

_I am never going to be ready._

Sehun wanted to scream, but he decided to keep that thought to himself and nodded his head in defeat. He was exhausted already. His body didn’t possess sufficient energy for him to go on with the argument – well, not really – they were having.

“I will think about it.”

“That will mean a lot to me, Sehunnie.” Sehun wished that Baekhyun hadn’t said that because now he actually had to think it all over.

* * *

“Okay, you betrayer. How dare you not tell me that the handsome hunk in our locker room who was glaring the living daylights out of me is the future head Alpha of our pack?” Hanbin nagged when he saw Sehun and Baekhyun making their way down the hall.

“I would have told you if you have given me a chance.” Sehun excused with the shrug of his shoulders while taking the case study from Baekhyun’s hand.

“How did you find out? Baekhyun has been with me all this time.”

“I have other friends, you know.” Hanbin pointed out with a scowl before coming to walk beside them.

“Where are you headed to?”

“Dr. Lee.” Baekhyun supplied with a stifled yawn.

“He handed over this file to me yesterday. I am supposed to report to him with it. Sehun was just helping me with the possible questions.”

“Wait- you guys don’t know?” Hanbin stopped them by blocking their path. Sadly, he still didn’t manage to get the undivided attention he was hoping for.

“Know what, Hanbin?” Sehun humored his friend in a distracted manner before turning back towards Baekhyun and pointing at the dates that were written on the top corner of the page.

“Last time, Dr. Lee scolded me for not noticing the dates. You should go through them too.”

“Guys!” Hanbin exclaimed with an exasperated huff.

“Pay attention to me, will you? Dr. Lee gave us an off. The medical students – meaning us – are supposed to report to CCU after the Blue Moon now.”

“He did?” Sehun and Baekhyun simultaneously looked up from the report.

“Yes! That is how I came to know who that Alpha in the morning was. The holidays given to us are on Kim Jongin’s orders.”

“Are they now…” Sehun mumbled under his breathe musingly before making an eye-contact with Baekhyun who seemed to be having the same thoughts as him.

_Something must have happened._

“Anyway,” Hanbin continued, totally oblivious of their meaningful glances towards each other.

“What is it between you and that Alpha? He was, no doubt, ready to have my head when I was annoying you.”

“You do know that Jongin might have thought you were harassing Sehun?” Baekhyun pointed out charitably.

“Not everyone is used to your way of teasing.”

“I thought so too, at first.” Hanbin approved with a hum.

“But now that I think of it more _closely_ ,” Uh-oh! Their conversation was headed to no good place.

“There was definitely something more to it.”

“Hanbin, why are you being extra irritating today?” Sehun tried his best to act as nonchalant as he could.

“Don’t change the topic.” Hanbin immediately caught onto what he was trying to do.

“Forget about Kim Jongin. I want to talk about you. Baekhyun, I am not lying. The way he acted around Jongin in the morning was…was so not _Sehun_.”

“What is that supposed to mean?” Sehun demanded with an offended frown.

“I know you are not lying, Hanbin.” Baekhyun played along with the Beta much to his horror.

“Jongin has a tendency to make Sehun act in a certain way.”

“Will you two shut up-”

“Baekhyun. Sehun.” The three friends whirled around in their places to look at Jongin, who was standing a few steps behind them with his back against the wall.

“You two are coming home with me.”

“Uh- I will take my leave then.” Hanbin excused himself with an awkward smile before either one of them could respond.

“My girlfriend is coming to pick me up.”

“I will like to talk to her. It is about time she breaks up with you.” Sehun goaded with a playful glare.

“Tough luck in that, darling.” Hanbin refuted straightaway with a grin and pocketed his hands.

“See you guys after the Blue Moon.”

“See you, Hanbin.” Baekhyun waved at his friend’s retreating back good-naturedly before fixing his gaze on Jongin when he heard the latter scoffing.

“Is he always this annoying or today is a special day?” Jongin probed, irritation visible on his face while pushing his body off the wall. Sehun bit down on his bottom lip to keep the snicker that was threatening to escape his throat.

“We will talk about him later.” Baekhyun cast the matter aside effortlessly.

“Why don’t you explain to us what the hell is going on first?”

“Nothing is going on,” Jongin informed helpfully (not really) before sighing.

“That guy still reeks of blood, but the things is I am the only one who can smell him. I asked Dr. Lee about it as subtly as I could and he didn’t notice any such scent. That guy also didn’t drop his act of being a mentally ill patient in front of me which makes me think that he isn’t aware of the fact that I can detect his pheromones. It isn’t unlikely if we think about it. If we haven’t encountered something like him before then the odds are he has never came across a Silver Wolf too.”

“That makes sense.” Sehun couldn’t really fathom the identity of their intruder. He wasn’t a human obviously, but he wasn’t like any other normal Wolf too.

_What is he?_

“What are you planning on doing?”

“Dr. Kang is obviously involved,” Jongin confirmed what they were already speculating.

“I want to wait and see what they will do next, but for that, I have to keep the guy here for longer which is not safe for you two. I did increase the security and only the doctor appointed by me will be allowed to enter the ward, still, I don’t want to take any chances. We will move him to the prison the day after Blue Moon if all goes well. It will be a huge favor to me if till that time you and Baekhyun stay inside the packhouse around the others.”

“I think we can manage that,” Baekhyun assured before trailing his eyes towards Sehun.

“Right, Sehun?”

“Yeah, sure.” Sehun conceded with a shrug.

“I will trust Jongin on this one.”

“That is new,” Jongin commented dryly – _damn it,_ Baekhyun was right after all – before pulling out the keys that Sehun has handed over to him earlier when they arrived at the hospital. The other male has promised to send the car back to CCU with someone once he has reached the office, but as things played there was no need for that anymore.

“Let’s go home then. I hope you will enjoy your little vacation.”

_I hope so too._

* * *

I know I said that I will answer 10 Q per chapter, but let's make it 5 ^^'

**Q/A:**

  1. **What went through Jongin‘s mind when he looked up at Sehun? This was when Jongin arrived and Sehun was watching from the tower above with Baek and Minseok.**



Jongdae (with a sleazy grin): Yes, Jongin what went through your mind? If I remember it right you were checking Sehun out that day. Your thoughts must have been very interesting.

Chanyeol (turning towards his best friend with a glare): Wait! You checked my brother out?

Jongin: Do you ever shut up, Jongdae?

Minseok: Answer the question, Jongin.

Jongin: There is nothing to tell.

Baekhyun: Bullshit!

Chanyeol: You cannot just ignore me like this.

Author (ignoring Chanyeol): Tell them the truth Jongin before I open my mouth.

Jongin (flustered): I am telling! I am telling! You keep your mouth shut!

Author (smirks): I thought so too.

Jongin: Okay, well…uhh his scent was very interesting. It was kind of unique.

Baekhyun (grinning): Unique how? I think Sehun’s scent is pretty standard.

Jongin: Umm, you see it just caught my attention.

Jongdae: We got it the first time, Jongin. What was it about his scent that provoked your interest?

Jongin (shrugging his shoulders): It has a citrusy undertone.

Author (with a disapproving frown): That’s it?

Jongin: What else?

Author: I am literally inside your head.

Jongin: LEAVE ME ALONE!

Author: Since Jongin is useless and he is pissing me off. I will give you all the juicy details. Perhaps, in another bonus chapter.

Jongin: You will not dare to do any such thing.

Author: Dobby is a free elf!

  1. **So I know A/B/O dynamics are different from story to story. I was just wondering when Sehun was in heat, why didn’t Jongin get affected? Most of the time alpha ruts are triggered by their mates in this situation. I was just wondering - being that they’re destined mates and all, shouldn’t Jongin be delirious with the need to trace Sehun’s smell? I mean, he clearly knows the scent from the woods, and in this chapter it’s confirmed he knows Sehun’s human smell too.**



Okay, first of all the human and Wolf scent in my universe are the same. Sehun original scent is something sweet and citrusy mixed with hints of mint. What Jongin smelled on the White Wolf was Sehun’s distress, his emotion, (smell of burnt sugar) and as I have mentioned in the story that is something that is not usual. Only mates can smell each other’s emotions, but since both of them are new to it Jongin assumed that the smell of burnt sugar was his mate’s original scent when it is not.

Secondly, Sehun has never entered his heat cycle around Jongin. It has hardly been a month and a half since the guys returned and during this period none of the Omegas in the house have gone into heat.

I hope that the explanation helped ^^

  1. **Hehe I want to know what was going on in Jongin’s head when Sehun was drunk and sleepy (especially when he started nuzzling him and when he fell asleep in his arms)?**



Sehun (flustered): Why are we bringing this up again?

Author (waving Sehun off): Jongin, do not embarrass me more than you already have and answer.

Jongin: I was not the one who told you to do this stupid Q/A session anyway. Why are all the embarrassing questions directed towards me?

Author: Blame yourself for being so damn elusive all the time.

Jongin: As if that is my fault.

Author (grin sheepishly): Answer!

Jongin: Well, at first, I was concerned because he was all wobbly and dizzy. It didn’t cross my mind that he could be drunk and I was totally not happy when I found that out considering that his health condition at that time wasn’t the most stable. I wanted to give him a piece of my mind, but at the same time, I also knew that it would be lost on him. On the other hand, it was pretty funny too. Sehun is mostly so straight faced and in control so to see him babbling like an idiot was cute. He looked adorable-

Author (grinning like an idiot): Adorable, huh? (Nudging a blushing Sehun) He called you cute, Sehunnie.

Sehun: S-Shut up!

Baekhyun: You forgot to mention the part where Sehun nuzzled your neck.

Kyungsoo: Yeah, I almost want to know what your reaction was.

Jongdae: Spill the tea!

Chanyeol (darkly): I will be careful with my words if I were you.

Junmyeon: Oh- cut it out, Chanyeol. Don’t be a killjoy.

Jongin (annoyed): What do you want me to say? I was busy at that time, trying to make sure that Sehun wouldn’t face plant. He just slumped against me and nuzzled my neck by accident.

Author: That was not an accident.

Sehun: It was!

Author (blankly): I am literally the author and before Jongin spout anymore lies let me tell you…he liked it very much.

Jongin: I was s-shocked.

Author (undeterred): He thought that Sehun was soft and warm and he wanted to nuzzle him as well to take in his scent.

Jongin: Stop right there-

Author: Oh and his naughty Wolf was literally urging him to do the not-so-innocent things like-

Jongin (tackling the author down): Next fucking question!

  1. **For Jongin: What you thought and how you felt when you heard Sehun saying he doesn’t want a mate?**



Jongin: Honestly, I felt annoyed which confused me beyond belief. It was our first day at the University and just a day before Sehun and I have argued pretty heatedly. It was ridiculous that I felt the prick of irritation when he said that he didn’t want a mate as if it personally offended me when I, myself, wasn’t really that keen on the idea of having a mate myself. Initially, I thought it was because I thought Sehun was being ungrateful because unlike me he was getting a choice to choose, but the more I thought about it, the more it turned into something else. There was this strong urge inside me to prove him wrong and change his mind.

The other time when he said that I wasn’t so confused anymore. In fact, it kind of pissed me off and I had this strong urge to just grab him by the arm and drag him out to demand answers because it really stung. Sadly, I am way too composed for my own good and once the moment of anger passed my rational mind and reasoning caught up so ultimately I ended up doing nothing other than throwing him an indication that I knew. It wasn’t one of the smartest things I did, especially around sharp and perceptive people like Kyungsoo and Chanyeol, but the way he so openly talked about not wanting to have a mate despite knowing that we were mates it somehow felt like he was bluntly rejecting our bond. It wasn’t a pleasant feeling.

  1. **For Hawk: What made you want to help Sehun when he was attacked because Wolves killing and harming each other would be a good thing from a hunter’s POV?**



Hawk: I wasn’t really into being a hunter anymore when I stumbled across Sehun, honestly. I realized that spilling Wolf's blood wasn’t bringing me any satisfaction. Plus, I got into the profession because the Wolves have wronged me and my family. My daughter was raped by them as well. When I heard Sehun screaming for help, it was my instinct that lead me there. I didn’t stop to think whether it was a Wolf or a human. All I knew was that someone was being violated the same way my daughter was. I did hesitate for a second, but then the thought that if I just stood by and did nothing, it would make me just as bad as those people who killed my family. After seeing how shattered, broken and scared he was, I felt something inside me melting. My heart cried for that boy and I decided that I would help him. To speak the truth, I was purposeless at that time. It felt like the universe has given me a reason to live again.


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry for not updating last week  
> I got sick and it completely escaped my mind :(

Chapter #16

Despite not wanting to do it, Sehun still found himself mulling over Baekhyun’s words like he has promised earlier that day. He replayed the entire conversation in his mind and accessed his relationship with Jongin anew under the light of the advice that Baekhyun has so kindly given to him along with the snarky remark that the Alpha had made.

_‘That’s new.’_

Apparently, they were just two harmless words, but to Sehun it somehow felt like a dagger has been pierced through his heart. He didn’t mean to do it. He was ready to swear on anything dearest to him that he never had any intention to make Jongin feel bad about himself and he definitely did not want to make the other male doubt his own capabilities. It was beyond outrageous, but Baekhyun was right. He has been unknowingly doing it; knowingly even because all along he had thought that what he was doing was _right._ It was sad, but unavoidable though the more he thought things over, the more he realized that his friend has indeed told him the truth.

Even if he hadn’t done it consciously, the fact that he was revolving everything around himself _only_ when it definitely involved others – especially, Jongin – as well became evident. He wasn’t being selfish as per se, but he also wasn’t being completely selfless either. Baekhyun wasn’t wrong when he said that it was unfair to Jongin, but he also knew that his friend wasn’t exactly right when he implied that Sehun didn’t trust his mate.

Yeah, it might sound uncanny and weird, paradoxical even, but it was a reality – a sort of self-awareness – that he held no doubt about. In his own twisted and jumbled way, Sehun did trust his mate. Maybe not as much as he trusted Baekhyun and Minseok, but it was still a big deal because he wasn’t the type of person who trusted people easily. In fact, he wasn’t the type of person to trust anyone at all, well…except for the selected few people. Keeping in mind the fact that Jongin has been basically a stranger to him until just a month or so ago he was of the view that his mate should consider himself special. It was sad that he didn’t because now Sehun has to make an effort to clear things up between them even if it was just a little bit.

Which is what brought him to his present dilemma.

_Selene!_

_What am I doing?_

Sehun frowned and looked down at the two mugs, filled with piping hot tea, in his hands.

_Am I really going to do this?_

He has to. There was no way around it. Technically there was, but he refused to take the coward’s way out. What was so hard about it anyway? His plan was pretty straight forward. He just has to knock at the door of Jongin’s room and offer him one of the mugs. Hopefully, the Alpha would notice that he wanted to talk to him and would invite him inside – let’s ignore the fact that even the thought of being alone with Jongin in his room made his stomach churn in nervousness – so that they could have a word in private. It should be fairly obvious that Sehun wanted to be alone with him to talk, right? Otherwise, he would have never dared to come and knock at his door. Jongin was supposed to be smart. He was sure that the other male would easily figure everything out.

_You can do it, Sehun._

_It was hard to gather the courage so fucking do it already before you lose it completely!_

He did.

He knocked at the door and then started regretting his life choices the very next second.

_This was such a bad idea._

_What am I even planning on saying?_

Sehun could easily imagine how things were going to be.

Hint: they were going to be nothing less than painfully awkward.

He wondered if he could still leave. Maybe Jongin would think that it was one of the other guys who came knocking at his door and since it took him way too long to open, they left. It was a nice idea, except Sehun was certain that the other male would without any struggle single out his scent in the air.

_Damn-_

The door in front of him was suddenly pulled open.

Sehun was proud of himself when he suppressed the mortifying yelp that tried to escape his throat at the spectacle that startled him.

_What is it with him being half-naked all the time?_

He groused mentally before trailing his eyes up from Jongin’s sculpted and naked torso to take in his dripping hair and squinted eyes. It was rather subtle, but Sehun could still make out the surprise on the other male’s face.

Couldn’t blame him for that.

“Sehun…” Jongin acknowledged his presence with a somewhat confused countenance.

“Do you need something?”

“No!” Sehun denied with an awkward smile before wincing in embarrassment.

He was such a hopeless case.

“I mean, yes! I mean…” Jongin started to look a little concerned by that point.

“Is everything alright? Are you in trouble?”

“Everything is fine.” Sehun was quick to assure despite his chaotic mind.

“Then what?”

“I-I was wondering if you want some tea?” He made sure to raise _both_ the mugs so that his mate could get the idea that he wanted to join him too.

“Oh,” Jongin nodded his head slowly once the realization dawned on him. He spent a moment or two critically analyzing Sehun (who was slowly dying inside from the anxiety) before finally stepping aside with a sigh.

“I think you should come inside.” The other male proposed tersely while holding the door open for him. Nodding his head spasmodically – fuck why the hell was this whole thing so nerve-wracking – Sehun did as he was told and bit down on his bottom lip to stop himself from swearing when bouts of Jongin’s raw scent assaulted his senses.

_Shit._

_I did not think this through._

He breathed out a muted curse before nervously, a little bit curiously too, roaming his eyes around to take in the appearance of the bedroom. Predictably, it was extremely clean and organized – yeah, he didn’t really know his mate on a very personal level, but Jongin did seem like a person who would be extremely stingy about order and other such stuff – and despite the rustic theme that was prevalent the room’s owner’s liking for the dark colors was pretty much apparent. 

“You can place the mugs on the table.” Jongin offered from somewhere behind him and gently closed the door, obviously to give them some privacy.

Sehun knew that he was the one who wanted them to be alone, but still, he couldn’t help it when his body suddenly went rigid. An irrational sort of anxiousness climbed up his throat – he was alone in an Alpha’s room, that too at the wee hours of the night, for the first time in his whole life – which he tried his best to swallow without making it too evident. He was there to clear things up (at least somewhat) and acting like an amateur, shy Omega was not going to help him at all. In fact, he was sure that it would raise more misunderstandings between them because Jongin didn’t know just how fucking shy and inexperienced Sehun actually was.

“You have a nice room.” He complimented awkwardly instead of just standing there like a statue and bent down to place one of the mugs on the table.

“Thanks?” Jongin brought one of his hands up to ruffle his wet hair.

“Though I think you should tell that to mom since she was the one who decorated my room.”

“Oh-” Ugh! Why couldn’t he know that already? It made him seem really ignorant or maybe Sehun was being too sensitive.

“I-I will.” A painfully uncomfortable silence followed along for the next few seconds before Jongin finally broke it by clearing his throat and making a vague gesture in the direction of the bed.

“You want to sit down?” That question, for some reason, managed to make Sehun feel even more flustered as he frantically shifted his eyes between the king-sized bed and his mate before ultimately settling them down on the floor.

Nope.

He was not going to sit on that bed.

It felt way too intimate.

Besides that, Jongin would most probably sit beside him – it was his bed after all – which in turn would reduce the distance between them. Sehun didn’t know about the other male, but his own Wolf has been acting like a menace for the past few days. The stubborn animal was literally out of his control. What if things went in the wrong direction? No, he couldn’t let that happen. He was not ready to take any risks.

“I have been sitting around doing nothing ever since you dropped me and Baekhyun off in the morning. I am kind of tired of it. Don’t worry, I will stand by the…window?”

“Suit yourself.” Jongin shrugged his shoulders before picking up the mug on the table and sitting down.

_Wear a shirt, damn it!_

“You know, you don’t need to look so tense. Trust me, I am not going to eat you.” Even though his mate looked rather entertained than offended, Sehun still felt the strong need to deny it.

“I am not tense!”

“Sure~” The other male didn’t appear convinced at all.

“The look on your face says otherwise. You look just about ready to bolt out of the room.”

“I am no-”

“Will it make you feel comfortable if we keep the door open?” Snapping his mouth shut, Sehun stared at Jongin with wide eyes. It almost felt like he was caught doing something (something very wrong) that he shouldn’t have done.

“It is fine…” He mumbled weakly before walking closer to the window. The panes were pulled open which allowed the fresh breeze to enter the room; consequently (and fortunately) giving him a much-needed reprieve from the Alpha’s dizzying scent.

“I wanted to talk to you and having company won’t be of any help.”

“Is it about what happened today?” Jongin implored while softly blowing on the tea to cool it down a bit. 

“No.” Sehun denied almost right away before a frown graced his features.

“Not _exactly_ , at least…I mean, it did happen today, but believe me it is not what you think it is- can you like put on a shirt?” He has been trying his best not to let his eyes stray, but it was a lot more difficult than he initially thought it would be.

His mate merely ticked a brow at him before he leaned back on one of his arms.

“Ah- I forgot you have a special kind of allergy towards nudity.” The other male teased with a crooked smirk and reached behind himself to take hold of the shirt that was laid out on the sheets.

Sehun ignored the jab with a burning face and pointedly stared out the window while his mate went through the _tedious_ (note his sarcasm, please) task of covering his upper half.

“How is your injury now?” He found himself inquiring once he was sure that Jongin was in a decent enough state.

“It is healed mostly.” For once, the Alpha didn’t throw the ever dreaded ‘why do you care’ question at him and answered properly.

“At most, it will take a few more days for the scar to completely disappear.”

“That is nice to hear.” Sehun wished he could, by some miracle, make his own scar disappear too.

“Sehun.”

“Hmm?”

“Your tea is getting cold.”

“I-I am drinking it.” His vain and stuttered response only seemed to have amused Jongin.

“If you say so.” The other male taunted while emphatically staring at his full mug as if he was wordlessly trying to call him out on his lie. Letting loose a huff of annoyance, Sehun petulantly brought the mug up and purposely (grossly even) sipped away at his tea noisily to make some kind of a point that he, himself, wasn’t aware of. The sheer futility of his actions hit him a second too late and filled his being with embarrassment so strong that he wanted the ground to open up and swallow him alive.

_Why do you always make a fool out of yourself, Oh Sehun?_

He derided himself mentally when the heat started to climb up his neck. Thankfully though, Jongin didn’t feel the need to make a comment on his childish tendencies (he really would have died from mortification if he had) and instead brought his mug up to his lips. They continued to consume their respective drinks for the next few minutes in a peaceful silence – which wasn’t so peaceful for Sehun because he knew that he couldn’t stall forever and eventually he had to open up to Jongin about what he has actually wanted to discuss – before Sehun, at last, decided to look away from the window and face his mate who has been kind enough to be patient with him. Really, he was sure that he would have chickened out of it at some point if Jongin had pushed him to speak up.

“Well?” The other male urged when their eyes met.

“You know,” Sehun began hesitantly and fiddled with the mug in his hands. It should be easy for him. He has thought over what he was supposed to say the whole day, but for some reason, now that he has to speak to make a difference his mind was suddenly a blank slate. He was literally the embodiment of the phrase, ‘No thoughts. Head empty.’ 

“I am kind of fucked up.” It was quite evident that Jongin wasn’t expecting to hear that from him. It would explain why his features contorted in confusion before they slowly morphed into an expression of open disapproval.

“No, I don’t.” He denied and placed down the mug on the table.

“You should.” Sehun contradicted weakly.

“I mean, I have heard that you are extremely observant. It shouldn’t be hard to notice.”

“I didn’t notice because it is not the truth.” Jongin clarified before crossing his arms.

“You are not fucked up.” Sehun shook his head with a breathy chuckle; genuinely finding the notion funny.

“I am.”

“Sehun-”

“Don’t get me wrong. I am not ashamed of it.” He interrupted his mate while restlessly tapping his fingers against the ceramic.

“Circumstances made me into what I am today. It is not my fault. Well, not entirely at least.”

“I don’t get where we are going with this conversation.” His companion expressed with a frown after a moment of thoughtful pause. It didn’t look like he necessarily agreed with Sehun’s words, but that was something that he could address later on. Right now, they have more important matters to reflect upon.

“Earlier today…you implied that I don’t trust you.”

“Was I wrong?” Jongin tipped his head to the side with a challenging gleam in his eyes.

“Yes! I-I do trust you.” Gosh! Why was it so hard to communicate his true feelings?

“I know it is hard to believe, but I really do. It’s just that I am so _me._ It may not seem like it, but in my own twisted ways, I do trust you. I never, not even for a second, doubted your words when you told me the other night that you will not let that guy harm me-”

“But?”

“Huh?”

“There is a ‘but’ coming,” Jongin observed listlessly while intently taking in his anxious features.

Sehun bit his bottom lip.

“Look, I am sorry, okay?” He expanded further in a barely audible voice. His already meek confidence was dwindling with each passing second.

“I never meant to make you feel bad or anything of the sort. I feel genuinely sad if I did because it was never my intention. I never wanted to hurt anyone.” That was the whole problem. He didn’t want people to get involved in the mess that was his life because he knew once they did, getting hurt was inevitable. Call him selfish, but he simply was not ready to carry that burden on his shoulders yet.

“Y-You just have to be patient with me.”

_Give me some time._

“I know, Sehun.” Jongin divulged with a small smile, his eyes appearing strangely bright before he got up from his place.

“You don’t need to apologize to me for anything.” That was something Sehun found hard to believe. He has seen the disappointment on the other male’s face a night prior. He was sure that he has not just imagined the slightly bitter undertone to his voice when Jongin has so casually said, _‘that’s new.’_ Maybe his mate was trying to be thoughtful, maybe the negative emotions that he has caught on to were just momentary or maybe the other male himself wasn’t aware of the things that were bothering Sehun to no end, but that didn’t change the fact that it was wrong.

Jongin owed him nothing and he was definitely not _okay_ with whatever Sehun was playing on.

“You are not being honest right now, Jongin. Not with me and not with yourself.”

“I am not the type of person who lies to himself.” Jongin corrected right away before taking slow and steady steps in his direction. It was almost impossible, but Sehun felt like those narrowed eyes had him pinned in his place.

“I know you meant no harm and I told you not to apologize because I understand. That, however, sadly doesn’t control what I feel sometimes and that also doesn’t mean I am okay with it. Understanding your intentions is totally different from whether I think what you are doing is right or wrong.” Their conversation was precariously treading along the edge of the territory that he refused to enter, especially with Jongin.

“I-I…” Crap! Where were his words?

“You think you are the only one?” The other male continued, in a dangerously low voice which sent shivers down his spine while taking another step in his direction which consequently reduced the sphere of Sehun’s personal space.

_Oh, Lord!_

_What is he doing?_

“I don’t!” It was humiliating how shaky his voice actually sounded as he nervously walked backward.

“I have concerns too, Sehun. This is a two way road. As much as you want it to be, it is not just about you. It is equally about me as well and trust me, you will be surprised to know how much of your opinions I share.” Sehun stumbled back with a startled gasp when Jongin reduced the distance between them all together and couldn’t stop himself from swallowing when his back hit the window pane.

_Fuck._

He was trapped.

Quite literally because Jongin didn’t waste even a single second before he placed both his hands against the wooden pane on either side of his head, conveniently caging him.

“Jongin…” Sehun choked out, feeling like his heart would explode out of his chest any moment, and tried his best to keep his face from combusting in flames when his mate leaned down to be at the same eye level as him.

“The only difference is that I realize what my duty towards the pack is more than you do.” Jongin’s stare on his face quite literally burned.

“It is okay, you know. You have every right to think about yourself…at least for as long as you are given the privilege by the elders. I _wish_ I can do it your way too, but when it comes to me the oh-so-great sentiment of ‘pack first’ always takes priority. They have been drilling it inside my head ever since I was thirteen. _This_ is why I empathize with you, Sehun. I know how it feels to be lost and confused under the pressure that only continues to pile up. I know what that impending feeling of doom is like. I know how it feels to know that once the water goes over your head there is no going back. Nothing will ever remain the same.” He has no idea what he was supposed to say. When he decided to come to talk to Jongin earlier he was not expecting their talk to take such a turn. He had never even thought of the possibility of the other male opening up to him about his struggles. Plus, it was kind of nerve-wracking how they were talking about their bond as mates, but neither of them was directly mentioning it. The dance, the tiptoeing, that they were partaking in was giving him avid anxiety. Moreover, their close proximity was making it impossible for Sehun to think straight. It would explain why he only ended up gaping at his companion like a fish out of water despite the fervent urge to console the other.

“We all have our own reasons. I have mine which is why I am not going to judge you for yours, but I hope you will be able to make a decision soon because as much as I want to be considerate, I also have responsibilities that I cannot ignore. I am already risking a lot by keeping everything from the elders. You have no idea how much trouble we can be in if they find out.” Sehun did have an idea and he was immensely grateful towards Jongin for keeping him safe from the wrath of the elders...so far.

“O-Okay.” A brief pause, filled with stifling silence, fell upon the sphere around them before Jongin heaved out a tired sigh and moved away from him to lean against the opposite side of the window. It took Sehun about a whole minute to gather his wits, his fingers tightening significantly around the mug before he cleared his throat.

“I will leave then.” He received no response from his mate. The other male didn’t even bother to look his way and continued to stare out. Biting the inside of his cheek, Sehun picked up Jongin’s empty mug and reluctantly – it somehow felt like he has made the matters worse, instead of clearing out the misunderstandings – made his way towards the door. It was only then when he was about to step out, did the Alpha stopped him.

“Sehun.”

“What?”

“I am not trying to pressurize you, but if you can’t make things easier for me then at least try and not make them harder.” Sehun found himself going breathless when his eyes met Jongin’s again.

“ _Please_ , stay safe.”

_Why the fuck did my heart just flutter?_

* * *

Not knowing what to do, the first thing that Sehun did in practice was to go to Baekhyun’s room – Minseok was unsurprisingly there as well – and relate everything (except for, of course, a few details like just how close he has been with his mate just a few minutes ago) that went down between him and Jongin to his friends. Minseok didn’t look too impressed by it, but Baekhyun did send a thankful smile his way. Sehun knew in that moment that whatever the outcome was, he has kept the promise that he has made earlier; at least, somewhat. Baekhyun has also consoled him by saying that no matter what Jongin said to him, he was sure that the Alpha was now feeling a lot better about whatever it was between them than he was before. Besides that, his friend has claimed that communication was the key. It didn’t matter if he made the matters worse; important was the fact that they have started talking.

Sehun wasn’t exactly too taken by the idea, but he still let it soothe his frazzled nerves.

Baekhyun was right.

He has tried.

That should amount up to something considering just how difficult it was for him to trust people and open up in front of them. Putting everything aside, he was feeling rather proud of himself. Others might not think the same way, but Sehun thought that he has taken a huge step…hopefully towards improvement.

Their conversation from there has, for some reason, led to the reminiscing of a trip they went to when they were in the senior year of their high school – before all the White Wolf fiasco started – and that has somehow encouraged Baekhyun to pull out the photo albums that he has kept. It was fun to talk about and remember all the fun times after such a long period. Sehun almost didn’t recognize his pink-haired self in the pictures. Truthfully, it wasn’t only the hair, he also couldn’t bring himself to relate to the brightly smiling boy who looked so youthful and happy, as if he had no care in the world. Sehun couldn’t believe that it was him. It almost felt like he was looking at a stranger.

It made him wonder.

What was the exact point where he has lost the Sehun in the picture? What was the exact thing that made him the mess he was that day? Did that one night change him so much? How come he was so weak? How come he allowed just one experience to shape his all life? Why couldn’t he simply forget and move on with his life? Why couldn’t he smile that way anymore? Why couldn’t he look that carefree and happy anymore?

He didn’t have an answer to any of those questions, but he did know one thing. He wanted to be the Sehun that he used to be once more. He wanted to feel alive again. He wanted to live. He wanted to breathe freely.

Was it too much to ask?

Was it even possible?

There was only one way to know.

* * *

“Holy shit! Minseok did Sehun really dye his hair _pink_ or am I hallucinating? Someone fucking pinch me?”

Okay, so maybe dyeing his hair was not really the brightest way to start his journey towards the _‘old Sehun’_ , but what’s done was done and it was at least a start. Till barely a minute ago, Sehun had been pretty convinced of the conception that he would become the part if he looked like it, but now he held a reasonable amount of doubts. Baekhyun’s over the top reaction wasn’t helping him in feeling better either. He would have ignored it because his loud-mouthed friend has always been a bit of an exaggerator, but Baekhyun wasn’t the only one giving him a reaction at that moment. Nope. Almost everyone in the launch was looking at him as if he has grown an extra head.

“Umm…Sehun?” Even Jaehyun looked like he was at a loss for words.

“I just felt like doing it,” Sehun explained himself gawkily as embarrassment started to slowly color his face. That was not the response he was expecting though in hindsight he should have.

“You _felt_ like doing it?” Minyoung repeated while dumbly blinking her eyes.

“Why are you all looking so surprised?” Sehun protested with a frown and self-consciously brought a hand up to smooth his hair down.

“Is it looking that bad?” It shouldn’t because the color had looked pretty nice on him in the pictures that they have gone through last night.

“No!” Minyoung denied immediately before a bright grin took over her lips. It seemed like she was finally over her shock.

“Not, at all. This is good. This is great. You look so pretty.” She continued to gush and bounced over in his direction, practically vibrating in excitement.

“It is…it is just that you- I mean, you normally don’t do this sort of stuff, right? You used to but then you stopped and it made me so sad because you always looked so pretty in new colors and you used to ask me to choose the next color…gosh!” She broke off with a sniff and cupped his face with trembling fingers. Sehun stared at her stunned. He never knew that bleaching his hair again would make her so sentimental and happy.

“It reminds me of the old days so much, Sehunnie. When everything was alright. When the three of you used to-” Minyoung broke off with an embarrassed laugh.

“I am over-reacting, no? You can’t really blame me. When was the last time you dyed your hair? Was it in high school? I think you were sixteen or maybe seventeen. Wasn’t it for that one trip? I think you guys went to the beach. I remember Baekhyun dyed his hair red and Minseok went with purple. They sulked so hard when I said that you looked the dearest.”

“Mom!” Minseok called out with a chuckle.

“Slow down.” He continued and wrapped his arms around Minyoung’s shoulders to calm her down. However, Sehun didn’t miss the unshed tears shining in his eyes. Baekhyun and Jaehyun appeared a bit emotional too which genuinely confused him.

_I just dyed my hair._

He would have done it sooner if he knew that it would make the people around him so elated.

_Am I missing something?_

Come to think of it, _why_ did he stop dyeing his hair?

Minyoung was right. He used to change his hair color at least once every two months. He used to love experimenting with different shades and looks. He used to love playing with his appearance because – sue him – he knew he was pretty. He used to drag Baekhyun and Minseok into it as well (sometimes even against their wishes) because they were no doubt as pretty as him if not more. It simply used to be his way of having fun.

What happened then?

Why did he stop?

Was it normal that Sehun has completely forgotten about it and was reminded of it again only when he has seen the pictures last night? Was that the reason why he felt something stir inside him? Was that why he was so impulsive in his need to just become that person in the picture – that stranger – who was supposed to be him, but was so, _so,_ different that Sehun couldn’t help, but think that it was someone else.

It was not him.

_No…_

_That is me._

The realization, although abrupt, was also the biggest truth of his life. The real Sehun was the one who was eternalized in those pictures and memories. The person he was today was merely a dead, bland shadow of who he actually used to be.

When did he lose all the colors in his life?

When did he forget how to have fun?

_That night._

It was that black night. The one that stained him with its dark, lifeless and murky ink in such a way that Sehun became blind towards the other hues after that. He remembered wanting to dye his hair the same as his Wolf’s fur once he has shifted. He remembered now how he started hating colors after he found out that he was the White Wolf. Wasn’t it just a month or so ago when he was fuming at Baekhyun for making him wear a pink shirt? How come he dyed his hair pink _willingly_ then?

_Why?_

Why didn’t he think of going back to his old ways before?

Why only now?

_I am changing._

His way of thinking was changing. It has changed once before, about five years ago, but he has been too oblivious – too caught up in his head – to notice it back then. He hadn’t been aware of how he has killed the happy and hopeful child inside him.

He did notice it now.

_I am moving on._

Was this how it was supposed to feel?

_I want to live again._

Why the hell did it feel so liberating?

_Oh, lord!_

_My heart is racing._

For the first time in forever, it was racing because he was excited.

_It is exhilarating._

What provoked such a change in him anyway?

_Jong-_

_No!_

That was something Sehun was still not ready to come on terms with because it simply made no sense to him.

“You really did take me back in the past, kiddo.” Jaehyun’s gentle voice broke him out of his reverie before his pink locks were fondly ruffled.

“I can’t believe you look the same as you did all those years ago. Did you even grow up?”

_I didn’t._

That was the problem.

He didn’t grow at all. All this time he was stuck in the past. He was stuck in that night. He still was, but maybe it could change at long last.

“Sehunnie~” Minji chimed in with her eyes sparkling in awe.

“I have said this before, but you are one of the prettiest Omegas I have ever seen.” Sehun went red in the face almost immediately and it only continued to burn brighter when Chanyeol joined in too with a scoff.

“Do you think I was lying when I told you that he had thirsty girls and boys coming after him even when he was a _kid_?”

“Shut it, Chanyeol,” Sehun grumbled under his breath. He was not about to let his brother start another tirade about how he wanted to break the fingers of the guys who dared touch his little brother when they were kids.

“They were kids just like you and me. Kids are not thirsty for the love of Selene!”

“This color looks nice on you, Sehun.” Yixing complimented him before Chanyeol could object to what he has said.

“Yeah, the bubblegum pink really suits you.” Junmyeon agreed with his mate while giving him a thumb’s up. Shaking his head, Sehun shot them a small, thankful smile before his eyes unconsciously trailed towards the only person – Jongdae and Kyungsoo were out – present in the launch who hasn’t said anything.

Jongin was unabashedly staring at him and he even had the audacity to give his whole figure a once over once their eyes met, but other than that he didn’t bother himself with words which strangely disappointed Sehun.

_What the hell Oh Sehun?_

_Why were you expecting a compliment from him?_

_So what he said nothing?_

_It shouldn’t bother you._

It did bother him though.

After all, it wouldn’t have killed his mate to say that he was looking nice…or at the very least decent.

* * *

“Are you sulking?” Sehun, who was pouring himself a glass of water from the jug, jumped in his place upon the sudden address and turned to look at Jongin. The other male was casually leaning against the counter at the entrance of the Kitchen with his arms crossed over his chest.

Frowning to himself, Sehun turned back to the task at hand.

“What makes you think that?”

“Nothing. I just got a feeling.” Jongin supplied with the shrug of his shoulders, his eyes glinting with hidden amusement as they brazenly roved over his features, which made Sehun roll his eyes.

“Well, your feeling is very wrong.”

“You are pouting.” His mate confided in a mock-grave manner before an entertained smirk graced his lips.

“Thanks for pointing that out,” Sehun grumbled with an irritated scowl and placed the jug back in its place.

“Did you follow me to the Kitchen to say that?” He inquired with a raised brow and scoffed under his breath when the other male shrugged his shoulders once again.

“Whatever.” It wasn’t like he was dying for a single compliment from Jongin or something. He didn’t need it anyway. Everyone else told him he looked great. He knew he did. There was no need to look for more validation. Shaking his head, Sehun threw his mate another one of his infamous glares and decided to leave the place lest he ended up blurting something embarrassing.

Sadly, Jongin didn’t seem to be agreeing with him at that because he took hold of his arm just in time Sehun was about to walk past him. A yelp fell from his lips when the Alpha pulled him back and without an ounce of hesitation or shame invaded his personal bubble. Sehun tried to jolt back in his place, more out of surprise than anything else, when the water in the glass sloshed and wet the front of his shirt – they were way too close for his comfort – but Jongin’s hand only tightened around him.

“W-What…” Sehun’s words died in the throat the moment his mate confidently bridged the distance between their faces. His eyes slowly rounded in panic as a hot flush traveled up his cheeks and settled there with every intention of giving away his bashfulness.

“You look cute,” Jongin whispered into his left ear and brought his free hand up to brush away the stray, pink strands that were loosely falling onto his forehead. Sehun let his eyes flutter close when he felt the seemingly innocent touch against his heated skin and bit down on his bottom lip when it felt like his wildly beating heart would literally jump out of his chest.

“So stop sulking now.” His mate went on as callous fingers continued to caress the skin of his forehead even though there was no more hair to tuck away. Sehun didn’t dare open his eyes. He could feel the burn of Jongin intense stare on his face and wasn’t sure if he would be able to handle it from such close proximity.

“Jongin!” Chanyeol’s booming voice from the launch broke the spell that previously had them enraptured.

“Your phone is ringing.” It took Sehun a second – a second too long in his opinion – to make sense of those words and to realize what the hell was going on before he hastily wrenched himself out of his mate’s hold.

_What on Earth is wrong with you, Sehun?_

He scolded himself fervently – not believing that he has given into the temptation of being touched – when instead of making a response, Jongin continued to wordlessly stare at his flaming face.

“So you’re the shy type?” He concluded after a moment making Sehun snap his head up.

“I a-am not!” Jongin shot him a mocking grin.

“I can hear your heart racing.”

_Oh, Selene!_

_Can this ground open up and swallow me whole?_

“You need to get your ears checked.” Sehun shot back lamely, choking the poor glass in his hand, and nervously took a step back when it looked like his mate would attempt to walk closer again.

Jongin only tipped his head to the side with a teasing smile.

“Are you sure about that, Sehun?”

“Y-Yes!” Sehun stumbled over his words. Out of all the times, he could have lost his ability to speak, his speech decided to abandon him in that moment of dire need. Actually, come to think of it, lately, it has been abandoning him all the time.

“You know, your scent changed just now.” His mate divulged casually while once again diminishing the decent space between them.

“Huh…?”

“It smells like roses.” Jongin continued before looking at him straight in the eye. Sehun’s heart skipped a beat without any prompting.

“I wonder why that might be.”

“It didn’t…it didn’t change!” Sehun denied in a flabbergasted manner before clumsily shoving the glass in Jongin’s chest. It was a nice thing that his mate caught onto it on time, despite being surprised, or else it would have shattered on the floor and alerted everyone in the launch.

“Why are you even talking to me? Don’t talk to me.” He continued childishly before practically running out of the Kitchen.

_What the hell is wrong with him?_

He carped mentally while rubbing his cheeks to calm his face down.

_Why do I always act like an idiot around him?_

It was so damn embarrassing. Sehun couldn’t believe that his stupid heart has betrayed him like that.

_Why do you need to beat so fast anyway?_

_Fuck!_

_Why the hell am I smiling?_

He did get his compliment in the end.

* * *

A little bit fluff everyone?

I hope you enjoyed the chapter.

Please comment I really want to know what you guys think of the chapters...pretty please with a cherry on top ^^'

Kudos are appreciated.

Thank you!


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, before you read further...I just want to tell you guys that my final exams start from 13th Jan onwards and I have my theses due in March. This will be my last update on this story before I once again go on a hiatus - it will most probably last 2 months and I will update next on 19th Feb - so please be patient and wait for me. I am always grateful for the support so hopefully, you guys will stick by my side while I am going through these few insanely busy months ^^  
> Anyhow, I am planning on taking a gap year after I graduate from Uni and take up a job - nothing is set in stone tho - so hopefully once I am done with this and the next sem there will be no more hiatus <3  
> Thanks a lot for reading.

Chapter #17

It was late in the evening when Kyungsoo and Jongdae had returned to the packhouse from the University. To everyone’s surprise, they were accompanied by someone (a male Alpha) who was relatively a stranger to almost everyone in the house; well, of course, other than the two guys who actually brought him over. It turned out that they have a group project due soon – the project which Jongin, being the stuck-up overachiever he was, has already gotten out of the way – and keeping in mind the fact that the next few days leading up to the Blue Moon were going to be extremely busy for the group leaders they have decided to be done with it on time. That sadly had forced them to ask their third group member to cooperate – technically they have asked him for a favor which seemed to be not sitting too well with them because none of the two appeared particularly comfortable or thrilled about bringing the guy over – and hadn’t really been able to deny it when their partner had suggested that they can do it over at their place.

For most of the part, they had stayed in Kyungsoo’s room. Sehun knows that because Minyoung had sent Minseok to deliver the snacks to the guest while they were playing cards in the patio. Initially, it had only been him, Baekhyun, Minseok, and Minji though soon they were joined by Chanyeol and Yixing as well. It was a fun game – Sehun didn’t remember when was the last time he was so relaxed – which was why it hadn’t been a surprise when Jongin and Junmyeon had decided to abandon whatever file they were working on in favor of playing with them as well.

All had been well till there, but then Minseok came back with the tray of snacks and delivered the news that apparently their guest was tired of studying and he wanted to unwind a bit with everyone – looked like the small banters and laughter that went along with their game were loud enough to be heard in Kyungsoo’s room – before continuing working on the project. Before Minseok could go any further with his explanation Kyungsoo, Jongdae, and Dongmin (as he has introduced himself) had descended the stairs, promptly preventing all of them from speaking whatever it was that they thought about it.

One thing was for sure though, Sehun wasn’t the only one who was ill at ease with that request. He just didn’t get the point of it and felt like the guy was nothing, but trouble; the notion that was proven right merely within the first fifteen minutes of their very stroppy evening with an uninvited and unwelcome guest.

“What the _hell_ is wrong with you?” All heads snapped towards Sehun in shock as soon as he gritted that question out while positively fuming in anger.

“Sehun…?” Kyungsoo called out hesitantly and threw a cursory glance towards Dongmin who was blinking his eyes in shock. If he looked closely he could make out the subtle flush of embarrassment on his face too.

“What do you look so surprised for?” Sehun scoffed at the stupid Alpha while completely ignoring Kyungsoo.

“Didn’t expect me to speak up?”

“What happened?” Chanyeol implored with a frown. His eyes already glaring holes through Dongmin’s head. He wasn’t the only one though. Everyone present there knew that Sehun wasn’t one to create a scene over nothing. That guy must have really done something.

“He keeps on touching me that’s what happened. I have been ignoring him for the past five minutes, but that seemed to have only encouraged him since he thought that it was okay to hold my waist.” Sehun raged with an indignant glower. That bastard dared touch him without his permission. He dared press his fingers against his scar; never mind the fact that not a lot of people were aware of its presence. He shouldn’t have touched him. Period.

“Oh, come on! It was just a friendly gesture.” Dongmin finally defended himself and got up from his place.

“Why are you making such a big deal about it?”

“It is fucking harassment, you _asshole_.” Sehun hissed feeling anger slowly manifesting inside his body.

“So the rumors about you are right.” Dongmin didn’t seem fazed even with all the glaring pair of eyes on him.

“Excuse me?”

“The people in the University say that you are way too _spirited_.” He spat out the last word in a condescending manner. No doubt, his useless and inflated Alpha pride has been injured.

“You are always playing hard to get, putting on airs and stuff. Just because you were blessed with a pretty face and a body everyone wants to have a taste of. Acting like you don’t want it…as if we all don’t know what you were made to do.” A punch flew towards Dongmin’s face the second those words left his lips. Sehun was too numb to make out the fact that suddenly there was Jongin’s seething form between him and the disgusting moron. He couldn’t focus on it. He couldn’t focus on anything over the dreadful memories that were taking over his senses.

_  
“Oh, come on, Omega~” The disgusting man had cooed while greedily eyeing his body that he was trying so hard to cover._

No…

Lord, no!

He didn’t want to think about it at that moment.

_“You know you want it. That’s what you are made for anyway. You want me to tear you open, don’t you? You are leaking for it. Why are you playing so hard to get?”_

Despite all his efforts to push those thoughts away, tears started to sting his eyes.

Why did it have to happen now?

Why when he was having such a nice day?

Why when he was moving on, at last?

_“I haven’t noticed how pretty you were.” The other Wolf whispered right against his lips and brought a hand up to caress the side of Sehun’s face; who recoiled almost instantly as if the touch was acid against his skin – it was._

Sehun fisted his hands against his pants’ legs when his ears started to ring.

_“It is a sin not to use you. That pristine white neck was made to be marked.”_

It was getting progressively harder to breathe. Blinding rage was climbing up his throat. All he could see at that moment was red. He couldn’t think straight.

_“I will fucking mate with you in my Wolf form. I will fucking ruin that hole of yours. I will ruin your tight, perfect little body for everyone out there.” He had shifted into his Wolf – an imposing and petrifying brown beast – right above him. Sehun had gone stiff as a cold hand of terror wrapped around his throat and choked him._

“Sehun!” Baekhyun's panicked voice brought him back to his senses – somewhat.

“Let go! This is not _him._ ” His friend urged while tugging at his hand for some reason. Swallowing heavily, Sehun did what he was asked to do and let his tight grip around Dongmin’s arm – that he has twisted quite badly in his stupor of fury – fall loose. It was only then when the pathetic excuse of an Alpha scurried away from him in fear did he notice the fact that he has indeed broken a bone.

_Good._

_He fucking deserves it._

His body was literally vibrating with suppressed wrath. It was an experience that he was all too familiar with. It was something that he has gone through before. He knew what it meant – the White Wolf wanted an out.

Unprecedented fear clouded his conscious mind. Just like that night his Wolf was on the defensive and wanted revenge. It was thirsty for blood. It wanted to kill. It was a good thing that Kyungsoo has already dragged Dongmin out of there.

_Please, calm down._

Sehun begged the animal inside him and dug his blunt nails in his palms to calm himself down.

_Please!_

He repeated desperately when the urge to shift made every single pore of his body ache. He knew that nothing would work now. It was all useless.

“Geez! Sehun, remind me not to ever piss you off.” Jongdae nervously tried to lift up the mood; totally oblivious of the torment that the said male was going through. Biting his bottom lip, Sehun tried his best to will his eyes away from the door that Dongmin has used to escape the packhouse, but he couldn’t. He wanted to look at Jongdae, make a joke too, but his Wolf was literally tearing him apart from inside. It wanted to come out. It wanted to spill blood.

_I can’t let you._

A gasp full of agony left his lips as a wave of crippling pain went through his body. Sehun bent down at his waist, trying to elevate the stinging throb in his joints, which ultimately caused him to lose his balance and stumble back. He was sure that he would have kissed the floor amidst the chaotic cadence of shocked, alarmed, and horrified shouts if it was not for Jongin who caught him by the waist at the last moment and carefully lowered their bodies so that they were sitting.

“Sehun…” Although he was certain that it was one of them, it was hard to tell whether it was Minyoung, Baekhyun, or Minseok who sounded close to tears.

Acidic bile that left an odd metallic taste in his mouth climbed up his throat.

“Move aside! Let me see him.” That must be Yixing.

_He is my doctor after all._

Sehun felt almost drunk on pain when he finally lost control over his reflexes and puked out whatever it was that he was trying so hard to hold back.

_Blood._

A lot of it.

That was all he saw before a curtain of black was draped over his consciousness.

* * *

  
The first time Sehun got hold of his senses again, his body felt stiff and heavy as if someone has filled it with lead. Every pore of his being was aching and every nerve in his body was burning. He felt sore from the top of his head to the tip of his toe. His brain was fuzzy and muddled – it almost felt like a fever dream – which made it hard to formulate even a single thought.

He couldn’t move.

He couldn’t speak.

He couldn’t see.

He couldn’t smell.

What he could do, however, was hear. It was another thing that it felt like the person speaking was standing miles away. There was nothing that he could do to confirm whether what he was feeling was just the trick of his exhausted mind or whether it was the reality since he couldn’t even blink his eyes open.

“I am so sorry, Sehunnie.” A thick, muffled voice apologized to him before the bed beside him shifted.

“I swear, I and Kyungsoo wouldn’t have brought that guy over if we knew what his ulterior motives were. I mean, we did feel like it was odd and we were not comfortable, but…it was just supposed to be a project.”

_Jongdae._

Sehun cluttered brain provided a few seconds too late.

He wanted to open his eyes and tell the other male that it was not his fault. He shouldn’t be apologizing. How could he even think that whatever was happening to Sehun was his fault? Why was he even crying?

Despite all the numbness that was spreading over his body, Sehun felt his heart clenching painfully.

“I didn’t know you were _this_ sick.” Jongdae started again after staying silent for a minute or two – it was almost as if he was lost in his own thoughts – before lightly tapping his fingers against Sehun’s hand. It wasn’t hard to notice the fact that he was being hesitant as if he wasn’t sure whether his touch would be appreciated or _allowed_ even.

Sehun’s heart clenched again.

“We used to be so close before I left. I used to know everything about you. _You_ used to always tell me whatever it was going on in your life. I was your go to person, wasn’t I? Do you even remember it anymore?” He did remember it. After all, when Chanyeol decided that Sehun was no longer worth any of his effort, it was Jongdae who picked him up and gave him hope. He was the one who used to spend time with him. He was the one who protected him and he was the one who made him smile.

It wasn’t something that happened suddenly. With how protective Chanyeol was over him, Sehun used to hang out with him and his friends mostly. Jongdae was one of them.

He was there.

Always.

Even before Minseok and Baekhyun.

Sehun used to play with them, no doubt, but the three of them only got closer after the guys left. Jongdae, on the other hand, with his mischievous eyes, teasing smile, loud laugh, and obnoxious personality was there from the start. He was the only one whose I-am-a-big-boy-now pride didn’t get hurt when he used to play _childish_ games with him, Baekhyun and Minseok.

“I think you don’t.” Jongdae continued weakly.

“You don’t remember it or else…or else it wouldn’t have felt like I am talking to a stranger once we returned. For a moment back there, I was so jealous of Minseok and Baekhyun because the friendship that you share with them now was something that we used to have.” He broke off with an unattractive groan before mumbling something under his breath.

Sehun knew that he was about to start complaining.

“Yah! Shouldn’t you have welcomed me with a hug or at the very least a smile? You didn’t even apologize; such a brat! I was so hurt. Here, I was so excited to see you after all these years and you didn’t even spare me a glance. I was already so pissed at you for completely abandoning our friendship. So what Chanyeol was being an ass? _I_ wanted you to come and visit. Shouldn’t that have mattered to you? I was your best friend. Look at the irony, I wouldn’t even have known how you looked like if it wasn’t for Baekhyun and Minseok who showed me your pictures.” There was a brief pause.

Sehun had an odd feeling that he was being glared at.

“All of us wanted you to come there even if it was just for once! I wanted to show you around. The mountains might have been cold, but that place is so beautiful, Sehun. I was so sure that you would have loved it. I went out of my way to search for spots for you, but what did you do? Forget about coming there physically, you even stopped calling me. I tried to understand you…I knew that it was hard for you when you didn’t shift, but did you really have to make it so permanent? I gave you the needed space. You know I did. Then why did it seem like I was forcing you when I tried to talk to you over the phone after that. Why did you stop talking to me altogether? Why did I lose you completely?” Jongdae’s voice grew quieter towards the end which only made Sehun feel like an actual ass. He had realized it the day of their return and now he was once again becoming sorely aware of it. In his attempts to avoid Chanyeol, he has pushed everyone else away from himself too which, in the case of Jongdae, was very unfair. Whatever happened at the night of his shifting only added the cherry on top. He had needed time to recover from the nightmare he had lived through – guess he never really did. He had drowned in his misery, so much so, that he has forgotten all about the people and things that were dear to him.

The distance between them didn’t exactly help either and not to mention he actually grew up to be awkward and shy which made everything that much harder.

“You are a totally different person from the one I used to know. I have no idea how I am supposed to approach you at all. I am kind of hopeless in this matter because I don’t know what you are like anymore, Sehunnie. When we are talking I feel so conscious. It seems like somehow I will end up saying something that will widen the rift between us that is already so big.” Sehun felt tears stinging at the back of his eyes. He has never realized that he was hurting the people around him with his evasiveness. He has so much to think and care about that he has totally neglected what consequences his actions and attitude were evoking.

_First, Jongin and now Jongdae._

How many people was he actually hurting?

“I was mad at you, you know?” Jongdae divulged with a choked laugh.

“I promised to myself that I won’t bring up our past unless you do it, but look at me now. I feel mad at myself for not realizing that you were suffering all this time. You have no idea how…” Sehun was sure that the other male was still speaking. He could hear the muted and distorted sounds, but suddenly they made no sense.

He couldn’t make them out anymore.

It didn’t take him more than a second to slip back into the dark abyss of unconsciousness.

* * *

“You are trying to tell me that he has been extremely sick for the past four years and the same thing happened to him the last Blue Moon, still none of you bothered to inform _me_ ; his brother.” That was the first thing that reached Sehun’s ears when he slipped back into reality again. He still wasn’t able to move, speak or open his eyes, but his hearing was a lot clearer than the last time, and considering the fact that he could recognize the people in his room from their scent alone, it was safe to say that his sense of smell has returned to him too.

“Yixing, you went through his medical files! How can you not tell me?”

“Chanyeol, please calm down.” Yixing’s placating voice bounced off the walls of his room.

“Sehun’s file was handed over to me because he is my patient. There is a confidentiality code that I can’t break.”

“I don’t care about any codes. You should have told me. He almost died-”

“Stop with the bullshit, Chanyeol.” Sehun was shocked to realize that it was Baekhyun’s voice filled with so much anger and venom.

“Don’t think that we have forgotten about how you have treated Sehun since forever. Just because you decided to be nice to him suddenly doesn’t change the fact that you are the worst possible brother in this whole universe. You have no right to act as if we have wronged you.”

“Baekhyun,” Jongin called out in a warning tone.

“What?” Baekhyun bristled.

“Are we really going to pretend that he would have cared about Sehun if by some chance we have actually informed him of his condition?”

“I would have.” Chanyeol was practically growling by that point.

“You know nothing!”

“Exactly,” Baekhyun didn’t seem to be backing down.

“There was no way for us to know that you would, out of the blue, start caring about the brother whom you so generously dubbed as a burden when he called you a week before he shifted and quite literally begged you to be there for him because he was fucking terrified. Half the problems in his life wouldn’t have existed if you were there that day! _This_ wouldn’t have happened if you were not so fucking self-centered.”

_What the fuck is he saying?_

Sehun wished that he could move or speak so that he could shut his friend up who, in his anger, didn’t even realize what he was spouting out.

“What do you mean?” Kyungsoo’s confused voice reached his ears.

“What happened that day and what does it have anything to do with Sehun’s condition now?”

_“Nothing_ that concern any of you _.”_ Baekhyun scoffed before storming out of the room.

“Guys…” Yixing began after a moment of tense silence.

“For the love of Selene, you are standing in front of a person who has been unconscious for two days. Be a little considerate and stop fighting- Sehun!” A blurry image of Yixing greeted Sehun’s sight the second his drowsy lids fluttered open.

“Sehun? Can you hear me?” _Fuck._ Why was his head pounding and why the hell was it so hard to keep his eyes open?

“Hey, are you awake?” Yixing tried again when he got no response. In fact, it looked like Sehun’s eyes would again fall close any moment.

“Sehun…” And just like that, he lost his sense of awareness once more.

* * *

Fortunately, the third time he woke up there was no fight going on. Peaceful silence, with a distant cadence of insects jumping, greeted his ears as he tried to shift in his place to give some reprieve to his sore muscles. It was only then when he has turned on his side – admittedly with a lot more effort than usual – did he realize that he was actually able to move again.

“You are awake.” Sehun’s eyes shot open at once and his head automatically snapped in the direction the question came from. He got about only a second to contemplate the fact that it was Jongin who was standing by the window of his room with a mug of tea in hand before stinging pain shot up his temple.

“Y-Yeah.” He mumbled hoarsely before bringing up a shaky hand to cradle his forehead.

“Good.” Jongin drawled out while keeping his eyes pointedly fixed at something outside the window.

“You were asleep for three days.”

“Oh,” Sehun mumbled intelligently before stiffly lying on his back again.

“That’s better than last time. I was knocked out for a whole week back then.”

“I know.” His mate informed and took a sip out of his mug.

“Everyone was scared. You kept on retching blood even after you passed out.” Jongin wasn’t facing him.

Sehun was smart enough to know that it was no coincidence. His mate was deliberately avoiding looking in his direction.

A pang of pain went through his heart.

Even though he knew that he has no right to, he was hurt that the other male was ignoring him like that.

“Umm…what are you doing here?” Putting aside all the negative thoughts, he decided to carry on the conversation.

_At least, he is talking to me._

“What do you think?” Jongin shot back at him cryptically.

Sehun furrowed his brows in confusion – genuinely, not knowing what it was – but then he noticed how his whole room was shrouded in his mate’s scent.

_His scent must have helped me in getting better._

He might have been unconscious all this time, but his Wolf must have recognized its mate.

_No wonder, it took me only three days this time._

Biting his bottom lip, Sehun looked down at his lap and sluggishly trailed a finger along the tube that was inserted inside his vein with a help of the needle. He aimlessly followed its length and pressed his lips in a thin line when he caught sight of the blood bag hanging by the stand.

_I really must have lost a lot of blood._

On the other metallic arm of the stand, was a glucose bag which too had a small-bore IV line attached to it that was then inserted inside his arm. For some reason, there was a heart monitor connected to his body as well and if his eyes weren’t deceiving him then there was an Oxygen-

“Do you want to have some water? Your throat must be parched.” Jongin’s inquiry forced him to face the front again.

“Yes, please.” He requested softly and followed with watchful eyes as the other male pulled his body away from the window, stowed away the mug on the table, poured a glass of water, and then ultimately came to stand by his side. Even while standing so close to him, Jongin still didn’t look him in the eye which was driving his already exhausted mind crazy.

_Please, look at me._

“Let me help you sit up.” His mate offered listlessly and without waiting for any response he bent down to wrap an arm around his waist. Stunned, Sehun rapidly blinked his eyes at Jongin (in hopes of getting an explanation) before ultimately looking away (when he realized that there wasn’t going to be one given to him) because suddenly the other male was all over his personal space which was very overwhelming – not necessarily in a bad sense, but he didn’t want to think about it – and was making him feel flustered beyond belief.

“Can you scooch back a little on your own?” Jongin’s voice once again broke him away from his thoughts. Sehun nodded his head wordlessly and with the corporation of his mate he was able to sit with his back against the headboard after a few seconds of struggle. It was mostly done on his part – Jongin was surprisingly patient and didn’t snap at him to hurry up – because, for some reason, every part of his body was protesting against him moving at all.

“Here, drink some water. I will go and call Yixing.” Sehun watched in alarm when Jongin turned around to leave, after handing the glass over to him, and without having any proper coherent thought in mind he reached out to hold onto his arm.

As if it was some trick of magic, his mate froze.

“Are you upset with me, Jongin?” Sehun implored timidly and bit the inside of his cheek when silence – long, painful, and awkward – followed his question. It was after a minute or so (really, he was about to give up hope) before Jongin shifted in his place to turn around and face him again. All breath got knocked out of Sehun’s lungs, the second their eyes met.

There was pain, _so much of it_ , in those eyes mingled with fatigue and something else that he has never even thought of associating with the daring and cocky Alpha – fear.

“Will it matter if I am?” Jongin dared with a ticked brow before looking down at the hand that was still wrapped around his arm.

“Of course!”

_Shut up._

_You can’t tell him that._

“Then yes, Sehun. I am very upset with you.”

“J-Jongin I-”

“Let’s not talk about this now. I should call Yixing and you should rest. It is better for both of us. We will have this conversation, but when you are better and when I don’t feel like yelling at you.” Sehun followed Jongin’s figure out of the room for as long as he was still in his vision and slumped back in his place with a sigh.

_This is the first time he is genuinely so upset with me._

His mate’s anger wasn’t unwarranted or unjustified. Sehun knew that very well. They were mates. It didn’t matter whether they loved each other or not because there was still a bond. He could only imagine the pain, horror, and _helplessness_ that Jongin must have felt once he started retching blood.

_I would have stopped it if I could._

Why was Jongin mad at him? It wasn’t like Sehun asked for it. In fact, he would have given anything to avoid whatever happened.

_Is he pissed at me for not telling him about my condition?_

It made no sense.

They weren’t _that_ close, to begin with.

_Ughh…_

_My head hurts._

Maybe, he should stop thinking for the meanwhile.

* * *

“Hey, Sehun.” Yixing greeted blearily as soon as he walked inside his room.

“How are you feeling now?”

“As good as I can, given the circumstances,” Sehun responded honestly before casting a glance over Yixing’s shoulder to look for a certain someone.

“I sent Jongin back to his room.” It seemed like the other male had caught onto his intentions which made him flush in a heartbeat.

“He looked dead tired and still have University in the morning.”

“I-I wasn’t looking for him-”

“You know, despite being extremely busy with the pack matters, business, and the university he has been spending his nights staying awake by your side for the past three days. _You_ needed constant surveillance and his scent and presence were helping you in healing. I haven’t heard him complain a single time even when I can clearly see weariness taking a toll on him. You should really give the credit where it is due. He deserves it.” Sehun gaped at his doctor briefly, his heart practically throbbing inside his chest, before clearing his throat and responding.

“He seemed so upset with me though.”

“Can you really blame him?” Yixing questioned while making his way towards the bed.

“He is your mate, Sehun. Try to understand how the past three days of uncertainty have been for him.”

Sehun’s felt his stomach churning in anxiousness when he registered those words.

“You…you know?”

“Know what? The fact that you are Jongin’s mate or the fact that you are the White Wolf?” Yixing shot at him casually while fiddling with the IV tube that was attached to the blood bag.

“None of it is true!”

_Oh, Lord!_

_What am I supposed to do now?_

“Sehun, I have read your medical files.” Yixing faced him with a stern expression on his face.

“I don’t know what happened on the day of your shifting, but that scar on your waist isn’t there just because you were some helpless Omega in heat and pain. The Beta assigned to your cabin was a professional. One of the best. There has to be a very solid reason for whatever it is that happened. Moreover, your condition…it isn’t because you are empty inside. That makes no sense. All of that happens because you are suffocating your Wolf. I understand how Dr. Kang could have missed it but for me, who has gone out of his way to study all the biological ways that hunters could use against our kind, it wasn’t really hard to understand what was going on.” Sehun gazed down at his lap. At that point, there was nothing that he could do.

“You have a Wolf,” The other male continued with a sigh and sat down on the bed.

“If it is just any other Wolf you wouldn’t have lied about it. I had my doubts which were confirmed when I realized that you are Jongin’s mate the day you passed out.”

“How did you figure out I was Jongin’s mate?” Did Jongin spill the beans?

“Your condition wasn’t improving and it only got worse when I sent Jongin away. I did some quick math and called him back in.”

“So everyone knows now that I am Jongin’s mate?” Sehun was on the verge of panicking.

“No. It is only me and Junmyeon, of course, other than the ones who already knew. I didn’t mean to tell Junmyeon, but I can’t really hide anything from him. Plus, I sent everyone out of your room at night with the excuse that only your doctor can stay there when I was only making sure Jongin can stay with you unquestioned. Junmyeon kind of figured things out too when I went back to my room instead of staying with you.” Yixing explained before taking a hold of his arm and checking his pulse.

“I see.” What else was he even supposed to say? There was a short pause in their conversation as the other male went about his business, making sure that his patient was doing alright before Sehun decided to voice out the question that was bugging him.

“Umm…how did knowing that I am Jongin’s mate confirmed that I was the White Wolf?” Yixing’s hand stilled in their place for a split second before he continued with the task at hand almost as if he has never shown a reaction.

“I don’t know if you are aware, but the Seer of our pack prophecy an identification mark of the mate of every Silver Wolf when he turns twenty. Jongin’s mate’s mark was prophesied too.”

“I know that.” Sehun furrowed his brows. What did any of that have to do with him? He was sure that he has never shifted in front of the other male for him to be able to see his mark. Heck! Even Jongin hadn’t gotten to see his mark on his neck.

“The thing is along with that mark the Seer told us that he saw it on a coat of a White fur. Everyone thought that Jongin’s mate might have bi-colored fur, but I always had a feeling that it wasn’t the case. I have always known that Jongin’s mate was a White Wolf. My belief only strengthened when they failed to find his mate within the pack. I knew that the White Wolf was hiding. They always do. You aren’t the first one, Sehun.” Yixing gave him a small smile when he caught him gulping.

_Does that mean Jongin knew I was his mate the first day he returned back to the town?_

“You should rest now. It is almost five in the morning.”

“Yeah, sure. I will go to sleep.” Only if his racing mind and thoughts will give him a reprieve.

* * *

Thanks a lot for reading :)

Please comment to let me know what you think ^^

Kudos are always appreciated <3

**Author's Note:**

> I would like to read what you guys think about the story so please do share with me.  
> Also, this is my very first chaptered fic here so support would be appreciated.  
> 


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